


THE BIRMINGHAM SAGA

by DiamondLadyChe12



Series: Beyond Starlight Universe [2]
Category: Jem and the Holograms (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Kenneth - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:34:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 135,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21972166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DiamondLadyChe12/pseuds/DiamondLadyChe12
Summary: Cara gives her Dad a special surprise on the anniversary of not only one, but two meaningful events.
Relationships: Father|Daughter
Series: Beyond Starlight Universe [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2137002
Comments: 4
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

Teaser  
“Do you know where you are?”

Cara asked. I looked around. She laughed.

“Don’t tell me it’s been *that* long since you’ve been inside a studio.”

I then noticed on the walls The Soul Asylum.

“Well back then we weren’t in one nearly as nice as this and it has been a minute.”

I looked at Cara questioningly. I was a little confused. Neither she nor Reece had ever invited me to the studio to hear them lay down vocals. And then was she (like Reece) working on a solo album? Cara led me further down the hall to an electric, blue, lighted room and closed the door.

“Dad You’ve made so many sacrifices for us. All the shifts you’ve put in at work. All the times you’ve come to our games when you were dead tired. Just for you being there for us whenever we needed help with schoolwork or projects or just needed to talk about *anything*. You were always so cool and smooth. All the girls at our school wanted you as a father. And sometimes they just wanted you period."

Cara made a face. I just shook my head. Some of them girls I couldn't tell the difference between them and their mothers. They looked just that old. Some of em were even bold enough to make plays at me if you can believe it or not. I'd found more numbers slipped into my jacket pockets and through my car's window.

“Thank you. I don’t feel like we say that enough. Especially with what you did for me. I probably wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for you.”

“Hey now. What did I tell you about that? And you don’t have to thank me. *I’m* the one that should be thanking *you* for letting me be your Dad and letting me in period. That’s all the *thanks* I really need. Look at how far you’ve come Caryn. I couldn’t be prouder of you. And not just because of Eye Candy. For so much more than that.”

Caryn used to be so closed off with people. She had this don’t f**k with me air about her that even before she opened her mouth she rubbed people the wrong way because she always looked so mean. She didn’t smile. She didn’t talk to hardly anyone. And when she did choose to speak to you it was short and bitting. And she was always *so* quick to wanna fight. She’d fight you in a heartbeat! Sometimes I’m still amazed my daughters became friends. Shereece never held anything back and Caryn it didn’t take *anything* for her to go off on you. Now while she still wasn’t as sociable, she was a little more open

“Dad you should have your dream too. You deserve it.”

*This isn't the whole post by a long stretch and it isn't the new stuff I've been working on. There will be some posts that go backward (companion posts). But mostly I miss posting! 

with me approaching her. I thought for a minute how lucky I was again.  
“Dad you should have your dream too. You deserve it.”


	2. Chapter 2

Tasha:  
Bonding (Thursday)  
I got in the car and slammed the door of Mr. Jamison’s, expensive, Mercedes and slung my new Louis Vuitton, messenger bag on the floor. I tried to hide my surprise that he was the one waiting for me in the parking lot. I looked down at my phone screen. She hadn’t sent me any texts.  
“Hey. I hope you don’t mind me picking you up. Shereece had some last-minute things to do with the show.”  
He said flipping to a current, hip-hop, station 95.7 JAMZ  
“Thank you!”  
I said remembering my manners.  
“You didn’t have to change it.”  
I told him as he pulled out of the parking lot. I knew about ol Skool. My parents had grown up in the ’90s so I knew about Boyz 11 Men, Jodeci, H-Town, Karyn White, Public Enemy, NWA, KidNPlay, Guy. All of them. That’s all they played in their cars. They hated anything recent. And to be honest with you, not to be a traitor to my generation I like new hip-hop, but sometimes I think the old stuff was way better. I was raised on it after all. He laughed.  
“I actually listen to this station. See, I bet you didn’t think an *old* man would know nothing bout that. I’d like to think I’m still pretty woke!”  
He reached into his glove department and pulled out a book full of CD’s and popped in a Kendrick Lamar CD. I liked Kendrick’s music too. He started to rap a little.  
ALLS MY LIFE I HAS TO FIGHT  
ALLS MY LIFE I  
HARD TIMES LIKE “GOD”!  
BAD TRIPS LIKE, “YEAH!”  
NAZARETH, IM F’ED UP  
BUT IF GOD GOT US, THEN WE GON’ BE ALRIGHT  
WE GONE BE ALRIGHT  
WE GONE BE ALRIGHT  
WE GONE BE ALRIGHT  
DO YOU HEAR ME, DO YOU FEEL ME? WE GONE BE ALRIGHT  
He sounded just as good as Kendrick rapping. I wondered had he ever considered doing music like Shereece. I’d definitely download his CD if he put one out there.  
“So how was school today? You’ve been at Ramsey for 4 days now. Are you enjoying it?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Cool! Cool! Has the work been too hard?”  
“I’ve understood everything.”  
Actually, the classes I was in, really hadn’t been that much of a challenge. I’d finished all the work assigned for homework that night in the library during study period and after school waiting to be picked up.  
“Alright!I hear that! So you're smart hunh? Ok. I'll let you in on a secret. I went to Ramsey and even though I was making decent grades at Jones Valley middle school it took me a minute to get used to the workload at Ramsey. It was ALOT! I struggled for a semester until I finally found my way."  
"I didn't know you went to Ramsey."  
"I did! For all 4 years."  
"Did you grow up here?"  
"That's right. I grew up over in Wenonah with my folks. I'll have to show you sometimes."  
"Okay."  
"Nobody’s been bothering you, have they? I meet some good people at Ramsey when I was there. But I also know how they can be to new people. I’d hate to have to come up there. I kind of smiled. Mr. Jameson was way too pretty to throw blows. But he looked serious like he really would. Which was more than I could say for my old man, who NEVER had my back. Every time something went down at my school, he’d just look at me all tired like he knew I’d caused the fight or whatever drama. Ok so maybe I did half the time that didn’t mean *all* them times it was my fault.It would have been nice just once if he'd stood up for me or actually listened to anything I had to say. “No-one said anything.”  
“Good cause if they do, you just let me know and I’ll come up there and straighten em out. Did you meet anyone tho that you liked?”  
Did he mean boys? I thought about it.  
“There’s this girl in Science class. We talked a little bit. She was telling me about how she’s in this Dance group called The Slayers.”  
“Yeah. Ok. I’ve heard of them. I saw them last year. They were in the Magic City Classic Parade last year.”  
“What’s the Magic City Classic?”  
“So, you heard of the Super Bowl, right?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Well, it’s like our Super Bowl. It’s between my alma mater State (which YEAH, we hold the most wins true) and Alabama A*M. It kicks off with a parade, then we have tailgating at Legion Field, then the game, then there’s the big after-party. Not to mention all the pre-game festivities all week leading up to the game.”  
"What's tail-gating?" "Whaat? You never heard of tailgating. It's the best part. It's when a whole bunch of people park outside the stadium, set up tents, and talk about every kind of food you can think of. They break out the grills and you might see one tent with hamburgers and hotdogs. Another with steaks. Another with pulled pork. Another with chicken wings. It goes on and on into the night. And you know what the best part is?" "What?" I asked curiously. "It's all love! Everyone shares what they have. There's no fighting. No drama. Nothing like that. Just harmony." Didn't sound like any event with us I'd ever been to. I raised my eyebrows. Surely with all of those people there had to be *some* kind of drama. I was thinking yeah right. He noticed my dubious expression. "No lie! There hasn't been an incident yet of shooting or anything like that. Well, that I know of. Well not *there* anyway. Not that we don't have plenty of those." “So you go to the game?”  
“Yes, THOUSANDS of people come out from all over to attend the events. I usually go to the game with some of my frat brothers.”  
“Which frat?”  
“A PHI! You knooow!. It’s all about that black and gold.”  
“Do you think I can come to the Classic?”  
“Tell you what? I’ll come get you and ride you back myself. How bout that?”  
I paused. Debated if I could tell him.  
“I hear you like to dance?”  
I smiled shyly and nodded.  
“And that you and Sheerece are gonna be doing the routine tomorrow at the pep-rally.”  
I nodded again.  
“You think you're ready? They didn’t give yal a lot of time to get it down.”  
Usually being given a routine to learn in a short of time didn’t even phase me, but I said.  
“Are you coming to the pep rally?”  
“Of course!.”  
“What do you do?”  
I asked curiously.  
“I’m a Doctor. General. Surgeon. We’re about to stop by my office for a little. I have a couple of more patients to meet with today and then we can do something fun together. Shouldn’t take me that long. Maybe a couple of hours. We can stop anywhere you want and get lunch.”  
“Shereece was on the squad.”  
“That’s right. Freshman and sophomore year. My other daughter was on the dance team for a little.”  
He said proudly.  
“And you went to their games?”  
“Never missed one.”  
I looked at him doubtfully.  
“What? You don’t believe me. You can ask her. Now I may have been just a little late to some of em, but I was always there.”  
“How many hours do you work?”  
I asked. Trying to wrap my brain around how he could make *every* game  
“Probably about 80 a week. But it was important to me that my daughter always had someone to represent growing up. Sometimes it did get a little hectic trying to juggle a career and be an active parent, but I always knew what came first. And then my wife was constantly away so I didn’t want her to grow up resentful. Even though I had the money, I didn’t want to be the kind of ol man that just threw money at her and nothing else. You feel me?”  
“Yeah.”  
“So if that meant I had to go in early about 5:30 and get off at 5:00, get home, shower, and make it to a game about 7 or 8 then that’s what I had to do.”  
“You weren’t *tired*!?”  
“OH YEAH! I was TIRED as HELL! Jolt! Jolt and LOTS of caffeine pills back then. I’m just thankful that I was able to make it to those games in one piece. But a lot of times I knew friends that would drive that had kids on the team so it worked out. Honestly, between you and me I think I may have spoiled her *too* much. If I wasn’t there she’d lay a guilt trip on me and pout. I know I probably spoiled her more than I should have but I just wanted to give her more than I had I learned my lesson though after I had to go into the hospital for exhaustion her senior year. It scared me and I realized I wasn't Superman and I needed to slow my butt down and chill.”  
“My Dad never came to anything I did.”  
I mumbled, toying with my cell phone.  
“Well, now you got your Paw Paw Kenny. I’ma be right in the front row screaming and yelling and carrying on while MY girls KILL IT at that Pep rally tomorrow.”  
I looked at Mr. Jamison. DAMN he was schway and FINE! How come the boys I knew didn’t look like that? I took in his smooth, brown, skin, bald head (which looked good on him, his head wasn’t too big for it), hazel eyes (like Shereece’sss), and Dr’s coat. Then it hit me what he said. Did he really just call himself Paw Paw Kenny? He hadn’t even known me long, but in a weird way, I kind of liked it. I didn’t have any grandparents. All I knew was that both my Grandparents had died a long time ago. I may have met them, but when I try to remember all I get is hazy thoughts. Sometimes an old song will stir something.  
I tried to pull up a picture in my head. Mr. Jamison uh Paw Paw Ken (that was gonna take a minute) asked me what I wanted to eat. There was a McDonald’s right across the street from the hospital. He said they had a cafeteria on the inside too, and I told him that was ok. I knew he had to get back to his patients and I didn’t want to make him late. The cafeteria was immediately to the left when we walked into the lobby of the inside of the hospital. It was a large, open, space, with multiple food and drink areas.  
“Well, this is it. This is Princeton, my home away from home.”  
He said as my stomach started to grumble loudly as all kinds of smells hit my nose at once. A couple of people spoke to him as we walked around the side of the wall.  
“Have a seat. I’ll get it. Did you see anything you wanted? We have a new, wood-fired, pizza, oven. You should try the pizza. It’s decent.”  
“Ok.”  
I agreed easily.  
“I’ll be right back with that.”  
So not only did he look good he was a gentleman. I plopped my bag down on a table and looked around at the people walking around on the other side of the glass. When he got back with the container of slices and handed one to me. Then asked what I wanted to drink and went to get that, I felt like maybe I should give him something. I didn’t have that much money on me. I had spent all the money the Mauve lady had gave me. All I really had was 5.00. That would have to do tho. Although I *really* didn’t want to give up the last bit of money I had not knowing when I’d be able to get some more. I handed it out for him to take when he got back.  
“What’s this for?”  
“It’s for the food?”  
I explained. He laughed.  
“Girl if you don’t put that money right back up in your pocketbook. I GOT THIS! I think I can afford a few slices of pizza without it breaking me. But I do appreciate it tho. That was really nice of you to offer. But while you’re here I got you so don’t worry about it.”  
We took the elevator up to the 3rd floor where his office was located. His office was big and spacious and overlooked the parking lot outside. He moved some stuff round so I could make myself comfortable at his desk. I sat in his big chair.  
“So let’s see. I’ll go try to hunt up a plate. There’re some napkins in the bag. I’ll be in and out to check on you. Do you have a tablet or a laptop?”  
I shook my head.  
“We have a library at Haven house. If we want to do our homework, we can go in there. It has Macs and Kindle tablets and we can rent them for a couple of weeks. Some of them have their own tablets and laptops. The ones that work.”  
“Hmm. I see.”  
“Thad lets me keep the reader as long as I don’t damage it. I’m always borrowing it.”  
“Do you like to read?”  
I nodded and smiled.  
“Okay. Good! Good! I wish I had more time for it, but I do occasionally. So, you can get on my computer if you want to. I have a personal laptop it’s in my bag in my drawer. You can play on that. Whichever one you want.”  
He opened his bag and set his Mac in front of me.  
“Oh and..”  
He opened his desk and sat a few cards in front of me.  
“These are for iTunes and Amazon. I got some for Christmas gifts that I never used. If you want to buy something on either of those like music, or a movie, or a book you can use them all.”  
There were like 5 or 6 cards. Some had 50.00. One had 100.00.  
“I can have *all* these.”  
“Yeah.”  
He shrugged like it was cool.  
“Think of it as a Christmas gift from your Paw Paw Ken.”  
"Thank you!”  
I beamed.  
“And then maybe we can go buy Best Buy when I get off and pick you out a Macbook. If *that*s* the one *you* want.”  
I was about to thank him again when the door burst open.  
“Kenny I... Oh. I didn’t know you had company.”  
I looked up and a lady was standing in the doorway. She was tall, hair in a bob, and she looked like a mix of Black with Asian. She was also VERY busty! She wore a doctor’s coat like him. I already *KNEW* what was up.  
“Hey. Uh. This is my Grandbaby. She came down to visit me this weekend. Tasha this is Dr.Kimberly Lee.”  
The lady looked confused.  
“You didn’t tell me you had a grand-daughter and such a pretty one at that.”  
“Hi.”  
I said as he gave me a little wink.  
“I can come back.”  
She turned to leave.  
“Give me just a minute.”  
He told her and I could tell just by the lingering way his eyes followed her that he was GONE! She kind of flushed and closed the door softly behind her.  
"So do you need anything else?”  
He turned his attention back to me.  
“I want to make sure your good.”  
“I’m good.”  
“Your good?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Alright, so I’ll be in and out. The bathroom’s right outside if you need to go. Anything else here’s my cell number.”  
He slid a card to me.  
“Text me and I’ll be in here as quick as I can. Let me go check on these last patients.”  
“Paw Paw?”  
“Yeah.”  
He turned back around.  
“Can you tell me about what you do?”  
His face broke out in a grin.  
“It would be an honor to tell you what I do. Do you know that not even Shereece has *ever* asks me that? Thank you. We’ll talk on the way home. I think I want to go see that new Avenger’s movie tonight. Do you know I haven’t seen that yet? Do you wanna keep me company.”  
“Yeah.”  
“Good be back in a flash!”  
He said and closed the door. I sat back in the chair. I was starting to feel some weird feeling I hadn’t felt before. I shrugged it off as I started to unwrap my pizza. That’s when I noticed Paw Paw had left his Apple watch sitting on the desk, inches away from me. I’d only ever been close enough to one of those in a store case at the Apple store. I reached over and picked the watch up in my hands.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara runs into Harlem after not seeing him in months at Moonbucks and they play catch up.

Cara:  
Long Time No See  
Thankfully Moon Dollars (Starbucks) wasn’t that crowded that day. I had a craving for a holiday White Chocolate Mochaccino like no one’s business. I put in my order and looked around for a table. I turned around and sitting at a table by the window was the last person I expected to see.  
“Hey.”  
I slid into a chair. Harlem looked up and removed the BOSE headphones he had on.  
“Mind if I join you?”  
I asked. He looked like he was a million miles away.  
“Hey! Long time no see. Yeah. I can’t promise you what kind of company I’ll be though.”  
He did look a little worn-up. Tired. He looked like he'd had a fight with life and it had kicked his ass majorly.  
I reached over and reached out to touch his braided cornrows.  
“New look?”  
“Yeah. I was just trying something.”  
“It looks good on you.”  
I said in admiration.  
“Thanks!”  
He gave me a half-smile.  
“So, are you here for good now?”  
The last I heard he was in Georgia. He’d fallen off the radar for a minute. In this chaotic story, it was very easy to lose track of people over the years.  
“Yeah for now. I’ve been thinking about going back to school. I stopped for a while. I’m not gonna lie to you, I’ve been in a really fucked up place over the years. I got off track with a whole lot of stuff, but someone told me about this audition they’re holding for the Bone bio-pic, and I think I have a good chance so.”  
“Congrats in advance!”  
Back in the day Harlem used to know and spit those lyrics backward and forwards. His skills were tight! I’d always admired that about him.  
“Thanks! I am a little nervous about it. I don’t know the first thing about acting and it’s been a minute since I even listened to any of the songs. I don’t wanna look crazy in front of a room full of people and go blank when I’m supposed to be auditioning.’  
“Boy, please! You know you got this!”  
I rolled my eyes. I knew it. Hell, he knew it! I don't know why he was fronting like he didn't know he was the shit. He really needed to stop playing.  
“Oh, you think so hunh?”  
I gave him a look like it’s DONE!  
“You’ve acted before in a movie and video’s right.”  
“Yeah. What’s up?”  
The trick about acting was getting used to the cameras. Once you got comfortable enough to pretend they weren't there it got a lot easier. I really had to work on that in the beginning when we'd shot our first video and Sharayah's movie. Some people just seemed to be born to do it. For me well.. let's just say it took a lot of re-takes.  
“Well, maybe you can come with me and be my acting coach?”  
“When’s the audition?”  
He flashed his Apple Watch.  
“In about an hour from now.”  
"You want me to teach you what I know in an hour?"  
I looked at him in amusement.  
"Well, I guess I just kinda need the support."  
"Yeah? I gotcho."  
Why not? I thought, Not like I was doing anything else today. Besides Harlem and I went way back. He and Reece may have fallen out but he and I didn't have any issues. As far as I was concerned he was good people.  
“Thanks, Cara. I really appreciate it. At least *your* still speaking to me.”  
I raised my eyebrow.  
“Why wouldn’t I be?”  
“Come on! I know my ex has probably called me all kinds of bitches and hos after what went down in Orlando. That wasn’t one of my finest moments.”  
Harlem had shown up in Orlando at a Christmas dinner we'd had for Starlight artists with his new well I didn't know what the hell she was. Girlfriend? Plaything? Friend with Benefit? But it was awkward for Reece and ATL (who'd both dated him). And seeing that she was also a Starlight artist. I honestly didn't see what the big deal was. I mean Reece "claimed" she was over him a long time ago so what difference did it make? And ATL was engaged now. It all seemed like a bunch of mess to me. I didn't know her all that well but she just seemed like the type to bring him to throw him up in Reece and ATLs faces as if to say "Yeah he's with *me* now."  
“Actually, she really doesn’t tell (me) much of anything these days.”  
I said a little sourly and stirred my drink a little more forcefully than necessary  
“So it’s true then?”  
I nodded.  
“Damn! That’s fucked up!”  
"It is what it is." I shrugged. I was tired of thinking about it. “I mean what you gone do? You gone be ok?”  
He asked looking at me in concern. I shrugged.  
“I have some other things. I still teach dance at the Starling and I work with some artists on Sapphire’s label. She tried to get me to sign on with her but... I don’t know. I’m good right now. “  
I decided to let him in on my newest passion.  
“I’ve been street racing for a minute and I’m gonna build my own car.”  
“So that’s what’s up? Niiice! A’ight. I may have to come to see you race sometimes and cheer you on.”  
“Cool!”  
I murmured. Harlem glanced out the window.  
“Can I tell you something personal?”  
“Of course.”  
“I think I fucked up Caryn! Do you know that girl I showed up with at the Christmas party?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Well she came by today and she told me she’s two months pregnant, and it’s mine.”  
“Damn!”  
“I know. I just... I can’t even say it’s not mine. I knew I messed around with her a few times and I know I didn’t use anything with her or any of the others I been with. I know it was dumb. I just wasn’t thinking straight. Now I think she caught feelings. I’m just not ready. I’m not ready for a relationship. Not right now. I mean I like Deja. She cool as hell.”  
I just listened as he started to list the reasons he thought he should be into this chick/ “She smart. She can cook. She a freak in bed. Nice ass. Real nice!”  
Too much information Harlem, I thought.  
“It was cool at first, but now she's calling me all the time. Wanting to know where I am and who I'm with. She even recorded this song for me.”  
He found the text with the audio file and started to play it for me.  
FEELINGS SO DEEP IN MY FEELINGS  
NO, THIS AINT REALLY ME  
CAN'T CONTROL MY ANXIETY  
FEELING LIKE IM TOUCHING THE CEILING  
WHEN IM WITH YOU, I CAN’T BREATHE  
BOY YOU DOING SOMETHING TO ME  
OOH, NO ILL NEVER GET OVER YOU UNTIL I FIND SOMETHING NEW  
THAT GET ME HIGH LIKE YOU DO, YEAH YEAH  
OH NO, ILL NEVER GET OVER YOU UNTIL I FIND SOMETHING NEW  
THAT GET ME HIGH LIKE YOU DO  
LISTEN TO MY HEART GO BA DA BOO’D UP  
BIDDY -DA-DO BOOD UP  
I frowned. The song was … mediocre at best. Harlem stopped the recording.  
“She isn’t. putting that out, is she?”  
“I wouldn’t put it past her.”  
“Damn! You must have put it on that girl GOOD!”  
I laughed. “Not funny. I’m damn sure, not ready to be a father. I’m trying to get back in school and work part-time for Amazon doing deliveries. No idea how I’m gonna tell my pops.”  
“Did you talk to her and tell her you’re not ready to commit to her right now?”  
“Caryn come on! I know I’ve been an asshole, but what was I suppose to say? "Harlem I’m having a baby. Nah I’m good. I ain’t trying to be with one girl right now." That would have been *cold*. Now I just kinda feel obligated. I mean what if I tell her and she miscarries. I don’t want that to happen. No, I guess I’m just gonna have to man up and do the right thing.”  
“But you can’t lie to her either and do your thing with whoever else on the side.”  
“I just don’t wanna hurt her. *I’m* the one that got her into this. I don’t know maybe I should just give being with her a chance.”  
“Do you know what she’s having?”  
“Not yet. I’m supposed to go to the doctor's with her for a check-up next week? I think.”  
“Are you gonna be ok tho?”  
I couldn’t imagine myself having a kid. Honestly, I just never wanted any. The idea just didn’t do anything for me personally.  
“No, but I don’t really have a choice, do I? But I guess it might put some things in perspective. It might make me into a better man. I use to didn’t drink or smoke, but now I do it all the time, I don’t like how it’s changing me. I almost don’t know myself when I look at myself in the mirror now Caryn. I wake up with a different female in my bed every morning (sometimes two) and I don’t even remember who the hell they are. I used to be a good guy.”  
“We all go through times when we wild out a little.”  
I told him understandingly. Didn’t I know that?  
“But it seems like your going in the right direction.”  
“I think I’m turning into a sex-addict. I can never quite seem to get it enough.”  
“You gone be aiight. What you need to do is get back into the studio and drop a hot, ass, track and get your mind off it.”  
I hit his arm playfully.  
“Yeah? I don’t know. I’m kinda rusty.”  
I made a face like psh.  
“We just need to get you in the studio again and lay something down. It’ll come back to you like that.”  
I snapped my fingers.  
“What you need to do is take all *this* and let the lyrics speak for you.”  
“That’s actually not a bad idea. Yeah. I’ ma see what I can do.”  
He smiled. Damn he got a nice smile. It was the first time I'd really noticed.  
“Thanks, Caryn!”  
“Not a problem.”  
“I guess we better get to this audition hunh if I’m gonna get this role?”  
“Yeah. Just let me go get my order and we can be out.”  
Just as they called my order he stood up and said.  
“It’s cool. I got that.”  
“You don’t have to.”  
“Think of it a token of my appreciation.”

p>"I just need to go to the bathroom a sec. I'll be right out."  
"Alright."  
As I got up and walked to the bathroom, I got that feeling you get when someone's eyes are on you. But there weren't that many people in the restaurant. I turned around and I saw Harlem's eyes glance down in the direction of my rear end, but just as quickly his eyes were on his phone. I saw him curse and accept the call. Then I could hear her going off on the other end. Must have just been my imagination. Yeah, he better not be staring at me. I wouldn't wanna have to rough him up in Moon Bucks and it make the headlines for Kool Trash magazine. I snorted as I thought of what the story would be. RNB singer formally of Eye Candy and her new man have a lover's quarrel in Moonbucks over the birth of his other lover's also recording artist on Starlight's label Deja Harris of the Porcelain Dolls. AS IF!


	4. Chapter 4

Kenneth  
Bonding  
I opened the door for her and closed it behind her. Another day behind me that hopefully, I’d done some good in this world. All my patients seemed to be doing well and I’d delivered a healthy, 9lb, baby girl, this morning. As I looked at the glowing parents, I couldn’t help but think it hadn’t been that long ago that Bianca and I had brought our own little miracle into this world after two miscarriages. We’d named her Shereece a combination of my mom’s name (Reese) and my wife’s mother’s name (Sherri). I’d even managed to get a response from the diabetic company that produced Novolog to give consent to a woman in her 40’s that had to pay a ridiculous amount of money for it monthly. It always angered me when I thought about how pharmacies tried to get over with these asinine charges they put on patients. Particularly when it didn’t take that much money to produce the stuff. Usually, when I got off, I switched it to a mellow station that played jazz. I have different stations for different times of the day. After work was the time, I just needed my mind to be quiet from all the noise of the day. “Paw Paw are you tired?”  
My grand-baby asked.  
“Does it show that much?”  
I kind of glanced at myself in the mirror checking for signs of lines and droopy eyes.  
“I can drive us home. You can rest. I’m a good driver. You have to tell me what way though.”  
“You can drive? How old are you?”  
“Thirteen. I’ve been driving since I was 9.”  
I thought about it. Looked her over. She could definitely pass for 15. Even though she had a young face her height made up for it. I doubted anyone would stop us and she was with me. And I was slightly impressed that she didn’t seem scared at all to drive in an unfamiliar city. Shereece had taken her time learning to drive and had waited almost until the end of her junior year to even try for her permit and license. I quickly got out and let her trade places with me as I got in the passenger seat and let her get in the driver’s seat. I wanted to let her know I trusted her. Something she hadn’t seemed to have gotten a lot of I saw her carefully buckle her seat belt, and adjust the mirror. She gently eased the car into drive and circled around to the gate where they collected the money for parking. I passed her a few dollars from my wallet so she wouldn’t get the ridiculous notion again to go into her own purse. I made a note to slip a few notes in there myself before she left. Did they even give them money at this Haven House? Now having two teenage daughters who I’ve let drive my cars before, you kinda just have to pray that you’ll get to your location without having a heart attack on the way, but after a few minutes of the ride, I relaxed and loosened my grip on the door. She was handling it just as she’d said she’d done this before.  
“Who taught you how to drive so good?”  
“I taught myself.”  
I didn’t press for more but after a few she said.  
“Back home I hung with some older kids in my neighborhood. They had access to some cars.”  
The way she said “had access too” I knew meant it wasn’t legit access, but again I didn’t question her on it. We all had past. Lord knows I’d done some stupid stuff when I was her age.  
“You drive better than a lot of adults I know twice your age. Do you know that?”  
“Yeah.”  
She said like I know.  
“So, you stay at Haven House? Can you tell me about it?”  
She looked like she was thinking about what to say.  
“It’s crowded!”  
She finally came up with after a few pauses.  
“And you don’t like it I take it?”  
Again, she looked like she didn’t know what to give about the place. Which set off red flags in my head. Did they treat them badly there? I may have to look into this Haven House?  
“It’s ok. They don’t breathe down our backs all the time or give us a bunch of rules to follow. Well, most of the Guardians don’t.”  
“Yours does?”  
“She doesn’t like me. She doesn’t want me there. But no-one really likes her but this one girl on my floor that tries to kiss up to her. She’s a ... She’s not a nice person.”  
“What about the other kids? Do you have a lot of friends at Haven?”  
She shook her head.  
“They don’t really like me neither.”  
“I find that hard to believe.”  
“I don’t care! I don’t really like them neither. They don’t trust me. They always look at me like I’m going to steal their stuff.”  
“Why would think that?”  
She kind of shrugged.  
“Because they’re stupid.”  
She mumbled.  
“I don’t want their old stuff.”  
I made a face like psh.  
“Why the hell would you want what they got? You got your own stuff.”  
She didn’t really respond and I don’t think she quite picked up on where I was going with that. See I heard what she hadn’t said. All teenagers wanted nice things. When I was her age I wanted to be that guy with the latest shoes, and gear, and gadgets. And sometimes while I did love my parents and I knew they gave me what they could, as a teenager sometimes you don’t always appreciate it when they tell you no-you can’t have the latest video game because it’s just not in the budget. And it did tend to make me angry that I while they were coming to school showing off there’s I might not have the thing until months later or next year for that matter. Believe it or not, I did go the whole route of even trying to sling weed. It last right up until my Pops found out and sent me to stay with relatives in Georgia for about a year. It’s true, I hadn’t known Tasha all that long and I didn’t know how much she’d let me in, but I was already starting to care about that little girl and I wanted her to know I’d help her any way I could. I also understood what this did to a teenager with all that pressure and temptation.  
“So I’ma get all in your business. Is there anyone special at Haven House?”  
She made a face.  
“Not really?”  
“Nobody?”  
I raised my eyebrows but, in a house, full of teens and pre-teens and young adults it was hard for me to believe that as pretty as she was not one of those lil boys had noticed and made any moves.”  
“Well, there was this one boy.”  
“Mmm-hmm I knew it. Who is this boy?”  
“He’s not there any-more. He got picked to be on a TV show called Fabulous and he moved to New York.”  
“And yal didn’t stay in contact? Do you still talk to him?”  
“They turned off my phone and I heard he got with one of the girls on the show.”  
I had a hunch she meant not the guardians at Haven but her own parents.  
She said bitterness crept into her voice.  
“So, you really liked him hunh?”  
“I don’t know. I thought we were friends. But he just left and I never heard from him anymore so I guess not.”  
“But you said your phone was off. How do you know he didn’t try to call? Maybe he thought *you* moved on.”  
She just shrugged and mumbled.  
“He shoulda tried harder then. He knows where I stay at.”  
“So, what’s his name?”  
“Khalil.”  
She mumbled keeping her eyes on the road.  
“Khalil.”  
“Calloway.”  
“Just wanted to know my grandson in law’s name so when I meet him, I’ll know.”  
Tasha rolled her eyes and mumbled.  
“He’s just a dumb boy I meet at Haven Paw Paw. He’s gone and he was nobody. And what about you and Mrs. Lady.”  
“Yeah she’s mine. See, unlike yal I ain’t scared to claim it.”  
“Cause it ain’t nothing to claim.”  
“What you wanna know? Come with it?”  
“She seems nice!”  
“She really is. It’s one of the many things I love about her. She has a big heart and she’s very giving.”  
Tasha made an amused face, a kind of a smirk.  
“What?”  
“Nothing.”  
“No what?”  
“Nothing. I didn’t say anything.”  
“Girl I know that look. Did you forget who my daughter is? Please. That looks means yeah right. Oh, I think I know what.”  
It hit me what Reece said when we talked some days ago about Tasha asking if she could get her breast enlarged.  
“I mean. Yes, I attracted to her uh physical qualities at first and I noticed. But that wasn’t the *only* thing she had going for her or it wouldn’t have kept my interest.”  
I’d gone out with some ladies who had BANGING bodies. Plenty back and front but that’s about *all* they had going for them. Tasha said.  
“She told you.”  
She didn’t sound embarrassed about it though.  
“You probably have known her long enough now to know if anything she’s very straight forward with everybody. Sometimes brutally so. But I taught her early that no matter what she could come to me with -anything-. And she took that and *ran* with it. Sometimes even now I regret that but she will quickly remind me hey you told me I could tell you anything. And I want you to feel that way to Tasha. I don’t embarrass or scare easily. I had a wife, I had daughters, I have female patients I had a mother. So, I’ve heard just about everything in the book and I’d like to think I’m a pretty opened minded guy.”  
“But Paw Paw. It’s different now.”  
She sighed.  
“Have you seen video’s these days? Have you’ve seen Cardi, and Megan, and Nikki. That’s what they want. They don’t want..”  
“I know it might *seem* that way and yeah a lot of us *are* caught up on that. But it’s not always. Take my frat, Keith. He’s been dating this lady for a while now and they live together. She has a big booty and big breasts. That’s what he wanted. Back when we went to school together that’s all he use to look at and talk to me about and eventually that’s what he got. He got with a stripper. But while yes his physical needs might have been met, now he calls me all the time. “Ken man I think she’s cheating on me.” “Ken it ain’t like it use to be. She use to want me.” “Ken she turned down my proposal.” So what I’m saying is the bigger the better doesn’t always mean *quality* ya feel me? Reece’s mother wasn’t a D. She was a B when I met her. Reece wasn’t either, but I know you know about her ex Harlem.”  
She raised her eyebrows.  
“Oh, you’ll learn since you’ll be playing her in the movie. All I’m saying is if the guy loves you -really loves you- that won’t matter.”  
“Whose Harlem?”  
“Harlem was Reece’s boyfriend for about 2 years.”  
“Why they break up?”  
“That’s a *good* question. I’ll let her tell you some of it but mostly it’s because she got scared and pushed him away.”  
She made a confused face and I could almost her thinking again. Reece? Scared?  
She got quiet. I laughed.  
“Don’t get quiet on me. That wasn’t a lecture “You better not.” No that’s not what I was trying to tell you.” At the end of the day, it’s your body and it’s your choice. I’d never try to tell a woman what to do with her body. I’m just trying to tell you don’t get caught up with all this social media stuff dictating to you what we wanna see. It’s not true. Ok well, it’s a half-truth. We go for substance too.”  
“Do you do... surgeries?”  
“Yeah but not that kind. But what I could do if you really wanted this thing what I could do is I could recommend you someone I know that does implants that’s pretty good from what I know. I mean if your gonna get em you might as well get em done right. You don’t want one bigger than the other or lopsided or something. That ain’t HOT!”  
I said imitating Shereece and Tasha kinda laughed  
“It’s not for *them* it’s for me. And besides, I’m not old enough and I don’t have the money yet even if I wanted to.”  
“Well that just means you have some time to think on it. You may have changed your mind by then.”  
“So, tell me what you do?”  
“You really wanna know about that hunh?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Ok. Well I use get up around 5:30 and either I run around the block or I have a home gym so I work out. Then I either eat at home or stop by a fast food joint or eat in the cafeteria. They serve breakfast. Then I go into my office and go through emails, and faxes, and see if there’s anything that needs to be sent in like prescription refill request or recommendation requests to see specialist. Stuff like that. If I’m needed for a surgery during early hours, I’ll head to that part of the hospital to prepare for it and speak with the patient and their family. Or if not, I’ll get ready to meet with the first one around 8 when I start taking patients. I get a lunch. If I’m hungry I’ll either find something there or I might bring something and go get it out the fridge. Sometimes if I’m really tired I’ll just close my eyes at my desk and nod off. Or I might reach out to Reece and Cara or my brother to see what’s going on with them for an hour. Then the afternoon pretty much goes the same unless they call us for staff meetings.  
“Do you make a lot of money?”  
“I do ok. Annually I make about 600,000. It’s a nice chunk of change but it’s not about the money for me. I just like knowing at the end of the day I made a difference in at least one person’s life. If I can do that for at least one person every day until I retire, I feel like I’ve done what I was put here to do you know?”

“What if you don’t know what your purpose is. I mean I like to dance. I’m happy when I dance.”  
“Alright so maybe your purpose is to share your gift with others or it could be down the line to give others back the same passion you feel when you dance and teach it to them, kids or adults.”  
She looked thoughtful.  
“Or maybe you just haven’t found it yet. Maybe it’ll just hit you one day.  
“Did you always know you wanted to be a doctor?”  
“Not always. When I was your age or a little older, I wanted to be a fireman. I wanted to be like my Pops.”  
“What changed your mind?”  
“Ironically it was when I lost him to a fire and that went up in smoke.”  
“I’m sorry Paw Paw.”  
“It’s okay. Pops and I had some good memories. He taught me a lot. I never knew my biological Dad. Dude walked out on my Moms before I was even born. As I knew it he was a friend of his and he stepped in and started doing things for Moms and then I guess after a while he just stayed. He was the only father I ever knew.”  
She sighed.  
“Paw Paw don’t feel bad. Sometimes I feel like I didn’t know my father either. He wasn’t never there.”  
That really was a shame. Couldn’t he see what a beautiful, little, girl he had? I decided to lighten the mood.  
“So about or plans tonight?”  
“You don’t have to do anything with me if you don’t want to I understand if you just wanna chill.”  
“I promised you a movie and Best Buy and we’re gonna see a movie and go to Best Buy. What I’ll do is we’ll go home, I’ll shower, close my eyes for a little, and then we can stop by the store first and then see a late show. How about that?”  
She raised her eyebrows.  
“School, the pep rally?”  
“Well I mean tomorrow is Friday. The pep rally’s are usually after lunch. You aren’t *really* enrolled so I give you permission to skip your morning classes and sleep in. Then we can roll out. I’ll go to work then duck out a little early. I have a light day tomorrow. I’ll come get you and take you to the pep rally.”  
She looked skeptical. I laughed.  
“I’ll talk to Shereece. It’ll be cool.”  
“She told me it wasn’t a good look to sleep all day.”  
“Please. I use to have to drag her butt out of bed on the weekends. If not, she’d sleep till two in the afternoon. And school days now those were a fight. She ain’t NEVER wanna get up and go to school.”  
“Well… “  
“You good. I just need a couple of hours.”  
“Cool.”  
We drove in silence for a little while and I admit I nodded. Halfway to the house I got a text from one of my boys and decided it was probably best to swing by Best Buy first and pick out her MacBook so I gave her directions how to get to the Summit where the nearest Apple store was.  
“You wanna go to swing by this thing tonight?”  
“What thing?”  
“Some of the brothers at UAB are having a probate for some of the neos. It starts at 8:00.”  
“That’s cool.”  
“Cool.”  
After I made sure all her technology was up to date and on point, and we’d both slay at the step-show and movie with new outfits bags in hand we pulled up to the house. She looked a little tired herself. I know I was. After I let us in she plopped down on the couch in the den.  
“Thank you Paw!”  
“Fa sure! Now lets see I got all of em, Netflix. I got Hulu, I got Prime. I even got Disney Plus. I got HBO, Showtime, Starz. Sports. Whatever you wanna watch.”  
I handed her the remote.  
“And if you get hungry you can have anything in the refrigerator. I even have some ice-cream up in there that I *just* got. You can break that in if you want it. But if you want something to snack on I made some cheese dip and it’s some tortilla chips on the counter.”  
“Ok.”  
“So, if you need me, I’ll be in my room. It’s on the top floor at the end of the hall and you know where Reece’s room is.”  
“I think I’m gonna lay down.”  
Yeah. I realized she must have had a long day and here I was about to drag her out to hang with me tonight. I was something of a night owl. I grabbed her bags and she followed me up the stairs and feel against Reece’s bed. I was about to turn around but stood in the doorway.  
“You know we don’t have to go out tonight. We can stay in and watch movies.”  
I’d gotten carried away I know. When was the last time Reece or Cara were this age and actually wanted to hang out with their ol man? While Reece loved for me to be there at her games and all her school stuff and we occasionally did the father-daughter thing by this age hanging out with a parent was just lame. Cara was a different story and didn’t give a damn about popularity and she’d hang out with me from time to time. That is until she meet *him* and I saw her less and less.  
“No, I want to. I’m just tired.”  
“I’ll let you rest then.”  
I gave Tasha one last look she already looked like she was dozing off. I went over pulled a blanket over her, turned off the light, and closed her door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the pep rally for the tournament for Ramsey High School in Birmingham Alabama starts, Shereece thinks back on her first pep rally and is face with a long time rival who gives her her something long-past due.

Reece:  
That Ol Purple Pride

I was waiting outside the gym for my cue to enter. After the basketball team was announced, Principal (Walker) would then introduce me and give me a special presentation. Of course, I already knew what it was. They were going to present me what an honorary RHS cheer-leading uniform. Then I’d join the cheerleaders on the floor for our special routine that I’d practiced all week. I couldn’t help, but think DAMN (as I looked at all the crowds of students and parents) all lite in the stands) I hadn’t done this in FOREVER! And I hoped I didn’t fall and straight buss my ass in front of all these people. Cuz wouldn’t black Twitter just love that shit! PLEASE! You GOT this! I thought and snorted. Cause even if I did fall, I’d be damned if I let *them* know it. I’d turn it into the hottest, move, they ever saw and have them imitating it all over social media. I was standing there lost in thought. I was looking through the door, but I wasn’t seeing the present. I was hearing the squeaks of sneakers on hard-wood and a ball being bounced. I was hearing voices talking in the crowd through the stands. I was seeing the basketball team standing on the other side of the gym dressed to kill in dress shirts, ties, and slacks. And I was looking at *him*. His eyes locked with mine through the glass and he nodded as if to say you got this cause your my girl! I blinked. For a minute, I was standing there with a long, weave, pony-tail, down my back, big, gold, hoop, earrings, and my old purple and white top and cheerleading skirt. It was my first pep-rally. Then I started to feel the same nerves rushing back to me. I saw Daddy standing to the side video-camera in hand and by him on the bleachers sat a huge, balloon, bouquet, flowers, and a bag. Mom was standing next to him in a white, stomach-baring top, jeans, and flower earring-She’d actually come to this one. The others not so much. I heard my old Principal Mc Gee's voice calling the staring line up. Then I snapped out of it and came back to the here and now. And speaking of who I *should* be seeing, where the hell was Tasha? I pulled out my phone and quickly started to text. If she was still laying her ass up in my bed, I’d kill her *and* him for letting her stay out all night. I mean what the hell was Daddy thinking? That was *not* why I brought her here. He sure the hell didn’t let me stay out past midnight on a school night at 13. And yes I know she ain’t enrolled at Ramsey but what kind of message would that send if. The Principal had called me into her office this afternoon before things got crazy and she told me that she had something to tell me. My guard had immediately went up cause Tasha may act all sweet and innocent and have Daddy fooled but just days ago she’d stole Shana’s bracelet. I’m not saying people can’t change but 6 days? “Hey.”  
Immediately I stiffened. It was *her*.  
“Jennifer.”  
I addressed her nonchalantly. All the while, I was thinking don’t think I forgot what you did bitch.  
“So, it looks like we’re sharing the floor again.”  
I gave her a crazy look.  
"What?"  
“They didn’t tell you.”  
“Tell me?”  
“My son is on the team and not to brag but he’s the lead center, and because I danced professionally on an NBA team they wanted me to do the routine. So I guess you weren’t the only one who did big things when we left this place.”  
Yeah ok, so you were a Mamba girl I knew about it. She *would* try to throw that all up in my face. Wasn’t nobody studdin the Black Mamba’s.  
“You weren’t at practice.”  
“I work afternoons and evenings. I own my own architectural firm here now. I worked with some of the team in the morning when I dropped my son off.”  
“That’s good to know.”  
I mumbled. The message wasn’t missed on me. I got my own firm.  
“I heard you have a daughter here too.”  
“Yeah well, you know. It runs in the family.”  
I snapped. Not quite sure why I’d said that Tasha was my daughter. It probably had something to do with the way she was bragging on her son like he was the shit because he was the star on the team.  
“I saw you dropping her off the other day. She looks just like you.”  
“Thanks.”  
She didn’t need to be all up in my business. I’d let her continue to think Tasha was mine. In a way she *was* so it wasn't an all-out lie. All long as I had her in my employ she was mine.  
“Hey, before we go out there, I just wanted to say something.”  
She reached inside her jacket and handed me a box. I looked at the thing wearily.  
“Open it. Please.”  
I did and inside was.  
“My bracelet.”  
I said quietly and slid it on my arm. I knew that bitch had it.  
“My mom passed recently and I was cleaning out some of the things in our old house and I found this in my room.”  
Did she expect a thank you?  
“I think I owe you an apology.”  
Hell yeah, you owe me an apology I thought.  
“It was my mom’s. It was the birthday present she gave me before.”  
I cut the thought off.  
“I am *so* sorry Shereece. I didn’t know. You were right. I was ..jealous. Everything just seemed to come so easy to you. You had the perfect family. Your mom was on every magazine cover. Every girl in the school wanted to get at your Dad and he had a CRAZY bank. His ride was tight. Your ride was tight! Girl, your first car was a Benz! You came to school just killing it day after day after day and your man was PHOINE AS HELL! You had EVERYTHING! Do you know what I came home to? An alcoholic father that abused my mother and ended up evidently putting a gun to his head. And a mother that got strung out on cocaine.”  
“Damn! I didn’t know.”  
I murmured.  
“So, if I gave you hell it was because I was going through it my damn self.”  
I sighed.  
“Yeah well I mean I wouldn’t necessarily call my life back then perfect. I know I had it going on but.”  
There were things she didn’t know about either. My parents were FAR from perfect. Had I not intervened and laid all those guilt trips on my father to come to all my events, he would have turned his-self into a work-a-holic- to make up for the fact that his wife was all over the world screwing anything with breasts or a piece. And then there was my absentee mother who felt like she needed to be at every damn foreign event or she’d die rather than be at home with her man and her daughter. But now really wasn’t the time to get into all that. I could not let this fuck my head up. I looked at Jennifer and all of a sudden, it just didn’t seem worth it to be mad at her anymore.  
“I guess you just never know. I think we just got off on the wrong foot. But it’s a new year so let’s just go out there and turn up. Or don’t they say that anymore?”  
Jennifer laughed.  
“Girl don’t make me lie. I can’t keep up.”  
“We should come up with our own word.”  
“We should. What can I word be?”  
But before we could think of a good one we heard Principal Walker  
“This afternoon, I have a special treat for yal because we have here with us two of our most successful alumni. You’ve seen her performing on courts all around the globe as one of the lead dancers for the Mambas and now she’s over her own architect firm right here in B-ham. On your feet everybody for JENNIFER MITCHELL!”  
I nodded to Jennifer and she walked through the door to a standing O. I watched as her son stepped forward and presented her with a bouquet of red roses and kissed her on the cheek.  
“And our next alumni needs no introduction. She’s topped the charts week after week with her group Eye Candy and now as a solo artist. You’ve seen her on movie screens as one of the witches from the Allowan Ashes series and you’ll see her soon in her upcoming biopic EYE CANDY THE UNTOLD STORY. She’s launched her own fragrances, jewelry, and clothing line. And she’s my sorra. It is my ABSOLUTE pleasure to bring out on your feet for REECE!”  
I stepped through the door as the gym went APE SHIT! Everyone was jumping up and down and screaming as I strolled to the front of the gym. Cell phone camera’s where going off. TV camera’s rushed in to get close-ups. Daddy came from somewhere and put a large, stuffed, frog, and some very, large, a bouquet of pink roses in my arms. People were screaming. Girls were crying. Guys were yelling out they loved me. It took a minute for all the hysteria to calm down.  
“Reece, Jennifer.”  
She addressed us both.

“Because of your generous donations and contributions over the years, it gives me the extreme honor to present you with this token of our appreciation.”  
She handed both of us cheering costumes and plaques and we both hugged her and each other. I looked at Jennifer to see if she wanted to speak, but she said  
“You got this.”  
I looked out at everybody in the gym and although throughout the course of Eye Candy’s career I had presented with countless awards, for the first time I found myself at a loss of words. It took me a minute to gather my thoughts.  
“Wow! You have *no* idea what this means to me. I’ve been presented with *a lot* of awards over the years, but I think this one by far means the most to me. It really didn’t seem like that long ago, when I was standing here on this very court all those years when I had first made the squad. And it’s the craziest thing because when I graduated, I swore when I got out of this place they would *never* see my fine ass again. But standing here right now it just feels like.. I’m home. And I wanna thank all you guys for supporting Eye Candy and buying our cds and downloading our music and going out to see our movies and keeping our videos and songs in rotation. And selling out our shows. I love you guys!”  
I said sincerely and felt emotions rush me. Everyone was screaming again. My eyes misted up just a teeny bit.  
“WE LOVE YOU REECE!”  
Someone yelled.  
“I love you too!”  
Everyone cheered.  
“And I wanted to invite you all out Saturday to the Boutwell where I’m hosting a fashion show in honor of the 12th anniversary of my mom’s passing. It’ll be at 1 PM and all proceeds will go to Over the Mountain which is an aviation school here in Birmingham. As you know all know my mom died in a plane crash on September the 13th and while I know that not all accidents can be prevented, I just wanted to do everything I could to make sure that the best education is given to future pilots so when faced with bad conditions they’ll make smarter decisions.”  
This got more applause and whistles. I saw my Dad nod.  
“Well, I’m not the one to do a whole lot of talking so I hope I’ll see you all there. We’re about to bring out the rest of the squad and Jen and I are gonna lead em in a routine. I hope they can keep up. RAMS good luck in the tournament. Go out there and KICK THEY ASSES!”  
The rest of the squad then rushed onto the floor. Thankfully I saw Tasha with them. I turned to Jen.  
“You ready.”  
“I was *born* ready!”  
“Alright let’s show em how it’s done.”  
She grinned and we joined the rest of the squad on the floor and waited for the music to cue.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here Comes Halloween! This is a new introduction to a character that will only be played in Birmingham Alabama. Her name is Halloween Woodfin or Hallie as she likes to call herself.

Halloween's Intro  
Here Comes Halloween  
*A little bit about Halloween as she wasn’t a character in Beyond. Halloween is a Latin-American girl that’s a senior at Ramsey High School. When she’s first introduced here, she’s a junior. Later in the story, she’s a senior in the new Beyond. Halloween is her real name, but she’s shortened it to Hallie. Her mother is a Wiccan and her Father is the mayor of the city. So, she’s pretty spoiled. She’ll pout and her Father will cave to her wishes every time. A tactic she’s very much perfected over the years with not only him but her classmates. This does NOT work on her teachers. She’s also the most popular girl in her class. Possibly maybe at Ramsey period. In looks Halloween is gorgeous. She has long, dark, hair, almond-shaped eyes, and a curvaceous figure (plenty on top and plenty in back-and it’s hers-) *inherited from her mother*. She can be a little vain (and loves taking selfies of herself on IG.) She’s what’s known as an “Instagram model” (constantly taking pics and hoping to get noticed by someone famous in their DMS). She tends to like to brag about who she knows through her Dad’s connections. Halloween though is actually smart (as she’d have to be to get into Ramsey). She excels in figures (naturally) and is in the most advanced math programs there. The only course that she doesn’t really interest her (although she makes passing grades in it) is English (because she’s slightly impatient and just does not like to read books). Halloween is a bit of a play-girl (and a party girl). She gets bored quickly and picks up and drops (people and interest) as fast as the days change to weeks. She’s bi-sexual so she’s had a string of boyfriends and girlfriends (never staying with one longer than a couple of months if that). She’s definitely not someone you want to think about getting serious with and she tends not to let herself get emotionally tied down with anyone. But guys and girls flock to her because once she has her sights on you she’ll make you feel like you are everything (and lavish you with her time, attention, and expensive tokens of her affection). She can be addictive (and this is definitely not good when she’s moved on but her victims can’t seem to shake her out of their system). Halloween was born on October 31st (the day she’s named after). Although if it comes up and her classmates joke about her mother arriving at the school in weird Goth like attire, she’ll pretend to be annoyed and talk about her Mother (as long as she’s in front of other students), but secretly because of her Mother and Grandmother Halloween does celebrate the Sabbaths and has dabbled in spell work. She also keeps a hidden grimoire in a loose, floorboard, in her closet. Sometimes she will even wear either moon, stars, or the pentagram in her jewelry. (If she wanted, she could own being a Wiccan and possibly have her classmates converting because of the influence she has, but because she’s a teenager she doesn’t want to do something too different). She has a step-brother that in this point of the story is a senior and about to graduate. She and he have a love-hate relationship. He loves his sister, and is quick to protect her but doesn’t particularly care for her ways. He tends to see her as a user (although unknowingly to his own self he tends to let her use him too). Halloween is a cheerleader at Ramsey as well as on the Birmingham dance team (The Slayers) which her mother is over. She’s also the president of her class. She has a lively personality and can make friends with anyone. But on the flip side, she can also tend to have a smart mouth and an attitude. You just never know which Halley you’re gonna get on any given day. She’s attracted to the “newest thing” whatever that might be (clothes, shoes, technology) and she won’t stop until it’s hers. There’s nothing she loves more than a challenge.


	7. Chapter 7

Halloween:   
I Run This City  
I was getting ready for the Pep Rally and lacing up my favorite, purple, sneakers, when some of the other girls on the squad surrounded me.  
“Alright! Are yal ready to do this? Yal know the steps. Yal know the routine. We’ve been over it over and over and over and over. So, let’s just get out there and DO IT!”  
I told them. It was my job as their captain to give them a lil pep talk. But actually, there wasn’t any reason because (snorts)- we ARE the best in the state (academics and sports). And with my brother leading the team well I had no doubts we’d win that tournament. That trophy was OURS! They might as well just hand it over to us now so we could make room for another one in the case. Everything we did we did BIG and to prove the point, we had one of *the* baddest bitches in the country performing with us. So, you know it’s gone be lit as fuck. At first, my co-captain Brit was a little concerned about her being able to keep up. At Top Golf, over drinks later in the week one evening she’d told me.  
“You know she hasn’t been on our squad since 2010. It’s changed and we’ve worked hard to get this squad where it needs to be. You know we do more than shake our asses, jump up and down, and look cute in our uniforms.”  
I’d nodded sipped my tropical mai tai and thought about that for a minute. I mean I didn’t doubt she couldn’t get the dance moves down. The moves she did in those videos were so damn HOT! And she did them effortlessly. Just watching the way her body moves sometimes just mm. What I wouldn’t do to watch her body move like that for me in nothing but some heels. DAMN her body is BANGING! She could be wifey. She so fucking PHOINE!   
But the jumps we had to do was another story. The splits we had to do were another story. The cartwheels we had to do yet another story. So, I made a vow then that I would work with her day and night if I had to (to) make it all came back. I’d even found some old, videos, in the archives of games from when she was here (for my own personal research). The first day was a lil ... rough.   
I know she probably wanted to kick my ass. I keep making her do the jumps over and over and over and over. At same time I was telling her what she needed to be doing different. I bet I sounded like a drill Sargent. It wasn’t what the kind of work out I wanted to be putting her through (trust and believe me). But that’s just how I do my squad. I won’t settle for *anything* less than perfection from my girls. Not only do I expect that from them, I do from myself when I do a floor show for our games.  
And we didn’t have that much time. And what I LOVED is she just gritted her teeth and took my shit until she got it right. We were in the gym till after-dark just the two of us working on the routine till we were all sweaty and tired. No, I was good. I didn’t try anything. I just watched her silently and kept my wild thoughts to myself. By Thursday night I knew she was gonna do fine.  
Brit raised her eyebrows as the rest of the squad was heading out to the gym, one rushed in. One that I wasn’t expecting to join us for this show. She gave me a look like well isn’t that nice.  
“She’ll probably be gone by next week.”  
I murmured. Eyeing her from the back lazily and staring at her as she undressed.  
“That’s not what I heard.”  
She mumbled.  
“What did you hear?”  
I asked, not taking my eyes off how fat she looked from the back in those sexy, red, thongs. Red was my favorite color.   
“I heard she took the entrance exam today and scored so high she’d be in our class. She can’t be no more than 13.”  
“I had a class with her. She made all perfect scores on her assignments.”  
I was slightly impressed. No one could come close to me when it came to figures. But this new girl just comes in and blows all the teacher’s minds. So I decided to see where her head was at.  
“She is a little young, but she’s mature for her age.”  
You could just see in her eyes she’d lived that hard knock life. Brit sighed.  
“Yeah, but if she gets in what? Are we expected to just bow down to her because she’s Reece’s kid? You see how easy it was for her to be a part of the routine. What next? What if Reece decides she wants her to be the captain. You know Principal is gonna wanna keep one of our biggest contributors happy.”  
“She can try.”  
I said nonchalantly. My position on this squad wasn’t going anywhere. I don’t care who the hell new girl’s kid was. She was no threat to *me* so it wasn’t even worth my time to get worked up about it. Besides I had *ways* of keeping people off this squad (and school) that didn’t belong. I smiled.  
“What are you thinking?”  
Brit asked slyly. Brit knew me too well. We’d been Freindemies since kindergarten. Always competing for the top grades, the best parties, the hottest boys -and girls-.   
“I know that look.”  
“All I’m *thinking* is we need to out there and murder this pep-rally. Come on! We have to open.”  
I started toward the door. She grabbed my arm.  
“Not so fast. You know you don’t fool me, girl. I know you’ve been checking her out. And you better watch yourself because Royal won’t like that.”  
Royal was our very own Ram *celebrity* on the court, on the track, on the diamond. He mastered any sport he touched. We’d been seeing each other for a few months now (which was longer than I’d ever let myself be tied down to anyone). At first it was a rush. Royal’s dad had been something of an athlete back in his day and played for the NBA, and because of that his Dad could still get tickets to a lot of the games because he was still cool with some of the old heads.   
That meant *I* got to go to a lot of out of town games and meet a lot of the players. And not just for me. I always made sure to hook my brother up and my friends. So, dating Royal had (had) it’s advantages. It was even cool having him lavish expensive gifts on me. I mean don’t get me wrong Royal is a nice guy.  
He’s the kind of boyfriend *any* girl would love to have! In looks, he’s a 10, wavy blond hair, brown eyes, ridiculous body from all the hours he puts in at the gym. And most importantly he’s crazy about me and will do whatever I say. And I *do* feel bad about it because he deserves a girl that’s gonna be 100 percent committed and faithful to him. That just is NOT me! And I have tried to tell him this several times. But once they get a taste of this.   
But a bad bitch like me, I have to have my fun. But I don’t know he thinks one day I’m just gonna wake up and that will be the day I don’t see anyone else but him. Right! I’ ma let him have his fantasies. I rolled my eyes.  
“*Royal* doesn’t own me.”  
I’d let him hit a couple of times, and now he’s so sprung. My phone was in my locker, but if I looked it right now, I’d be full of I love you emojis. He’d even had a dozen red roses delivered to my homeroom this morning. And don’t think I don’t know that Brit has been *dying* to get in his pants, and it would make her day to just *accidentally* let slip I have a new conquest. Then she’d be in his ear talking bout how I’m no good for him so she can just * slide* her way in. I’m not new to these games these bitches play up here at Ramsey. I don’t trust *any* of them that be all up in my face complimenting me and trying to be close to me like they know me. It all just amuses me honestly. Brit ain’t no different. If she wanted him, don’t play games bitch! Take him if you think you can! Shoot yo shoot!  
“I need something *new*.”  
I considered as I continued to look at Tasha to determine if she had *IT*, cause I don’t just get with any ol body. I had STANDARDS! She was... pretty in the face. I usually like bad bitches with a body that rivaled (or was more than) my own. I say she was about a B cup. But she had potential. I could train her to be who I needed her to be.  
“Well, you better hurry. You said she’s leaving next week. In fact,”  
Britt grinned mischievously.  
“I’ll make a bet with you.”  
A bet? I raised my eyebrows curiously. This sounded interesting.  
“I bet you can’t hit that before she leaves to go back to LA.”  
She betted *I* couldn’t hit that before she went back to LA? Did she forget who she was talking to? I’d have that little girl turned the hell out before the day was over. Well I mean maybe not so little...   
“Please! I thought you were actually going to give me a *challenge*.”  
Brit snorted.  
“Reece would probably kick your ASS!”  
“She’s welcome to join in if she wants.”  
I answered lazily. It wouldn’t be the first time I had two. I walked over to Tasha who was just stepping into her skirt. I didn’t say anything at first. She felt my presence a little too close to her space and jumped. She saw me and relaxed a little.   
We’d exchanged a few words in a couple of my classes. Mostly it had been about my dance team (The Slayers) who she’d heard about from her Grandfather (and if that man was a Grandfather, I’d never seen one look like THAT). I could see myself having her whole damn family  
“You scared me. Hey. I’m sorry I’m late. I went to this step-show last night and I over-slept.”  
Now normally I wouldn’t have let that shit go. I would have chewed her ass out. I wish one of my squad would bust-up in the locker room giving me excuses. Like what the hell am I gonna do with those? If we have a rally I don’t care if your Daddy just died. You better be your ass here at 1:00 in line and ready to jump, and scream, and yell till *I* dismiss you afterward. And I’m not gonna lie, a little irritation did try to break through, but I stuffed it down. Instead, I smiled and said softly.  
“Hey. It’s all good. I mean you were spending time with your *family*. You probably won’t be here that much longer so you probably want to spend as much time with him as you can.”  
Her face seemed to change and she got a little snappish.  
“Yeah.”  
Did she just get an attitude with me? I didn’t say anything. I started to turn around and walk out the door and leave her to handle that. She immediately corrected herself.  
“My bad. I ain’t mean to sound like that. I was just ... hoping they’d let me stick around.”  
Why in the hell would she want to stick around *here* in Bham and she lived in LA? The one’s here our age were trying to get the hell outta this place. Birmingham Alabama was so boring it wasn’t even funny. We couldn’t have shit for someone acting up and it getting shut down. Everyone just ended up going to Atlanta where the real fun was. She and Reece probably lived out in Beverly Hills somewhere in a mansion and got invited to all the biggest events. But she didn’t comment further and I didn’t push. I touched her arm.  
“I don’t know why you’d wanna stick around here. It’s not all that. But if you think it would help, I could talk to Reece. I kinda have a way with people.”  
“What would you say?”  
“I’d tell her what an asset you’d be to the school. I heard you passed the entrance exam. Congratulations!”  
“How’d you hear that. I just took it the other day.”  
I said casually.  
“There’s not a lot of things that go on around here I don’t know about. Then I’d tell her you *belong* on the squad and my dance team from what I’ve see. And I’d love to be the one to take care of you personally.”  
I moved a little closer subtly to Tasha but she was picking up on it. She just shrugged.  
“Yeah ok. Good luck with that. I can hardly talk to her. She’s never around. And I can protect myself.”  
“Look I’ll talk to her after the pep rally, but we need to get out there. It’s time.”  
“Ok.”  
“Are you nervous? Because if you are you shouldn’t be. You brought LIFE into that dead, ass, routine Brit picked.”  
“Isn’t she a friend of yours.”  
I made a face.  
“Please. We’re cool and all, but I don’t put nothing past these bitches up here. If I turn my back, she’ll probably stab me in and try to take my spot. It’s every man for himself here. But let’s go. We can talk later. A lot of us are gonna hang out at Top Golf after the rally. We all get to go home after the pep rally.”  
“Top Golf?  
Tasha was probably imagining old, gray-haired, Granddaddies with those funny plaid hats and knee-length pants.”  
“It’s cooler than it sounds, trust me. You’ll really like and I want you to hang out with me.”  
“Ok.”  
She said looking somewhat taken aback. I took her hand and said sweetly.  
“I really like you, Tasha. I really hope you get to stay because I really want us to be friends. It may look like I have a lot of friends, but I never really know who I can trust because of who my father is.”  
I *accidentally* on purpose brushed my twin D’s against her as I went to straighten her long, curly, ponytail and led her by the hand out where I could hear the Principal call out. Tasha blinked. I could almost hear her thinking is she trying to get up on me or something. She just looked like she never had a real bitch in her life to do the things I could do to her. But would she be down for it? She stepped back a little.   
“And to show you I’m sincere, I have something for you?”  
Tasha looked at me wearily.  
“You have something for me?”  
“It’s a friendship gift.”  
“You don’t. have to get me anything.”  
She said hesitantly.  
“But I want too. Please it would hurt my feelings if you don’t accept it.”  
I turned to my locker, spun the dial, and practically had an avalanche hit me as all my stuff toppled out. I really needed to clean that out. But I found Royal’s varsity jacket hanging up neatly and reached inside one of the pockets.   
“Hold out your arm.”  
I told her. When she did, I slipped a bracelet on her arm.  
“I know it doesn’t match but it’s Aventurine.”  
“Aventurine?”  
“It’s a lucky crystal. I always hold in in my hand when we have a game, or I take a test, or I have a project. It calms me down a little bit. Why are you looking like that?”  
I asked quickly. It always put me a little on edge because if the kids up here knew about what I was into. What my Mother and Grandma were into. All they know is she wears funny clothes and jewelry. They just think she’s a little eccentric or “Goth”. They definitely wouldn’t understand. But did Tasha know? I didn’t think just being into crystals would give it away.  
“I don’t know. When girl’s usually give me something it means they’re gonna lie and say I stole it and try to frame me to a teacher or something.”  
I shook my head and took her hand and pulled her toward the door.  
“Come on! I don’t like not being on time.”  
Tasha just followed me out the door and into the gym. Seeing all the crowd we all rushed out into the gym and started with a cheer that I made up called “On Your Feet”. That really got the crowd hyped.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back at home, Kenneth and Reece discuss Tasha's future/

Shereece:  
The Future  
I was sitting at the table in my Dad’s kitchen with a bottle of wine (and a glass) sitting in front of me sipping. At least I’d made it through today. The honorary uniform I was presented with was slung over the chair. I’d forgotten how hard and how strenuous those jumps and flips were. I must be getting old. Then I snorted yeah right. I still worked it and rocked the hell out of that little uniform just like back in the day. I was still the shit! Even though my body was sore in place I ain’t know I had. Damn a nice, STRONG, pair of arms would be good rubbing me down right now.I started to scroll through my contacts but even though I saw a few prospects that I had on standby, they weren't nowhere near where I was. And there was absolutely NO ONE in this damn place I wanted to hook up with. So I put my phone down.  
“HEY!”  
My Dad walked in and pulled up a chair across from me.  
“YOU DID THAT! And I couldn’t be prouder of both my girls! Yal was the best damn ones on that team.”  
I looked at my Dad straight in the eye tiredly.  
“I ain’t doing that no more!”  
“That’s ok. I got it all on my phone. And my grandbaby. Did you *see* her out there? Did you *see* my grandbaby SLAY on that floor? She can DANCE!”  
“Yeah. She aiight.”  
“And my other baby. Did you choreograph that routine?”  
“Most of it was her.”  
“I bet they just *loved* that. They didn’t start nothing with her did they?”  
"I was there."  
They really didn’t want nun of me and they started shit with her, they started shit with me. I would drag all them chicks across that gym with all that hair.  
“Do you really have to take her back tomorrow? Can’t you just let her stay another week? You could talk to Aja and her teachers. She told me she’s been keeping up with the classes.”  
I leaned back in my chair.  
“Has anyone ever told you have a white knight complex?”  
“Hey what can I say? I miss having someone to spoil. It’s been a *long* time!”  
“The principal talked to me after the pep rally today.”  
“She wasn’t in any trouble, was she?”  
He said with a concerned look on his face. I shook my head.  
“She took the entrance exam this morning. Not only did she pass, but she tested way past the grade level she’s in. She could start as a junior next semester if she wanted to.”  
“She passed! I knew she could do it.”  
I looked at him eyebrows raised.  
“You knew about this?”  
“She wanted it to be a surprise. I told her I wouldn’t say anything. She just wanted you to be proud of her.”  
I didn’t say anything because I knew where this was leading.  
“Well, aren’t you?”  
I sighed. I was *not* ready! I’d just meet this little girl a few weeks ago. I mean yeah I was gonna eventually give her a job, but wasn’t that enough? I didn’t really know anything about her. It wasn’t on me to be her parent and make sure she got educated. She *had* to have a mother? Or maybe not another voice in my head said. She’s an *employee* if anything another voice said. You *really* shouldn’t be getting too attached. Yeah, cause that *never* works out.   
“She seems to really want to stay?”  
Dad said. Not helping.  
“I know you want to keep her, but I’m not her mother. I’m not even her guardian. I don’t have permission to just transfer her out of the school she’s in. She wasn’t even supposed to be here this long. I think the only reason the lady over her school let me pull her for a week is because of my status and because she’s a fan and I promised free tickets to my next concert. She’s not gonna let me just take her.”  
“You could speak to her parents. Tell them this will be a good opportunity for her, tell her about the job you offered her and how it’ll be a good learning experience. And you know I got your back. I’ll help you. I’ll take her to school. Pick her up. Whatever you need.”  
“How am I suppose to do that and she won’t even tell me *who* the hell they are?”  
“You found *her* and that iPod didn’t you? Look all you can do is try.”  
“But if she doesn’t want to talk to them.”  
“Then *you*’ll just have to find them and do the talking. And we both know that what you want you get! Not even a thang!”  
I considered it. Since when did I ever quit a challenge and this was a BIG one.  
“I’d have to find someplace for us to live.”  
“You can both stay with me until you find a place.”  
“I haven’t lived at home since I was 17.”  
I said in amusement. Pops was cool and all but no that wasn’t gonna work. Plus she was *my* responsibility. I knew Dad had his own life now.  
“Please. I want to help. Let me help. I can make a call. My Frat brother sells real estate. He can hook yal up.”  
“Ok.”  
“He’s single too.”  
I rolled my eyes.  
“What’s wrong with him?”  
“See. Why something gotta be *wrong* with him? He went through a divorce a couple of years ago, and it took him a little while but I think he’s ready to get back out there. He doesn’t get out a lot. I have to drag him out of his place. He has a nice, place, by the way. It’s in Hoover. No kids.”  
“I wish him the best.”  
I knew how hard it could be meeting people here. Why do you think I moved?  
“Come on. Give him a chance. Once you see him I think you’ll change your mind. I don’t go around judging dudes or nothing, but even *I* think the brother is attractive.”  
“Maybe.”  
I said non-committedly.  
“You’ll have to come home you know? You said you NEVER wanted to live here again! Raising a teenager is a full-time job and you don’t really like to stay still. What about singing? The series?”  
I frowned and picked up my phone. Checked out the nearest studio location. Surprisingly a few popped up. Hmm. Since when did the Boutwell Auditorium have a studio. I’d been gone too long. I showed the phone to my Dad.  
“Then it was cool making the album and I still plan to promote it, but I think I need a break for a minute from recording. Maybe I can do something here. I don’t know you said I influence all these people. Maybe I can try to get a television show here that let’s artist here audition and work with me or other producers or something. Local artists I mean.”  
Dad smiled.  
“That would be cool.”  
“Stubbard doesn’t have to be the only one we known for.” (Reuben Stoddard)  
“True!”  
Dad nodded in agreement.  
“Then I can work with her too. And that’ll also give me time to work on the series. A lot of it will be shoot here and maybe it’ll motivate me being here again to actually sit down and start this thing.”  
“How will you get her to school?”  
“I guess I’ll have to take her or she can ride the bus.”  
“I can pick her up. I can take my break at 3:00.”  
“That will work.”  
“When she gets old enough I can give her one of my old cars. Or maybe I can get her a car of her own.”  
“There you go spoiling her again. Your gonna give her a ego before she even gets here."  
“I just think life gave her a rough hand and she deserves better. She deserves to have some good things for a change. She’s special.”  
“You can’t let her get you too spellbound. I told you she’s slick.”  
“I don’t think so. Do you know when I brought her to my office? I purposely left my Apple watch on my desk and when I got back she gave it to me and told me Paw Paw you forgot your watch.”  
I raised my eyebrows Paw Paw We?  
“Oh for *you* she’s the perfect, little, angel.”  
I snorted.  
“You just have to let her see that you trust her. That’s all. She’s trying.”  
“Dad?”  
“Yeah?”  
“How long did it take for you to adopt Cara?”  
Dad sighed and loosened his tie.  
“Long enough.”  
At the time, I wasn’t trying to hear nothing about sharing *my* Daddy. I was extremely jealous and had acted like the biggest brat. I purposely had somewhere else to be whenever the subject of her being my sister came up. I mean by this point Cara and I were tight and everything. We ate together at lunch, hung out after school watching video’s and arguing over which one got Dalvin and which one got Devante as their man, and on the weekends kick it at the Valley Skate Rink after hours, but I could not *stand* how close she and her were getting. I didn’t understand why he needed another daughter when I was all he could ever need in a daughter: beautiful, talented, smart, fly.  
“The court case itself took over a year. But by that time your sister was old enough to have a say in things. That woman put up a NASTY fight. She even insinuated that I had made sexual advances.”  
“LIES!”  
I snapped. How *dare* she tried to insinuate my Daddy was some kind of adolescent molester.  
“I never saw so many crocodile tears as to when we got in that courtroom and she took the stand. So if you're thinking about going in the same direction I did.”  
He shook his head.  
“Just be prepared. Getting your sister with us was a LONG, HARD, BATTLE. You said you don’t know anything about her family. You *may* be able to convince them to let her stay here but they *might* just fight you on it.”  
“How much can they really care about if she’s been living at a shelter?”  
I said bitterly.  
“You’d be surprised at what people will try. All I’m saying is be prepared.”  
“I don’t even know why she’d *want* to live here. I mean I know you love it here but..”  
“I think she just wants to start over someplace new. You should know what that’s like. You might think the Ham is lame, but to her, it’s a chance to reinvent herself, go to a new school, meet some new people, get involved with some different activities. Maybe get out from under all those kids at Haven House who none of them she told me she’s really close to. And then get away from whatever happened to at home that she keeps hidden. Can you see the appeal?”  
I nodded. I did feel that way myself when I left for college all those years ago.  
“And I think that’s a good thing. I think being here will be good for her. We can give her a *family*. Did you see how surprised she looked when I showed up? I’m not trying to brag but I think seeing me made her dance even better. But I’m just saying.”  
He said in a yeah-I’m all that-kinda way. I rolled my eyes.  
“Ain’t nobody trying to impress you. Don’t flatter yourself.”  
He just laughed.  
“Well, I’m exhausted. I’m about to go upstairs and soak in the jacuzzi for a little.”  
I stood up.  
“Where is she? I was gonna go take yal out to eat tonight to celebrate, or I can cook. Do you know what her favorite thing is?”  
“I think some of the girls on the squad asked her to go to Top Golf with them? I don't know. Some girl named Halloween."  
“Halloween? Well, that’s a new one. She doesn’t have a black cat does she?”  
“Who knows.”  
Kids from this millennium were weird as hell to me.  
“I think she wants to get all up under cheerleading uniform."  
“What?”  
“When she came over to ask me, I saw her eyes on her uh from the back like I want that.”  
Then she’d looked at me looking at her and she smiled at me and gave *me* a look."  
“So, you mean to tell me it’s just little boys Ima have to be on my guard over.”  
“Apparently not. Anyway, she didn't go. She's in her room."  
Dad gave me this look of disbelief.  
"What! Why you looking at me like that."  
"She's in her room?"  
"Well *my* room, but what?"  
I was too tired to play guessing games and try to figure out what his problem was with me now.  
"Did you give her some money to go?"  
"She didn't ask for any?"  
Dad just shook his head at me and got up.  
“The reason she's in her room is because she probably didn't have the *money* to go.”  
"Right."  
I mumbled. Shelter for runaways. I forgot for a minute. Maybe I should go upstairs and offer to drop her off at Top Golf and give her at least 50.00. How much was it even to get in Top Golf? I had no idea what the prices were to go place here these days. Hell where was my tote any way? I hope I hadn't left it at school. No, it's probably in Dad's car (I was driving one of his while I was home) and I really didn't feel like going back to get it. Oh well, he looked like he had it under control so I'd let him handle that. I headed upstairs to the master bathroom to relax to some slow RNB, bubbles, and nice bottle champagne.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara prepares to go to Birmingham to attend the fashion show held in honor of her adopted mother Bianca and discovers one of many of Darcie Manor's hidden secrets.

Cara  
Secrets and Revelations  
I called for Jacqui to wrap and she took off her headphones.  
“Nice work. I think we can stop there for today. I have to get ready for this trip home.”  
“When you leaving?”  
She asked picking up one of my notebooks.  
“Uh. I’ll probably leave tomorrow night since it’ll take a day and 5 hours to get there.”  
“So, you’re going by yourself?”  
Jacqui thought she was slick trying to pump me to see if she could find out if I was bringing my “new friend”. But there was someone I was thinking of asking to come along and keep me company.  
“Maybe. Maybe not.”  
“Can I come?”  
She asked plopping herself down on one of the couches in Anthony’s personal studio at Crown Studios.  
“You have school.”  
I reminded her. She shrugged like this wasn’t a thing.  
“I can miss a few days.”  
“You just wanna get out of that project you have due. Nice try!”  
“Can’t I just want to spend time with my new auntie other than in *here*?”  
I snorted.  
“Oh, you wanna spend *time* with me? Funny since I’m not on the screen of your phone.”  
I said in sarcasm. Jacqui rolled her eyes.  
“I *have* to keep my social prescience relevant. You know that.”  
She mumbled.  
“So why you going back home anyway?”  
“I have to go to this fashion show thing for my Mom.”  
I said tiredly, The thought of dressing up for this thing and wearing a gown and heels and makeup really didn’t do anything for me. But it was important to Reece and Daddy so. Jacqui raised her eyebrows as she flipped through my black notebook.  
“Thought you couldn’t stand her.”  
“Not *that* mom. The other one. And I can’t. I wouldn’t be going myself if it wasn’t for that.”  
My relationship with Bianca had been ...rocky at first. I just always got the sense that she was resentful of me, and thought that *NOONE* should take the place of her and Reece’s place in Kenneth’s life. Like Reece should be his one and ONLY priority other than herself. I just never really felt like we connected all that much. I wasn’t interested in high fashion or modeling or living a life of luxury or any other of the things that she seemed to value. But I think before she died I was starting to find a common interest with her about her travels. I always did dream of getting out of the Ham and seeing what else there was to life. And I could tell she felt stifled being there too. You could just see it in her eyes that she’d rather be anywhere else (which was why whenever she got a chance she was on the first flight out). Couldn’t really say I blamed her much for it. I’d have done the same.  
Besides since when do you care about fashion.”  
Jacqui gave me this look like did you forget who my mom is, and don’t I look like I’m into fashion. I gave her outfit a glance. Stylishly ripped jeans, white mid-baring top, with her JPHIJ jacket that she’d worn at Kimber’s show over it. Her hair was long, loose, curly, and wild. How in the hell did her hair keep changing up from one day to the next?  
“Right. How could I forget?”  
“Unless you don’t *want* me to go.”  
She teased.  
“Because you planning on doing *something* else you don’t want me to *see*?”  
I could almost hear her thinking hmm. Maybe her girlfriend is back in Bham.  
“I tell you what, If your Mom and Dad say it’s cool then you can come.”  
Anthony might, but I knew for damn sure Shana wasn’t gonna let Jacqui miss school for a fashion show.  
“I don’t wanna ask her.”  
Thought not.  
“I kinda lost something and I haven’t told her yet. She’s gonna pissed. That reminds me. Do you think you can take me by GEM-TV?”  
“You *kinda* lost something?”  
I raised my eyebrows.  
“Yeah, but you can’t tell Mom if I tell you. You have to promise.”  
“What did you lose?”  
“Her Jemstar?”  
“Her what?”  
“You know the Jemstars? All the original Holograms have them. I know you’ve seen them. Jem’s earrings. Kimber’s necklace. Aja’s ring and mom’s bracelet. I think my Grand-dad gave them to them or something.”  
“Oh. Yeah.”  
I did and didn’t because well like I said fashion and jewelry really isn’t really my thing. My jewelry day to day might be silver rings, necklace, and earrings. Plain, simple, non-fussy.  
“Anyway, I think they all have magic powers or something?”  
“Magic powers? Yeah. You been watching Charmed too much.”  
I snorted. Jacqui gave me this look like I can’t believe you don’t *get* it.  
“HOLOGRAMS? Why do you think they call themselves that? Go back and watch their old videos. I mean Daddy’s good with special effects and Video, but. Did you even think about *why* people are so bent around them to get to this *super* computer? I haven’t seen it personally but I’ve heard things. I think it use to be at the Starlight Mansion. I use to try to look for it but I never found it. They probably moved it by now. I know it’s not here.”  
“Riight. And Jem is really Jerrica Benton wearing a pink wig and contacts.”  
I said in sarcasm.  
“Come ON! *You* can’t really believe all that bs at the wedding?”  
“If you don’t believe me.”  
She pulled up something on her phone and handed it to me. It was a clip of her performance on the show.  
“Damn, I looked SNATCHED! ! No wonder that boy was all on me.”  
She muttered.  
“But Here. Watch. See that?”  
She paused on the effects while she was singing Emoji. I shrugged.  
“It’s just effects. Rio could have done those.”  
“I thought that too at first, but then I thought about it. See the bracelet was on my arm.”  
“Oh, so the *bracelet* did it. Cause that makes PERFECT sense!”  
“My *Grandfather* was a scientific GENIUS!! It’s not a surprise that looks AND brains run in our family.”  
She said smugly. I considered this. Holograms weren’t necessarily so absurd. There had been projections of Pac performing in concert.  
“So, do you think you just could have maybe dropped it?”  
Jacqui shook her head.  
“I didn’t take it off my arm all night. I think someone STOLE it.”  
“But you just said you didn’t take it off your arm all night. Wouldn’t you have felt it?”  
Jacqui said.  
“You have NO idea of all the people my mom and aunties have come up against over the years. I’m talking INTERNATIONAL, jewel, thieves. I can tell you stores that were WAY before your time at Starlight. Some of em even kidnapped *me*.”  
“They did?”  
“It was years ago but yeah. Mom told me while we were in Orlando. But it is *me*, My net worth alone is billions!”  
“So you think one of the Hologram’s old nemesis were at Kimber’s show to get *you*?”  
“Well not *me* but mom’s bracelet. It’s been quiet now for some years, but it wouldn’t surprise me. Maybe Aja’s mother in law dug herself back out of whatever grave she ought to have her old ass buried in right now. You know she was one of the ones behind having me snatched right? Or maybe it was the pycho one that tried to steal Jem’s face. Or maybe they just want *me* again”  
“Yeah well. I seriously doubt that. They’d probably pay *us* to take you back.”  
Just that quickly she switched her interest from her conspiracy theories to one of my open notebooks.  
“So, what’s this?”  
“Something I’ve been working on.”  
“Like what?”  
“Reece wants us to do a biopic.”  
“Your gonna write it?”  
“My part in it.”  
Well, who the hell was I kidding? I’d probably end up writing hers too.  
“That’ll be hot? So yal having auditions?”  
“Not yet. Well not that I know of. Eventually. Maybe in the next 6 months.”  
“So yal ain’t gone nobody in mind yet?”  
“I think she might. Some girl she meet at the mall.”  
Jacqui frowned.  
“Did this girl just happen to be at my show?”  
“Uh.”  
I tried to think, but there were too many damn people on stage.  
“She was dancing on my set next to Reece?”  
She pulled her phone out and showed me a clip of her performance. I glanced at the screen.  
“Yeah ok. Could. I mean I haven’t really met her, but that would make sense.”  
I could definitely see the resemblance.  
“I wanna audition.”  
Jacqui said firmly.  
“You wanna play Reece?”  
“No. You.”  
I gave her a look.  
“I mean come on Aunty. Who can play you better than me? We kin.”  
I looked at Jacqui. How to say this?”  
“Ok, but you don’t *exactly* look like me.”  
Pointing out the obvious difference, Jacqui’s skin was paper-brown, mine was dark brown.  
“Have you seen Gemini Man? If they can age Will Smith, they can make me dark-skinned. Then do you remember that old movie with Eddie Murphey? They made him white. They made the Wayans brother’s white in White Chicks.”  
“Well true.”  
“If they can do that then they can use makeup to make me dark-skinned.”  
“Yeah, but.”  
Jacqui didn’t exactly have my deep voice either. Not that I haven’t seen MANY a movie where the actor’s picked to play the real-life person was NOWHERE near what the actual person looked like. Just look how they butchered the Liyah story. Even Shana in the Jem movie was ALL WRONG! But I knew Reece would NOT settle for any of us misrepresented if she had to search all over the damn world to get our exact clones, she’d do that before she’d let someone portray us that didn’t look like us.  
“I can audition for you right now?”  
Jacqui hopped up from the coach. Of course, I wanted to encourage my niece to go after whatever she set her mind too but I had to keep it real and not give her false expectations.  
“I don’t have a script.”  
“I don’t need a script.”  
I shook my head in amusement. Jacqui held up a finger and found an instrumental version of one or old song then she jumped in and started to sing my part, dancing as she did in imitation of me in the video  
WHATS YO NAME  
CAUSE IM IMPRESSED  
CAN U TREAT ME GOOD? I WONT SETTLE FOR LESS  
YOU A HOTBOY, A ROCK BOY  
A FUN TOY, TOTE A GLOCK BOY  
WHERE U LIVE? IS IT BY YOURSELF?  
CAN I MOVE WIT YOU? DO U NEED SOME HELP?  
I COOK BOY ILL GIVE U MORE  
IM A FLY GIRL AND I LIKE THOSE  
HOT BOYS  
BABY YOU GOT WHAT I WANT  
SEE CAUSE YAL BE DRIVING LEXUS JEEPS  
AND THE BENZ JEEPS AND THOSE LINCOLN JEEPS  
NOTHING CHEAPER GOT THOSE PLATINUM VISAS  
Then Jacqui stopped singing and started to do the dance we did in the breakdown, step for step. I watched her closely as she wrapped up the song. I nodded in admiration.  
“Not bad!”  
“NOT BAD? You know I did that? I’ve watched ALL your videos. I know all your routines. All your parts. You might as well just give me the role now.”  
“But can you *act* tho?”  
I said in amusement.  
“You *know* I can. As a matter of fact, my Celebrations premiere for Legacy is right around the corner in a month. And Daddy’s gonna throw me a huge party. It’s gonna be lit! I got this.”  
“I don’t doubt it but it’s not all up to me. I can’t play favorites here.”  
I sighed. When word got out the place would be swamped with females wanting to play me, Reece, and Cinda. Jacqui might be good, but if someone was better.  
“But it’s your series?”  
“It’ll be a room full of people Jacq. Cinda will be there. Reece will be there -and we both know how hard she is when it comes to performance-. She’ll audition you harder than anyone. Then the director will be there.”  
“Is it Daddy? Cause if it is... I’m just saying.”  
“Well in that case.”  
I took my notebook off the chair, snapped it shut, and tossed it in my bookbag.  
“You don’t have anything to worry about I guess. But if you want me to take you to Gem TV we’d better get out of here.”  
Unfortunately, Shana’s bracelet wasn’t at the studio. We looked *everywhere*. Howard just happened to be there that day. He asked around and no-one had turned in a bracelet by that description. He even let us go to the sound stage where Kimber’s show was recorded and let us look around. He also let us look in the dressing room where Jacqui was before the show. He promised tho to call us if something turned up.  
I pulled up in front of Shana’s house. I knew Jacqui was stalling because she didn’t want to face Shana whose car was in the garage.  
“Don’t you want to come in and say hi for a minute. You can see Julius?”  
“I can’t. I still have packing to do. You might as well get it over with. Just tell her. She’s gonna find out sooner or later.”  
Jacqui’s eyes were on her screen again and she was typing fast.  
“I just need some time. There were these knock off’s Mom told me about a while back that were made in China that sold the Jemstars. Maybe they sold bracelets too. Maybe I can find a knock-off bracelet on eBay or Amazon and if she asks I can say I left the bracelet in my gym locker or at one of my girl’s houses. Then I can give her the knock off and she’ll just think when she tries to do magic with it it’s not working or something.”  
She mumbled.  
“Well good luck with that.”  
I wasn’t gonna dime on Jacq but I didn’t want any parts of that blow up either. A few minutes later I was pulling up too a little community housing area called Celebrations. Celebrations offered decent houses, and apartments for people with a lower income. Harlem told me he was staying there with a room-mate. Only I didn’t know until I got half=way up the steps to his apartment that his room-mate was a female.  
“Hey.”  
A tall, Latina, with long-dark, hair said coming down the steps just as I was going up.  
“Hey.”  
“Cara right?”  
“Yeah.”  
Even though it’s been a while, it never ceased to amaze me how wherever I went people automatically seemed to know me. I use to try to wear shades and a hat, but then I realized it really didn’t do any good. To their credit, most of my fans were respectful enough.  
“Brandy. I’m Harlem’s room-mate. He mentioned you might be stopping by. You know you look *so* much like my lady it’s eerie.  
“Ok. Is he around?”  
“Yeah, but if I were you I might wanna come back.”  
Then I heard her.  
“SO WHY THE HELL DIDN’T YOU ANSWER MY CALLS THE OTHER DAY. I CALLED YOU ABOUT FIVE TIMES!”  
“I was at an audition. I had to turn my phone off.”  
I heard him say calmly.  
“Did something happen?”  
“YEAH. SOMETHING HAPPENED. I WAS TRYING TO CALL YOUR ASS AND YOU DIDN’T ANSWER. I COULD HAVE BEEN OUT OF GAS ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD. I COULD HAVE HAD TO GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM.”  
Brandy rolled her eyes. I heard him say.  
“But you’re alright tho?”  
“AND WHAT AUDITION? YOU DIDN’T TELL ME YOU HAD AN AUDITION. I THOUGHT YOUR CAR WAS HAVING PROBLEMS. WHO TOOK YOU TO THE AUDITION?”  
“I got it looked at.”  
I noticed he avoided the question about who he went with.  
“Hey. I’m sorry. I should have told you. It was a spur thing. Some guys on campus told me about it, and I just did it.”  
“SO, IN OTHER WORDS YOU DIDN’T WANT ME TO KNOW ABOUT IT. WHAT AUDITION? AND WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR BAGS PACKED ARE YOU GOING SOMEWHERE? WHO YOU GOING SOMEWHERE WITH.”  
Brandy sighed.  
“Yeah. They’ve been like this *ALL* damn day. That’s why I had to get out of there, before she brought me into it. God, I hope I’m never that insecure! That’s why I just rather be by myself. Who needs all that drama. Harlem *did* try to hit on me when I first moved in, but I told him he wasn’t my type. I actually feel kinda sorry for her.”  
She snorted.  
“He has so many different ones coming in and out of there. But hey not my business. I try to be here as less as possible. I only come here to take a shower and change clothes. I’m at work half the time. You might wanna leave cause after she calms down they’re gonna go at it for a couple of hours.”  
I raised my eyebrows. A couple of HOURS? Brandy just looked smug and left. I decided to take Brandy’s advice and hit Harlem up later. I considered what to do next with my time. I needed to get my hair and nails done, but I definitely wasn’t trying to be in anybody’s hair salon for 2 or 3 hours. I scrolled through the collection of numbers in my phone over the years I’d gotten from different contacts from working at Starlight Music. Then I remembered one of Onyx did hair and nails. So, I called up Afrika  
“Yeah. I can hook you up. So what kind of style were you thinking of getting?”’”  
“Just something easy. Simple. It’s a fashion show.”  
“Ok. Do you have a picture? Or I can send you some styles and let you pick.”  
“That will work.”  
“Ok. Hang on a sec. Do you have the outfit so I can see what we’re working with?”  
I tried to think about what Reece has told me. Something about the outfit being there. Was it going to be at Dad’s or at the Boutwell? Or had she told me I needed to pick it up from somewhere else when I got there?  
“My sister has it. I think.”  
Had she told me there were several changes? Maybe I should just invite her to come with me too if different looks were gonna be involved. I know Reece had her “people” doing her hair and makeup.  
“It’s cool. I gotcho girl! I can come by after I get out of here. I have a couple of more. I’m doing braids now and then I have a sew-in. I should be out of here by 8:00. We can work it out from there. I’ma text you this style I saw that would look SNATCHED with the right makeup.”  
As I hung up with her, I thought I forgot to ask her did I need to buy anything. Oh well, I guess when she sent the picture shed tell me what I needed to buy. Or maybe she’d have the hair and I could just pay her back. I decided to head to the nail salon. I needed a manicure BAD! I’d been fooling around with my bike and my nails looked ROUGH. I saw Dad had called a few times and left messages. I’d talk to him once I got there. What happened in Orlando really wasn’t a conversation I was looking forward to having. I still woke up sometimes in my room at the Darcie in a cold sweat like it had *just* happened.  
I tried to let those thoughts fade as I saw Dad’s number flash on the screen again and after a few rings roll over to voice. I closed my eyes and stuck my hands under the electric dryer as the lady in front of me instructed. My mind flashed back. I was sitting in a similar nail and hair salon in Greenspring’s by George Ward Park. Harlem’s sister had given us the hookup. Reece and another girl we were cool with were all sitting in stations next to each other. It was the day of our junior prom. Reece was saying.  
“Come on! You can’t tell me you're not excited about *this*. It’s our prom night. We gone be the HOTTEST chicks up in that piece!”  
I shook my head.  
“It’s just a *dance*!”  
I said in amusement. Actually I *was* kind of excited, but I was too cool to show it. Reece rolled her eyes.  
“It’s not just *a* dance.”  
“You act like it’s a weekend in Vegas or something. It’s the same people we see Monday-Friday. Same gym. Same music we hear on 98.7 KISS FM and 95.7 JAMZ.”  
“Then if you think *you* could have done better you should have joined the prom committee and offered to DJ.”  
“Actually I *could* have, but I’ll pass.”  
Back then on the weekends I did have gigs sometimes DJing at the Platinum when it got slow and when there were big events like The Classics. Even though back then it was supposedly 21 and up club the owner always thought I was at least 21. It’s how I kept a little money. I still wasn’t comfortable always having to go to Kenneth even tho he had generously offered if there was ever anything I needed. But I definitely was not a *joiner*.Even  
“I think tonight is the night.”  
Reece announced boldly. I laughed.  
“Well, it’s about *time*. Do you think you’ve strung him along long enough? If you don’t give him some tonight someone else will.”  
She knew good and well who I meant. Reece rolled her eyes and mumbled.  
“She don’t want no more of this. I dare her to even so much as *look* in his direction tonight. I’ll drag her ass across the floor of the Boutwell with all that damn weave. Anyway, the limo will be there at 7:00 and I rented suites for us at the hottest 5-star hotels in the A. We’re leaving right after. I already got my bags packed.”  
“And Dad was cool with this?”  
Reece sighed.  
“I told him enough. I told him not to expect us back and that we’d rented a room. Just not *where* the room was. And then I don’t even really think he heard me. You know how he’s been.”  
I did know. It hadn’t been that long since. Dad sometimes didn’t even come home. He use to tell us he wasn’t coming home and that he’d be at the hospital all night covering the night shift. When he was home he was in his room with the door locked. I was worried.  
“Do you think we should .. say something?”  
“Like what?”  
Reece frowned.  
“We can’t bring her back. You don’t think *IM* mad as hell at that driver and the pilot that took her from me. I just wanna put they're asses in jail until he just *DIES* Mom had been involved in more than one accident that day. One on te way to the airport and or on her flight. If I was him I'd sue them for every damn penny they own and lock them up.\But I know I can’t just stop *living* and shut myself off to the world. Daddy will get through this. He just needs some time. But I guess we can do something. Take him somewhere to get him out that house and out this damn city. Maybe we can plan a vacation and just stay gone all summer. Hell make it permanent and live this ratchedness behind. Do you have any ideas of where he wants to go? He talks to you *a lot* more than he does me lately.”  
“Well if you were around sometimes maybe he would. “  
“Well excuse me for having a *life*.”  
She mumbled. It was typical Shereece and I banter. We were always getting in little digs at each other. Shereece always thought I was way too anti-social, and I always thought she was in the streets too much-doing god knows what and with who. I thought about it and remembered him telling me how much fun he use to have when he and his brothers went to Jamaica when they were in there early adult years for a guys trip.  
“Jamaica.”  
“That’ll work. I’ll make arrangements.”  
“If we can even get him out his room.”  
I muttered.  
“I may call my Uncle and talk him into going.”  
“Yeah. It’ll be just like when they *all* went. He’d really like that.”  
“I’ll call Unc later. Remind me. Cause you know how my mind is. Speaking of the A, I finally get to meet this man that you won’t tell nobody nothing about.”  
“Nothing to tell.”  
I said. Messing with Reece cause I knew it drove her *crazy* not to be in the know of everything and every damn body. So I purposely hadn’t shared all that much about us.  
“You aren’t even gonna tell me how yal meet?”  
“He was at the Platinum one night when T.I came through and I was working. He came up to me later and bought me a drink and told me he liked my set. We exchanged numbers.”  
I said simply. That had been last summer. Ever since we’d talked on and off. At first, we were just cool. I kinda knew he had a rep when I first meet him. He was just *too* damn smooth. Everything about him, his chocolate skin, that killer smile, and the way he flashed that gold tooth that gleamed in the club’s spotlights. To his fur jacket and 500.00 shoes. Player was written *all* over him. But as I got to know him we’d connected on so many things music, sports, movies. Then we both just really wanted to get away from our cities. All those late-night conversations with us talking till 3:00 and him getting personal with me about things he said he’d never told anyone. It wasn’t long before I’d caught feelings.  
Mostly up until this point, all we’d done was talked on the phone. After the first time, I’d meet him at the club, months had gone by. He’d said he was going to try to make it down one weekend, but I hadn’t heard back. I called him a couple of times, but his phone had gone to voice. I was just about to give up on his ass and delete his number. There was another guy at my school that was acting like he wanted to get to know me. But then one day in the middle of the afternoon, he showed up at my high school apologizing to me and telling me about what the mother of his son had been putting him through. I ditched and we spent the rest of the afternoon at the Wynfry Hotel by the Galleria. That was our first time. But this time would be special. *This* would be our first real date.  
I thought he thought it would be lame. I was 17 years old. He was 21. But he just kinda laughed and seemed to be tickled by the whole thing. He told me he’d never gone to his prom on account that he had dropped out of school at 14 to take care of his mom and sisters. He said he’d be honored to go to the prom with the sexiest woman he’d ever meet in his life. Then told me he thought he was falling for me.  
“So are yal getting it or what?”  
Reece raised her eyebrows. I just gave her a look like maybe we are, maybe we aren’t. But just then my phone rang. I thanked the lady and stepped outside so Mrs. Nosy Ass couldn’t hear my conversation. My heart skipped a beat when I saw Bobby’s number.  
“Hey.”’  
I said smiling.  
“Hey. Where you at?”  
“Are you here?”  
I asked trying but not hiding the excitement in my voice.  
“Uh not quite.”  
I didn’t like the sound of this so I said sharply.  
“You are still coming right?”  
“I’m trying. You know I told you I had that court thing today with my ex over my son?”  
It didn’t ring any bells.  
“Well, it’s going on a little longer than I expected. I been tied up at the courthouse all afternoon. I ain’t know it was gonna take this long. She tripping and shit.”  
“But you gone be here by 7 right?”  
I checked my phone. It was after 5:00. My nails, toes, and hair were already done. I was just waiting around for Reece and her girl Adrienne. He still had plenty of time to make the drive from Georgia to Birmingham.  
“Caryn you know there’s nowhere else I wanna be, right? Don’t get mad. Please don’t get mad. I’ma try to get out of here, but I just might be a little late. It’s cool baby. You said your sister is renting a limo right? If I’m not there by the time the limo gets there then just ride with them. I’ll find my way to the school if you give me the address. I’ll put it in my GPS.”  
I didn’t say anything.  
“Caryn you know I don’t want this. It just slipped my mind about this hearing. Come on baby. You know how important this is for me. And I want you to meet him when all this is over. Your gonna be in his life too. I told him about you.”  
Ok, I thought. Not sure how I felt about that. I didn’t think we were at the point where I was ready to meet his kid (little did I know he had more than one). But right then, I was thinking ok don’t go off. How long could this court thing last. They’d probably wrap up and he’d be on the road in 15, and we’d still be on time. If not relatively. Any other time I wouldn’t have even worried about getting to this thing period. But I guess Reece’s excitement had rubbed off on me.  
“Ok.”  
Then I heard a loud voice yell.  
“HES WITH ME BITCH!”  
And the line went dead. That was my first introduction to Paula. I stared at the phone for a minute. Then I shrugged it off. I was so dumb I was thinking she’d probably walked up on him and snatched the phone out his hand. Which *is* what he’d told me later. By then I was ready to get out of there. I called Kenneth (who’d taken the day off to be there for me and Shereece if we needed anything) to pick me up from the shop and told Reece I’d see her back at the house. (She had WAY to much going on with all the hair she was having sewn in). I hoped in his Lexus as soon as he pulled up.  
“Wow! Caryn you look..”  
“Like a female?”  
I teased. I know he wasn’t used to seeing me in anything that wasn’t oversized or baggy.  
“You look incredible!”  
“Thanks!”  
“I can’t get over how *different* you look? She did a really good job!”  
“Wow! I didn’t know I was *that* tore up!”  
I teased. He gave me a look.  
“You know what I mean. You know *I’ve* always thought you were a knock out without the hair and make-up. I guess I’m just in my feelings. You can’t blame me. My daughters are on their way to the PROM.”  
“Junior. You still have us for a little while.”  
I reminded him.  
“Before I know it yal will be leaving me to go to your senior prom, then graduating, then yal will get up outta here and I’ll only get phone calls from you every other month.”  
“I’ll be around. I wouldn’t do you like that.”  
“Please! I bet you’ll be on the first thing out of the Ham. And I don’t blame you. You don’t have to stick around for my sake. You don’t have anything holding you here?”  
“I think I have a pretty good reason to stick around. And then I was thinking about it. Birmingham Southern has a music studies. I think maybe I could be good at that.”  
“I’ll help you any way I can. I actually know someone over the board that’s a brother. I’ll give him a call and see what I can find out. *Anything* you need all you have to do is ask and I got you!”  
“Thanks .. Dad.”  
I said a little shyly. Trying the word out. At this stage Kenneth and I had only discussed adoption. He said he’d find out what steps had to be taken and inform me every step of the way. Kenneth looked at me a little surprised, but he smiled and it light up his whole face.  
“So, have you eaten anything or is that bad luck to eat before the prom cause you think your dress will pop? Are we good there? Do we have to have any last-minute alterations done or are we just ready to go? The flowers? Harlem's flower? Bobby's flower?”  
“We’re good. It’s at the house. I picked up the flowers this morning. Can I ask you something?”  
“You can ask me *anything*.”  
“How did you meet her? You don’t have to talk about if.”  
“It’s ok. And I apologize. I know I’ve kind of been shutting you and Sheerece out these last few months.”  
“It’s ok.”  
“No. It’s not. There’s no excuse for that. I may have lost her but I still have two of the most amazing daughters a father could have. I’ve been moping around like I don’t have anything to live for when I have *everything* to live for. I’m in good health. I love my job! I’ve been blessed in so many ways that others aren’t fortunate enough to be. I’m gonna get it together.”  
“You lost your *wife*. No-one expects you to be Mr. Sun shine all the time.”  
I thought about telling him about the trip, but then decided that it should be a surprise. Reece and I should just pack his bags one day and then tell him we’re taking him for a drive. Then when we got to the airport SURPRISE.  
“To answer your question. Bianca and I meet. Well actually not meet. I saw her for the first time here at a fashion show that was being held at the BJCC. The Ebony Fashion show. You might or might not remember Ebony magazine.”  
I raised my eyebrows.  
“Yes, I went to a fashion show. It was with my Mom though. She was into clothes so somehow when my Pops didn’t want to go, guess who got roped into it. Man you should have seen the looks I was giving her. I was *not* happy AT ALL! I’d rather have been *any* where else. But then I saw the woman of my dreams walking down that run way and you couldn't tell me fashion wasn't the greatest thing in the world. Hell I was probably thinking does Lawson State offer a fashion major?I told myself right then that’s gonna be my wife.”  
“So, you went up to her after the show?”  
“Unfortunately, no. The BJCC was PACKED! I didn’t even know where to start to look for her in all that crowd. I forgot how I found this out, but I did find out where the models were staying, But by the time I got up the nerve to go to the hotel they’d already checked out and were probably on a flight to their next location.”  
“Damn!”  
“Yeah. You telling me. That messed me up for a little bit. I couldn’t get this girl out of my head. Even though I had NO idea what I would have said to her. She looked like she was 21 years old. What could my little minimum wage working at Block Buster self-have offered someone like that? So I tried to put her out my head and I started dating someone else. Janae. She reminded me of you some. Tall, dark eyes, dark-skinned. That was one MEAN female. I mean if I was ONE minute late calling her when I was supposed to that was my ASS! My boys was like she fine but OH HELL NAH.”  
“What did *you* see in her?”  
“Well I guess I liked the way she was down for me. She would snatch off them earrings in a heart beat if you even looked like you wanted to come at me wrong. Male or female! She did not care. Then *anything* I ever needed she’d do. If I skipped she’d cover and lie for me. If say I was sick and missed assignments she’d bring them to me. If we took a test and I didn’t study she’d get me the answers.”  
“So why’d yal break up?”  
“Uh honestly I think it just fizzled out. I was seeing another girls. She was seeing this cat at West End when she wasn’t with me. I knew about it, but at the time it was what it was. She uh well I heard from around some things about her.”  
“Like?”  
“That she liked it rough! And I guess she needed a thug in her life. Regrettably by our reunion she’d married one and he shot her in the head and killed her. That’s why I told Shereece and you too PLEASE don’t get caught up by all that thug life. The money and the cars and the jewelry might LOOK appealing but too many girls in my class went down that route and some of em aren’t here today to tell the story.”  
“But you saw her again?”  
“Yeah. I did. After I graduated, I went to State and one of the courses I took was Art History as an elective. I thought it would be an easy A for some reason. Anyway, the course offered a trip to Paris to study some famous art artifacts. Again, I had got with another girl and she just so happened to be in the same class. She wanted to see a fashion show at a famous fashion house. And there she was again.”  
“And you talked to her.”  
“Yeah. But it wasn’t exactly one of my finiest moments.”  
He winced.  
“I told the girl I had going out with *right* after the show “It’s over!” I know. I was a jerk. I make no excuses for the way I broke up with that girl. I thought about it since nights when I’d be waiting for her to call and it went to voice that’s *exactly* what you get.”  
“So, what did you say when you finally meet her?”  
He sighed.  
“I was so full of myself. I just walked up to her and said something like are you with anyone? She was like excuse me? I said are you here with anyone. She said no I am not. I told her Good Cause you’re here with *me* and I grabbed her by the hand, took her outside, and we made out.”  
“Well they always say that we love a man with confidence.”  
“I really just can not believe how arrogant I was. I was fresh off line. You couldn’t *tell* me I wasn’t the shit!”  
“Obviously it worked.”  
“Did it tho? All that *IM THE MAN* stuff didn’t last. *SHE* was the man in *that* household. And I couldn’t do anything but say yes baby. And I should apologize for her attitude towards you. She wanted to run around and do what the hell she wanted, but she was always jealous of any other females attentions towards me.  
“Ah. It’s cool.”  
It wasn’t like I hadn’t been there before. For some reason , I just did *not* get along well with other females. But WHATEVER! When my mind came back to the present, the lady was now finished and asking me how they looked. I examined my silver colored nails, thanked her, and gave her a nice tip.  
Later on that night back at the Darcie Manor, Afrika and Harlem were hanging out.Afrika was sitting behind me on the floor braiding my hair so she could sew the weave in. Harlem had decided to spend the night so we could head out in the morning. He left to take a phone call. Afrika leaned down and whispered.  
“Is that *you*?”  
“Who *him*? NOT! He’s my sister’s ex.”  
Afrika looked at me like “AND? HE IS PHOINE!” I could practically smell the desire coming off her.  
“We’re cool. That’s it. He’s like a brother.”  
“Yeah well my * brother* don’t look like dat. You don’t mind do you.”  
“Go ahead.”  
“I’m trying to see what that D do.”  
“Well take it somewhere else. This isn’t the Motel 6.”  
Afrika looked at me like the what? I shook my head. Of course, she wouldn’t get it. She was a millennial.  
“Never mind. Shoot your shot.”  
I told her.  
“Is he seeing someone tho?”  
“He sees a lot of someone’s.”  
I muttered and winced as she pulled my hair a little too tight. But I didn’t think Afrika wanted that. Or rather Deja didn’t. Deja might be loud and pregnant, but the Onyx girls were loud and STREET. They didn’t just fight with words. They fought with KNIVES. I heard Afrika even say about some girl who was trying to make eyes at a man she was with at a club. “BITCH TRY IT! IM NOT SCARED TO GO BACK TO JUVENILLE! I WILL CUT YOU!” Hell,as tough as everyone thought I was *I* was scared of the Onyx girls.  
“WORD! ITS LIKE THAT! HE A REAL FREAK HUNH. I BETCHO I COULD TURN HIS ASS OUT. OH ITS ONNN!”  
She announced and did a little dance move. I hope she at least finished my hair before she tried to take him upstairs and tear his clothes off. Well they could *have* Darcie. I was not trying to hear they’re sex sounds all damn night long. Maybe there was a vacant apartment in Wild Haven I could *borrow* for tonight.  
“You know we cool right tho? I mean I gots respect for you. You my girl so if you want in I’m good with that.”  
Did she just invite me to have a three-sum with her and Harlem? OH HELL NAH! But then I had to remember she was from a different generation and she probably thought she was doing a nice thing.  
“Uh. Thanks. It’s ..really nice of you to share, but I think I’m good.”  
“Are you sure girl?! You ain’t had nun of that good Vitamin D in a while tho?”  
“I have to get up in the morning. I have an early drive ahead of me.”  
She shrugged like more for me and continued to braid. I was surprised she hadn't heard. Harlem came back in the room looking stressed.  
“Hey SEXY!”  
Afrika flirted. But he barely heard her. I looked at him and knew something was up.  
“What did she say now?”  
I hoped with everything in me he hadn’t told Deja about Darcie. I REALLY didn’t need the drama. I liked my solitude.  
“No, it’s not her. It’s Tiff. Her husband's punk ass. They got in a physical fight. I don’t know everything Mom was hysterical. All I got was he took Tesha  
DAMN! Tesha was Harlem’s little niece, and she was a doll!  
“Did they call the police?”  
“From what I got, I think they put out a APB for his arrest and they’re sending o ut RED ALERTS that if the car is spotted to let them know.”  
He paced around all the while blowing smoke.  
“You don’t mind if I smoke this do you?”  
Now while *I* was used to the smell of marijuana and I’m pretty sure Afrika was (as a matter fact she was saying “Let me get a hit of that baby.”) not sure how my roommates would react to a smoked out house. I was never sure when either Roxy or Chaz would be here. Before I could say anything Harlem said.  
“I can take it outside. I probably don’t need to be smoking this.”  
“You good boo.”  
Afrika told him. Oh well, I guess I can Febreeze the place down tonight or tomorrow, open up some windows, and pray that they didn’t think it was *me* turning our new place into a Den of Sin, My smoking days were *LONG* in the past. I didn’t want to have anything to do with it ever since .. him. Too many bad memories. Harlem just would not be still. He kept pacing the floor and calling numbers until finally I said.  
“Hey! We can leave now if you want to.”  
I walked over to him, when he cursed loudly and threw his phone at the wall. I put my hand on his arm and felt him shaking with anger.  
“Thank you!”  
He looked at me and said.  
“I’ll.. go put my stuff in the car. Are we talking your car?”  
I nodded. Then I turned to Afrika.  
“Can you braid me in the car?”  
“I don’t have that much to do. I was almost ready to sew you.”  
“Do you mind coming with us? I can pay you for the hours you have to miss at the shop. Then I probably will be back by Monday. Tuesday tops. I just want to make sure my Pops is ok for a few days. It’s a hard time for him.”  
“GIRL HELL YEAH! They’ll be aiight. You ain’t gotta pay me. I’ll just move some things around and tell my clients something can up and I had to leave and go out of town.”  
“Ok. I’m just gonna go upstairs and get my bags. I’ll be back.”  
“I’ll go check on him.”  
“Hey! Don’t be getting my ride all funky. I think there’s a storage storm cellar out back.”  
On the way up the stairs, another memory hit me. I had just started Birmingham Southern and it was around October. I remembered that because kids were allowed on campus to come trick or treat from dorm room to dorm room. Everything looked really pretty. The leaves were starting to turn colors. I was just walking from The Hilltop’s (which is what we nicknamed) Café located at the Norton Center when a familiar looking girl stopped me.  
“Hey! I didn’t know you went here!”  
I tried to bring up a face but was coming up blank. I didn’t think she was in my graduating class. Obviously because she was talking to me.  
“Hey. I just started last month. I’m still kinda feeling my way around.”  
“It’s amazing isn’t it?”  
“Yeah.”  
Birmingham Southern did have a charm about it.  
“I really think your gonna love it here! Oh I’m Sasha.”  
She laughed.  
“Harlem’s sister. You probably knew me by Tiffany, although he’s probably the only one that still calls me that. It’s a long story. The short of it is Tiffany was my birth mom’s name and I really don’t relate to that woman at all. I’m in the process now of changing it.”  
“Congrats!”  
I told her. I can definitely relate.  
“Thanks! And you are Cara. Your Reece’s friend. I’ve seen yal together.”  
“Sister. But don’t hold it against me.”  
“I won’t but she’s not here too is she?”  
“Nah. “  
Shereece hadn’t even waited until her diploma was in her hand good before the next thing I knew she was telling me she was staring an early admission isn’t State for the summer term. Her bags were already packed and a couple weeks later she was GONE!  
“Oh thank god! I wouldn’t want to have to say nothing to that girl. He told me to just leave it alone, but you don’t know me. And what she did was...”  
“Yeah.”  
Of course, I knew about the baby. I knew (and was there) for her freak out. But what I never understood was why after she lost it she lost her mind and decided she wanted to fuck around on him instead of just *talking* to him about any of it. I of course had tried to talk some sense into her, but she said she had *wanted* it like that. That it was better this way that he move on. She claimed she’d be starting State soon and didn’t want to be tied down to her high school boyfriend cause no body did that anymore. That she just needed a new look.  
“I actually thought me and her were cool, but it definitely wasn’t cool what she did. When she cut him off she cut all of us off.”  
She said voice dripping full of bitterness. I really didn’t have anything *too* say. Shereece and I weren’t exactly in the best place ourselves. It had been about 3 months since I’d even heard from her. The last conversation we had (had) turned into a heated argument.  
“Yeah well. Your probably better off. The only person my sister thinks about is herself.”  
Sasha and I gave each other a look of understanding. I tried to lighten the mood.  
“Is this your first year too?”  
I know she was about 4 years older from what I could remember, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t put off college and decided to start later in life. She laughed.  
“Actually it’s my last year. I’ll be finishing up my nursing degree. Hopefully I can get on at Brookwood or Princeton or UAB. I stay in Hilltop Village Apartments. Which dorm do you stay?”  
“I still stay at home with my Dad. I kinda wanted to stay close for a little while. He’s been through a lot.”  
“How is he by the way? Harlem talks about him *ALL* the time. OH GOD he won’t shut up about how much he looks up to him, and he wants to go into a field that he’ll be as respected as him. He wants a car like him. He wants to pledge A PHI A like him. ON AND ON AND ON. Like GOD boy why don’t you just MARRY HIM.”  
I laughed.  
“He has that effect on a lot of people. He.”  
Just then we were interrupted by a tall, white, guy who sauntered up out of nowhere. He didn’t look happy. I stood to the side.  
“Oh Brayden. Brayden this is Cara. Cara Brayden my fiancee”  
He nodded barely acknowledging me.  
ss “Why the hell are you standing around out here? Did you forget I had to take my pych test to get on and your supposed to drive me there?  
His voice was hard and firm.  
“No I didn’t.”  
She said. Obviously pissed that she was being fronted on in front of someone she knew. He gave a sarcastic laugh.  
“I swear sometimes you aren’t good for.”  
She cut him off.  
“Well if you’d get that raggedy piece of shit.”  
“You do *NOT* talk about my car.”  
He hissed. Eyes flaring. Her eyes bore into his. His into her for a minute. AWKWARD! That was my cue.  
“Just go get the damn car *Tiffany*. You've already made me late enough as it is.”  
She stood there.  
“NOW!”  
I did *NOT* want to be the reason she got whupped later and this guy reeked off domestic violence. What was she even doing with someone like that, I’d wondered.  
“It’s okay. I’ll catch up with you later sometimes.”  
Or not? I’d thought as she turned to walk off and I saw him snatch her arm and pull her in the other direction as she yanked it back.  
I had reached the top of the stairs and pushed the door open to my bedroom. I’d finally gotten it the way I wanted. It was in a colorful Arabian Nights look with looks of golds, reds, purples, and drapped hangings from the bed and curtains. Lots of plush, colorful, pillow on the bed and floor. Some Morrocan wall art and vases completed the look. I called it “Dreamscape.” I picked up a couple of bags from my window seat and sat them in the hallway. There was something that was slipping my mind? What was it? I looked around my room. I went over to one of the drawers and through a pack of mini candy bars in my bag. Harlem would probably need them. I remembered how much of a sweet tooth he had.  
Then I went in the bathroom and I remembered. I reached up into one of the pretty boxes I found at an odds and ends store and retrieved it. My mind flashed back.  
“Please come in!”  
Bianca’s soft, pretty, voice instructed and I entered into her and Kenneth’s bedroom. But I knew that voice could be deceptive. She  
“Am I in trouble?”  
I asked wearily. She had her back to me rummaging through one of there drawers. She didn’t speak. When she did she turned around slowly.  
“I will be leaving soon. I am doing a shoot for Vouge. It will be my biggest cover.”  
The way she’d said it I got the feeling that she would not be returning. I wasn’t quite sure what I was supposed to say. We’ll miss you? Good luck? Have you told your HUSBAND and DAUGHTER whose hearts would probably be beyond broken. Instead I sank down on the fancy foot stool at the end of the bed.  
“Good luck.”  
That felt safe to say. Though I probably could have let loose with a whole barrage of things.  
“You do not think much of me. I can not say I blame you. I have not made things easy”  
She sat next to me on the foot stool and folded her legs underneath her.  
“An d for that I do apologize.”  
She sighed.  
“I do not belong here Caryn. Kenneth and I were both so young. I really did try Caryn. I tried *so* hard.”  
And now your just giving up on them? NIICE! I did *not* feel one once of sympathy for her.  
“Kenneth tells me you want to be a part of this family. You will make them both happy. I have seen him with you. He loves you as if you are his own. And not many people can put up with my daughter. You will watch out for them. Please promise.”  
She said in her baby. soft, voice with the pretty French accent.I was just 17 years old. I could barely watch out for my damn self.  
“You don’t have to do this,”  
She closed her eyes and said very tiredly.  
“I do not belong here Caryn and I do not have peace. It is all too much. I want to go home.”  
Was she talking about Paris or did she mean home as in the sky. Suddenly I got a chill. Hadn’t Reece told me she’d once had a problem with an addiction to pills. OH GOD what if?  
“Hey. I know it may not feel iike it but you *do* belong here. With us. You have a husband that ADORES you and Shereece IDOLIZES you! The only thing she ever wants is your approval! That’s why she does all the things she does. She wants to live up to your name. She even told me she’s going to major in fashion design at State. It’s so she can start a fashion empire and become international like you.”  
“I am not.. good for them. Sometimes I think they would be better without me here. I am away as it is. And you think I am horrible! There is not room.”  
“I don’t think that. I mean ok. Right *now* I don’t think much of you because your sitting here telling me your about to walk out on your family, How am I supposed to feel? Do you know my Dad walked out of me and my mother? I never even saw his *face* and you. You have the kind of man that some women will NEVER see. Loving devoted husband and father and you wanna LEAVE! And Sheerece, I know she can be a lot to deal with, but she’s not *that* bad. She doesn’t deserve that. No one does. I’m sorry I think that’s selfish.”  
I told her angrily.  
“And you would be right Caryn. I *am* selfish. I never should have married. I love my husband but I can not be the wife he needs. He deserves better.”  
She said looking straight into my eyes.  
“And what about me? I guess you just want to up and leave me too hunh?”  
I stood up abruptly.  
“I have done nothing since you have started to stay with us, but bitch at you and treat you second rate.”  
“Yeah well I guess I’m used to that. But it *didn’t* matter. Do you know why? I admired you *anyway*. Because I thought you were one of the most courageous women I knew. You made a name for yourself at 12 years old and you traveled all around the WORLD!”  
“As will you some day Caryn. This I have no doubt. I have listened to the music you make and read the words. I have never read something so beautiful. Your words are your gift Caryn. They are your power. You must not forget that.”  
“Then if you feel that way stay with us. I know we got off to a rocky start but we can work it out.I lost my mom a long time ago to depression and drugs and alcohol. Please! You’re the only mother I have. I don’t want to lose you too.”  
Bianca held her hand to her heart and her eyes misted a little. She sniffled and stood. For some reason my eyes were hot and wet too. She stood behind me and turned me to face her. She pulled me to her in a hug and then opened my hand and placed something inside it.  
“Please. Always remember.”  
Then another flashback happened. I looked in the mirror at my half-done braided hair and I was looking into another mirror. He was right behind me.  
“What are you doing here Blaze?”  
My heart in real life started to pound in my chest. I heard him say from behind me.  
“What’s the matter baby? You not happy to see me? Why don’t you come over here and show Daddy how happy you are to see *him* and wrap those sexy lips around *him* like you use to.”  
I felt him press up against me hard from the back. That use to do something to me back then. Right then all I felt was repulsion. I stepped to the side and walked away from him.  
“Hey! Bitch. Don’t walk away from me when I’d talking to you.”  
He could up with me and snatched me up by the arm.  
I felt my body getting warm and the top I had on started to get damp from the cold sweat that was breaking out all over my body.  
“LEAVE!”  
I said through gritted teeth.  
“I told you it’s over!”  
He got up on me and said in my ear as he liked it.  
“Now you know you don’t really mean that baby. I told you I just fucked that bitch. It didn’t mean nothing.”  
“And I guess the baby she’s carrying doesn’t mean nothing.”  
“Psh. That bitch lying. You feel that dumb shit. You as stupid as she is. How I know dats even mine.”  
I whirled around and stared at him a minute. It was the same ol shit. I’d done this entirely too damn long. I walked away from him. This seemed to infuriate him.  
“I WONT TELL YOU AGAIN BITCH. THIS SHIT AINT OVER UNTIL I SAY ITS OVER. NOW GET OVER THERE, TAKE OFF YOUR FUCKING CLOTHES, CRAWL TO ME SLOW, AND MAKE THAT SHIT UP TO ME.”  
He went and sat down in one of the living room chairs and started to unzip his pants. My hands started to shake and I gripped the edge of the sink. My heart was racing erratically. So fast. So hard I thought I was having a panic attack. I tried to close my eyes. Make it stop! I thought. In the hotel room I walked over and snatched up the room’s phone and started to dial.  
“WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING? GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE HOE AND GET YO DAMN PUNISHMENT.”  
He whipped his belt out his jeans and I started to dial.  
“Hello this is the front desk how may I direct your call?”  
“Yes! I need security to come up to my room.”  
I didn’t get out another word before the phone was being yanked out my hand and out the wall. I screamed,  
“GET THE HELL OUT OF MY ROOM!”  
God please make it stop, I thought or did I say out loud. I felt a pair of rough hands wrapping themselves around my neck and walking with me toward the wall. They were shaking me by the neck as they were talking. Then I felt my head being slammed into the wall repeatedly. Then the front of my top was ripped away from me like it was Velcro. Followed by a loud, hard, smack across my chest. The thing I was holding dropped and clattered on the floor. The sound brought me back to reality. I shakily tried to regain my senses. I’m ok. He was gone now. I’m back at the Darcie. I sat down on the toilet and tried to right my breathing.  
“I’m ok.”  
I told myself. He can’t hurt us again. I’d made sure of that. Harlem my mind tried to focus. Harlem needs to get home. We have to go Tesha. But first I had to change. I kneeled down to get what had dropped and then I got the surprise of my life. As I kneeled against the wall behind the sink the wall started to revolve. When I looked up I was on the other side.  
“The hell?”  
I mumbled. I was standing in what looked like a vault. Trunks full of silver and gold coins were staring back at me.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *THE POST THAT STARTED IT ALL. I DECIDED TO REWRITE AND REMIX THIS POST THAT WAS THE FIRST ONE I SUBMITTED IN LAD. WHAT A MOMENTOUS DAY! SINCE I’M TAKING YAL TO MY CITY TO GET REACQUAINTED WITH MY INITIAL CHARACTERS AND BRING IN SOME NEW ONES WHAT BETTER TIME AND PLACE. SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADIEU A LONGER MORE POLISHED “REECE’S REVENGE” (I DO WANNA GET CLOSE TO YOU 3LW)

Reece's Revenge (Longer, Extended, Cut)  
As I pulled up to BSU (Birmingham Southern University), I thought I never knew this place had so much size just passing by it. And I’d driven past it plenty when I came home every so often to visit Daddy. He’d long since moved out or our old home because he said he just wanted to start over. So, he’d settled on a one-story house that was a 5-minute drive in the same neighborhood of this campus. I also knew he wanted to be close enough to my sister if she needed him for anything, but not be all in her space smothering her. In her second year here, she’d moved out into one of the female dorms, and now because of her and the rest of the Black Student Union, he had told me she got the Pan Hel Committee to get chapters for the African-American sororities and fraternities to have a presence on the campus. She’d pledged Z-Phi B, and was now living in one of the sorority houses. GIRL YOU BETTER DO THAT! I thought with pride as I parked in front of her building. I always knew she’d had it in her. I sat there for a minute and thought about that first time.  
It was my sophomore year at Ramsey. The first day of school. I was KILLING IT that day as I stepped out of my Dad’s Benz. The picture of 2000 fashion with my frosted lips shining, lace-up jeans, cami, and sky blue, lace-up top with the tattoo choker. I RAN RHS! They all *knew* it. The guys were eyeing me and the girl’s stopped their conversations and whispered. As I was walking up the steps looking at my pager and wondering who this new guy was that had gotten them all hot over, something hard bumped into my arm. When I looked up there she was.  
“EXCUSE YOU!”  
I said loudly. She stopped and turned around.  
“YES!”  
“I APOLOGIZE!”  
She raised her eyebrows like what. She lowered her headsets.  
“You nearly took the skin off my arm.”  
I examined it cause I saw the slightest signs of a bruise it was gonna be me and her. Did she even know who I was?  
“Oh did I bump you? My bad. I’m definitely sorry I bumped into you.”  
She said in a cynical tone with a smirk. Right away I decided I did not like this girl. Clearly, she was *new* and didn’t know *the rules*. You do NOT wanna get on my bad side.  
“I won’t make that mistake again.”  
As I watched her walk away I mumbled.  
“Yeah, you better hope not.”  
It was a new year and I really wanted to keep it drama free. But I did happen to bump into her later on in the week. She was auditioning to be on the dance team. As I watched her silently from the back of the gym, I saw that she outdanced the rest of the potentials. I had watched her every move thoughtfully. When the auditions wrapped, I’d thought about saying something, but then hanged my mind and left before she caught me watching her. I just didn’t feel like getting into it with that girl today. She might could dance her ass off, but she still rubbed me the wrong way. We would NEVER be friends!  
I just hoped I thought as I got out my car, and got my peace offering out the back seat that this went well. Surely she would see (and appreciate) my vision. Because how could she not? She *had* to be tired of this place by now. I mean, I’m not really sure why the hell she’s still *here*! Dad doesn’t need us now. It’s been 4 years since Mom. He told me he even dates occasionally (tho nothing serious). Which he better not even TRY to spring another mother on me!  
I struggled to open the door and one of her sisters rushed over.  
“Here let me get that for you.”  
“Thanks! I’m here to see my sister Caryn. Is she in?”  
“Yeah. I think she’s in her room. You can go up. It’s the third door at the top.”  
“Thanks.”  
Well, this is new, I thought. I never thought I’d see the day my sister would be living in a sorority house. She was *the* most anti-social person I think I’d ever meet. I’d always try to get her to go to parties and clubs with me, but she’d just rather hang out at the house reading or writing or working on music. I thought she was *the* most boring person. I use to be on her constantly to have some kind of life.I mean you’d *think* she’d *want* to get out of her own little stuffy apartment with that woman.  
When I got to her door, I paused though. There were raised voices coming from inside her door. So you know I had to listen. At first, I thought OH GOD it’s *that* ass. How many times had I told Caryn to dump his ass and tell him to kick rocks? What did she even see in him? I mean he wasn’t really all that fine. He must have REALLY been putting it down or either he was caking her (and giving her tons of money). Yeah, that had to be it. College (even with a scholarship) was NO JOKE! But not even *that* would make me put up with all his drama. That’s ok, girl. I GOT YOU! Cause when you hear about my idea, you won’t need him for shit!  
“I told you what this was.”  
Caryn was saying in an aggravated tone. No. The voice was too deep for Blazes.  
“I know you told me what this was and I know I agreed. And I don’t know why I did. But Caryn I can’t be that man on the side that you run to when his ass let’s you down over and over and over. You know how I feel about you. I’m not trying to share you like that no more. If it can’t just be *us*.”  
She didn’t say anything.  
“And you *know* I got you. Haven’t I always? Whenever you need money for something and you didn’t want to ask your Pops or your siste who came through for you? When you needed me to drop by at 3 sum at night? When you pledged, *I* was the one who got you through. *I* was the one who’d sneak your stuff. You never even had to *ask* with me. Where the HELL has he been? Up in the Atlanta with all his baby mama’s. You don’t mean shit to him!”  
Right away I approved of this one and she hadn’t even told me about him.  
“You don’t know him like I do.”  
She hissed. He mumbled.  
“I don’t even think you do!”  
“Caryn come on! You know I’d never do half the stuff he does. I *always* get back no matter what I’m doing. Why do you even stay with him?’  
He asked angrily. GOOD DAMN QUESTION. I waited for the answer along with him.  
“Look Wade! It’s not like I don’t appreciate you being there. It’s just complicated.”  
“Complicated? Ok. Well, let me know when you uncomplicate it.”  
The door swung open and I was standing face to face with one of the sexiest brothers I’d EVER seen. He was tall, dark-skinned, bald.  
“I just got here.”  
I said quickly. I didn’t want him to think I’d been eavesdropping. Although that’s EXACTLY what I was doing.  
“She’s my sister.”  
Although right now I didn’t know why the hell I was claiming her, because she sounded mighty stupid to let this fine, ass, man, go! AND FOR WHAT? He looked at me for a minute as if recognizing me. Then said  
“She’s all yours.”  
Then he walked down the hall. Caryn stepped into the doorway. She had on nice Z PHI B sweatshirt and some sweat pants with the letters up the side. Her nails and toes were polished an electric blue. She’d grown her hair out in a bob so that it was now chin-length. I swung the basket from behind my back and presented it to her.  
“Hey. I come bearing gifts. Congrats on your crossing. I’m sorry I couldn’t make your probate. Dad told me about it though! Although you know you went in the wrong direction.”  
Cara smirked.  
“Nah, I’m good.”  
She stood aside and let me into her space.  
“Thanks!”  
She set the basket down on the couch and started to go through the contents. It was stuffed with water bottles, keychains, pens, an umbrella, a hat. Basically anything I could find with her letters on it.  
“These are nice.”  
“Soooo…”  
I started. Caryn sighed.  
“I know you heard. He’s a friend.”  
I raised my eyebrows.  
“Well, it *started* that way anyway. When we were freshmen, we took a lot of the same classes. I was really struggling for a little. He’d tutor me. I don’t know I guess one of those nights one thing just kinda lead to another. Then when I pledged I found out he was a Sigma so we’d see each other at certain events. I really wasn’t trying to lead him on. I told him I wasn’t trying to get in a relationship. And DO NOT SAY IT!”  
“I’m not.”  
Gonna tell you how STUPID your being! Cause if you don't want him.  
“REALLY! I’m not saying nothing. It’s not my business.”  
Caryn raised her eyes at me like since when.  
“No. I mean. I know we haven’t been in a good place. But you're still my s*sister*. I’m proud of you!”  
Caryn laughed in amusement.  
“I’ve been here for 3 years and you’re just coming here to tell me how proud you are of me. Well, I guess if I hadn’t crossed it’d be my graduation.”  
“Can’t we just put all that stuff to the side? I really have something I want to tell you and I REALLY need you to back me up on this.”  
“Ok. It sounds important. What is it? You haven’t.”  
She looked at my middle suspiciously.  
“No! OH GOD NO! I’m on the shots now.”  
I was NOT letting that happen again.  
“Ok. Tell me.”  
“My cousin’s group feel apart.”  
“Presjina? Damn! What happened?”  
“The lead one is dying and one of em went rouge.”  
I said cutting straight to the chase.  
“Wow! I didn’t know. That’s terrible! Are you gonna call her?”  
I ignored that question. See the last time I’d actually *seen* my cousin was at my Uncle’s funeral. And it was SO many people packed in my aunt’s mansion that day. Then there’d be the thing with her wondering off outside and being snatched up by a pycho path. Which how the hell he’d managed to get around all that security I’m still not sure. But in recent years, it was just always SOMETHING going on around that chick. Frankly, I was OVER IT!  
First it was all the family ever talked about that Presjina got signed to Misfit’s Music. Did you hear Welcome to the Candy Shop? How could I not? That damn cotton candy song played 24 seven. I swore one of em was sleeping with the DJ. Then it was that thing that went down at the Starlight Mansion were someone got pushed in the pool and died. Then it was now Presjina was a Starlight artist. Then there were the constant videos every time you looked up on VTV. Then came the whole mess with the funeral and her getting herself snatched up by a pycho path. Which just seemed SO shady that he’d gotten in with all that security my aunt put in place.  
You know what I thought. I didn’t say it but 1 I thought that selfish chick might not wanna admit it but I think *she* was the reason my Uncle had a stroke and died that day. Yeah, I know! Blah! Blah! Blah! It was the stress of him running for mayor. But it sho didn’t help that right BEFORE he died she’d walked out of the house after an argument with him about being in the industry. Couldna been me. I’ve loved acting, being on stage, traveling from city to city to a packed house with people applauding me and adoring me. And I’m not one to let NOBODY tell me what I should and shouldn’t do (Daddy knows not to try that with me). But I think if I knew he had prior health issues (I heard them talking about it at the funeral that Unc had high blood pressure), then I would have just had to come off the road. Some things are just more important than fame. It’s not like she even needed the money.  
Then let’s get real. She was SIGNED to Misfit’s Music. That was *not* just some random guy that snuck in and *kidnapped*her. That was ALL for show. It was probably her lover and they probably wanted a little publicity. She couldn’t even give Uncle his day at his own damn funeral. And everyone thought she was *the sweet one*!  
It wasn’t *always* this way. Something nagged at me that maybe I *should* give her a call. When we were about 11-16 for a little while Presjina and I use to be very tight. My mind flashed back to one summer when one of the many summers I’d spend vacations at her place. I use to love her place so much, I swore when I grew up that was how I’d be living. We were probably about 13 dancing and singing along with a famous girl group.  
Reece: Rollin in the club like what I  
Got the VIP on lockdown  
Then I saw you starin at me  
It wasn’t soundin too bad.  
Ya make me think that you’re the one  
Lickin your lips at me for fun  
While the Dj’s making em sway  
So come and step to me if you  
(Both) Wanna get down baby  
I do. Holla at me baby Ooh ooh  
If you rollin deep tonight then I do  
Wanna know you and if you  
Wanna get down, baby ooh-ooh  
Holla at me baby ooh -ooh  
If your love is ridiculous than I do  
Wanna get close to you  
(Presjina): Your ice, your gear, your sex-appeal  
Your game so tight, you got me feein  
Wanting you alone with me. That’s the illest fantasy.  
You make me feel like willin out. Showing you what it’s out.  
Got it going on uptown. So let me see you work it out on me.  
“Do you think we sound as good as them?”  
Presjina asked. Collapsing down on the floor. I said with confidence.  
“Nah., We sound BETTER!! We just need the right promotion.”  
I *KNEW* we’d blow up. Presjina laughed.  
“You're crazy! Girl, we don’t *know* anybody. Who's gonna sign us?”  
I thought about that.  
“Well, I mean we can talk to Uncle Patrick. He knows all kinds of people! There’s always somebody over here.”  
“Yeah BUSINESS people, He knows lawyers, and politicians, and Doctor’s. Some of them are so strait-laced. They wouldn’t know the first thing about RNB and pop.”  
“Maybe *they* don’t but they might know people who do. I think we show him what we just did after dinner.”  
My thought was that he’d be so impressed. He’d take one look at us and then *immediately* hop on the phone and start making calls.  
“You want us to dance to *that?”  
She said doubtfully.  
“Yeah. What? We killed it!”  
“I don’t know the lyrics are… I mean Daddy listens to some RNB but it’s older stuff like Teddy and Marvin and Aretha, the Four Tops, the Whispers. Now if we did someone like the Supremes.”  
She laughed. I rolled my eyes Uncle Patrick needed to step into the 20th century. He always keeps it on that old station whenever we had get-togethers outback.  
“Well, I’m sure we could come up with something. We got 5 hours.”  
I went over to her HUGE, walk-in, closet, and tried to find inspiration for something that we could do tonight to impress my Uncle enough that we’d be in someone’s studio tomorrow morning recording a demo.  
“It’s not just that.”  
She went over to her dresser drawer and handed me a folder and flipped through the neat, organized, papers.  
“It’s assigned I had to do at my school. We had to think of a business, make a plan, a budget, and then run one for a couple of weeks. I choose to do jewelry. I mean I designed it. I didn’t actually *make* it. Daddy found someone that helped me do that part. But I did the rest of it, and it went really well. We could set up booths at school at certain times. It was so cool! My jewelry always sold out.”  
She handed me another folder with pictures of the items she’d designed.  
“These are *really* good! And you didn’t save me any of these?”  
“I think I might have saved you something?”  
She went over to her Armoire, opened it, and then took out a special bracelet of little colorful beads and charms and placed it on my arm.  
“I made this one especially for my bestie.”  
I smiled as I looked down at it.  
“Anyway, Daddy went on and on and on about how proud he was of me. And how I was gonna be this big-time businesswoman! I mean it was a lot of fun, but I don’t know. I like music too!”  
“But think about it. You can do both.”  
She frowned.  
“How?”  
“You need *money* right to run a business? You’ll have to find somewhere to sell your jewelry right? You’ll have to rent a space. Then you’ll have to pay someone to actually *make* the jewelry. Then you’ll have to buy the material. Think about it, if we go into the studio, we can cut a demo. If we put it in the right hands or somehow if we can work it out with somebody here to let us perform in their club this place is so over-run with celebs that it just takes *one* to be impressed with us. Then labels will come out the woodworks trying to sign us. Then you can design all the jewelry you want girl!”  
Presjina smiled.  
“I guess I never thought of it like that. But I’m still not sure if Daddy is the right person.”  
“Then we’ll just have to find the right person.”  
I said with determination. Well, that was then. I turned my attention to my sister.  
“Do you remember that track that you were working on that you sent me?”  
She nodded.  
“It was just something I was playing around with.”  
I pulled up the music on my cell phone for the file she’d sent me just a couple of weeks ago.  
“Don’t you *see* what we have?”  
Cara looked confused.  
“A half-done track?”  
“No. You’re not getting it. If we can just add some lyrics to this and you do whatever it is you think you need to make it not rough. Cause honestly I don’t see where it needs nothing.”  
“Ok. But?”  
I sat down next to her on the couch and looked her straight in the eyes.  
“In the A, in about a month from now, there’s this new club opening that everyone and they mama been talking bout. We can start a girl group!”  
“A WHAT?!!”  
"A girl group."  
"Tell me your joking. A girl group? Why would we wanna do that?"  
Ok, not the reaction I was hoping for but maybe it just hadn't registered how big this could be.  
“You remember my cousin LuCinda. She can really sing. You, me, and her can start a girl group, and perform at the club. Someone *will* sign us! I KNOW it! I can feel it! We’ll be rich! We’ll travel *all* around the world. Don’t you see we GOT IT! With your music and lyrics and our good looks, we are gonna BLOW UP! All we have to do is practice the song, make up some choreography, pick some fly outfits. We’ll have em eating out of our hands.”  
“Wow!”  
“I know right! You love it!”  
I said patting myself on the back, but I looked at Cara’s face.  
“Why isn’t your face saying I love it!”  
I demanded. Cara moved away from me.  
“Typical!”  
She muttered. Now I was the one looking confused.  
“You really do have balls! You know that.”  
“What I do?”  
“You don’t come to visit me in YEARS! Didn’t come to my probate.”  
“You know that’s not fair. I wasn’t even *here*. You can’t blame me for that.”  
“You don’t even know what I’m majoring in.”  
“Isn’t it music?”  
I asked in confusion.  
“I haven’t wanted to major in music since my *freshman* year. My major is Business Administration.”  
She said sharply.  
“Maybe you’d know that if you actually gave a damn to get away from yourself for a few minutes to actually give me any time. And maybe you’d know that this is my last year here and maybe I want to graduate and not chase some half-ass idea of yours that you won’t.”  
I cut her off.  
“It’s not a half-ass idea. And Business Administration? COME ON! That don’t even sound like you. So what you wanna sit around in some stuffy, ass, office all day in a suit doing paper-work?”  
I’d scoffed. That definitely was not the Caryn I knew.  
“And *this* is better hunh?”  
She snapped. I looked at her like UH YEAH.  
“Maybe you need to watch Behind the Scenes. So now you want us to be a girl group? What tomorrow Shereece? Did you even think stop to think about all those girl girls that you see that you think are so rich are actually BANKRUPT because the labels took them for EVERY DIME? How much do you REALLY think girl groups get out of all the times they’re songs and videos are played on the radio? Do you need me to break that down for you?”  
“That doesn’t have to be us. Daddy can manage us. We wouldn’t cheat us?”  
Caryn just looked at me like I was unbelievable.  
“Do you EVER think of ANYONE but YOURSELF! *DAD* can manage us? DAD has a LIFE! A life that he’s FINALLY gotten together after you just took off. He’s HAPPY! And you just wanna up and rip him away from the job that he loves and his new girlfriend to follow you all around the world. Cause YOU think we should be a girl group!”  
“Ok. I know. I know. I haven’t been the best sister to you and I haven’t really been around a lot to check up on Daddy. But I’m trying to change that. You think I like the way things are. I’m trying to make this right. I hear everything your saying. I never said it *would* be easy but I know we can do this. If we have to manage ourselves. You just told me you’ve studied business management for 3 years. See maybe that’s the reason.”  
“Oh so you want me to do the music, write the songs, work out the choreography *AND* manage the group hunh?”  
“No that’s not what I’m saying.”  
Why was she making all this so HARD! She was the one who’d just said we couldn’t trust the industry. I was starting to get frustrated. So I took a breath.  
“I thought you’d be happy about this. We use to dance together all the time. You were the one who helped me keep the squad HOT! Why did you stop liking it so much?”  
I asked curiously.  
“I guess it just didn’t feel right anymore.”  
“Ok.”  
“And then it sounds like you just wanna do this to get even with your cousin. I don’t wanna be a part of that.”  
“It’s not about that.”  
I lied. I thought fast.  
“This could help us.”  
“How?”  
Caryn asked skeptically.  
“It could help us because we’d be working together so we’d be spending a lot of time together. I wouldn’t be in one place and you in another. We’d *have* talk to each other, wouldn’t we? I’d be like…... getting to know each other all over again. And then you’d like my cousin. She’s nice. Very easy to get along with. You won’t have a problem with *her*. Then she could help. It wouldn’t all be on you. She and I can do the costumes for the shows and she’s good at writing too. I can do a little something. I can help with ideas.”  
Caryn considered and sighed.  
"I'm not a singer. That's *your* thing. I'm not trying to be on stage in front of a lot of people half-dressed and dancing sexy. That's not."  
"You *can* sing. I've heard you before. And I wouldn't make you sing lead if you were uncomfortable with it. It could be me and Cinda. You'd just be backing us up. Then you know I heard about your little part-time gig in the A so you can pay for school."  
She kind of flushed.  
"See, you wouldn't have to do *that* anymore. And then I'm not trying to stop you from graduating. I'd never do that. Education is important. Just give it a year. Better yet. Just do the show-case. If nothing comes from it cool. It'll just be a fun thing we did together for laughs."  
"And if we get offered a contract?"  
"You could take online classes or you could just take a year off. There *are* ways. We'd make it work."  
“You really want this!”  
I nodded.  
“I mean but if you don’t. I guess I can respect that. You *do* have your own life now. I guess I can’t just expect you to just drop everything because of *me*. But I still want to take you out to celebrate! Let’s call Daddy and we can go out tonight.”  
“Ok. First of all, I’m not saying I’m doing this. But I guess I can help us get something ready in time for the showcase. It might be fun. I haven’t done music in a while.”  
I jumped up and threw my arms around Caryn.  
“THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I KNEW YOU WOULD SEE IT! YOU WILL NOT REGRET THIS!”  
“Yeah, Yeah, Get off me. I’m hungry and you’re paying. Let’s go see if Dad’s around. He should be home.”  
I grinned to myself as she grabbed her jacket and locked the door to her room. It was ON! Time to get what was rightfully mind and should have been all along! And nothing was gonna stand in my way. I hoped my dear sweet cousin was prepared for the storm that was coming. She was yesterday’s news. Welcome to the NEW Candy era 2005.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title Green Eggs and Ham popped in my head for this post because it had Ham in it (as in Birmingham). But the question was how could I make this relate to the poem itself. I thought about the message of the poem which is you can deny you like something all you want, but unless you try it you never know. Then it hit me Vladimir's could be the character hell-bent on fighting he likes something, and Boris could be "Sam". It took off from there. I think I made it work. What do you think? To those of you not familiar with Beyond and thinking who in the world are these people. I recognize only the name Kimber from Jem and the Holograms. Beyond was a role-playing-Jem based game that I wrote with two friends. Yahoo closed the game, but these are characters I created. Boris and Vladimir (along with another member Natalia) are a rock group at Starlight Music. The name was given to me by my co-writer. I took it from there and brought them *alive*. They are all from Russia and relatively new to Starlight Music. The flashback I wrote comes from a series of post I wrote before Yahoo kicked us out where Kimber Benton has started a talk show at GEM-TV Studioes.

Boris  
Green Eggs and Ham  
Back at our condo, I walked into Vlad’s room and caught a stray shirt to the head. I could only be glad that it was not his underwear that were flying at me in this storm of garmets. It looked like he had gone quite mad! I cleared my throat, and he glanced up only a brief moment before resuming his search of something.  
“Brother!”  
He greeted not taking his eyes from the piles.  
“Looking for something?”  
I asked in amusement.  
“Did you see my lucky tie? I can not seem to find it anywhere.”  
I walked over to one of his dressers and begin to look through it.  
“Do you remember the last time you wore it??”  
He stopped and considered this.  
“It was when we did the interview for GLITTER magazine or was it the one we did for GLAM magazine?”  
I begin to remove items from his drawer one by one.  
“You know this would not happen if you did not jam everything you own in here?”  
His drawers were beyond stuffed.  
“You are right. I must find the time to hire an assistant.”  
Not exactly what I meant but... I found the tie in question (a black one with silver moons) jammed way in the back, almost causing the drawer to stick.  
“I was wondering why that would not open.”  
He mumbled. Then he started to went to his closet and begin pulling down his luggage from the top shelf. I moved some things to the side and plopped myself down on the bed.  
“Should you not be in bed entering your company?”  
“My company is not in my bedroom. She made it safely home last night.”  
“Then the date did not go well. I am sorry.”  
“You do not measure a date on whether the woman comes home to bed all of the time on the basis that it was good. She is a very nice lady. I enjoyed her company. We went to a late-night lounge. A singer from Misfit’s Music performed and we had a very interesting conversation about spirits and whether we believed them to be the truth.”  
“Then you will see her again?”  
“Yes, I will make another date.”  
I smiled. At Kimber Benton’s talk show, who was the head of our label Starlight Music, one of my other label-mates had asked me out on a date and given me a flower. I could not resist her pretty smile and sweet nature, and the date had been delightful. She was absolutely charming! I had decided that I would like to see more of her. We’d been at Starlight Music for a little while now (something over a year), but still had not gotten a chance to spend time with all of our new family proper. Something I’d always regretted because they’d mostly seemed like a very welcoming bunch.  
“Are you taking a trip that you did not tell us about?”  
His bag finally gave way from the top, and feel down to the floor. A heap of other clothes at the top fell to the floor and the heavy bag hit his foot in the process. I watched as he cursed in Russian and hopped. Then he glanced at the bag and just stood there.  
“I should not. I do not need to drive to Birmingham. What if I can not find where I am? UGG WHY DO I EVEN GIVE A DAMN!”  
I gave him a puzzled look. Birmingham? I asked in confusion.  
“I do not think I get the plan? Why would you want to drive to Birmingham?”  
He slumped down to the floor and laid his head back against the dresser in frustration.  
“I do not want to want this lady? Do you think that I am crazy?”  
I thought back to the previous night right before we went on (and the announcement he made later).  
“Are you ready to go out there?”  
I had asked him.  
“You know I am always ready to do the damn thing.”  
He’d smiled slightly, but there was something off. I knew him too well.  
“You have been quiet tonight. No boasting about how well you wear black silk. No commentary on how the women look tonight in their nightwear and how you intend to take them *all* home with you tonight. There has been not a word from you on how you would treat them to a night of immense pleasure because there is enough of you to go around.”  
I teased him.  
“I am worried. Do we need to take you to see a doctor? I can not remember the last time you were around so much skin and said nothing.”  
He sighed.  
“You are right brother. It is not like me at all to give them the attention they and their beautiful bodies so deserve. I do not know where my head is tonight. I think tho I have messed up. I have been *too* active!”  
*Too Active? *  
I dropped my head. OH GOD! I had feared this when we’d been offered a contract with Starlight. I feared that he would not be able to resist the temptation of all the beautiful women that we’d worked with and not be able to keep it professional, I had just prayed that it would not result in his unintended fatherhood. I had tried to tell him not to fool around with anyone on our label. Obviously, he’d not listened.  
“Vlad.”  
I’d groaned.  
“We have not yet been here a good year. Please do not tell me you’ve got one of them pregnant. It is too scary to think you being the father of a poor, innocent, being.”  
“It is not that. That I know. I do not know quite how to say this. Please do not be offended brother. You know I am committed to the band, and I would not leave. But I have been working on other projects with other artists on the label.”  
“Why would this offend me? I think that it is a good thing! I think that we have not been social enough. I have been thinking of having a house party and inviting the others so they will not find us stand-offish. They have been nothing but accepting of us.”  
He nodded but continued to look forlorn.  
“She (one of the other artists) made me an offer, and I consented to work together on a performance she spoke of coming up. I confess the offer did * excite* me, as she the most gorgeous woman my eyes have seen. But I remembered what you told me about mixing business with pleasure and keeping it in my pants. I did not make any advancements. I swear to you brother. I did not.”  
Weirdly I believed him.  
“It was at a rehearsal. We were practicing the moves and parts begin to touch and rub against each other. Very nice parts, two sets of parts. I was trapped brother! I am telling you. My head said walk away Vladimir! But my body parts they say YES! I LIKE IT! I AM EXCITED! CONTINUE TO DO WHAT YOU ARE DOING! Well, it got VERY hot! One declined and left. The other she was ON FIRE for it. SHE WANTED IT and I let her have it her way right there in the dance studio. She was a BEAST brother! It was like *nothing* I'd experienced. Just thinking of it. I am getting excited again."”  
I groaned Vlad had not an OUNCE of sense! Any of the others could have walked in. JERRICA could have walked in and then she would have called us into a meeting and expressed her displeasure. This was not the impression we needed to make. I looked at Vlad who truly did look sorry. I sighed.  
“Just... I know things happen, but you must be more careful. Starlight Music took a chance on us. I do not need to remind you of everything we have been through in the past. We finally have a good home with Starlight. And Jerrica honestly seems to want to do right by us. Do you want to see that taken?”  
“I do not wish to anger Jerrica. She is far too beautiful to worry about such things. I only wish to *repay* the kindness she has shown.”  
Yeah, I just bet I know what way he wanted to *repay* that kindness.  
“So, then we are agreed? No more fooling around with the other artists. You will keep your commitment as promised, you will apologize for what happened, and then you will tell her it will not happen again. And that you will not mention it.”  
“Oh, brother. If only it was that simple. There was this party and there she was again. We bumped into each other, and I did not wish to offend and be impolite. We talked some of work and other things. She spoke of plans she was determined to bring about. There were drinks. Then it happened again. Only this time we were joined by another hot one! I was not able to resist. I am *never* able to resist!”  
He said angrily.  
“Why is it like this brother? Why does she haunt me? Why can I not resist her hold? Do you think there is a ritual in our books for that?”  
I just shook my head.  
“And what is worse. I find myself .. CRAVING her? Her lips. Her hands. Her graciously blessed parts brushed against me. Her smooth legs wrapped around my waist. The GODS and GODDESSES I plead with you! Help me! I am losing it!”  
“You always get this way when the sex is good. It makes you crazy for a little.”  
I reminded him.  
“Then why do I continue to want her? I have laid with nice bodies before. It is almost like I am OBSESSED with this one. I find myself doing things that do not make sense to me. I call and then hang up because I am not quite sure *why* I am calling. Then when I do reach her, I make up questions about the performance so she will talk because her voice excites me. I look at the pictures on her personal pages and her Starlight page day tovday to know what she is involved in. I thought of having nice flowers delivered at Starlight.”  
“Maybe you *are* developing feelings. There is nothing wrong with this brother. But you must take it slow. You have a tendency to jump into these things will all this FIRE and HEAT. Then when that has died you are left disappointed because you have not gotten to really know them. And you can not base it just on sexual desire. Talk to her. Ask her out on a date where you do not end up at the end of the night naked. Get to know some things about her. What does she like? What are her goals? What are her intentions towards you? Does she even *want* anything other than casual sex?”  
Vlad considered this and said.  
“Yes! I do want more! I am more than just a hot, sexy, body to take as she wants when she wants! I am a *person* with thoughts and feelings and ideas! I am talented. I am creative. I am fun. I am good man. I read.”  
I raised my eyebrows. Well, I guess magazines and comic books counted.  
“There you go!”  
I patted him on the shoulder. Not one to dash his confidence.  
“You have *tons* more to offer than just that.”  
“I should tell her this! I should tell her this right now.”  
He stood to his feet suddenly.  
“NO MORE HOOKUPS! I will tell her. You may not have the milk without putting a down payment on the man-cow.”  
I grabbed his arm to stop him before he marched out the door and up to this woman (who probably didn’t have a clue, he even wanted anything else). Nor probably did she. It sounded like she was only interested in getting offm and he just happened to be her chosen piece to accomplish these means. Other than needing him for whatever performance they were working on.  
“That will have to wait. We are needed on set in a few. I do not wish to play scavenger hunt all over Gem Tv. You do not make for a very good prize.  
Then I thought about what happened later onset. That’s when two and two REALLY hit me. Kimber had asked about our romantic status. Then I got this gem.  
“Well, I can say I am single ladies for you. So if you all would like to give it a go and shoot your shot I am certainly open. You may join in the celebration after the show. I have enough love for each of you. I am not a selfish man. I can be quite *giving*. But I must confess I ma be off the market soon.”  
Kimber's eyes widened.  
“Oh really!? Do tell.”  
Kimber looked ready to pounce on this. I remembered groaning to myself and thinking HERE WE GO! I had tried to catch his eye and hopefully rely to him do NOT do this here. But he just plowed forward.  
“Can you give us a name?”  
Kimber asked.  
“Now what fun would that be?”  
He teased playfully.  
“Well, would you give us a hint?”  
She persuaded to get the answer out of him.  
“And what will you give me in return?”  
He asked teasingly. Could this get any worse? Now not only would we be greeted by a pissed off woman on our label, but Rio would kick something *entirely* different this time for propositioning his new wife. So, I stepped into my usual role and tried to salvage what was sure to be a disaster in the making.  
“I think what Vlad is trying to say is that we value our privacy. Each as a band and individuals. We are ones to kiss and tell. That is the problem with the media. We are *people*, and we have a right to our privacy. Our fans are the reason we do this and we owe them so much for the love and support they have given. All we ask in return is they give us the same and understand if we wish to keep a little to ourselves.”  
I’d thought this sounded a polite and a courteous way to say it is not your business. But then he said.  
“It is ok brother. I do mind telling the truth. Yes, I think I will give you a hint.”  
Gods have mercy. I was thinking. Please let the hint be *REALLY* bad. Then he began to sing a song from a legendary RNB group,, and I wanted to sink through the stage. I knew it could not be LuCinda because she was seeing another labelmate Romeo, and they seemed pretty happy (and in love). Well, at least I thought they were. He wouldn't try to talk to her any way would he? Was he the reason they were having issues. Though I did not see Cinda letting him have her in the dance studio. She always seemed to me so sensible. But I knew how these things could go under the right circumstances. So that left either Reece (the lead singer of Eye Candy) or Caramel. By the looks of those two ladies, I would not wish to cross either. Now it all made sense. The lights were coming on.  
Reece and Cara, I’d heard were sisters. They were both from Birmingham, Alabama.  
“I do not think that you are crazy. Maybe just a tad bit hasty. Do you even have the slightest idea what you’ll say? What if this thing does not go your way?”  
“On her site is a fashion show. What I’ll say I do not know. I do need to go to the Ham. I should save my dignity as a man! I do not need to crawl to her. Damnit my head is all in a blur.”  
He angrily tossed a ball on the floor and it rick a shayed off the wall.  
“She is not even my lover or girl. I am just some man who rocked her world. I do not need to go to the Ham. Let’s go into Starlight today and just jam.”  
“Would you really rather stay *here* or do you really want to go there?”  
I could see this was tearing at him.  
“I don’t want to stay here. I don’t want to go there. I really would just not like to care. Damn it why does she have to be so HOT! I do not like this woman. I do NOT! I do not want her as my girl. She is the type that will only wreck my world. I do not want her as my lover. Tho she is SO damn good under the covers!”  
He gave a little shiver of pleasure. “It is really up to you. I have your back if you want to see this through. Tell me what it is you want to do. We can ride to the Ham or hang at the studio for a few. I have some new material we can try. Before you know it time will fly. Working on music should ease your mind. It will cure your thoughts in no time. But if you really want us to leave I will quickly pack and get my keys. Are we going to the Ham? Let me know what is the plan?”.  
He paced the length of the room throwing the ball off and back up against the wall.  
“Do I need to fill up the car? Birmingham is very far?”  
“Please be quiet! I really need to think. In fact, I think I need a drink. All your questions do not help. I need to think about this thing myself.”  
He snapped irritably.  
“Maybe we could take a train. Then all our gas we would not drain. What time is this fashion show? Maybe Natalia would like to go?”  
I pulled out my cell phone.  
“It says by train will be 9 hours. If we get ready now we’ll have time to get to the station and you can pick up flowers.’  
“I do not need to go to the Ham. What if I find her and I just clam? The thoughts in my head and my tongue will only jam and again I will wham, bam, repeatedly this mam. DAMN! I can not seem to do anything else. Maybe I am just fooling my self. I know that she has many lovers. She does not really need this brother. Maybe it is best I do not speak. She need not know she makes me weak! I will not go to the Ham. Let’s go to Starlight, get our things, and jam.  
I shook my head.  
“You can not let this fear make you not try. Besides, later I do not wish to hear you cry. You are quite ugly when you are sad. You walk around in ratty plaids.”  
Vlad snorted as if the idea was ridiculous  
“Cry for her PLEASE! I do not think so.”  
Then tried to tell me where she could go!  
“Does she not know *who* I am? I am VLADIMIR the man I am. I could have it on a boat. I could have it in a moat. I could have it in the rain. I could have on a train. I could have it against a tree. Who is *she* really to me? She is just another one that I had a little bit of fun. But I can have women ANY TIME ANYWHERE! That is why I do not care!”  
“You do not like her so you say but The Gods may be with you this day. They say that all we have only of them to ask. Ask that for their favor in seeking this path. They will guide you on what to do. Please brother let me come with you. We have nothing at Starlight Music that’s due.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tasha gets a very up-close look at Sheerece's life thanks to advanced technology owned by Kenneth that allows her to relive some very significant moments from the past. The songs used are "I Don't Wanna" by Aaliyah and "Love of My Life" by Brian Mcknight

Tasha  
School's In Session  
I was laying on the bed with my earplugs in, drifting in and out of sleep, when Shereece walked in the room. I lifted myself up to a sitting position. I never knew when she was gonna tell me to get up and make me do something. But instead, she joined me in the bed and just laid there.  
“Your good.”  
She said tiredly. She *looked* tired. I turned my music down. I liked it sorta on the load side.  
“I can go in the other guest room.”  
I offered. The truth was I *really* liked her room. Her bed was so comfortable that all you had to do was lay in it for 5 minutes, and you were out. Then I liked the color scheme. The walls were a loud pink. The bedspread matched the walls perfectly. Almost like the same person had done both. The furniture (bed, night table, drawers, and closets and desk) were all black. So were the frames of the three mirrors that hung on the walls and her shelves full of things she’d either gotten touring with Eye Candy (or presents from her Mom). There were also lots of pictures everywhere. Then every since we’d been here, I noticed something about Shereece being here and in *this* space. She acted more like Shereece the round the way girl, than Reece, the legendary RNB superstar. There was even a big life-sized picture of her crush on the walls.  
“At ease. You can stay. Just go light on the question and answer session please. I just wanna lay here for the rest of the weekend and not move.”  
“I won’t talk. I’ll just read.”  
“Thank you!”  
“Do you want to watch anything, or do you just want me to turn it off?”  
I wondered what kind of television shows Shereece liked. Although probably if I had to guess reality TV. I put it on Growing Up Hip Hop.  
“That’s fine. It’ll probably be watching me in a minute. Oh, uh Dad said something about you wanting to go to Top Golf? If you want me to take you and give you some money just give me a minute to close my eyes for a minute.”  
“That’s ok. This girl from the squad asked me to go but it’s cool. I don’t have to go.”  
“Are you sure? Cause you know if you need something you should never be scared to ask me or anyone for it.”  
“I’m good.”  
I really didn’t need to be getting close to anyone up here. She hadn’t even said anything about the entrance exam I took this morning. Then I don’t know what that girl Halloween’s deal is. At first, when Shereece announced to the squad she wanted me in the show she was cool toward me, but not overly friendly. Before the show, she’s all in my face like she wants to be BFF’s. Nah. Then she was trying to be all up on me like she wanted me, and I don't swing that way. I watched a little of the show quietly, but then I thought of a question. I wondered should I keep it to myself.  
“One question.”  
“Ask.”  
“So, this place Top Golf she said it was new? What did yal use to do to hang out when you lived here?”  
I asked curiously.  
“Skating Rink. There was one in Green Springs. On Fridays and Saturdays, it was lit! Half the night was for actual skating.”  
“What was the other half for?”  
I asked curiously.  
“Grinding.”  
Reece said seriously. Grinding?  
“Like hustling?”  
I heard of someone being on their grind.  
“Like dancing. They’d clear the floor and, about 11 or 10 they’d play popular RNB and HIP HOP. You’d find someone fine you wanted to get up on, and well you can imagine the rest. Pretty decent selection to choose from. Guys from Fairfield High, West End, Wenonah, Parker, Jackson Olin, Huffman, Central Park.”  
“You probably always got picked.”  
“Yeah, I did. Those were the days.”  
She said in remembrance like she missed those days.  
“Were there fights?”  
“Some, but I mean not nearly as bad as it is today. Although there was this 1 kid that went missing for some days, and they found his body in the alley. He wasn’t from my school tho so I didn’t know him personally. I think that high school got closed a while ago.”  
“Is the rink still opened?”  
Shereece snorted.  
“Nothing stays open here because *we* don’t know don’t know how to have anything.”  
“You could change that tho.”  
“ME? How do you think *I’m* supposed to do that? I’m not the Mayor of the City. And even if I was it sounds like a lot of procedures and paperwork. Ain’t nobody got time for all that.”  
“But you could. You could use your influence and make it live like the A. Everybody would wanna come here!"  
Sheerece could do ANYTHING! And there’s no telling what connections she had. She could open up some things here, and it would draw in more people. I was about to tell her she could open the rink back up, and the other ideas I had. But then she distracted me.  
“You did good today!”  
Ok. FINALLY! We were gonna get to what I really wanted to hear. You really impressed me, Tasha! You killed it out there and you aced that entrance exam! I want you to move here so we can work together. Come ON! SAY IT! ! I tried to will the words out of her. I waited.  
“Thank you!”  
“I was very proud of you!’  
Okay. That’s nice! I’m glad I made you proud. I felt a weird surge of pride pop up in my chest. I was thinking I told you I was more than just this little hood rat girl that stole from you that you found in a runaway shelter. But keeping going! But when I looked at her, just that quickly she’d drifted off. I hopped off the bed and left the TV on (in case she was one of those that needed a little noise to fall asleep too). I closed the door behind me and decided to give her some privacy.  
Well, I had at least tomorrow and the next day (maybe some of Monday) before I had to leave to go back to Haven House. Really was not looking forward to that, and quickly tried to dismiss the thought from my head. Somehow, I would find a way to get what I wanted. I always did. Kenneth seemed my best bet. He was softening to me. I could tell. If I could just charm him a little more, I knew he could convince her.I stepped into the hallway and looked around. This house had so many rooms in it. You could fit my whole 5 room apartment back home in 1 of these rooms. Seriously this place needed to come with a map or something. So I just started opening random doors. I opened a door that looked like a gym. Then there was one that looked like it held nothing but model trains and cars. Then there was a room full of books (library). At the end of the hall, I finally found him sitting in a big room full of video game stuff. I looked around at the cases of ancient game systems, the walls of games, and the massive 4K TVs hanging side by side. There was even an arcade game by the left wall. He was so absorbed in his game; he didn’t even notice me when I walked in. He was wearing a pair of black Goggles. He must be doing one of those virtual reality games. I plopped down on the leather couch next to him. When he felt the weight shift, that got his attention and he took the goggles off.  
“Hey.”  
He said with a smile. I gave him a smile back.  
“Hey Paw Paw. Whatcha doing?”  
I asked cutely.  
“Guilty pleasure. Helps me unwind. You haven’t been here long have you? I can get so wrapped up in this stuff half the day will have passed.”  
“What are you playing?”  
“It’s a new VR system called INFINITY that just came out and it is... here. I don’t think I could do it justice in words.”  
He slipped the Goggles on over my head. The game was like nothing I’d ever seen. It had thousands of simulated worlds. He explained.  
“Not only can you explore and create worlds it gives you access to a library of tv shows, songs, video games, movies books. It’s genius really, and the subscription fee is really low. I think like 5.00 a month. I have a special access key that lets me see it all for free. I won it in a contest.”  
He said proudly.  
“And do you know what the coolest thing is about it?”  
I shook my head. Like the thing wasn’t freaking cool enough as it was. This was better than The Sims. From one of the cases, Kenneth retrieved another pair of goggles and put them on his own head. Then it was like somehow, we were synced. I was seeing what he was seeing. A bunch of titles scrolled in front of my eyes. I caught the names of some of them “Birth” “Party1” “Kindergarten.” “Pagent." Show”. Kenneth explained.  
“With this system, I was able to take all the video footage I had over the years on all the VHS tapes, digital cameras, and cell phones and scan them all into this system. Shereece told me that you wanted to see some of the old tapes her mother and I had over the years. Well, it’s all here! You won’t find a better reference.”  
“There’s so many.”  
I said reading through the menu of files. He laughed.  
“Yeah. You can blame me for that, I guess. Her mother traveled a lot and I tried to keep her updated. Shereece couldn't stand it. Drover her crazy."  
Interesting! The Shereece I knew loved nothing more than being filmed and photographed.  
“Can we watch some?”  
“Yeah. Might as well start at the beginning.”  
He selected the title “Birth”. Then what happened next left me feeling like what the hell. I was no longer in *this* house, but a smaller one. WHOA! I was viewing the inside of a bedroom with a green and gold floral theme. On the bed sat a stunning woman with her long loose hair in a pretty ponytail. But her hazel eyes looked very fierce and very angry. If I didn't know any better I swear I was the one she was glaring at. She had one a nice, green, coat, but when she spoke the voice did not match the rest. It was soft, baby-like, and had a foreign accent.  
“Kenneth if you do not put down that camera and go put the bags in the car. I will shove that thing.”  
“I’m sorry baby. But I just can’t get over how beautiful you look right now.”  
And I had to admit for someone who was about to have a baby she did look like she was ready to go walk the runway. Her hair looked like she’d just gotten it done yesterday. Her makeup was perfect. I sure the hell wouldn’t be thinking about slaying on the way to deliver a baby. The only thing that would be on my mind is getting the thing out of me. The lady rolled her eyes and snapped irritably.  
“Yes! Why don’t we just call the photographers up and have a spread for Vogue shot from our BEDROOM because that is where the baby will be born if you do not get your ass out to the car with my bags. Do I have to do everything myself? Never mind. I will take them and bring myself. Do I also need to DRIVE?”  
How was I seeing this? I wondered. I know he’d explained it to me, but this should *not* be possible. I continued to watch in fascination. Kenneth (the 20-sum-year-old version) jumped up and grabbed the bags from his wife’s hands and stuck them over his shoulder. Somehow managing to still open the door for her with one hand and film her walking backward the whole time. He followed her down the hallway, down the stairs, and into the garage. He then opened the car door for her, took her arm, (which she shrugged off), and then put the bags in the back. He sat the camera on the back seat, and he must have left it recording He backed the car out and turned into the street. For a minute there was a tense silence.  
“How are you feeling love?”  
“I am feeling as if I am about to have a baby.”  
“It’s gonna be ok boo. We’ll be there at Saint Vincent's in a minute.”  
“I do not know how I allowed you to talk me into this.”  
She mumbled and turned her gaze out the window. He reached across to touch her hand, he clasped her fingers in his and squeezed it. Then he gave her a lovey-dovey look.  
“Your gonna do *fine* baby. You’ll see. I know you're scared. I’m scared too. But your gonna make an amazing mommy. My baby is about to have my baby.”  
“I did not want this Kenneth. I told you I did not. *You* wanted this! And then my family is not here. My mother is not here. My sister is not here. My Father is not *here*! I want to see my family. I need to be with my family Kenneth.”  
“Hey! It was gonna be a surprise but your mother and your sister will be arriving tonight. I’ll go to the airport and pick them up, and we’ll come straight to the hospital.”  
“They will be here tonight?”  
It was the only thing that seemed to brighten the lady’s mood.  
“They should be in flight as we speak. See love. I told you I got you! You don’t have to worry about anything. The only thing I want you to concentrate on is bringing our daughter into this world and let your man take care of the rest.”  
I saw the briefest flicker of a smile but it didn’t last.  
“I hope you remembered to pack my Bamboo sheets. They are made from home. I will not submit myself and our baby to lie in the filth that passes for bed covering at these hospitals. They are all covered in germs and no telling what else. They are nothing like the hospitals back home. I bet there will be a ton of silly forms to fill. If we were home we would not need to do this. We would be rushed straight back to ER. This is why we should be there.”  
She said stubbornly. He sighed like here we go but said nothing.  
“I do not see what objections you have. We can sell the house. We can get a bigger one. It is not like you do not have the money. We can get a 4-bedroom 5 bath double exposure apartment twice the size of that house. You can find work. I can return to work. I want to work. I miss it. I do not like sitting around the house feeling as tho I do nothing all day but watch television. I have seen the same shows over and over."  
He remained silent. She pouted.  
“You said you would take care of me. You said you wanted me to be happy did you not? Why do you get to be happy and I have to?”  
“You have to what?”  
He said voice rising a little bit. Then he softened it. She crossed her arms.  
“Baby look. I do want to make you happy. You know that but it’s a lot to think about. I’m just not ready to re-locate right now all the way to Paris. I haven’t even been at the hospital *that* long. Making that kind of move will take money and time. We’d have to find a place and when we finish paying for it then what until I can get hired on at one of the hospitals there?”  
“You just not want me to be happy. You know it will not take long to hire you.”  
Ok, this lady was a brat I thought, and a little bit on the snob side. It had to be driving him crazy the way she kept bringing up that everything in Paris was better. He said.  
“Just give me another year ok. Then we can make some moves. If that really is what you want."  
“It *IS* what I want.”  
The rest of the way they rode in silence. He flipped on the radio to a hip-hop station. She flipped it to a classical station. I could not get over how surreal this all seemed. I wondered had Shereece seen this. I always had the sense that my own mother would have been happier had I never been born, but to actually hear this lady *say* it out loud. Then I wondered should I take the goggles off because I felt like I was intruding on his personal life. But he hadn’t stopped the recording or fast-forwarded any of it so he must be ok with me seeing it. The next thing I saw was them pulling up at Saint Vincent hospital and him rushing to the front to get a wheelchair to take her inside. The scene skipped to her in the hospital room having an argument with one of the nurses who handed her one of the hospital gowns. She looked at the lady like bitch, please.  
“I do not know what you expect me to do with that.”  
She turned up her nose.  
“Well if you don’t mind getting changed into it then the Dr. will be in presently.”  
“I do mind and I will not be changing into *that*. I have brought my own gown thank you.”  
“But mam. It’s procedure.”  
“Do I look as if I care about your *procedures*? I SAID I will be changing into my own gown. THANK YOU! THAT WILL BE ALL! KENNETH DON’T YOU DARE FILM ME CHANGING!!”  
For someone with such a small voice, this lady sure could project it when she needed to. So, this was Shereece’s mother. Interesting! He must have stopped the recording because it went black for a minute. I wondered what was going through Paw Paw’s head as he re-lived all this on the eve of the death of his wife’s anniversary. Well, one thing was fa sho I thought as the recording begin I am NEVER getting pregnant. Because now I was watching Bianca screaming to the top of her lungs, legs spread, and cursing out the Dr and her husband in French.  
“Just one more push Mrs. Jamison. You are almost there.”  
“Come on baby. We got this!”  
Kenneth coached from the side in green scrubs.  
“WE! WE! I DON’T SEE YOUR ASS IN THIS BED PUSHING SOMETHING THE SIZE OF A LARGE PIECE OF FRUIT FROM YOUR….. “  
The next thing I knew I was looking at a small, squirmy, red thing, covered in blood. It hollered just as loud as the woman who’d just delivered it. Looking like it didn’t wanna be here no more than the mother wanted it here. The Dr. wrapped it up, toweled it off, and placed it in the mother’s arms who looked at it like now what. Kenneth came over and kissed his wife on the forehead and was grinning like he’d won the lottery. I removed the Googles slowly cause YEEEAH. That was A LOT!  
“TMI?”  
He asked teasingly.  
“I didn’t know it would be that. I felt like. I was *there*.”  
I honestly felt a little dazed.  
“I know right. I needed a minute to the first time I saw one of the recordings. The one when we were married. I ain’t gone lie. It got me all in my feelings. I had to put em down for a minute.”  
“How much do they cost?”  
“These go for 10 grand."  
I could see why.  
“Was she a good baby?”  
“She was a very active baby. She could be fussy, but I think you can see where she got that from. She was always into everything and kept us * very* busy.”  
“You didn’t want to move to Paris.”  
“No, and I’ll tell you exactly why.”  
He removed his Goggles and sat them on the couch.  
“So, a lot of things are gonna come out when the biopic is made. There are things that as a family she and I need to sit down and talk about that will be shown that will probably get some backlash, and I know how these things tend to be exaggerated. I know she’ll try to keep it as close to the truth as possible. But it’s important to me that the people I care about know the truth. The rest don’t concern me. You want to know why I didn’t want to go to Paris. When I married my wife, I changed. I was *READY* to be a husband. I meant every line of those vows. Forsaking all others. A-lot of *people* in my life I had to let go of. I couldn’t do the things I use to do when I was single. I didn't want to. My wife *however*…”  
He paused.  
“And maybe it was my fault. I always knew she was ready. She told me as much. She was hesitant to even accept my proposal. I’m not even sure why she did. But looking back on it again I probably wasn’t trying to hear nothing else. I just thought I could erase all her doubts cause she was with ME. How could she go wrong? I guess you see where "Reece" gets her arrogance from. GUILTY! You couldn’t tell me I wasn’t the man back then. A year into our marriage, I noticed our phone bill was steadily increasing. I’d catch her on the phone sometimes talking in French, and I just thought it was her mom or her sister or her family. My French wasn’t all that great. I could catch a few words. But what I did was (unknown to her) I started to teach myself French, I was starting to get this bad feeling. I learn pretty quick and I learned enough to understand her conversations.  
“You speak French?”  
“Oui je peux parler français et assez couramment.” (Yes, I can speak French and quite fluently), Shereece can speak it too when she chooses. I learned it to understand what she was saying on the phone. Bianca insisted that Shereece learn the language so that when she took her to visit her side she wouldn’t embarrass her. I don’t know. It was a big deal to her that she knew both sides of who she was.”  
“And you caught her saying bad stuff on the phone?”  
“DID I? She was in our room one time and I guess she thought I was at work. But what I heard out of my wife's mouth (he shook his head). That may have been our first real fight. I marched in, snatched the phone out of her hand, and we got into it. Of course, she cried and pleaded that it was just an old friend, and that she was sorry and that she missed home so much. That it meant nothing. That she would not talk to him again. And eventually, I caved.”  
‘Did she? Did she stop?”  
Kenneth snorted.  
“Maybe she stopped talking to *that* one, but there were MANY others. And that’s why I did not want to move to Paris because it wasn’t her *family* she missed so much. It was her many other lovers and the lifestyle I’d taken her away from that she missed.”  
He sighed.  
“She would look herself in the bathrooms and have whispered conversations with one of her the models she claimed was a friend but was really the woman back home that she loved. I should have just let her go. I always knew that’s where she *really* wanted to be.”  
“But she must have loved you. She *married* you and she agreed to move here.”  
“I don’t know. I really wanna believe that. But part of me just felt like she was using me for whatever reason. Maybe to make her lady jealous. Maybe because she saw an opportunity to come up and she took it. Maybe she just saw it as a challenge then she got bored. Now I have to go to this fashion show tomorrow and get up in front of all these people and say something. I’m not even sure what I’m gonna say. It all just feels like..”  
He leaned back tiredly.  
“You can talk about what you loved about her. Tell them what made you fall for her. Tell them about the good memories you had with her. You can pick one that stands out.”  
I picked up the Goggles and put them back on. Then I started with my finger through the air like I saw him do,  
“Are all these just of Shereece?”  
The files seemed to go on and on. I had an idea.  
“Most of them are, but some of the ones I have of my wife’s fashion shows and some of our special occasions.”  
"Show me one of your good memories!"  
He put his Goggles back on and picked a title that said “ANNIVERSARY YR ONE”. When the recording started I was looking at them both again. This time she was in a stunning, floor-length gown that looked like it was painted on. She wore tall, 8inch heels. She was blindfolded and being lead by the hand.  
“Kenneth, what in the world. I do not think I can walk much further in these shoes. Where are you taking me?”  
“Woman, please. I’ve seen you do 5-hour shows in heels higher than that. We’re almost there.”  
He laughed.  
“You know I do not care for surprises.”  
“You will like this one. I promise.  
He led her into the door of a huge arena. It was filled with all kinds of petals on the floor. In the center of the large floor space sat a single table and a chair. Even though the room was empty and dark, a single, soft, pink, spotlight illuminated the space. Another light clicked on and there was a stage in front. He guided her to the chair and pulled it out for her.  
“Ok Kenneth this is all very amusing but can I please take off the blindfold now.”  
“Aww, what’s the matter boo. You *scared* of the dark?”  
“I am not scared. This is just silly. Unless the surprise is you have flown in a Chief from home to prepare me an authentic meal I would like to go eat now. I am hungry. I thought we were going to a restaurant.”  
“Oh. I’ll give you something that will fill you up alright. But later. What I got for you is *way* better than that.”  
“I am waiting!”  
And then I heard.  
FIRST, FIRST TIME I LOOKED INTO YOUR EYES  
I SAW HEAVEN, OH, HEAVEN IN YOUR EYES  
EVERYTHING I DID BEFORE YOU, WASN’T WORHT MY WHILE  
IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU, YOU ALL THE TIME.  
ILL DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO PLEASE YOU  
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I NEED YOU  
YOUR ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ON MY MIND.

YOUR MORE THAN WONDERFUL  
MORE THAN AMAZING  
THE IRREPLACEABLE, LOVE, LOVE OF MY LIFE  
YOUR SO INCREDIBLE, HERE IN THESE ARMS TONIGHT  
THE IRREPLACEABLE LOVE LOVE OF MY LIFE  
He didn’t… But there he was right in front of my eyes. My mother use to practically be ready to rip off her underwear every time she heard this guy. I took off my goggles and so did he.  
“Yeah, I did that.”  
He said.  
“She *loved* that guy. I had to pull *a lot* of strings to set all that up.”  
“I hope she appreciated it.”  
“See for yourself.”  
He let the rest of the recording play, and I watched as she first tried to process what she heard. Probably thinking it was a recording. Then he removed the blindfold, and she took in the stage and the legendary singer standing (now) directly in front of her. She blinked and did a double-take. Then this look of rapture come over her face and she leaned over and kissed her husband. I think I actually heard her squeal. I watched as he finished that song and lead her to the floor to dance with him as he performed “The Only One For Me.” Then I watched her dance with Paw Paw as he went into “Never Felt This Way.” She truly did look different from the recording before. She looked happy.  
“That was really nice Paw Paw!”  
I said softly. I wondered would a guy ever do something like that for me.  
“I have my moments.”  
He said teasingly.  
“I can actually be a pretty good guy when I wanna be.”  
“She was lucky.”  
I told him seriously. The guys I’d been out ideas of romance was taking you to a movie, making out with you in the theatre, and trying to hit in their cars afterward.  
“Well, it took me a while to get there. I had to get knocked around a little, but I think I'm finally getting this thing down."  
He said modestly.  
“Can we watch some more?”Tasha  
I"Absolutely! I haven’t thought about some of these things in so long. But it’s getting late and I need to feed my ladies. You don’t want to see Shereece if she wakes up and doesn’t eat. So what’ll it be? Eat out? Eat-in? Delivery or I can pick something up? What’s your favorite restaurant?”  
I thought about it.  
“What does Shereece like?”  
She’d had a long week after all. Plus I was good with whatever.  
“Shereece’s favorite is Olive Garden.”  
“Then we can eat that.”  
“Excellent idea! Then knowing her she’s not gonna wanna get all dressed up to go out tonight. I think I can pick something up. Do you know what you’d want?”  
I took out my new phone he’d upgraded me to. The iPhone X. I pulled up the Olive Garden menu and choose cheese Ravioli. Kenneth said he knew Reece would want the shrimp scampi and he’d get the Lasagna and we all could share. He’d get the breadsticks and some salad. It started to pour a little so he said I could stay there and he’d go get the food. He said he'd be back as quick as he could. When he left the house was quiet. I picked up the Goggles again fascinated with the new toy. I flipped through some more file titles and choose one called “PAGENT”  
I was looking backstage at what looked like an auditorium in a school. Some of the girls were fussing around in the mirror. Then I saw Shereece. She looked like she was about my age. Her hair was in an updo and she had on a gorgeous, halter, style, pink gown. Kenneth stepped through the door and said.  
“There she is!”  
She turned around.  
“Wow! Is that *really* my baby girl? I just can’t get over how much you look like your mother.”  
Shereece rolled her eyes and turned back to face the mirror not looking at him. He sat down a small, silver, box in front of her and a single pink rose.  
“She asked me to give you this?”  
“So which one is it this time?"”  
She mumbled and didn’t touch the box.  
“You know your Grandma hasn’t...”  
He started, but she cut him off.  
“Save it, Daddy. We both know there’s nothing from with Ma. Ma. You think she’d be better at this by now.”  
“She really *did* want to be here. She felt *terrible* that she was called last minute."  
“If she really wanted to be here she’d be *here*.”  
Shereece snapped.  
“Why do you even stay with her anyway? She's never here. She couldn't even find it her schedule to see you accept your award last night. She doesn't care about either one of us. All she cares about is her self."  
He changed the subject.  
“Are you nervous?”  
She just shrugged.  
“Cause just between you and me from what I see. I think you got this.”  
“I don’t know. Jaime has danced with Corky Bell since she was 3 years old. Ballet, Jazz, Tap, Modern. Dance and Bella already has offers after her to play the for the Alabama Symphony.”  
“But you have something they *don’t* have.”  
“If your gonna say something like I have the love of two parents that care about me just don’t."  
“Well you do have that, but that’s not what I was gonna say.”  
“Ok. Well, what do I have?”  
“You have "the gift". You have it. I have it. Your Grandma had it.”  
“I can sing ok.”  
“No! See that's where your *wrong* baby girl. You don’t just sing *okay*. You just haven’t tapped into the full power of our gift yet. Cause when you hit that full range. You’re gonna know it. That voice inside of you is gonna be your most powerful weapon and it’ll be a force that gonna make you unstoppable! And I have a feeling that tonight’s gonna be that night. And that’s why your gonna win.”  
I saw a lady come in and walk over to them.  
“Shereece your up next.”  
“Thank you, Miss Kelly.”  
“I’ ma gonna be right out front. YOU GOT THIS!”  
When the recording started again I was sitting in the front row of the auditorium. I listened as she was announced. Then she walked out and the lights dimmed. A spot light shone done on her and the music started.  
YEAH  
MMMM  
WHOA  
OH YEAH  
WHEN WE HOOKED UP WE SAT DOWN  
MADE AN AGREEMENT WE VOWED THAT  
WE’D ALWAYS BE TOGETHER THROUGH WHATEVER  
WE SAID THAT NO ONE WOULD EVER GET BETWEEN US  
THIS LOVE WOULD NEVER EVER LEAVE US  
THAT WAS A WHILE AGO  
BUT NOW LATELY IT FEELS LIKE  
I MEAN I FEEL LIKE ALL WE DO IS FIGHT  
EVERY SINGLE NIGHT  
CAN'T MAKE IT TIGHT, CANT GET IT RIGHT  
I JUST WANNA GO BACK, TAKE IT WAY BACK  
ALL THE WAY BACK, CAN WE START AGAIN  
DO IT OVER, CAN WE STRAIGHTEN IT OUT  
CAN WE WORK IT OUT  
CUZ I DON’T WANNA BE  
BE WITHOUT YOU, BE WITHOUT YOU  
I DON’T WANNA GO  
GO WITHOUT YOU, GO WITHOUT YOU  
I DON’T WANNA BE ALONE  
By the time she got to the last lines, tears were running down her face but she didn’t break tune.  
HOW CAN THIS BE (THAT ITS NOT WORKING OUT)  
THAT’S ITS NOT WORKING OUT  
WE VOWED TO BE ALWAYS TOGETHER  
ITS HURTING ME THAT WE DON’T TALK NO MORE  
ITS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS WAY  
WHERE DID WE GO WRONG  
WE BOTH MADE MISTAKES BUT WE GOTTA CARRY ON.  
She finished the song to standing applause. Everyone was on their feet and cheering. She was crying. He was crying. *I* was crying. I took the Goggles off and just sat there a minute feeling the tears in my own eyes. I had the weirdest feeling like I ought to go to Shereece and apologize. But for what I didn’t know. I wiped my eyes on my sleeve and hopped down off the couch, I had to step away from those Goggles for a minute. Their power was WAY too great! I’d come back to them maybe later. I peeped my head back in Shereece’s room, and she was still knocked out.I walked over and plopped myself down at her desk. I wondered was there any candy in this place. I hadn’t had any since I left Haven House. I found my purse, picked it up, and rummaged through it, but there wasn’t even any gum in it. Disappointed I dropped my purse to the floor. Maybe she had some stashed in one of these drawers. A little voice in my head told me maybe it's not right to go poking through other people’s drawers, but the other voice that was having a candy with drawl convinced me other-wise. Besides now I was curious. I yanked open the first one, and out of guilt I guess turned around to look at her. She didn’t stir. In the first one was what looked like a row of colorful journals standing up. Interesting! She didn’t strike me as someone that would have diaries. Underneath that was a whole stack of what looked like letters and notes that were faded from old age on loose-leaf paper. Hmm, I picked up one of the diaries. I glanced back at her again. Well, she did agree I should come here to do some research. So I flipped it open. It was all about this Harlem guy and the first time she saw him. A picture fell out and I picked it up. He was kinda fine tho!  
*So, my girls have been telling me about this new guy they saw at the basketball court down the street, and they been seriously losing their minds. They won’t shut up about how bad they gone be the first ones to get at him. I gotta admit I am kinda curious! I haven’t really seen anyone since Q, and what a waste of my time that turned out to be. I hope he and that red-headed bitch are happy. He tried to call me up to*check on me* this summer. I’m SO OVVER IT! Today I found out what all fuss was about. I was hanging out with the rest of the squad in the gym when he and some other guys came in to try out for the basketball team, and I thought WELL DAMN! He was the most *delicious* set of lips. I can not wait to see what they feel like all over me, and make the rest of them feel STUPID as hell when I make him mine! SORRY NOT SORRY! I already know he's going to be my first.  
I was about to read some more when I glanced up and saw a long, gold, envelope on the desk. So I sat the diary down and picked that up. Inside were a bunch of sketches. I flipped through them. They were REALLY good! I didn’t know Shereece could draw like that. But they needed something. I pulled open the top drawer of the desk and found some glitter. That would do. I only meant to add a little glitter to make the sketches sparkle a little, but I ended up accidentally bumping the container with the glitter on it and it spilled unto the desk and the sketches. OOPS!I tried to clean up the mess best I could with some tissue I found on the desk. Then I quickly stuck the drawings back in the gold envelope. The doorbell rang, and I hopped up to go get it before it woke her up. I paused at the door. I knew I wasn’t supposed to answer the door for strangers, but then Paw Paw appeared from behind me. When had he got back?  
“Were you expecting someone?”  
He asked me. I shook my head. Like I knew anyone here to expect. He opened the door and exclaimed.  
“Hey! I didn’t know you were coming? What are you doing here?”  
I saw another man, a little older, brown-skinned, shorter. They hugged. Then I saw Cinda and two other girls.  
“I thought you might need us.”  
The man said simply. Kenneth hugged Cinda and the other two girls.  
“And you brought my beautiful nieces.”  
Oh, so this was his brother.  
“Big brother, Cinda, Step, Jess I want yal to meet my grand-baby Tasha.”  
Cinda smiled.  
“We’ve met. Ah didn’t know you’d be here.”  
“I performed at the pep-rally!”  
I said proudly.  
“And she was the best one on the floor!”  
Paw Paw exclaimed.  
“You don’t say. Brother, you’ve been holding back on me.”  
He laughed.  
“Yal come in. I’ll get your bags and take them upstairs. Are yal hungry? I just brought back Olive Garden. I had a feeling I’d be needing more than I initially planned to get.”  
So we invited them in and I got them all plates and we all sat down to watch the video Paw Paw made of me and Reece at the pep-rally.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucinda thinks back on events of the past year which include a meeting with a mysterious stranger, shocking revelations at Kimber and Rio's wedding, the break up of her RNB group (Eye Candy), the announcement of her mother's illness, Eye Candy's debut performance, and her invitation to join the group. The wedding scene was co-written with friends Elly and Kelly for the RPG (Beyond) on Yahoo Groups. The flashbacks were edited and extended beyond the original posted on Yahoo Groups.

LuCinda: Reflections  
Ah didn’t think in a couple of days from performing to Kimber’s show in LA, to moving back home to Savannah, Georgia, I’d be on the road again headed to Birmingham Alabama. Things had all been such a whirlwind these last months. It all started when Kimber Benton invited us to her wedding to Rio Pacheco. Who’d ever think that from such a happy occasion things would go downhill so quickly? Maybe it was Eric Raymond or Ace or whoever he was calling himself these days that brought all the bad luck. That man has been nothing but trouble ever since we signed our contracts to Starlight Music. Then there were the Misfits themselves. Ah never had much to do with any of em. Jetta just seemed as manipulative and conniving as Eric, and Pizzazz just had this vibe like she’d stab you in the back with a double-edged blade for power. And then there was *that* night.

The night I never told a soul about. Not Cara. Not Reece. At the time things were rocky between us. It was right after our big New Zeeland tour. Things were already tense with us. Cara was starting to do her own thing and work on other things outside the group, which pissed Reece off because she thought EC should be our first, last, and ONLY priority 24-7. It was almost like she had something to prove and Cara was fed up with it (and her). So, she became more and more distant. She’d come to practice and rehearsals late (that is if she showed up at all). Then it didn’t help when Reece ended up in the hospital and plans for the group were put on hold while she was unconscious. 

As always, I (the sweetheart EC) found myself in the middle and trying to keep them from killing one another. I wasn’t happy with the way things were, but when I stepped on that stage and I saw how happy we made all our fans, it all just seemed to disappear. That is until we were back in the same space and the arguments started again. Ah was really scared for us, but I convinced myself it would be ok. Reece and Cara just needed a little space I told myself. Sister’s go through it sometimes. Lord knows I have with the 4 of mine. Although ah I love them to death. The night I meet the love of my life (Romeo B *the* HOTTEST RNB super, star, on Starlight’s label), ah was more than ready to cut loose, and just let all that stress out. Ah was ready to be someone else entirely. So I turned myself into well a combination of the two women I admired the most (Cara and Reece). 

I went out to Fredrick’s of Hollywood type store and bought the sexiest, steam-punk inspired, corset I could find and leather pants so tight ah’m not even sure how I got into them. I’d even let a little thong show. I topped off the look with a long, vinyl, trailing, leather jacket, and 12-inch thigh-high boots., a mask, and a whip. She had long hair down to her waist and green cat eyes. That night I was every man’s FANTASY. That woman was HOT! She was BOLD! She took what she wanted and didn’t give a damn about the consequences. SHE WAS WILD AND SEXY! That woman drew you in like a drug, YOU WANTED HER cause she was all up in your system, but get too close to she’d whup your tail because she wasn’t looking for a man (or anyone). Being her was such a HIGH! Higher than the most potent marijuana out there. 

Ro likes to tell the story that (that’s) the night he fell for me. But that’s not the only thing that happened that night. I thought back. I had pulled into my space at our condo. I still hadn’t come down from the adrenaline pulsating through me. There was a long, lime, limo sitting in front of the house. I’d wondered who it belonged to as it wasn’t prom season. I know some of the other residents in our condominiums had teenagers. As I got out of the car, I started toward my unit. A guy in a black suit, top hat, and white gloves got out and called to me.

“Miss Lucinda Duboise?”

I turned around.

“Yes.”

I said curiously (and a little wearily). I was close enough to my unit in case I needed to make a run for it if his intent was to try to grab me, snatch me up, and force me in the limo. I put my hand discreetly around the taser in my jacket. 

“My employee requests your presence this evening.”

“Employee?”

“Yes, mam!”

Alright! I’d play along.

“Do I have time to change?”

He nodded briefly. I wasn’t sure what this thing was all about, but I was curious. And besides ah really didn’t have anything else to do tonight and I was still feeling up for a little adventure. Ah didn’t feel any evil intent from the driver. If his intent was to kidnap me he would have by now. As I pulled on an Eye Candy shirt, cut off denim shorts, sneakers, and an old jacket that had once belonged to my fiancée, a little voice in the back of my head (possibly my mother’s) was scolding me 

“LuCinda, what did I tell you about accepting rides from strangers! You don’t know this man, and your really going to get in his car and let him take you God knows where? Are you *trying* to end up like those girls on the news that you read about?” 

I sshed the voice. Ah was a grown-ass woman now with 2 platinum-selling CDS. The days when I needed *anybody’s* permission, I’d left behind me years ago. So, I locked up and accepted the opened door the driver held out for me. I rode in silence staring out the window as the streets and LA’s nightlife passed by. Before I knew it, we were pulling up to what looked like a small, private, hanger. The driver parked, got out again, and opened my car door.

“This way Mrs. Duboise.”

He instructed. The next thing I knew I found myself boarding a plane that had lots of purple interior. Maybe I should have been shocked by it all, but I just leaned back in my seat and settled myself in for the flight. Putting distance between me and LA seemed like a good idea at the time. Hours later when the plane touched down, I found myself being escorted from the plane and informed by another different driver.  
“  
Your reservations have been made mam. We will be arriving at the Magic Kingdom momentarily.”

“Thank you!”

I said. Whoever wanted to meet with me sure had gone all out! To my amazement, we pulled up to the Walt Disney World parking lot even though it was way past closing time. Surely, we weren’t gonna enter the deserted park! They’d *arrest us*. Ah know I wanted an adventure, but this wasn’t quite what I had in mind. Cinderella’s Castle stood tall and imposing in front of me, still looking every bit as magical if not slightly eerie. The driver got out promptly and opened the door for me. I just stood there for a second stunned. 

“Is there a problem Miss?”

He asked.

“The park is closed.”

I said confused. No one could want to meet me here at this hour. I started to get the feeling that maybe this *was* a mistake. Or some kind of practical joke. I turned to the driver and asked suspiciously.

“Who exactly am ah supposed to be meeting with again?”  
“  
My instruction was only to get you settled into your suite tonight Miss.”

Oh kaaay! I thought. This was getting stranger and stranger. We got to the park’s gates, and even though they were closed they magically opened (although no Cast Member) was behind the ticket booth. Cinderella’s carriage appeared and I was escorted inside. The driver nodded to me a farewell and exchanged places with the Coachman who opened the door for me. Soon we were riding up Main Street. So *this* is what the Magic Kingdom looked like after dark. What a story this would make to tell Delta, the next time I get to talk to her. It suddenly hit me that I hadn’t heard from my girl in a while. A very silly thought hit me as I rode past Town Hall. Ah once read this book where a guy woke exactly where I was at night. Only to find that an old guy had turned him into a hologram, and he was able to see the characters (who were all too real). I glanced down at my arm. 

It didn’t seem to have a glow. I tried to see if I’d catch Goofy or Chip and Dall running past me down the street. The carriage pulled up to the Castle and the Coachman let me out. A Cast Member then greeted me at the entrance of the Castle.

“We’ve been expecting you. I’ll show you to your suite.”

She said kindly.

“You must be tired. Everything has been prepared.”

“Thank you!”

I said as I followed her to the ornate elevator that was decorated like the inside of the carriage with its pumpkin vines and golden walls. She pushed the button to the 3rd floor. 

“Do you know who made these arrangements?”

w“All I can say is that they really must think your special. This room is one of the Castle’s hidden secrets that not that many know about as of yet. You’re one of the first to stay here.”  
Could Romeo have done all this? Our eyes had met during the performance and in his eyes, it was clear he wanted me. We stepped out of the elevator unto a mosaic on the floor of the gold, pumpkin, coach. If it hadn’t been so late ah quite possibly would have taken m’ ah cell phone and snapped pictures of everything. In the entryway was a trophy case where signature trinkets from Cinderella’s story. I saw her slipper, her coronation crown and scepter, and a glass pumpkin. I looked around at the three, original, pieces of concept art on the wall.

“Ah really get to stay here?”

I asked in awe. She smiled at me.

“That’s right!”

She led me into the bedroom which had two large beds. 

“There’s something to sleep in in the top drawer. Breakfast is served at 7:00. If you’d like you can always order up room-services. There are menus in the desk drawer there. The tv is here (showed me) in this frame. After showing me around the parlor and bathroom, I thanked her and she wished me good night. I just sat there on the bed and let it all wash over me that I, LuCinda Duboise was really *here* at the Magic Kingdom in Cinderella’s Castle in a hidden suite. And I had an 8-year-old Lucinda moment and squealed and threw myself back on the bed. Ah, ’m afraid ah can’t tell you much after that because sleep took me, and I crawled between the covers and fell asleep in my clothes. 

The next morning, I received an invitation to meet that night at midnight at Club 33. Ah had to sit down for that. Club 33 was an exclusive, private, membership club. Ah was well known but ah heard you needed LOTS of money and social standing, and LUCK to even find the place. Wow! I thought as I read the invite over and fingered the special key card to allow me access to the location. I’m invited to Club 33 and ah don’t even have anything to wear, I thought glancing down at my cut off shorts, sneakers, and EC tee shirt. Since this whole thing had been so spur of the moment ah hadn’t really brought anything with me so ah had no money to buy a new dress, and I heard Club 33 had a very strict dress policy.

On a hunch, I went to the closet in my room and pulled open the doors. When I saw the dress I gasped. It was *the* most beautiful gown ah think ah’d ever seen. I reached for it carefully almost as if it would disintegrate in my hands like in the movie. It was a beautiful, ice-blue, with a full skirt, that came off the shoulders. When I tried it on it fit PERFECTLY!

Later that night (again after the parks closed) I found myself making my way to Adventure Land to the hidden (in plain sight) Club 33 door (thanks to YouTube). I rang the doorbell (with knots in my stomach) and I heard a voice say.

“Club 33 how may I help you?”

I said.

“I have reservations for LuCinda Duboise.”

“One moment please.”

Ah actually got the thought in my head that OMG ah’m about to meet my Prince! As crazy as that sounded. Since ah joined Eye Candy and left m’ ah old life behind, it was so ironic that when ah use to dream off the day ah had freedom from m’ ah mom and do what I wanted, now that ah could date there just never seemed to be time for it. There had been a very, nice, guy in Germany that gave me roses after a concert and invited me to dinner that I regret I couldn’t have anything with. The night had been so special and so romantic, but we both knew it couldn’t be anything further. It was the hardest good-bye ah think ah ever had to say. Vance was everything ah think ah’d ever wanted and it had taken me months not to cry myself to sleep. My heart leaped. Could it be him waiting for me behind the doors of this exclusive club?

Ah, swear if it is, I’d marry him this very night. Ah, should have when ah had the chance. Had ah known how things were gonna go down with the group. The door opened granting me access. As I walked into the lobby, I noticed the desk and the case of Club 33 merchandise. The Cast Member explained the rules that photos were allowed, but not in the bathroom. And there were to be no recordings. Interesting! Ah, ’d think they’d confiscate your phone if they could you taking pics in here. I was then escorted into the Court of Angels, which had a long, curved, elegant, blue, staircase.   
As I walked up those stairs, I was getting more and more excited by the minute. Ah, ’m coming m’ah Prince. I’d remembered thinking as I lifted my long, beautiful, gown and ascended the stairs in my clear sandals. Ah pushed open the doors that lead to the dining room. Ah passed through a wine cellar that featured paintings that changed scenes. Until I was standing in the Jazz Lounge. Sitting in the corner was a man in shadows, wearing a fedora. He stood upon my arrival and walked toward me. I exhaled, heart pounding, as he stepped into the light I saw his face.

“I see you got the dress! You look exquisite.”

He said smoothly. Taking a second to step back and admire me. 

“Thank you!”

Although he was quite handsome with his dark, piercing, eyes and goatee, and he was dressed to kill, ah really can’t explain it but I got an off feeling from him. It was almost as if he wasn’t real. But that’s crazy, right? I thought. He was clearly standing there in front of me.

“Shall we dine?”

He offered extending his hand in reference to the dining area in the next room. He pulled out my chair for me, and a server appeared that introduced himself as “Mark”. He sat our menu’s in front of us. I thanked him and studied the menu. For the 1st course, I ordered a snow crab claw. He choose the Fried Zucchini. Then he studied me for a moment intensely.  
“  
I’m honored that you could join me tonight LuCinda. I’ve been watching you for some time. If you don’t mind me saying. I’m one of your biggest fans. I even caught your performance the other night .. Fantasy.”  
“  
Thank you and yet ah don’t even know your name.”

“My apologies. You must forgive me for all this cloak and dagger. You may call me Rick. I’ve heard about everything that’s been going on with your group with your lead singer out of commission and the other .. conflicts.”

How did he know about that? You’d think we were all the best of friends if you saw us at events. We all knew how to smile and put on a good front for the cameras. I didn’t say anything, took a sip of my wine, let him continue.

“I just thought an escape would be welcome, and I thought this would be the perfect spot. Have you enjoyed your night at the Castle?”

“It’s beautiful!”

Ah answered honestly. 

“I’d heard about there being a secret suite, but ah never imagined ah’d see it. Much less stay there. Thank you. Ah, don’t know how you arranged it but.”

He smiled slyly and said charmingly.

“Ah my dear, I can do a great many things. It’s amazing what things can be accessible to you if you pay enough. This is just the tip of the iceberg so to say.”

“Ah feel like ah should repay you for going out of your way to bring me here.”

He waved it off.

“No repayment necessary. It’s repayment enough just being in your company luv. You may keep the suite as long as you like and the card as long as you’re here. I ask for nothing in return. But I would like to tell you a little bit about myself.”

I nodded.

“Please.”

He straightened his jacket.  
“  
Well, I guess I’ll start off by saying I am in the music industry as well.”

“You sing?”

“I have a great many talents."

He smiled and steepled his hands together.

"In my youth, I performed, but it seems like AGES ago."

I studied him. AGES ago? He looked no older than 30. Unless he was a part of a boy band way back when. I tried to think of the ones ah’d heard of. But I don’t think any of em had any members named Rick. He certainly wasn't Ricky Bell (of New Edition) or Slick Rick. Although it was very possible he could have gone by another name back then.

“In years past I’ve devoted my talents to more of a managerial role. I work for a small studio back home called Lightning Bolt Records. It’s not as well known as some of the bigger labels like Starlight, but I find that to my advantage as I get to work more closely with the artist on a one on one day to day basis. I think I currently am working with 5 artists that range from rock, to alternative, to RNB. You will be hearing one of my artists very soon on the radio.”  
“  
Tell me some more about your label?”

“Gladly. When I was growing up I came from a small family. Mom and I didn’t have much but we were grateful for what we had. I always told myself that one day I would make it for her. I made myself that promise that no matter what I had to do I was going to take us out of the bad situation we were in. My old man left us with *nothing* but had the nerve to move on and start another life with another family. Meanwhile, *I* had to step up and be the man of the family and take on all the expenses. And I watched as my mother bravely fought cancer.”

“Wow! Ah, ’m so sorry.”

“Thank you. Can you imagine being a teenager and have to pay 2,000-dollar hospital bills for treatments and overnight stays? That’s why I got into music. I had a decent enough voice so with the part-time job I had I put together a demo and shopped it around. It was rough at first. I signed up for whatever gig I could find that would pay me to sing until I was signed. My mom passed recently, and I started Lightning Bolt Records in her honor. She loved all kinds of music and there was nothing she enjoyed more than a lightning storm. If you come into the studio at night sometimes you’ll see it light up at certain times.”

He said fondly. I smiled.

“Anyway as I said we’re small but we make good music. But unfortunately, now it’s my son I’m worried about.”

“What’s wrong with him?”  
“  
I just found out he was diagnosed with an illness. It’s not looking too good!”

“Ah’m so sorry.”

First his mother and now his son. He sighed.

“My boy means everything in this whole world to me. He needs a major operation and if I can’t come up with the money...”

Silence fell over the table. Mark brought out the 1st course.

“Ah wish there was something ah could do.”

“My apologies LuCinda. I didn’t mean to bring this up *here*. This is my problem.”

“No. It’s ok. What’s your son’s name?”

“My boy's name is Freddy. He’s just turned 6. I would have brought him here but he’s with his mother this weekend so. I’m gonna plan to bring him back out here when I get the chance. He’d love this place, and I should be thinking about spending as much time with him as I can.”

“Don’t think like that. You have to have faith. Things can turn around.”

“I don’t know. Maybe your right. Some of the artists on my label want to get together and put together individual albums and one together and donate the funds to his operation.”

“See there you go!”

His face brightened.

“Maybe you can come down to the studio sometimes. No pressure of course, but we’d love to have you just to listen or maybe throw in your professional expertise. My other artists are fans of yours as well.”

“Ah’d love to help. Any way ah can.”

Rick and I locked eyes with each other. He’d reached across the table and kissed my hand.

“Thank you.”

He said softly staring into my eyes. Can you imagine my confusion when he turned up at the wedding? I remember it all too clear, as it had *just* happened not that long ago. The Pastor had just asked.

“Then if you please turn to face one another and join hands as you each take your marital vows.”

M’ah eyes had misted over a little, as I shot a glance at Ro, (who looked so good in the white suit he wore) and ah wondered would this be us one day standing in front of all our family and friends about to be husband and wife. So I was kind of day-dreaming. That’s why I had to blink when all of a sudden Pizzazz, Jetta, Roxy, a dark-haired man, three goons and …. RICK? I stared at him in confusion. Why was he with *them*?

“HOW THE HELL?”

Yelled a nicely, built, man standing at the main door.

“ACE!”

Jerrica called out in dismay.

“You couldn’t.”

ACE? Who the hell was ACE? She must be talking to the other dark-haired guy who looked amazingly similar. But she was looking right at Rick, the man that I’d had dinner with that night. For the briefest of seconds, his eye fell on mine. Mine begging for some kind of explanation. 

“DADDY!”

Pizzazz shrieked at the top of her lungs. Harvey looked like the feeling was mutual. His eyes widened and his mouth gaped open.

“PHYLIS? WHAT IN THE SAM HILLS GOING ON AROUND HERE? WHEN DID U GET OUT?”

“What am *(* doing here? How could you do this Daddy? You haven't been to see ME in weeks, and of all the places I find you here with *, THEM*! And walking this .. this red-haired tramp down the aisle?”

“Mick and Tor

Chance declared.

“Along with Master Fredrick Raymond.”

“How did you know?”

“Like Father like son.”

He grimaced obviously not pleased at the observation. Did Chance just say, Raymond? So, Rick and Fredric? They were related to Eric Raymond. Were they *both* his sons? Ric had told me Freddy was *his* son which would have made him Eric’s *grand* son. Not his son. Unless Chance was just mistaken or had just the word *son* to emphasize that he was related to Eric.

“You are very clever Mr. Kret. But obviously not clever enough today.”

Ric said smugly. 

“The day’s not over yet.”

Chance replied. Then everyone started shouting.

“QUIET!”

Rick yelled at the top of his lungs. 

“I’m sorry to disturb your little ceremony, but I have an announcement to make.”

Why are you doing this? I thought to myself. How do you even know them? Then a thought crossed my mind. Did his son REALLY need some kind of help? He certainly didn’t look it. But you never knew about people. Was this what this was all about. Maybe that’s the announcement he’s about to make. Ah’ve heard about how desperate situations can cause people to do desperate things. So I waited. 

“You can’t just come in here like this?”

Rio yelled and started toward him. I found myself standing to my feet without realizing it. Ah still needed to believe that there was a good reason for all this. But I saw Chance grab Rio’s arm and say something in his ear. 

“What do you want?”

He snarled through gritted teeth.

“Oh, nothing much. Like I said a little announcement.”

“Which is?”

Aja demanded. He grinned slyly.

“I know who Jem is.”

Oh, mah GOD! He was gonna bribe them all. So that was his plan? But how did he know who Jem was? After we’d meet in Orlando, I’d been so moved by this story that I did go visit Lightning Bolt Studios. It was small, but all the artists were so warm and friendly that it felt like hanging out with m’ah own family. It had impressed me that they’d also done so much for charity and wear constantly doing community projects. Rick had given me a card and told me to give joining *their* label some thought as a solo artist. He and ah had kept in contact, but he’d never once mentioned a rivalry with Jem or Starlight Music.  
“

The audience fell silent and you could feel the tension in the room. Shana spoke up annoyed.

“And you crashed a wedding for *that? Boy bye!"

“Don’t you think it's curious that the lead singer of Jem and the Holograms is not in the wedding party?” 

Pizzazz asked.

“Surely she would be at least a senior bridesmaids considering her relationship with Kimber?”

“Yeah, where is that fairy floss bitch.”

Jetta chimed in. Well that they’d mentioned it they did make a good point.  
“  
Jem if it’s any of your business is waiting to make her grand appearance. She isn’t in the wedding party because she is going to sing.”

Jerrica retaliated. Raya jumped in (in) defense.

“We wanted to keep it a surprise.”

“LIES! Jem isn’t here. She isn’t anywhere. And do you know why that is? Because Jem is already here! Jem is really Jerrica Benton!”

Ace snarled and the once so handsome and charming man I’d dined with appearance begin to transform right before my eyes. The room gasped in shock. And if she was what business was it of any of theres? I thought angrily.   
“  
That’s ridiculous! Jem and I have been seen together a number of times.”

Jerrica retorted.

“You’ve been seen together because of the Holograms.”

“Us?”

Raya asked confused.

“NO! NO! Not your GROUP. “Real” Holograms. The ones *you* use to project light over yourself to disguise yourself. Don’t play dumb with me Jerrica. You know *exactly* what I’m talking about.”

“Are you nuts?”

Bunyip declared.

“Certifiably I’d say.”

Chris remarked. Honestly ah didn’t know what or who to believe at this point. It wasn’t *so* absurd to believe that the Jem persona *could* be a hologram. Ah’ve seen holograms used on stage at concerts. Pac did it. So it wasn’t unreasonable. But ah still didn’t see what point Rick was trying to make by calling attention to this. So Jerrica might possibly use a hologram to disguise herself as Je,. WAs that really newsworthy? Maybe she just got really bad stage fright. Ah, know what that's like.

“What do you know about Holograms?”

Aja demanded.

“Enough to show the world who you really are. I am now an expert in holograms. In fact, I have developed how to make holograms not only appear but disappear as well. That’s how I was able to sneak in. Holograms can make me invisible. I can do it with this.”

He held up his lapel pin triumphantly.

“I can also *read* holograms. I can see when something is not really there. You may well have Jem to sing for the wedding, but I can tell if somebody is really there or not.”

Ah thought that would be the end of that when Jem really did show up and when challenged launched into her beautiful, classic, balled “Love Is Here.” He fiddled with his device in aggravation.

“What is this?”

He said to himself.

“What do we do now boss?”

Torch asked now that there plan of trying to take over the world (uh wedding) had gone up in flames. (Let's face it lab rats were smarter than this crew).

“Shut up and let me think? The proof is *here*”

Then in mid=air, a transparent, 3D image of a computer was projected.

“This was created from a photograph the private detective Malone took at the Starlight Drive-In. I know all about your computer.”

“So we have a computer, big deal.”

Aja scoffed.

“Oh, but this is not an ordinary computer is it Jerrica?”

He turned to her with his shit-eating-cat ate the canary grin.  
“  
So I’m Jem because we have a computer that does more than word processing and balance the books. We *are* a multi-million-dollar music company and we have a computer that specializes in special effects for stage shows. Impressive I agree but hardly miraculous or newsworthy.”

“Why keep it at the mansion and not the company?”

“Because it’s the safest place for it? It’s expensive.”  
Aja stated sarcastically. Did they not catch that? How did he know where the computer was *now*? He said why keep it at *the mansion*? Had he been to the mansion? OH GOD! Had he broke into the mansion and found it? Again, I tried to catch Rick's eye. You didn’t have to do this. Ah, would have recorded more songs for the label. All you had to do was ask me. But just think as if ah didn’t think I could be more shocked with the turn of events, Roxy suddenly snatched Rick’s lap pin and tried to snap it in half. She then tossed the pin at Sean and yelled “DESTROY IT!” He caught the pin, dropped it to the ground, and drove his sword into it. Sparks flew everywhere and the thugs vanished. But as I stood there dumbfounded Rick had disappeared and there standing in his place was. OMG! I felt sick to m’ah stomach and ah had to sit down suddenly.

It couldn’t be. But there he was standing inches away from me. He saw me staring and he gave me a smirk. OH M’AH GOD! I felt dazed. Ah thought about the way Rick (and not all the puzzles pieces had come together). I thought back on how he had walked me back to the castle and held m’ah hand. Ah thought about how after visiting Lightning Bolt records he’d leaned down and given me a kiss on the check. M’ah flesh crawled, Eric Raymond’s lips had touched m’ah skin. And ah felt dirty like I suddenly needed to take a shower and scrub the places his lips had touched. 

“ERIC RAYMOND. BUT YOUR DEAD!”

Jerrica shouted and I shivered as goosebumps appeared all over my arms.

“What?”

Eric gasped as he realized his cover had been blown. He turned to Roxy.

“You did this?”

ERRRRICCC”

Pizzazz bellowed. 

“You let me MARRY YOU! YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE ACE!”

Ah hadn’t been the only one deceived obviously. In all that chaos I slipped out the back of the church. Then it had gotten WORSE! Cara pulled me and Reece outside later that night. 

“Ah’ve been calling you. Ah was starting to get worried.”

Ah looked at Cara who just looked tired, and all of a sudden ah got a chill down my spine. Something had happened. Immediately I put my arms around her. Reece said.

“This better be good. I was 5 minutes away from having that bartender get up out of here with me tonight and go back to the room. It’s been a while. I need some bad!"

She murmured.

“So, are we performing tonight or what?”

“I might as well tell the both of you. I can’t be a part of Eye Candy anymore. I’ll do this last album with yal, and you know I’m always gonna be there for the two of you if you need help with lyrics or steps or anything but I just can’t.”

“What are you TALKING about? You can’t be apart of Eye Candy no more? Stop trippin. If this is because of *me*. I know I been acting a little crazy lately.”

“Not *everything* is because of *you* Shereece. Something happened to me tonight and I just need a minute. Ok. Can I get that?”

“What happened?”

I asked her softly. She looked like she tried to find the words and faltered.

“Blaze and I..”

She started and it was the first-time ah’d ever seen Caryn look so small. She was one of the toughest women I knew.  
“  
Here we go!”

Reece mumbled.   
“  
We had an argument. I’ve known for some months he had another baby on the way with someone else. I learned after I found out I was pregnant.”  
“  
"Your pregnant?”

Reece looked at her crazy. Caryn shook her head and her eyes misted up.

“I had a miscarriage not long into it. That’s why I was late to some of our practices and appearances. I found out and I just wanted to make sure. I was gonna keep it, but two months in I lost it.”

“Oh GOD! Ah, ’m so sorry.”

My own eyes teared up. Reece dropped her attitude and sighed.

“GOD Caryn. Why didn’t you just tell us?”

“I was. I wanted to. Right after the New Zealand concert, but I guess that’s what made me lose it. Anyway, after that a girl contacted me on social media and told me *she* was also pregnant with his baby. I thought she was trying to start shit with me, but she didn’t know. She told me he’d proposed to her and she’d accepted. She came across my number and texts he’d sent me. We had a long talk. She reminded me of me years ago, young, naïve. I just hope I made her see sense! I didn’t tell him I was here, but the weddings been all over social media so he probably figured it out. I’m not sure how he got my room number. Anyway, he was there the night I got there. I tried to get him to leave but he was drunk, high. He..”

She paused. I put my arm on hers. Reece snapped.

“He WHAT?”

Caryn chocked up.

“I tried to call the front to send security. I tried to fight him off.”

I could feel her trembling as I put my arms around her.

“He raped me.”

She muttered and sniffed. OH GOD! I didn’t think I could get anymore stunned today. I just held Caryn and ah keep hearing myself say “Ah’m so sorry! Ah, ’m so sorry!” Over and over again. Reece cursed loudly.

“FUUUUCK!”

Then she marched off. I stood up.

“Reece!”

Ah yelled after her. Ah didn’t think I could take any more drama tonight. Caryn stood up and held m’ah arm and shook her head meaning I needed to let her cool off first.

“But she’ll go after him. She’ll *kill* him.”

“He’s.. he’s probably long gone by now. Ah talked to Chance. He’s probably got a search warrant out on him.”

I sat down next to Cara and for a minute there was just silence.

“I am so sorry.”

She said quietly.  
“  
You don’t need to apologize. Eye Candy will be ok. You can have all the time you need. If we need to go on hiatus we’ll just go on hiatus. That’s not the important thing. The important thing is that *you* heal. And Reece and I will be with you every step. Whatever you need us to do. What do you need us to do?”

“I just feel like… I should have *never* let it get to this point. Everyone told me. My mom told me. Reece told me *over and over and over*. Pops told me. I saw *all* the signs. All the lies. All the females. All the abuse he's caused. This wasn’t even our first physical altercation. It never went as far as it did tonight but if I’d just walked away Cinda. Why didn’t I just walk away from his ass? I don’t even think I loved him after a while. I just had gotten used to him being there. It was over a LONG time ago.”

“It’s over now.”

I promised and then said angrily.

“He won’t come anywhere *near* you. We’ll get 24 hr security if we have to. We’ll testify and have his ass locked up.”

Blaze wouldn’t do this again.  
“  
I guess ah just feel bad for *her*. She sounded young. I don’t want her to have to go through this. I don’t know if what I told her did any good. She seemed to be listening to me, but she didn’t say much. I know how *(* was in the beginning. I heard you and didn’t hear you. There were times I *tried* to leave him alone, but then he’d use the same ol lame line on me or he’d buy me something and I’d go right back. Talk about cliché hunh?”

“What matters is that you *did* walk away. No matter how long it took you (you) got out. Ah, ’m *proud* of you. IT must have been hard having to stand up to him and fight him off.”

“Yeah, but that’s just it. Who's to say he won’t come back? Yal can’t be with me *all* the time. He knows where we live.”

“We can get another place,”

“But didn’t you say you wanted to move in with Ro. You said you found a place. You said something about you and Delta?”

I made a face like psh.

“Girl. Your m’ah family. We’ll just have to find a place *all* of us can stay. Delta won’t care and Ro won’t either if you stay with us. Ro cares about you too. And then you have both your Dad’s. They’d let you stay with them in a heartbeat or your sister Shana. You have *so* many people who care about you that will move you in with them *tonight*. When we get back home, well look around for a new place.”

Then there’d been Reece’s announcement not long after another wedding Delta wanted me to attend. Reece decided to call off the group. 

“What’s gonna happen to Eye Candy?”

I demanded. I was tired of beating around the bush. Tired of not knowing. If we were over she needed to tell me.

“You really want to do this now?”

I just gave her a look like yeah ah really wanna do this now.

“Fine! I was gonna wait until we were back home and sit down with the both of you but whatever. I think we had a good run as Eye Candy. We’ve recorded 5 albums, we’ve toured all over the country, we’ve gotten awards. We did Sharayah’s movie. We had our own fragrance line, dolls, clothes. We spoke at schools and inspired tons of people. We did more than I even imagined we could. But at the end of the day, I think it’s time for us to move to the next chapter. Girl groups ain’t it no more. That trend died out a LONG time ago. Music ain’t about that no more. It’s all about ratchet now and silicon.”

“So, you just want to break up the group?”

“It’s *time* Cinda. You heard my sister. If *that* wasn’t a sign we need to stop. I don’t know what is. And then I’ ma be real with you. *I’m* not...”

She sighed.

“When I came to you all those years ago, I had my reasons for wanting to start this group. It didn’t have anything to do with what I told you about us getting closer or my love of music or me wanting to tour all over the world and experience seeing the same places as my mother. I said a lot of stuff but it was never about that.”

“You think ah don’t know *why* you did it? You wanted comeuppance for Presjina.”

“I won’t deny it. That bitch thinks.”

“STOP!”  
I cut her off coldly. Ah was tired of Reece’s childish vendetta with mah cousin. Get over it already, I thought. You're almost 30 years old. 

“Well anyway. Cinda I know I’m not right. I never said I was. Love it or hate it, I don’t really give a shit but I don’t want you and Cara to hate me. I’ve put both of you through HELL these last months and I apologize. But I just think I need to work on *me*. I can’t lead the group and *IM* lost my damn self. I know I make this look easy but *(‘m* tired of me. I wanna do better.”

It was the most honest, sincere thing ah heard her say about herself in well ever.

“But we don’t have to break up to do that. “  
“  
We can all get therapy. Ah, ’m sure Jerrica can recommend someone here. We can all go together. We can work on it.”

I thought therapy sounded like a really good idea. I know we’d all been going through it. This could make us stronger as family. This could make us heal. I knew it would. I looked at Reece hopefully.

“And I’m not saying that’s a bad idea, but right now my heart really just isn’t in this no more.”

Then she tried to tell me how we’d all still be Eye Candy regardless and work on other projects, but all I heard was EYE CANDY is OVER! Then shortly after there was the news that my mother had taken ill and I had to not even having unpacked my bags had to get on another flight and head home. Ah remembered seeing m’ah mom lying in that hospital bed.

“Well, the prodigal daughter is back I see.’

She adjusted herself in the back and sat her reading glasses and book aside.

“How are you, mama?”

I toyed with the bracelet Dean had given me.

“I’m ready to get out of here I can tell you that much. These people are working my last nerves.”

“When did the Doctor say you could leave? Do you need anything”

“Not soon enough. I *need* for them to bring me the release forms so I can sign them and go home.”

I pulled up a chair beside her. I might as well go head and address the humungous elephant in the room.

“I talked to Aunt Pearl.”

She gave a dramatic sign and leaned back her pillows.

“You know you could have told us.”

“Your Auntie gets all worked up over *nothing*. I am fine!”

“If you were *fine* you wouldn’t be *here*. What did the test say?”

“So then you haven’t talked to your father.”

“Just tell me.”

I said tiredly. I was sick of being left out in the dark.

“I’ve been diagnosed with sickle cell.”

“Thank you *soo* much for sharing that.”

I mumbled sarcastically and immediately pulled out my cell phone and started to read about treatment options so I could be prepared. I’d heard of SCD. Eye Candy had done a television special (concert) to donate the funds to sickle cell patients last February. Somehow I knew the cost of mama’s treatments would fall on me. Daddy brought in a decent enough check as an owner of a publishing company and I know he’d do what could but from what I was seeing costs associated with treatments could cost up to 1 million for patients who read 45 with annual costs for 30.000. I slumped back in my chair. That was A LOT of tours and album sales. 

“Did you tell the others?”

“The Doctors were the ones who spoke to your Father. I have not yet informed your brothers and sisters. I did not want to worry them more than they are already worried that I’m here in the first place. But I do plan to have us all sit down together *if* they ever let me out of here.”

“It’s okay mama. I’ll stay with you until the Doctor comes in. He should be in (in) about a little while. I’m sure that if everything checks out and they don’t need to run any more test they’ll let you go home. I can pack your bags just in case and then we can leave. Have you eaten yet?”

“If you can call it that. They brought something that vaguely resembled eggs. Though what kind of chicken that got it from I’m not sure. I ate a little of the bacon and had some of the tea. LuCinda I should tell you before the Doctor comes that he has already spoken to me and informed me that the life expectancy for females isn’t high and I am *way* past that.”

“Mama you’ll be *fine*. They have to say stuff like that. Look at Tionne. I meet her last year at the concert we did and she’s one of the strongest people I know. They told her the *exact* same thing and not only has she been recording for years she’s also a parent. She has flares and her bad days but she’s still *here*. Do I need to call her and have her talk to you?”

“I’m sure she’s a lovely person and I appreciate the sentiment but I just want to prepare you for the worst if it comes to that.”

I felt hot tears spring to my eyes.

“Why are you telling me this mama. Your *not* going anywhere. Daddy and I will find out what treatments you need and we’ll take care of it. I’ll do extra hours at the Starling. I’ll schedule more appearances with Eye Candy. (Then I remembered just that quick there was no EC anymore. Still, I could go to Jerrica and sign a solo contract or I could start m'ah own girl group with Delta) Your not gonna *die*!”

I stood up angrily. Tho why I wasn’t quite sure what or who I was mad at. All I know was here was another thing that I loved more than anything being ripped away from me and I couldn’t do a damn thing but sit there and watch it happen. I wouldn’t let this disease take my mama. I’d fight it if I had to. I’d find a cure myself. Mama and I haven’t always seen eye to eye, but I wasn’t ready for her to leave yet.   
-  
“Girl I don’t know what you getting all worked up over. You need to lower your tone up in here. Come here!"

She demanded. I stubbornly stood there. She couldn't talk to me like that. This wasn't high school where she just called all the shots and I was just a child in her eyes. She sighed and switched her tone.

"Lucinda please."

I sat back next to her in the chair.

“You are *definitely* my daughter. I’m not trying to upset you. I’m trying to be *real* with you. I know we’ve had our issues in the past but that is definitely not my intention here. I just wanted you to know that (and I’m not saying it will come to this) but if it does I have made peace with it. “

“Well, that’s so good to know you're ok with leaving us.”

She reached for my hand.

“I do not want to argue. I just want to spend what time I have here (however long that may be) with my *family*. I think that this news has given me some time to think and revaluate and I just want to there in any way I can for all or you!” 

I think that was the moment I decided that with Eye Candy coming to an end there was no reason for me to be in LA anymore. It just didn’t feel right. Although I had Delta, and Ro, and the Starling I knew in my heart that where I really needed to be was with my family. Had I not been running around all over the world with Cara and Reece dancing and singing and living it up, then maybe I would have been around to catch the signs that Mama was getting sick. I could have done something. I could have gotten her help quicker and she never would have been diagnosed with sickle cell in the first place. Somehow this was all my fault. 

It was two days later since ah’d arrived back to Georgia, and waking up in my own bed. The night before ah’d slept at the hospital all night in an uncomfortable chair waiting for news on what went wrong at his video shoot.at our old school McKenzie High. Ah opened m’ah eyes to the mouth-watering smell of French toast and m’ ah Daddy sliding a table in front of me and a tray full of cheese, scrambled, eggs, French toast, and orange juice. Next to the picture of juice was a pretty flower.

“What’s all this?”

“Well.”

He said sitting on the bed beside me.  
“  
"It's been a rough couple of days for us, hasn't it?

Couldn’t argue with that.

“So, I just figured you could use a little spoiling this morning.”

“Aww! Thank you, Daddy! Ah really could. Did you give mama the same treatment?”

He sighed.

“Tried, but you know your mama. She was up before me trying to dust and vacuum. That woman won’t be still to say her *life*” She told me she could get her own breakfast thank you very much.ISo, I just said hey.”

He shrugged and threw up his hands. I shook my head and dug into the food. Daddy put his whole FOOT in this! It felt like ah hadn’t eaten in AGES.

“And you know I was thinking why don’t after you eat you can get dressed, pack some things, and we can go check out this fashion show thing your Uncle is having?”

I raised my eyebrows.

“*You* wanna go to a fashion show?”

“I mean. It might be fun. I know you like that sort of thing and I hadn’t seen my little brother in a while so.”

I sighed.

“You’re trying to get me to make up with Reece.”

“She’s your *cousin*. You know when my brothers and I were growing up I’d have to straighten those knuckleheads out a time or two. We’d *stay* getting into it, but at the end of the day, we *always* had each other’s backs. You and Reece need to work this thing out. Eye Candy might or might not be over but your *always* gonna be family.”

I rolled m’ah eyes. He patted my leg.

“So, finish eating, get showered, pack some things for the weekend. We need to be on the road in a few hours. It’s not that long a drive, but I’d like to be there before it gets *too* late.”

Ah knew Daddy’s vision wasn’t what it used to be. So, a couple of hours later, here ah was at Uncle Ken’s house. We’d all had dinner. It was me, Daddy, and my two sisters Jesselyn (who went every time the car moved) and Steph (who hardly liked to go anywhere at all so ah’m very surprised that she decided to come). Mom said she had too much to do around the house. Shereece was still knocked out. No surprise there. That girl could SLEEP FOR HOURS and probably wouldn’t surface until night. Then she’d probably (if a club was open) want us to go club. Dad and Unc had gone off to watch sports on his new HD4K television. Step had gone into Unci’s study to get on his internet and Jesslyn was half watching reality tv and half texting. Tasha and I were sitting at the table eating chocolate, chip, ice-cream.  
“  
You’re a really good dancer! Did you take lessons?”

I asked her. She smiled brightly. 

“Thank you. I took lessons when I was about 3. I took ballet and tap and jazz. I took them until I was 10."

“Why did you stop?”

I asked her. She shifted but answered.

“My Daddy got laid off. It took him a while to find something else. He had a good job at a plant, but then his new job didn’t make as much so I had to stop.”

“Ah’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. I dance on the dance team back home at school. Do you really think I did good at the Pep Rally? I almost missed a couple of steps.”

“It didn’t show.”

I promised her.

“And do you know what else?”

She looked like what’s that.

“Ah can see why Reece picked you to play her in our series. Ah really do think you're going to nail Reece at the audition.”

“I’ve been watching some old videos today. I *really* want to get to play her. I just hope I do good enough.”

“You got it!”

I assured her.

“Do you have any tips for me?”

I thought about that for a minute.

“Attitude and confidence are the key things when playing my cousin. Deliver the lines and steps and songs like you’ve already got the role all sewn up and you will. Reece will be rooting for you every step. She wouldn’t have called you out if she didn’t see it. And ah’ll be right there to cheer you on. But ah know you’ll get it. Ah, don’t even know who else will try out but ah just have a feeling.”

“Thanks, Cinda. Do you remember when you first performed with Eye Candy?”

I smiled fondly.

“It doesn’t even seem like it was *that* long ago.”

“Can you tell me about it?”

I thought back to that night. I was at Delta’s place getting ready. The family she stayed with were all out for the evening and she was helping me put the final touches on my hair and makeup. She stopped and looked at me in exaggeration.  
“  
Girl if you don’t be still I’m never gonna get your eyes right. You’re gonna have one lined and one smudged. I don’t think you want that.”

“Ah can’t help it. Ah, can’t believe I let Reece talk me into this. This is CRAZY!”

Delta shook her head/

“We’ve sung on stage at the Attic a couple of times. We got through it. Your just putting *way* more pressure on this than is necessary. Just go out there and have fun like we do at the Attic.”

“But that’s in front of our *friends*. We *know* them.”

“Girl they are *just* people. What’s the worse that can happen?”

“What if I hit an off-key? What if I forget the lyrics? What if I mess up and miss a step?”

“Ok, first of all, I’ve heard you go over the songs *so* many times. *We’ve* sang the songs. You made *me* memorize the words. Then GIRRLL... You know you can SANG. I don’t even know what you're tripping over. And if you miss a step just pretend like you meant to do it. Like they’ll know the difference! Like I said get out there and have fun with it, that’s all. Then it’ll all be over.”

“That’s easy for you to say. Reece thinks we might actually get signed. It’s supposed to be all these big, celebs, there tonight and record labels. Ah, don’t know. What if one of them offers us a contract?”

“I guess then I’d just have to get used to having an internationally, famous, recording artist as a bestie. That is if you don’t forget *the little people* when you make it.”

“You know ah’d never do that. You’d never let me anyway.”

“That’s right!”

Delta said making a face.

“Cause you know I will snatch that big head of yours down to earth so quick if you start ego-tripping. But seriously girl if you *do* get offered a contract tonight, I think you should take it.”

Delta knew all about what I went through at home and how angry it made me that my parents just didn’t want to let me grow up. Which is the exact reason why ah was having to get ready at her place. 

“Ok. There. I’m done.”

She looked over my hair and makeup and nodded. I stood in front of her.

“You look HOT!”

“Ah feel naked.”

I said looking down at the black shorts with the lime green graffiti that rode further up my thighs than I usually wore and the halter top that exposed my middle and the silver, navel, ring I’d just recently gotten. Delta laughed.

“*You* designed the outfit.”

Ah had designed the outfits and ah was happy with how they all came out (given the time I had to do them). Shereece wanted them really sexy and she was the one who wanted the shorts that revealing.   
Ah felt like they were more underwear than shorts. Ah, guess ah should be happy I wasn’t wearing Reece’s stage outfit which was a black with lime green graffiti one-shouldered dress that had part of her side out and was short in the front and shaped like a V. What if this somehow got back to mama and she saw the pictures? She’d KILL ME for dressing like what she’d call “a lady of the night.” Delta seemed to read my mind.

“She’s *not* gonna find out. She thinks your with me and you are. We have our phones on us. I’ll hold yours and if she calls while your on stage I’ll just step out and tell her you told me to hold your phone and minute and I’ll have you call her back.”

“What if she asks where I am?”

Delta thought this over. 

“I’ll tell her that you're in the *other room* and the music was loud and you were singing and I heard the phone first. It’s simple and it’s not exactly a lie. You will be in another room, and there will be loud music, and you will be singing. See it works.”

“Ah’m scared!"

I admitted biting my lip.

“I know. But you’ll be ok. You can do this! Come on. We better go pick your cousin up before it gets any later.”

Ah, know ah got there late. Delta and I had to convince Presjina to come with us. She was not in the greatest mood that her group had fallen apart and she just did not want to celebrate her birthday. Ah rushed backstage while Delta and Presjina went to find seats. I saw m’ah cousin looking extremely aggravated turning up a bottle of wine.

“Hey! Ah, ’m sorry. Don’t be pissed. Ah know ah’m late but ah had to get her to agree to come and then there was so much traffic! It’s PACKED out there@ Did you see all these people! OMG! Are you freaking out right now as bad as ah am? Isn't this place wild? The top actually revolves. Where’s Cara?”

Ah was rambling. Ah, tend to do that when ah have a bad case of nerves.

“We don’t have a DJ?”

She snapped.

“What? I thought.”

“He’s not coming!!”

That was the *first* introduction I got to Bobby “Blaze”.

“What the HELL are we supposed to do for music? That’s *it* I’m calling this off cause I’ll be DAMN if I’m gonna go out there and look crazy in front of all these people! THANKS, A LOT, CARYN!”

Reece yelled to the top of her lungs.

“You know I should have known. She didn’t want this no way.”

“Wait a second. Calm down. We can still make this work.”

“How Cinda? What are we gonna sing and dance to the imaginary music in our damn heads.”

Ah was kinda use to my cousin’s hot temper. I just took out my phone and dialed explaining as I did.

“My uh my boyfriend.”

Although it felt really weird to *still* be calling him that when he wasn’t just that anymore. But Reece didn’t know what we’d done.

“He used to work at a club. He can do the music. I’ll call him now. He might already be here. Ah told him we were performing here tonight.”

“And I did.”

I told Tasha.

“And he came through and we went out there and we KILLED IT! We did three songs Cara wrote “I’m Good” “Dip It Low” and “Hot Boyz” and the crowd LOVED US! We got a standing ovation! After we went backstage Jerrica knocked on the door and she invited us to fly into LA and well the rest is history.” 

Later that night, ah couldn’t sleep, so I slipped out of the guest room, down the hall, downstairs, out the back door that lead out to the pool. I sat over the side and dangled my legs out into the water and just stared out at the night. I was sure everyone was asleep. We all had a busy day tomorrow. My cousin sat down next to me.

“Hey!”

“You finally woke up.”

“Yeah. You know me. That pep rally took a lot outta me. I’m not as young as I pretend to be. Fa real girl I'm sore in places I ain't know could get sore. Damn, I need a massage!"

“We left you some food. It’s in the fridge.”

“Thanks! So, you still mad at me?”

“I wasn’t ready for us to be over. But I guess what happened needed to happen. I need to be with them right now.”

"Yeah. I heard about that. How is Auntie?"

"You know mama. She's always gonna be mama."

“Not even home a minute and that accent is coming back.”

I might be talking to Reece, but ah just wasn’t *there* where we could joke around. She sighed.

“I’m just glad you’re here even though I know you still mad. THANK YOU! That means more to me than you know. And hey can we look at it like this? Rather than saying I *broke up* Eye Candy can we just say Eye Candy is on hiatus? Just give us a year to get things back tight. Caryn needs time to deal with what happened. She’s strong Cin, but she’s gone through a LOT more abuse than with just him. She needs time. Hell, she needs therapy. I know she’s been having nightmares and there will be times you can just see in her eyes at random times that she’s flashing back to what happened.”

“She does?”

“Yeah at Kimber’s talk show before she went on. She almost dropped the cup she was holding. It happened so fast. I just happened to be standing next to her and I grabbed her arm and the cup before she dropped it and spilled water all over the floor. She’s messed up Cin. She needs *help*.”

"Is she here?"

"Yeah she told me not to tell Daddy yet, but when I got up I saw she'd texted me an hour ago saying she was just pulling into the Sheridan."

She hesitated.

“You asked me at the airport was *I* the one who did it and I told you I wasn’t sorry but I didn’t *directly* answer your question."

I clapped my hands to my mouth.

“Why do you think that is? You know I’ve *always* been 100.”

“So your saying..”

Shereece nodded.  
“OMG!”  
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My mind was trying so hard to process this. 

“Yeah. But that’s my sister and if that means that I have to be the one then I’m not gonna let her go down for something that honestly *should* have happened a *long* time ago.”

“Ah won’t say anything.”

Reece kind of smiled.

“I know you won’t. You’ve always had my back. Well, I’m about to go in the house and get some of this food. You coming?”

“In a minute.”

Another memory popped into my mind. A yard full of chairs. My Principle at the podium announcing.

“I know present to you the Class of 2007.”

Purple caps were tossed up and rained down from the sky. Delta, our other friend, and I jumped up and down and hugged each other. Tears ran out of my eyes. We’d MADE IT! We’d finally graduated! My Dad came over and presented me with a big bouquet of balloons, While my brothers attacked me and gave me big, strong, bear hugs. ATL was snapping selfies of us. Classmates were coming over to me and Delta asking us what party we were gonna hit up later. Reece had pulled me to the side.

“Congrats cuz!”

I just beamed. 

“So where the party at tonight?”

“Ah think we’re all gonna head over to Dave and Busters.”

“Cool, because I have something I really want to talk to you about.”

At Dave and Buster's, (were most of my classmates had ended up) Sheerece pulled me to a less noisy, area of the adult game room.

“Look at you growing up on me.”

She’d said standing back and observing me.

“I guess you grown now hunh?”

“Some like that.”

Ah said feeling myself a little too much since I now had my diploma.

“Aiight. So, then I guess you ready to be a grown, ass, woman then?”

Actually, I was just about to do just that. But Shereece couldn’t have known about my plans later so I just laughed at her.

“Alright what’s up? What did you want to talk to me about that you trying to keep on the low?”

“Why I gotta be trying to keep something on the low?”

“Cause ah know you. What you do this time?”

“Nothing. Cin I know you not happy here. What do you plan to do now that you graduated?”

“I got accepted into the Savannah and Clark. I wanted to go to Savannah but I might end up going to Clark."

“Mmm.”

“What’s wrong with Clark?”

I asked suspiciously. I knew it was an all-female college but ah was ok with that. Ah already had a man. Ah wasn’t looking for another one. Ah was GOOD!

“*Nothings* wrong with Clark. You can go to Clark or..”

“Or what...?”  
“  
Or you can travel around the world and make lots of money. Your choice? It’ll take you what? 4 years to finish school and then another couple to settle into a career. Or you can make that kind of money in a YEAR. You can move out of your folk's place. You can get your OWN damn place. You won’t have to answer to NOONE. Cause that’s what grown, ass, women do.”

“You want me to be a flight attendant?”

Shereece snorted.

“No... I want you to be in my girl group.”

“Girl group? You mean like TLC, SWV, Destiny’s Child, the Pussy Cat Dolls?”

“Yeah. But we’ll be ten times better than all them chicks with the help of my new sister.”

“Uncle Kenneth got another woman PREGNANT?!”

I gasped mouth hanging open.

“OH GOD NO! Let me hear he done knocked up some other chick other than my mom’s. Oh, it’ll be ON! It’ll be me and *him*. No, I guess I didn’t tell you that my Dad adopted a friend of mine. She was going through it and her moms wasn’t shit so you know how Daddy is.”

“And you were ok with that?”

Somehow, I doubted this seriously.

“Well, I mean I *was* pissed at first but I got over it. Caryn’s cool as hell. She’s SUPER talented. She can dance her ass off! She can write like no body’s business! And she can sing (although she doesn’t like to do it in front of people). Not really sure why that is but she can be a lil weird sometimes.”

“Weird how?”

“Well, she doesn’t like to do nothing. She'd rather stay home and read *books* than go to clubs and parties. She actually likes to hang out at our house with Daddy. I mean Daddy’s cool but. “”

“That doesn’t sound so weird.”

“Good. GOOD! You like to read too. Yal have something in common. She needs to meet some new people. Although she *did* just cross Zeta.”

I thought this over.  
“  
So you want us to be a group?”

“Yeah. See there’s this club opening *here* called the Galaxy in a couple of weeks. It’s supposed to be HUGE! I was just thinking we can get something together, pick out some cute outfits, and then do our thang. BAM! Wait for all the labels to bite that will probably be there. Then we just take all they lil ends. We straight gone be PAID baby! You got to be feeling me on that?"

“But two weeks tho? We don’t have any songs. We don’t have any music.”  
“  
"See that’s where you're wrong. Caryn *does* music. She writes it. She produces it. She has this notebook she carries with her that has tons of lyrics and poems in it. All we have to do is pick a few and put em to music. Then you forget my Daddy also knows about music. Don’t you see Cin? This will *work*.

I thought it over. It *did* sound good, but could we pull it off tho. Me an RNB superstar? Then I thought HELL YEAH. A smile started to form on my face. Shereece gave me a knowing look like now you get it.

“Will you meet my sister? I can bring her here. *Here* this is what she looks like.”

She took out her cell phone and showed me a picture of a very serious but absolutely gorgeous dark-skinned-girl with short, hair. 

“But don’t mention I took that. She HATES pictures!”

“Ok. But you have to do me a favor.”

“Yeah what’s up?”

“September is about to pick me up. I need to get out of here.”

“Oh.”

She looked smug.

“Starting the *celebrating* early I see.”

“Yeah and I need *you* to leave out with me and make it seem like your taking me out to celebrate and we’ll probably be out all night or we might not be back at all for a lil bit.”

Shereece grinned.  
“  
I got you. As a matter of fact, there is someone here I wouldn’t mind hooking up with again.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More confessions come to light as James reveals to Keneth what he witnessed the night of the wedding and Kenneth shares a hidden truth about his marriage to his wife Bianca. Cinda and Kenneth over a late-night talk answer the question who's proposal she plans to accept and Kenneth finds out a scary realization about Tasha's past.

Kenneth  
More Truths Revealed  
Can you imagine my surprise to open the door and find my big brother and nieces on the other side? I was grinning from ear to ear. I’d talked to James about a week ago, and he hadn’t mentioned anything about coming down. He’d been telling me about Lynn being diagnosed with sickle cell. I’d of course offered to administer the treatments if she’d consent to come here to have them. I’d even put in a call to my sister in law to ask her personally. I had a few patients with sickle cell. Lynn had thanked me and told me she’d give it some thought. I knew how stubborn and prideful my sis could be so I didn’t press. I just left the offer there should she choose to accept (or reject it). I got everyone settled, and showed them where the guest rooms were.The house was relatively new. I’d been here a few years, so it didn’t really feel *that* new. But it was the first time *they’d* been here.

“Do you think you have enough space little brother?”

My big brother smirked. Okay so yeah. My eyes were a little bigger than my stomach as the saying goes. I know this place has too many damn rooms in it for just a single person. I don’t even know what I was thinking about. Probably foolish pride that I *could* afford it. I never really considered myself *that* kinda guy (that was excessive). But I guess here I am showing my kinfolk around my 24-room mansion. The thing is I don’t even entertain all that much.

I have a couple of the guys at the hospital I’m cool with and will invite over to catch a game on the big screen. Then I have a couple of my college friends I stayed in touch with (line brothers) that will check up on me every now and then, and we’ll attend a fraternity function. I’m PROUD to be an A PHI A man, and I like to try to stay active in the Birmingham chapter! But that’s about it. On my hand, I can count about 5 good friends I hang out with. Then of course there’s my lady who stays the night on occasion. 

I put my brother in the guest room on the 1st level (my daughter Caryn’s room when she visits), I put my niece (Step) in the study on the second floor because there was a pull-out sofa there (and I know she’d want to be close to the computer so she could read and write). Cinda, I put in another guest room (on the 2nd floor) not far from Reece’s. My other niece Jess, I put on the 3rd floor (with me) in a space I’d converted into a large, walk, in closet (which also had a comfortable sofa). Luckily, I’d just made a run to Olive Garden so I had food for everyone. After we’d all watched the pep-rally on the big screen TV my grand-daughter and nieces all wandered off when we switched to a sports station. For a little while, we lost ourselves in ESPN and didn’t talk. During a commercial, he asked.

“So how have you been holding up man?”

He knew how rough in the past this time of the year could be for me. There used to be a time when none of my family could even find me. I’d disconnect my phone and slip out to a private, lake, home I owned.

“I’m ok.”

I told him sincerely (and I was).

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I just don’t know what I’m gonna say at the fashion show tomorrow. I know everyone will expect me to say a few words about B.”

“It’ll come.”

He assured me. Then he laughed a little.  
“  
You always used to worry about speeches. Even when we were in school and you did okay. Do you remember that time you told me you tried to bs your way through that poem in LIT."

I laughed a little 

“Yeah, and I used those old lyrics to that song by the OJAYS.”

I recited in a dramatic way.

“All you fellows who have someone and you really care. Then it’s all you fellows that better beware. Somebody’s out to get your lady. A few of your buddies they sure look shady. Blades are long, clenched tight in their fist. Aimed straight at your back, and I don’t think they’ll miss. WHAT THEY DOING? They smile in your face. All the time they wanna take your place. The backstabbers.”

I couldn’t believe my teacher had bought that but it was an older, European lady, who’d never even heard of the O-Jays. She’d eaten my bs, plagiarized, poem up, and given me an A. 

“It’s supposed to be a surprise but at the end of the fashion show, Shereece is gonna make an announcement that she’s going to turn the old house (that they lived in) into a museum and call it “The House of B*.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I still had a lot of B’s stuff in storage.”

I’d actually thought I’d get rid of it. I knew I *should* get rid of it. It had been YEARS since the accident. I’d moved on. But the times I’d gone to my storage place and brought some of it back to shift through (and ask Shereece if or Cara if they wanted to keep any of it) a memory always seemed to surface and I’d just sit the stuff to the side. A lot of it was *at* the old house anyway. Shereece and I had actually gone down to the old place this week with an architectural company to talk about plans to make the place over. With plans for the museum to be opened a year from now, I thought it was the best way I knew to get closure and at the same time save (and honor) a piece of B’s memory. 

“Good! Good!”

We watched some more of the game and then he sighed and said.

“You know I feel like I owe you an apology.  


“If this is about the money to cover Lynn's treatments. I told you I got you. You don't have to worry about that."

“No, it’s not about the money. I told you I was gonna pay you back and I will. I should have some money coming in this month. There are just *things* that I never told you.”

He sighs and takes a sip of his beer.

“It was your wedding day.”

*James thinks back. It’s the day of his little brother’s wedding and he’s walked away from the rest of the groomsmen down the steps of Sardis Baptist Church to locate a drink machine before the ceremony started. He was thinking of how he couldn’t wait until all this was over so he could get out of this hot tux (and get Lynn out of her dress). Maybe during the reception, he’d stay an hour and then slip out. Maybe his job would *all of a sudden* need him to come in tonight to work the night shift. It wasn’t that he wasn’t happy for his brother. She *had* to be something special if she was willing to put up Ken’s over-sized head. He'd snorted, They’d probably get in fights over the mirror. He was about to walk away when he heard voices coming from one of the classrooms on the left. Soft voices, female, raised, It almost sounded like an argument (tho he couldn’t tell as it was in French). James thinks maybe some of her side got a little lost. They weren’t from here. They could have gotten turned around. Not thinking anything of it, he walks toward the class-room to stick his head in the door and offer to show the ladies back upstairs. But he quickly stops. In the dark he sees two females entertained kissing passionately. Hands roaming all over the other one's backs and backsides. They’re really going at it, and he’s about to walk away, but then he notices that one of them is in a wedding gown. The woman about to marry his brother pauses as if she’s caught someone intruding on her private moment. She and James catch eyes. James quickly slips up the stairs cursing to himself. He walks outside and right into their other brother Patrick whose standing there talking to his daughter Perri (whose 2).

“But Daddy you told me we were gonna go to Reb Lobster.”

She whined. 

“I know I promised you Reb Lobster but we’re gonna go to Red Lobster just not today.”

“But Daddy I want shrimp.”

“But we have to stay here and help your Uncle Ken. Remember you promised him you’d be his flower girl. You don’t want to hurt Uncle Ken’s feelings, do you? Then they’ll probably have shrimp at the reception. Can you just wait for a little bit?”

Perri looked doubtfully at Patrick. James accidentally swings the door open and hits Patrick.

“Hey! What’s up? You look like you just saw a ghost. Is everything ok? Is Ken okay? I still can’t believe that fool is getting married. Didn’t he tell us he was too much man to be tied down to one woman.”

James pulls Patrick to the side.

“I don’t know if there’s gonna be a wedding,”

“What happened?”

“I just saw *her* making out with one of her bridesmaids’ downstairs.”

“Whaat? Oh shit! Were they naked.”

He turns to open the door, but James stops him.

“This is serious man. What are we gonna do? Should we tell him about this? We can’t just let him...”

“I mean she’s from *Paris* man. *PARIS*, I heard about how they get down there. They don't have the kind of *restrictions* we do. Then how do we know he doesn’t already know about it? Ken ain’t exactly a good boy. He done told me about some things he’s done with some of the brothers that..”

Patrick shook his head.

“You don’t know him like I do.”

This just doesn't feel right James says uncomfortably. He and Pat were his REAL brothers. *THEY* were supposed to have his back. If Lynn were messing around on me on our WEDDING DAY I’d want someone to tell me, James had thought.

“They might even *all* have something going on. It’s not our businessman. Ken’s a big boy now. He can take care of himself. I say we leave it the hell alone.”

“So, I stood there and I watched you marry her. And I knew it wasn’t right. When the preacher asked if there were any objections. It just wasn’t right. I should have spoke up."

“Hey.”

I moved over on the couch and sat next to him. I could tell he'd have one too many and it was starting to mess with his emotions.

“It’s ok. *I’M OK*. If it’s any consolation you could have told me, and it wouldn’t have made not one bit of difference. I probably would have told you something like “PSH, well she ain’t gone be with her *now* unless it’s with me. She bout to be MY wife so that means she mine!”

“You right!”

“Besides man, there were things *(* didn’t tell yal. The lady you saw? Was she tall, thin, and blond?”

“Yeah.”

I nodded.

“Her name is Kaitlyn. She and B had been run the same circuits since they were 12 years old. They’d shared runways, events, covers. Literally. They were together several years before they meet me off and on. Nothing serious so she said. They just liked the occasional hookup after a party or a club at fashion week. B as you probably figured out was bi. I kinda knew what she was, but I just didn’t care about it. You know how I felt about that woman.”

He nodded thoughtfully.

“Well at our wedding, I didn’t know all this. B told me much later about their history. She invited her to be one of her bridesmaids but she always had this stank attitude when she was around me. She’d turn her nose up at me and roll her eyes. Truthfully I couldn't stand her ass either. I thought she was a stuck up bitch. What you probably walked in on was them arguing. Kait chose *that* day to confess her true feelings for my wife. Ironically, that was the day she realized that it was *her* she loved and wanted a life with. But she’d already made a commitment to me. She told me she’d thought about leaving the church, going back home, and never contacting me again.”

“Why didn’t she?”

“Image man. It was already out there that she Bianca Knowles (international model) was tying the knot. She didn’t want to taint that and have negative stories and articles about her in the press.”

“Damn man. I didn’t know. She came up to me at the reception and pulled me to the side. She told me not to tell you what I saw. She told me she was just an old friend that she was cutting ties with after the wedding and she’d never hurt you. That she loved you more than anything in her life.”

“Maybe. I don’t know. It wasn’t *all* bad in the beginning. We were happy for about a year. Then she started to get restless. Thinking back, I think it was one day we were watching a big, fashion, show and she saw Kait doing the show. I guess that brought it all back because after that she wouldn't shut up about going back home. So stupid me, thinking I was being a good husband let her spend our first Christmas back home without me. I had put in for a lot of over-time because I really wanted to make her first Christmas special. I was gonna get her a diamond tennis bracelet and Lexus with a ribbon tied around it. I think that was probably the first time they hooked up again. I guess what she gave her was better."

“So, you know?”

“I had my suspicions. I saw pictures on her phone she’d sent. I fought it, man. I really tried to make her just be with me. We’d fall out. I’d yell at her. She’d yell back. I threatened to cut her loose and kick her out. She’d cry and plead and tell me it meant nothing. And if you think it was *just* Kaitlyn.”  
> I shook my head.

“It was photographers. It was male models. It was any male or female in the industry that could get her what she wanted. My wife was *very* active.”

“I don’t know how you did it, man. That couldn't have been me. You were a good one. She had you WHIPPED!" 

"Yeah. I think it was probably about 8 years of going through it with her. I went with her back home and she actually told me she wanted me to meet this lady. At first, I didn’t want to. I was thinking oh HELL NAH. You must be out yo rabbit mind if you think I’ ma break bread with someone you done laid up with other than me. But I let her talk me into it. So she and I meet at a nice, restaurant. She introduced herself to me and she told me all about how she and B had met. She told me how she had a husband herself and a 3-year-old son, and how she didn’t want to cause me and B any trouble.”

My brother snorted.

“I know right! Then she starts telling me that she loved my wife just as much as I did. She pleaded with me to understand and how she and B had something special. And that they’d even discussed letting me *share* this special thing with them.”

“WHAAT? So did..”

“Yeah, I did. More than once. B and I had an agreement. We agreed that as long as *(* was a part of it. Even if I wasn’t actually joining in then I’d let them continue to *see* one another. I just figured she was in Paris and we were in Birmingham. I’d make sure *(* came home with her when she visited. “

“But weren’t you worried that there would be other times when she’d tip out and you *wouldn’t* be a part of it.”

“I guess at the time I was thinking if I gave her permission to have an outside relationship of our marriage she’d grow bored with it because it would take all the thrill out of sneaking around. So yeah she and Kait were together about 5 years while we were still married.”

“Wow!”

“Yeah, man. That’s how it was. But interestingly enough she was *not* cool with any other woman’s attention on me. I wish I would have suggested that shit of *me* having an outside affair with another woman other than her. Oh *that* wasn’t happening.”

My brother took another sip of his beer and let all this sink in. Then he said quietly.

“I haven’t told LuCinda about me and Lynn.”

James and Lynn had separated a year and a half ago. He sighed.

“I should have said something to her when she first came home some nights ago.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“She’s been through so much Ken with the group, and then Lynn, and her friend in the hospital. There just hasn’t been a good moment.”

“I think she’s gonna figure it out when she notices you aren’t there when she wakes up in the morning.”

“Well, the first night I waited until she went to sleep and then I went to my own place. Then I just got up real early and came back in through the garage. Then the next night she stayed at the hospital. The next night I just slept in the basement.”

I sighed.

“It doesn’t feel good being kept stuff from man. TRUST ME!”

“I just don’t want to put too much on her and have her end up in the hospital like Shereece.”

Heaviness settled on both of us after that statement and we watched the rest of the game that was on, and another one in silence. That is until I noticed only *one* of us still watching television and the other had stretched out and dozed off. So I put my nice throw over him and let him rest. Maybe I’d get some rest too. It had been a long day. Later, I’d wake up and do some work. I went up to my own room and laid out across the bed. Sleep immediately took me. When I woke up, it was after midnight. The house was quiet. I decided to do a walk-through to make sure everything was ok. I sat up and reached for my phone to make sure I hadn’t missed any messages from Kim or work (needing me on call). Then I got up. Tasha was in the game room. It looked like she was fallen asleep with the reality goggles on. Either that or she was just really into what was being projected. Shereece’s bed was empty. One of my nieces was laid out on the couch in the study, and the other was in one of the guest rooms sleep with the television on HOMECOMING a film by Beyoncé playing on Netflix. My brother was still where I’d left him on the couch. Only he’d turned the tv to LAW AND ORDER. That left two. I found Lucinda sitting out by the pool. I slid down next to her.

“Need some company?”

She looked up at me and smiled.

“Sure.”

“You looked like you were a million miles away.”

“Ah guess ah just have a lot on m’ah mind.”

“I can understand that. Is it anything your ol Uncle can help with?”

She exhaled. But didn’t say anything. She just stared out at the water.

“Would this just happen to have anything to do with a proposal I heard about?”

“Which one?”

She mumbled. Which one? I raised my eyebrows.

“Care to explain that?”

“Uncle Ken, I’m married.”

“You and Ro? Yal *really* did it hunh? Did yal elope?”

She shook her head.

“Ah’ve been married since ah was seventeen.”

Well, this was new!

“To the guy, you dated in high school?”

She nodded.

“Ah haven’t exactly publicized it and m’ah husband and ah have been separated for a long time, but when I graduated and ah told all of you ah was about to hit up another party with Reece, ah wasn’t exactly honest. Ah went to have a commitment ceremony performed.”

I must have looked lost.

“A commitment ceremony is when two people enjoy the benefits of a traditional wedding without the certificate.”

I kind of let that sink in. I hadn’t heard of anyone tell me they’d ever done that. Actually it sounded like a cop-out.

“Ah know. Ah was young. Ah had graduated. Ah was tired of them controlling m’ ah life Uncle Ken. Ah, couldn't go out past 10. I had to be in by 9:00. Ah couldn't wear skirts that showed to much of my thighs or legs cause then ah was fast. Ah love my parent’s but you have *no* idea what it was like to be at home. Ah couldn't even go on dates without them having one of m' ah older brothers follow me to make sure ah wasn't where ah wasn't supposed to be."

“I think I know a little something about it. I tried to tell them to let up on you a little, but they thought I let Shereece get away with murder so pretty much they told me to mind my own damn business. Well, your mother did. Your Dad I think he *wanted* to give you a little more space, but your mother's word always won out on how she wanted you raised. I’m not judging what you did.”

I told her sincerely.

“Then you see why ah can’t marry Ro.”

“You feel like you’re in some way still committed to your old friend.”

“Ah don’t want to hurt Ro. Ah, love him, Uncle Ken! Ah, love him with every part of m’ah heart. And it hurts so bad. But m’ ah husband doesn’t have a lot of families Ah’m the only family he has. He lost his brother when we were in high school to the streets. His father and stepfather were addicts and his bio Dad died. He’s just getting to a better place with his mother. When he feel off that stage, ah never felt more scared in m’ah life. It was like that earthquake all over again.”

“He fell off the stage? What at a concert he was performing at?”

That didn’t sound good!

“We were shooting a video at m’ah high school for a single he was about to drop?”

“What did the doctor say?”

“They said it was dehydration and exhaustion.”

“Cinda, can I ask you a personal question?”

She nodded.

“Does your friend uh your *husband* have any *other* serious medical conditions?”

James had spoken to me a little in the past about this VERY TROUBLED young man. I try not to judge cause Lord knows I wasn’t always on the straight and narrow, but my concern was for my niece now who was claiming this young man as her husband. I did NOT want to get a call at 2 in the morning that some shit had went down and I’d have to jump in my car and ride out to the A. Just like I *should* have done for my daughter. My niece got kinda quiet.

“He’s had some issues.”

“Mmm. Hmm.”

“He’s had problems with his immune system.”

“Mmm. Hmm. “

“Ah didn’t know he lost his vision while ah was away.”

“Mmm.”

I shook my head.

“Does he have a drug addiction?”

She nodded.

“He smokes. But he’s done that since we’re were in school. Ah just know ah need to be back there for him and for m’, ah mom so ah can make sure they’ll be okay. Ah was thinking of even talking some nursing courses or either counseling. Whatever ah can do to help. Ah just can’t let anything happen to them.”

“I think you're doing a good thing and that your heart is in the right place. I’m very proud of you. It sounds like your husband needs a *lot* of help if I'm being honest with you. Is he ok now?"

"They recommended some pills. Ah had to go pick them up. Hes still there. He's resting. When I left some old friends had reached out and said they'd check on him. He and I even talked about having an actual ceremony. Something small. Ah, don’t want to hide anything anymore. Ah, ’m tired of secrets. Maybe we'll find ah'll find a nice place for us and we can finally be happy."

“Just let me know when to mark it on my calendar and you know that if you need *anything* at all. Money. Resources. I GOT YOU! All you have to do is call me and I’m right here.”

“Thank you, Uncle Ken.”

It wasn't purely because of my duty to be a good Uncle. I needed to meet this guy because truthfully he sounded like a train-wreck. Or as Shereece would say "a hot ass mess".

“We family girl. You already know.”

She stared back out into space.

“Ah just don’t know how ah’m gonna tell Ro,”

“Yeah, that’*is* a tough one! But I think I find that the quicker you do it the better, Like ripping off a band-aide.”

“Have you ever had to let go of someone you cared about?”

I nodded.

“There was a lady that I was dating that proposed to me, Layah."

“What happened?”

“I liked her. She was attractive, creative, passionate, we had good conversations. But it just didn’t *feel* right at the time. I think it was about a year after my wife died. She even favored her a little. Maybe that was it. But one night she made a candlelight dinner, told me she loved me and asked me to marry her. She had a ring and everything.”

"And you said?”

“I told her I’d think about it. I wasn’t crazy. There was also a large knife on the table and I wasn't trying to see my parts on the table sliced up as appetizers. Ya, feel me? But later I told her I just wasn’t ready and that I *did* still want to see her. Maybe it *would* have lead to that eventually. But I think she really wanted to get married. I heard 6 months later she’d meet someone on social media and was engaged.”

“Wow! She didn’t waste any time did she?”

“None. But Nah. You just... know when it’s right.”

“Like when you married aunty B hunh?”

Well, that was a loaded question, but I just kept it simple.

“Yeah. Like when I married Aunty B.”

I simply answered as it wasn’t a *compote* lie. If you would have asked 21-year-old Kenneth he would have *definitely* 100 percent told you that he had no doubts that *this* was the woman! And looking back, I guess I really wouldn't have traded all the bad times for (or had them with) anyone else. Shed taught me a lot. She'd taught me how to accept a person for who they truly were.

“Are *you* okay Uncle Kenny?”

Cinda asked looking at me in concern.

“Ah’m sorry. Ah, should have asked. “

“I’m ok.”

She looked at me like, are you sure.

“Uncle Ken, you don’t have to lie.”

“Seriously. I’m ok right now. I don’t know maybe it just hasn’t hit me yet. Tomorrow might be another story tho. So if you see me tomorrow morning and my eyes are a little bit on the red side and I tell yal something like I’m allergic to the new fabric softener you’ll know what’s up.”

“Ah am so sorry.”

“Why?”

“Ah could have helped more with the show. Ah, could have recreated some of the clothes. Ah saved every cover of every magazine she was on and all the spreads she did. Ah loved her style!”

“And she loved yours!”

Cinda looked at me in surprise eyes big.

“They never told you?”

Cinda looked at me puzzled.

“Remember when you were in high school and I think McKenzie was raising money for something or the other? And you invited us to that fashion show where you’d done all the clothes?”

“Ah remember? We were raising money for the new library wing.”

“Your auntie was so impressed with the clothes. She got very excited! You were just at that point 15 years old. She went right up to your mother and told her that she felt your talent was being wasted here, and that she knew of all kinds of contacts back home who could mentor you. And she can pull some strings to get you into one of the *best* design schools in Paris. Everything would be paid for. She would even personally go back to make sure that you were taken care of. She wanted you both to go. You for fashion design and Shereece to study with top models all over the world. That was always her dream. But as you know your mom wasn’t having NONE of that!! She and your mother got into a terrible fight over it. She ranted and raved for weeks!”

“Ah didn’t know.”

She said slowly. 

“Aunty B never told me.”

“She never told you because I think she was offended when your mother made it clear she didn’t want us interfering. So she said very little to you after that. I told her it was the *wrong* way to handle that, but I guess in her mind she didn’t want to get to close to you because she really thought she had this amazing opportunity for you and you’d rejected it. I think it kind of hurt her feelings.”

“But ah didn’t reject it. Ah, would have gone!”

“I know.”

“Ah can’t believe she’d do that!”

Cinda shot off angrily.

“Ah could have studied design in PARIS with the best designers in the world. She had no right to take that away from me!"

“But you got something even better.”

Cinda looked at me like what.

“Your homegirl. Delta. You never would have gotten to know her if you’d gone to live in Paris.”

“Well ah guess you’re right.”

“I know I am. And you did get to see the world, right? You guys did get to do a show in Paris. And hey now that the band’s on break, and yes I believe it's just that, who knows. Bee talked to her friends HIGHLY about you. All I’m saying is don’t be surprised if some of em come up to you tomorrow and ask to see some of your designs. They might already have seen some of em on your social media pages. Thee’s no telling what kind of offers they’re gonna come at you with. I’m just saying.”

“Yeah, but see that’s the thing ah can’t exactly go, now can I?”

She sighed.

“It would have been different then.”

“It doesn’t have to be. Maybe you can *all* go as a family.”

“Yeah. When ah got home the other night we all did say we should have a vacation.”

“Hey! See. All I’m saying is you never know.”

The door opened and Shereece walked out.

“Yal old women still out here running off at the mouth?”

“I should get in. I prob need to work on my speech if I don’t wanna get up there and sound crazy tomorrow.”

Reece rolled her eyes.

“Or you could do that later. Don’t yal feel like going out tonight?”

Cinda raised her eyebrows.

“Out? Ah didn’t know anywhere was open *here* this late!”

“Hey I know the Ham ain’t got it like the A but I think it’s some stuff still jumping. It’s Friday night.”

I said in defense of my city.  
“  
I guess this is an EC exclusive invite.”

“I guess you can come too, Kenneth.”

She drawled. 

“What about mah Dad and sisters?” 

“They’re sleep. Let them sleep.”

I told her. Besides James probably hadn't been to a club since ain't no telling how long.

“What about Tasha?”

Cinda asked. Reece shrugged.

“Is she up? She can come.”

“Your gonna let her go to a club?”

“I mean. Might as well let her experience it now so when she gets older she won’t think she doing something by sneaking out to one. She’s already over it like oh so that’s it.”

Made sense to me. Besides I’d be there so I could keep an eye on her that she didn’t drink or try to slip out with some guy and end up at a hotel or in his ride. 

“So, where we going? The POB (Platinum Of Birmingham).

“Oh GOD! Is that *STILL* OPEN! It’s been open since *you* were in high school.”

Reece rolled her eyes.

“Why I gotta be old tho?”

I wasn’t *that* old! I wasn’t even gray yet.

“It’s other clubs here other than the Platinum.”

“Is it?”

Shereece asked in amusement. I took out my phone from the pocket of my black robe.

“I say we go somewhere different. How bout Club Xclusive.”

I looked it up.

“Yeeeah but..”

“You’d rather we go to ol ghetto-ass POB?”

She looked at me in disbelief.

She pulled up a video of a young lady wildly twerking her behind.

“And that’s what you wanna look at all night.”  
“  
And you really think this other one will be any better?”

In tun pulled up my own phone and showed her a clip of one from Club Xclusive of some people grinding all up on each other. 

She sighed.

“I just don’t want people all in my face all night talking bout “You Reece from Eye Candy”, Girl let me holla at you. Let me get yo number. Then they gone be trying to get me and Cin to perform and I ain’t come out for all that. I just wanna go to a nice, place, where I can chill. I ain’t looking for all that noise tonight. POB ain’t even got no VIP area.”

“You just SO boogie! They ain’t even got no VIP area.”

I mock whined teasing my daughter.

“And you just *country* and need to get out this lame, ass, city so you can experience some *real* nightlife.”

She shot back. 

“Here’s something Reece. It has a kinda private semi-section. The Skky Nightclub.”

“I guess it’ll do. Why all these club videos here have to look so ratchet tho.”

She mumbled.

“I guess we better get ready. I’ll go wake Tasha up.”

“I got her.”

I said and headed for where I saw her last. Cinda and Reece headed to her room to change. Which was a good question. I probably should give some thought to my own clothes. I couldn’t very well show up in the joint in this robe and my shorts. I probably should also shoot Kim a text just to let her know. Kim wasn’t the insecure type, and she’d probably just say *have fun*. But I’d been just rather put everything out there. Hiding things and not telling things lead to secrets and then lies. Lord knows I’d had even of those in my past relationships. When I got to Tasha she was very close to rolling off the edge of the couch. I kneeled down and touched her gently. Just that small touch and she shook violently. I tried saying her name. She jumped like I’d burned her and jerked from where my hand was on her. Then she tried to fight me off her. 

“Tasha.”

She opened her eyes, but for a minute she just stared at me blankly like she wasn’t seeing *me*. 

“Hey! Hey! It’s me.”

I said gently and tried to steady her before she fell completely off the couch. It took her a minute to come back.

“Paw Paw?”

“It’s just me. It’s ok.”

“Did I miss it? What time is it?”  
“  
It’s after 1 AM. I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m sorry.”

I noticed that she had goosebumps on her arm.

“What’s wrong? Did you have a bad dream?”

“Yeah, I .. have them sometimes.”

“Did you wanna tell me?”

“I .. I. forgot.”

I eyed my grand-daughter but said nothing.

“Uh, Cinda, Shereece, and I are going to this club. Shereece and I decided to take you with us.”

“To a club.”

“If you want too. If you don’t you can stay here. *(* can stay here. I don’t have to go. Shereece likes to dance off nerves.”

I explained. Tasha nodded.  
“  
They won’t card me?”

There was a problem.

“It’ll be fine.”

If they didn’t buy she was over 18, I could always slip the bouncer a nice note.”  
“  
Seriously. It’s cool. You should go and get changed Unless you wanna wear that.”

I said of the Ramsey sweatsuit she had on. She wiped her eyes and her mouth and sleepily headed to Shereece’s room. As I watched her leave, a heavy feeling hit me that told me something wasn’t right. I’d seen that kind of jumpy behavior before, and the wild look in her eyes had scared me. DAMN IT! I slumped down on my couch. What man could have done this? I needed to get to the bottom of this somehow.


	15. Chapter 15

NEW CHARACTER TYREKE  
*Tyreke wasn’t a character in Beyond. (Although if you were smart you may have picked up on some things that hinted his existence). TYREKE KEN WILLIAMS is 13 years old currently and attends ARRINGTON MIDDLE SCHOOL in BIRMINGHAM ALABAMA. He’s light-complexioned, 7fett, and 8 inches, and has hazel eyes. He basically likes to wear athletic gear and his favorite team is the Chicago Bulls. But he naturally wears clothes well and looks good in anything. (A trait he picked up from both biological parents). While he inherited his biological father’s smarts, he also got his mother’s laxness when it comes to schoolwork. So his attention doesn’t stay in his books for any amount of time and before long he’s bored and moving to the next activity. Since he’s 13 he really doesn’t have a concrete plan as of yet what he wants to do with his life and is at a stage where he’s at crossroads with two paths. He has good influences. His mother is a nurse. Her name is Leah and she although she works long hours, she tries to keep him on the street and narrow (making sure his grades stay up, he stays respectful, and attends church). She does the best she can raising him without a male figure present in their household. He has friends on the team and a girlfriend that tries to guide him in the right direction. But his head is also starting to get turned to the influence of an older crowd that are showing him the “dark side” (drugs, alcohol, street violence, and money). And even though because of his height he can pass for much older, he’s still young and now that he’s gotten a taste of the “fast life” it may be too late to turn back. He’s had a few legit jobs (Footlockers (a shoe store), Pizza Hut, and a job at Top Golf) but they never seem to stick. Sometimes he helps Leah out at the hospital voluntarily. Ty can be very outspoken and blunt. He likes to be straightforward with people and expects the same in return. He has a playful streak, but like a lot of teenage boys, he can have his moments where he’s moody, sullen, and withdrawn. He can also have a very hot temper! For this reason, he has to be constantly corrected by his mother not to curse and geta smart mouth with his teachers. Tye has a rather odd taste that leans toward the bizarre and unusual. Such as he likes channels on YouTube that either are about strange paranormal happenings or conspiracy theories. He also is an anime geek and his favorite anime of all time is SOUL EATER and DEATH NOTE. He has his own popular channel where he does walkthroughs of video games (and does commentary) that has gotten quite popular. He also reviews video games on his channel. He likes much, but it’s mainly HARD ROCK and RAP that’s playing in his head-phones. He also fools around with music. But rather than singing or rapping its beats that are his specialty. And his mother just got him a beat-making machine for his 13th birthday (and a GO CART) which he loves! His birthday is MARCH 21st. This makes him an ARIES. His zodiac sign being the DRAGON (which very appropriately sums up his character). He was born at a health center in Birmingham Alabama called POSITIVE CHOICES. I picked the name TYREKE because there was a show a long time ago (that you may have heard of staring the twins' TIA AND TAMERA MOWRY) called SISTER SISTER. Tia’s boyfriend at the end of the series was named TYREKE and I liked the name (and thought he was cute). TY might have been the nickname of someone in LEAH (pronounced LEE-YAHS) life. Maybe her FATHER. KEN was a man from her past that she loved and respected a lot. LEAH is biracial. Her father was African-American and her mother was European American. She has no other brothers or sisters and no other kids. So Tyreke has no cousins or siblings. Tyreke is a BHAM only exclusive character, but from time to time he may pop up in the original BEYOND story when it resumes. (Possibly).


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyreke gets a shock when his mother Leah reveals the truth about his birth. Then he gets an even bigger one when he finds out the identity of his biological mother. The Allowan scene was written by my co-writer Elwyn. Allowan is completely her series (and doing).

Tyreke  
Unleash the Dragon

I remember it like it was yesterday. Well maybe because it practically was. 6 months ago, on my 13th birthday, my mama had walked into my room. I was laid back on my bed tossing a ball on and off the wall (something that irritated the piss out of moms), and watching old episodes of BREAKING BAD on Netflix. I was slightly bored, but it wasn’t shit to do around my way. All my homework was taken care of, my stuff was put up, and my room for once looked halfway decent. All my clothes were hung up and my tennis shoes and Tims were lined up and cleaned to perfection. All my awards and trophies were hanging straight, dusted, and tall on display on my shelf. I heard the knock and immediately sat up, let the ball drop to the ground, and with one hand turned the sound down on the BOSE earphones I'd gotten myself as an early birthday present.

“Hey!”

Mama said sounding tired. She’s been sounding that way A LOT lately! She’d been on call so much at the hospital lately working double shifts, that it was rare she was home at 5 in the afternoon.

“How was your shift?”

I asked. She walked in and closed the door behind her. She paused for a minute and then walked over to the only thing in the room she saw out of order, a jersey I’d taken off and tossed on my window seat. She folded the shirt and placed it carefully on the window’s ledge. Then she sat down in a chair in the corner of the room. Mama was like that sometimes. She always had to be doing *something*. NEVER STILL!

“I need a vacation.”

She sighed and leaned back.

“I have an hour and then I have to straight back. Right before I clocked out I found out someone had called off and I got scheduled night shift again. I’m tired.”

“You should quit. It’s bull shit and you know it how they’ve been not giving you days off.”

My eyes flashed dark. My moms was a sweet lady and taking advantage of her niceness wasn't cool. I didn't like that!

“Language.”

She said sternly. 

“Sorry.”

I mumbled. But I really wasn’t.

“You think I haven’t thought about it. Every day I wanna march into that office and hand in my resignation.”

“Then why we still talking bout it?"

“Because I don’t exactly have anyone helping me out you know. Your gonna be starting high school before I know it. Next year you’ll be telling me ma I need new sneakers, ma I need a new uniform, ma I need expenses for tournaments. You aren't exactly cheap."

She said teasingly but I know she was serious. Mom's and I did ok. We lived in a pretty decent neighborhood (well most of the time). It was a two-level house. Not that far from an elementary school and the middle school, I attended. 

“I told you I could *help*.”

I mumbled. I knew *ways* to come up. I was just tired of seeing Mom’s struggle so I’d decided to get a little side hustle of my own. I discreetly tried to slide the expensive chain I was wearing around my neck, before her sharp eyes caught it, and realized she wasn’t the one who’d bought it for me. 

“NO!”

She told me firmly.   
“  
I want you to concentrate on your *school work*! *I’ll* take care of the finances in this house! And don’t think I don’t know about that little crew of thugs you hang around with lately. I don’t want either of them over here when I’m not here. Do you understand me?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

I mumbled. She just didn’t like DJ and Q because they were older by a few years and went to high school. But then, everyone thought *(* was already in high school because of my height. Put it like this, I have *never* been carded when I go to the ABC beverage store with them. And then they’d turned me on to what it was like to have money of my own. And I'm not talking no minimum wage working at Mickey Dee's type bs. I'm talking REAL MONEY! I never had to worry about having the latest *anything*: IPHONES, CLOTHES, SHOES, DEVICES. They kept me up on all that. I’d be crazy to give all that up. Mom sighed.

“I really didn’t come in here to argue with you. It’s just been that kind of day. My new boss is *so* nitpicky. He has something to say about every freaking little thing. It’s almost your birthday and I know we really haven’t spent that much time together lately. I’m starting to feel like I don’t even know you anymore. If you keep growing we’re going to have to get you a new bed, and then the hair.”

I’d recently tried something new with my hair and gave it twists all over.

"What you not feeling it?"

"It just makes you look so much older."

“I’ve missed you too!”

I told her sincerely.

“And I don’t really need anything big for my birthday. You don’t need to try to throw some big, surprise, party behind my back PLEASE tell me you did NOT do that!"

I hated those.

"I hadn't honestly had the time to plan *anything*."

“We can keep it simple. How bout we just go to STIX or OLIVE GARDEN. Just us!”

She nodded.

“That sounds nice. Ty, there’s something I really need to talk to you about.”

And right there my radar went up. “There’s something I need to talk to you about” never lead to anything good coming from a woman. I tried to make light of it hoping to take some of the tension off from the awkward pause.

“You got me that new PS 5 that just dropped for my birthday hunh? Hey. I know you probably wanted it to be a surprise, but I promise when you give it to me I’ll act surprised.”

Mom shook her head and said heavily.

“I never told you how you came into this world.”

“I’m .. guessing you had sex with someone and 9 months later.”

Tho I’d never known who this man was. She’d never mentioned him, and I just didn’t feel it important to ask. Like I said before Mom and I had done okay. We didn’t need his ass.

“She was a wreck when she came in. She kept demanding to know if all this would be done in privacy and there would be no phone calls and no paperwork to trace back. She kept saying that no one could ever know. She was VERY armament about that. She was a fiery one alright."

“She?”

I said slowly looking mom’s dead in the eyes.

“I always knew you were special. I knew it from the first moment you opened your eyes. You'd defeated all the odds. It’s rare but in some cases, the fetus is able to live outside of the womb born at 22 weeks. “

This wasn’t making any sense. What was she trying to tell me, that she’d tried to have me aborted but the attempt hadn’t worked? I slide a little back from her.

“You were so still at first. The Doctor’s thought. I thought. They handed me you wrapped in a sheet with your umbilical cord attached. I was supposed to make sure that you received a proper burial, but when I went to take you, I could still feel a sight breath. So, I took you. I took you home and I raised you as my own.”

“You .. you tried to have me killed?”

My tone dropped low.

“No. No. I *saved* you. When you first opened your eyes, I knew you were my miracle. I always wanted a baby but I found out at an early age I wasn’t able to conceive so when I saw you. OH GOD, Reke I should have told you sooner! I am *so* sorry.”

I got up abruptly and paced a little.

“So, my parents? My *real* parents?”

“There was only a young woman that came in that day.”

“Do you remember her name?”

“As I said she didn’t want anything signed.”

“Do you remember what she looked like?”

“Tall. She was your complexion and had your eyes. Dark hair. She looked around 18 or 17.”

“I see.”

I said thoughtfully. Without realizing it, I'd gotten up and started pacing the length of the room and tossing my ball from one hand to the other. I do that when I'm agitated.

“Are you angry?”

She asked hesitantly. 

“I know this maybe wasn’t the best way to drop this on you days before your birthday.”

I paused with my back to her. I *could* be mad at mom for keeping the truth from me for all these years, but she’d also saved my life. She certainly didn’t have to take a young, black, baby, under her roof, raise, feed, and clothe him for 12 years. This certainly explained a lot though. I always thought I was mixed and my ol man was African American, and that I was just bi-racial. Even though I didn’t have any bi-racial features. No, it wasn’t Leah I was mad at. So I turned around to her and said seriously.

“These changes nothing. Thank you for telling me the truth.”

She narrowed her eyes in suspicion at how calmly I was taking this. I guess she thought I’d have a fit and go off and start yelling. I did admittedly have a bit of a temper. It wouldn't be the first time.

“What can I do?”

She offered looking full of guilt. I was about to tell her nothing because there was nothing she could do, but then I had a thought. 

“There *is* something I’d like for my birthday after all.”

I said sitting back down on my bed and meeting her eyes finally.

“Tell me.”

“I’d like you to take me to see the Doctor that had me delivered.”

And although she told me that he’d been since retired, a few days later she’d set up the meeting. The man now looked like he was damn near in his 80’s. I honestly didn’t think I’d get much.

“Well let me think, I’ve performed a lot of *operations* over the years.”

Yeah, I just bet you did I thought. He’d mused while sitting back sipping on what he *said* was coffee, but I had my doubts about that. I knew the smell of alcohol when I smelled it, and this man reeked off it.

“We were hoping that you might keep patient files?”

My mother suggested.

“This woman. She was my complexion and had the same color eyes.”

He studied me thoughtfully and considered.

“I can't say that does much. Lots of women have been patients of mine with light-colored-eyes. Perhaps I may have something in my study. I have kept over the years medical records of all my *patients* in the basement. It may take a little digging. I’m afraid I haven’t gone down there and looked through those things in quite a while.”

Well wasn't that just shady as hell that he would *still* have these records laying around in his basement. I wondered what else he had in his basement. Their bodies? I looked wearily at moms. I’m sure that was some medical lawsuit waiting to happen. But I guess that this man could get me what I was looking for was what was important. My biological mother’s name. So we followed him down to the basement, (me with my hand inside my jacket all the while, cause you just never knew in the HAM what madness would go down). And this guy was already weirding me out. Something about him just wasn't right. I lead the way, making sure mom stayed behind me.

“Ah, here we are.”

He said leading us over to a set of file cabinets.

“2008 you said it was? Let’s see what we have here?”

Surprisingly all though everything looked ancient. Had this guy not heard of the internet and that we were now in the digital age? Everything looked perfectly organized. Another sign that he was probably a homicidal psychopath. He removed a folder and thumbed through the contents. 

“Yes. It seems I did get a visit that year from a young woman named “Chloe" that seems to fit your description. 

He paused with the information in his hand.

“You know I took an oath not to let any of this go, but I suppose that for an *old friend* I could be persuaded.”

*Old friend*? I don’t like how he was looking at my mom's when he said that. I briefly glanced at her sharply. She just dug into her purse and took out her checkbook. She quickly scribbled something out and passed the check to him. He then in returned handed me the medical records.

“Enjoy your reading!”

I snatched the file from his hands. As the months passed, I must have stared at that file a million times! I practically knew it by heart. I saw the damn thing obsessively in my dreams. The words and the letters and the punctuation marks just dancing around in my head. Her name was Chloe. Her eye color was hazel. Her birthdate was July 1st. Her height was 6 ft 8 inches. Weight was around 135. The more I thought about this woman and what she’d tried to do to me, the darker my thoughts had become.

I was hanging out with Erron, Trey, Q, and DJ (at DJ’s crib) after I got out of school. It was Friday and we were all LIITE AS FUCK sitting around playing video games drinking and smoking. Well, Erron and Trey were playing (if you could even call it that). I always envied the way they could finish a game within a couple of days of getting the game. And this was before anyone else I knew at my school had the damn thing. This went for consoles as well. I hadn't yet told them about what moms had told me, but that day I felt like getting some shit off my chest. So I found myself telling DJ the whole, ugly, story about how I'd found my way into this world.

“That’s fucked up man!”

DJ said taking a hit. 

“But at least your Mom’s was there.”

His *rarely* seemed to be. He and his younger brother (Darren) practically raised themselves. I could count on my fingers the times I’d seen their mom’s home. He’d told me a while back that she was an addict in and out of rehab. So the responsibility was left on him to be the man of the house.

“You ought to be grateful for that shit.”

“Yeah, but I can’t get this shit out of my head. She tried to *kill* me, man."

I mumbled. Then I raged quietly. Eyes low, droopy, and fire-red (half from anger half from the blunt)

"I been there! A couple of em have tried to kill me."

He confessed lazily.

“I’m gonna find out who she is.”

That bitch would pay for what she tried to do to me if it was the *last* thing I did.

“You know now that I think about it yo ass always has reminded me of somebody."

DJ blew out a cloud through his nostrils and closed his eyes.

“What?”

“You remind me of somebody. That shit’s been fucking with me since I meet yo pretty ass. It's on the tip of my tongue but you look like *somebody*.”

His eyes rolled back in his head as he tried to bring up who it was and then dismissed it.

“Fuck it!”

Then they got into talking about some tournament coming up at their high school, and that’s when I kind of zoned out of the conversation. I was looking at the joint in my hand and thinking I wonder how they came up with the name cannabis for weed. Such a funny word it sounded like cannibalism. So did the ones who make the cannabis eat the flesh of each other and then smoke it? I snorted in amusement. Damn! I must be a high cause that shit wasn't all that funny. Maybe I needed to let up a bit. I turned back into the conversation when I heard DJ say.

“Oh yeah. I wasn’t there today. I had some other shit to take care of.”

“That is one sexy, ass, bitch. Did you see the.”

What had I missed? Who were they talking about? I tried to concentrate but all I got was how big and delicious looking her ass and breasts were. Some RNB singer that I’d never heard off. I’m not really all that into RNB. I’m more into rap and hard rock every now and then. Sometimes I even listen to some country. Not that I'd admit to that. Moms listens to it sometimes in the car. Some of it is decent. I must have had a dazed, blank, look on my face because DJ looked at me like you don’t know who she is.

“How can you *not* know?”

Then he pulled out his phone and Goggled her. He passed me the phone so I could see images of her. I just stared at the screen. I was staring at sexy pictures after sexy picture of a woman with different shades of hair in provocative clothes. A woman with the same color eyes as mine. 

“That’s IT! I knew it would come to me. That’s who you look like.”

DJ exclaimed.

“Hey yal come here for a sec. Don’t he look like Reece?"

Reece, That was the first time I actually heard someone say her name. But Reece wasn't Chloe. Trey and Erron actually stopped the game and looked at the screen.

“Oh shit!”

Trey cussed and laughed.

“Yal really do. Yal could be twins.”

Erron said.

“Reke, are you related to Reece? Why you ain’t tell us?”

Reece? I tuned them out again and started to Google her. I think I *had* heard a song of hers on the radio that they’d playing a lot of. I’d always turned it because I thought the song was lame. Then I think I heard something about she’d dropped a surprise album recently and everyone was eating it up! I went to Wikipedia and started to read. Her name was Shereece Chantelle CHLOE Jamison. The status matched. The birthdate matched. She was originally from here and had the date she’d graduated Ramsey High matched up with around the date I was born. But it *couldn’t* be. From Wikipedia, I also found the name of her father (my grandfather). Kenneth. He was in some of the photos with her at certain events with his arm around her and the dark-skinned one. He was wearing a designer suit, tie, and matching shoes. My middle name was Ken. No, I thought. All this is just a coincidence. 

Ever since my mom had given me the news, not a day had gone by that I hadn't I’d laid in bed wondering. As I tossed my ball back and forth on the wall, I'd thought up every scenario humanly possible so that it would all make sense. It was clear she’d been scared. Maybe she possibly just didn’t come from much. You can’t give someone what you don’t have. Or had I been born from a fucked-up circumstance? Had I been born out of rape? Did the thought of having me repulse her and make her stomach turn when she knew one day she’d possibly have to look into the same set of eyes as the monster that impregnated her? Maybe her own parents were monsters themselves and turning to them wouldn’t do shit. Maybe they were in prison? Maybe they were abusive. Maybe they'd kick her out of the house if they found out. So many worse case scenarios ran through my head. But this man… Kenneth. Well, ain’t this some shit. 

It turns out my *grandfather* is a Doctor himself. I snorted. And it got better my *Grandmother* was supposedly an international, supermodel, that accidentally got herself blown the hell up in a plane explosion. I gave a snort of laugher to that. I finally found my voice and asked casually.

“Yeah. I think I *do* remember her now. I’ve heard her song. Do you think she’ll be in town long, I’d really like to meet her and get an autograph?”

I said smoothly. DJ looked at me like he knew that wasn’t quite the truth but didn’t say anything.

“Yeah. She said she’s gonna have this fashion show thing at the Boutwell.”  
Trey said shrugging it off. 

"Are you *sure* yal ain't related?"

Q asked looking back and forth at me and the screen of DJ's phone.

"Nah I know who my moms is, and her name is Leah."

They all kind of lost interest after that. I mean yeah they talked some shit about what they’d do to her if they got her in a hotel room (like they’d ever get her in a hotel room) but not surprisingly they don’t have any interest what so ever in attending the fashion show. Maybe I should have been offended by all that foul talk about the woman who could possibly be my birth mother, but I shrugged it off. What the hell had she ever done for me? It wasn't my place to defend her honor. After a while Trey had to leave for work, (he had a little job at Dominos in Western Hills Mall) and so did DJ (who ironically enough did DJ at a night club). On the way, driving me back he said.

“It might not be her. It might just be a coincidence.”

I didn’t say anything. I already knew. I didn’t want to know but I knew. He sighed.

“So, what do you want to do?”

I leaned my head back. 

“Talk to me. You know I got you.”  
“  
I want to do to that bitch, the same thing she tried to do me.”

I hissed. We rode the rest of the way to my house in silence. I let myself in the front door and was greeted with silence. It was just a little after 8:00 PM. I climbed the steps and headed straight for the kitchen, thinking maybe I could order from Door Dash if I didn’t see anything I was in the mood for. Maybe I’d be a good son and order Moms up something and bring it to her at the hospital. That’s when I noticed all the messages on the machine. I played one.

“Ty this is Lisa Burton. McKenzie’s grandmother. Can you please get me a call when you get this message? It’s important.”

There were several of those and I immediately called her back. It didn’t take her long to answer the phone.

“Hey, Mrs. Burton. It’s Ty. I noticed you called. I’m sorry I’m just getting back to you. I’m just getting back in. I was with some friends of mine. Is something wrong.”

“Ty. I’m glad you called. I didn’t know your cell phone number. I had to get your house number from the directory.”

“What’s going on?”

“Is McKenzie with you?”  
“  
No, I haven’t seen her.”

Kenzie and I had been seeing each other for a minute. Although I hadn’t heard from her in some days because of a stupid argument we had. I don’t even know why I did it. I accused her of since she didn’t wanna give it up to me, she must be giving it up to someone at that exclusive school she went to (the Birmingham School of Fine Arts). Of course, this had gotten her pissed at me and she’d hung up the phone in my face. I knew she wasn’t. Kenzie is a *good* girl. It was one of the things I loved about her, that she *wasn’t* the kind of girl to let you get it quick. I didn’t have a problem with waiting for her. She was worth it, but every now and then I just fucked with her just because. Then she’d always tell me if I wanted it so bad then maybe I should get it from one of the ones at my own school.

It wasn’t like I didn’t get offers. I could easily have one of them, girls, at Arrington Middle. But Nah I was good. Kenzie knew I wasn’t going no-where. Tho sometimes I liked to mess with her head. It had been a few days since she’d gotten at me. A bad feeling started to creep up.

“I was *really* hoping she was. McKenzie’s mother and father got into an altercation tonight.”

“Is… everything ok?”  
“  
Her mother is here with us at the ER at Brookwood.”

“She isn’t with you?”

“There’s been no signs of her father after the police were called. We think she may be with him. We’ve tried everything. We’ve called her cell. We’ve called his. Hers is going to voice. His is saying the number is disconnected. We’re all really worried. We’ve put up an Amber alert and it will be broadcast on the news and asked that if anyone has seen any signs of them to contact us.”

SHIT! I cursed to myself. 

“If there’s anything at all you can tell us. When was the last time you spoke with her? Has she texted you today?”

“The last time I spoke to her was Monday. We Facetimed about 7:00 but I haven’t heard from her since then.”

I quickly checked my phone to see if she’d texted me anything, but I didn’t see any new messages from her. The last text she’d sent me was a picture of her at the mall trying on this outfit she looked so damn sexy in. I would *KILL* that mofo if he did anything to her. I never liked his ass! If she didn't return he better be ready because he never would either. 

“Well if you hear from her could you please give me a call? If we get out of here, we’ll be back at the house.”

I promised I would and I made her promise she'd call me too if she heard anything. Then I ended the call. DAMN! My girl was missing. I needed to do *something* but I didn’t know what the hell *too* do. In vain I tried to call her cell hoping she’d pick up. She didn’t. I tried a few more times. Same stupid message.

“Kenzie. It’s me, Ty. You know I was just tripping, right? You got me worried boo. Call me please.”

DAMN IT! This was probably my fault. Just let her be ok. It wasn’t the first time in the past weeks Kenzie and I had gotten into it. Much like mom’s, she didn’t approve of some of my *ways* lately and hadn’t held her tongue that she thought I needed to kick DJ, Trey, and Erron’s ass to the curb. Then she told me she wasn't stupid and she knew about what I was doing and I was gonna get myself killed or locked up. I just brushed her off like psh whatever. I wasn’t trying to hear her. The paper had me deaf, dumb and blinded. 

Kenzie’s be aiight when by her 15th birthday she’d be driving up to her school in a ride that was so exclusive it wasn’t even on the sales floors yet. I’d even customize it in her favorite color. I wasn’t much of a prayer, but I silently said that if you bring her back I’ll .. well that’s a lie. I ain’t have no intention of giving up my hustle. But maybe I wouldn’t do it *as* much. My buzz was starting to wear off. I kept glancing at my cell every five minutes hoping it would ring and it would be her on the other end telling me she was about to come over. After that, I wasn’t really sure what to do with myself.   
My mind kept bouncing between Kenzie and *her*. I went downstairs still flipping through my phone. *Mother* sure had been *busy*, I thought as I clicked on a headline about some sex scandal involving her, another woman, and a man. I clicked on a grainy video of what clearly looked like her with a guy behind her and some lady kneeling in front of her. Her eyes were closed and she looked like she was enjoying the hell out of it. I tried to enlarge the screen to get a close up on the guy's face, but he was in shadow. Then I came across (disgustedly) some nude pictures she’d done for PLAYTOY (uncensored). EYE CANDY BEARS ITALL, it said. Maybe I shouldn’t be looking at this, but I didn’t owe this woman any respect. She *clearly* didn’t have none for her damn self.

My girl would *NEVER* consent to doing a shoot like that where everything was on damn display for the whole goddamn world to see. Upon Googling her a little further, I saw that she’d done a couple of movies. I pulled up the one called ALLOWAN ASHES on our HD TV, found it, then paid for it. I settled back in the chai

“This is the sword of Allowon. It’s a symbol of hope and peace. It is the promise of the Empire of Allowan to her people. The sword was given to the gods for safekeeping when the city of Allawon was destroyed by Queen Zorah-Karn’s brigade. I know return this sword to the rightful air.”

The red-head looked vaguely familiar so I googled her. KIMBER BENTON-PACHECO, Wife of RIO PACHECO. OWNER of STARLIGHT MUSIC (where *she* was employed) Also owned by her sister JERRICA BENTON. KEYBOARDIST AND LYRICIST OF POP GROUP JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS. It listed her movies and also said she had a talk show called the KIMOJI show. I’d recognized her from a soft drink commercial I’d seen recently.

“Me? But I’m nothing more than the daughter of a humble tavern keeper.”

“You are Zeliz, the Empress of Allawon. Your father Edur, is a faithful knight and servant of the people. He found you and raised you as his own. He has protected the *hope* of Allawon. He called you 

*Hope* for that is what you are.”  
“  
This can’t be happening!”

Then there *she* was.

“Hope? There is no hope for you or anyone else. Nothing can change what has happened to Allawon Queen Zorah-Karn has destroyed all hope and now that I know my enemy’s face, it will stay that way.”

“Who are you?”

“I’m Jay-Ka the Queen’s witch. I am here to kill you at my Queen’s command.”

YEEEAH something you seem to be a natural at, I thought with sarcasm.

“You need to learn your place traitor! I know what you’ve done.”

“What do you know of what I’ve done?”

She spat. I thought Oh I think I have a pretty good clue of what you did.  
“  
You and your sisters are merely witches, Jaya-KA. No matter how you disguise yourself. There are some things that never change. You must live with the consequences.”

And I would see to it that there would *DEFINITELY* be consequence! She hissed.

“I’m not here for my past. I’m here to destroy *her* future.”

Just like you tried to destroy mine hunh ma?

“Your part not only dictates her future but your own.”

Kimber turned to the brown-haired girl.

“You hold the sword of Allowan The sword is yours. It is up to you to dictate the witch’s future.”

The girl took the sword and pointed it dead at *her* chest. Stab her ass, I silently encouraged the girl.

“You destroyed me! The time is coming when your past will destroy you!”

I smirked to myself. So true lady! So true! I watched a little more of Allowan and ended up dozing off in the chair. I woke up around 11:00 and immediately checked my phone to see if anyone had texted. I didn’t have any messages well no important ones. I saw two from a couple of females I knew that were trying to get at me. One of em was cool with (or so she thought) my girl but was trying to get with me on the sly. I ignored both texts and decided that I’d head over to Brookwood Hospital to bring Mom’s something to eat in case she took her break and got hungry and didn’t want anything in the Cafeteria. Since Moms had the car, I’d have to take my Go-Cart. I really wasn’t supposed to be riding it, but if she asked I’d just say I got dropped off. It didn’t take me long to get the food (I’d already ordered ahead so all I had to do was pick it up). 

And soon I was pulling up to Brookwood Hospital. I found a space in the parking deck and then took the elevator and got out in a small section with snack and drink machines. There was a door that let me outside and in front of the hospital. I opened the door that lead to the front lobby of the building. It wasn’t too crowded that night. There were a couple of people sitting around on the couches and chairs at the entrance. I gave them a nod and then headed further down the hallway to the elevator, and took that up to the third floor where moms was stationed. When I got off on the 3rd floor, I immediately saw her on the phone with her back turned to me. I snuck up on her and said cleared my throat.

“Get off the phone and go do some work!”

I said in a deep voice. She jumped, saw it was me, and smacked my arm.

“BOY!”

I just smiled. To the person, she was talking to she said.

“Let me call you back.”

“Who you talking to? You better not be making personal calls to one of these doctors up here? Don’t make me have to rough one of these lil punks up.”

She rolled her eyes.

“What are you doing here?”

“Now is that any way to talk to your favorite son?”

I said swinging the food from behind my back and laying it in front of her on her station.

“I thought about you. Thought you might be hungry so I got you something.”

“Thank you, baby! I am STARVING!”

“You said we don’t spend any time together anymore so here I am.”

“Well, I’m happy to see you.”

“Ah, you just happy to see this Subway.”

I teased and grabbed the bag and pretended to yank it back, but she reached over and snatched it from me.

“Well *that* too! Seriously tho. You and Mackenzie didn’t have plans tonight or you and Jason and the team?"

Jason, she actually *liked*. Jason went to Arrington with me and was on the basket-ball-team. She liked him because he always made the honor roll and he always said yes mam and no mam and helped her with groceries and opened the door for her. That reminded me.

“Mrs. Burton called. Mackenzie is missing!”

“What!”  
She looked up from the sandwich she’d wasted no time unwrapping and digging into.

“They think her Dad took her. You didn’t get the alert.”

“My phone died. I think I left my charger in the car. Oh GOD! Have you heard anything?”

I shook my head.

"Have you seen them? They said they were in the ER."

"I've been up here since 6. I'll walk over and see if they're still here. Do they have any idea where he could have taken her?"

I shook my head. 

"I hope they find his sorry behind and cage him up like the dog he is. I told that girl when she first started working here to leave that man alone! God I hope it's not too late."

I knew she was thinking about that little girl “Cupcake” that went missing at a birthday party and there was this big hunt for her. Footage had surfaced of her getting in some unknown guy’s vehicle. Then her body had turned up weeks later raped and drowned in an alleyway. Kidnappings were becoming more and more common here in the HAM. And it was always common that if in 24 hours they weren’t found they were probably most likely *not* coming back. I didn’t even want to think about that so I changed the subject. I pulled up a chair. I was never one to just bs around when I wanted to know something so I asked.

“So why do you think she did it?”

Moms paused, chewed, and swallowed.

“I wish I could give you a straight answer to that. From what I can remember she looked scared, but that was half the young women that I saw that had unplanned pregnancies.”

“But she could have just .. given me up for adoption.”  
“  
Would that have made it better?”

She asked me slowly like she doubted it would.

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

Because she was *scared* just didn’t seem to justify not a *DAMN* thang! before a big game but that didn’t mean I went out and killed the coach and the other players on the team. I was scared before I took big tests, but I didn’t shoot my teacher’s up to get rid of em so I wouldn’t have to take the test.

“I’m not saying that it makes it right, but you don’t know what she was dealing with at the time Reke. I’ve been in this profession 20 years and some of the things I hear from these women sometimes that lead to the conception would make you sick to your stomach.”

“But it’s not their fault.”

I argued.

“Your right it’s not. I agree. All I’m saying is we don’t know her story.”

“She probably doesn’t even have a *story* and she just didn’t want me and was happy to get rid of me so she could keep living her life up.”

Mom’s sighed. 

"Ty."  
She was probably wondering if she’d made the right decision at all by telling me. I touched her hand in reassurance.

“But hey. It’s ok. I never needed her a (I corrected myself) I never needed her anyway. We have each other. I have *all* the moms I need right here.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to maybe try to get in contact with her. I know how rough this has to be. She may can answer some of the questions you have, better than I can. I’m sure there are agencies out there we can reach out to that will be able to track her down if she can be found. We might even be able to find out something about your biological father. There’s an avenue we haven’t even thought about.”

“You know what? It’s ok. I’ve gone this long without knowing and neither of them obviously want anything to do with me. So Nah I'm good."

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

Then I pulled up my CreepyPasta channel on YouTube and *entertained* her for a minute. As in had her looking at me like I don’t see how you watch this stuff. I always did have *interesting taste. 

“Well, I guess I’d better do my rounds.”

She said throwing the rest of the sandwich paper, chip bags, and soda cups in the trash. I told her I’d be there when she got back. Wasn’t like I had any plans. I’d rather be hanging around here with her than bored by myself back at the house. I was still looking at YouTube when I got a text. Immediately it sent a cold chill through me. The text said, “She’s here.”

My blood froze. She’s here. I read the words again. Immediately I scribbled a note to my mom and told her I was going back to the house and would see her later this morning. But before I did I slipped into the supply room when no-one was looking. Then walked back out. I went back home first and changed out of my jersey to something a little more suited dark pants, and a dark silky shirt, and a long leather jacket. Then I headed up to Club SKYY. DJ slipped me in through a back door and then left me to set up. The club was already LIT and hot RNB and RAP were being mixed in and out and blending into each other. People were swarming the dance floor and the bar. I quickly slipped into the back of the club and waited in a back room in the dark where the employees usually went to take a quick break.

I heard footsteps in the hall, and then the door opening. It timed it just right. I was on the guy in a flash, slipped my hand in my pocket, and cracked him upside the skull with the butt of my piece causing him to slid quickly to the floor before he realized what had even happened.

“Sorry!”

I mumbled to his laid-out body. Nice watch. Don't mind if I do. I leaned down slipped it off his arm, and slide it up my own. Then slipped out and jammed the door so if he woke up he’d stay there until someone else at the club found him (in the morning hopefully). Before I did I lifted his keys off him and his ID. I pinned his ID to my chest. And “CHRIS” went to claim his place back behind the bar.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The Summer of Secrets" continues as Harlem gets some unexpected news from his girlfriend Deja and he and Cara's past is revealed. Long time friends are reunited when Montreal pays Harlem a visit and apologizes for a betrayal that strained their friendship. Rap Battles used in this post can be found on You Tube's channel EPB. Harlem was an original character that was created as a law student turned rapper for the role-playing game Like A Dream. In Beyond his character has deteriorated from what I originally meant him to be as he's gone through fluctuations as a character. In showing his light and dark side as a character, it connects him to a previous, new, character we're just starting to learn about.

Harlem  
Promises  
I saw the sign that showed we were now entering Birmingham, Alabama. I’d taken over the wheel and let the ladies rest. Cara was on the seat beside me and her girl was in the back. It felt like it took forever. Between all three of us taking turns driving, we were able to cut a whole day and get here in 4 days, but we did have to stop and rest from time to time. One night we’d even rented a room. I know what you’re thinking, and nah nothing happened in that room. But things did get *interesting*.

For starters, the only room available only had 2 beds. That meant two of us would have to share a bed. Cara’s girl didn’t make it a secret who she wasn’t to share a bed with. And don’t get me wrong, she was fine, but that night I just wasn’t feeling up for it. So despite her getting in the bed with me in next to nothing but a T-shirt (that didn’t really cover anything), and rubbing up against me (not so discreetly), I felt nothing. The odd thing was, where normally this would have been all it took to get something started. When her hands got a little bolder (and started to wander a little further), I just had to apologize and tell her another time. She let up (probably figuring my head wasn’t right at the moment), and just laid against my back. I even had to wonder my self what *that* was all about. I just tried to put it off to bad timing.

I tried to sleep, but I just couldn’t go. The phone was going off, and I saw I had a Face Time call. So I slid out of bed and into the hallway. I hadn’t talked to Deja since she’d dropped by my place unexpectedly what felt like hours ago. I could have just let her call go to voice, but I knew that she’d just keep calling. And it was just best, to be honest with her. Besides, I really was trying to get my act together. Who I’d become, wasn’t really who I trying to be in the beginning. As I answered the call, I thought back to how I first meet Deja and how I’d let things escalate way too soon.   
I  
t was at the ESPN SPORTS CLUB, in Orlando on Christmas Eve. I had ended up in there, not because of Kimber and Rio’s wedding, but with some fraternity brothers who were going to a big, regional, conference that just so happened to be there. The line brothers I'd driven down with weren’t trying to spend Christmas Eve alone and had made other plans with females they’d either invited or hooked up with since we’d been here. At this point, I was kinda over females personally. There was some that since I’d arrived had expressed an interest, (discreetly and not so discreetly), but I had no desire to do anything other than simply engage with them in a brief conversation. I was trying to do my own thing. I’d wasted too much time with relationships and gotten off track of the plan (finishing school, getting my masters, passing the bar, and starting my own law firm). It was my fault. I wasn’t really watching where I was going. I’d just ordered a pint, and intended to give myself a nice lil Christmas Eve buzz. 

“I know you saw me standing there?”

She snapped hotly. I honestly hadn’t. I wasn’t wearing my contacts that night and the bar was dark.

“This is a *new* outfit!”

I was about to apologize, but something in her tone reminded me of someone that I’d known a long time ago so I mouthed off back at her.

“And that was a *new* drink?”

“And you’re not even gonna apologize.”

“I’m sorry. Sorry, you wasted my 10.00 drink all over the floor.”

I mumbled.

“I don’t know what your problem is but.”

I smirked at her stained blouse.

“Doesn’t look like *I’M* the one with the problem. You might want to do something about that.”

“You know what I *am* the one with the problem.”

“Yeah, and what’s that?”

“Your *breathing*. That’s a problem for me.”

She shoved me out the way hard and went to find a bathroom. I replaced my drink and decided I wanted some wings. There was a game being broadcast on the television and for a minute it had my attention. That is until she came back out of the bathroom and headed for the door. And that’s when I got a good look at her. Something about her 6ft, slender, athletic frame, and nice backside in those velvet pants, made me reconsider spending the rest of the night by myself. I remember hesitating for a minute, thinking to myself It’s not worth it. But then stupidly (still eyeing her from the back) I got up and headed out after her. In retrospect, I should have kept my behind in that bar and finished those expensive wings and beer. She was almost to where the shuttle buses pick you up when I caught up with her.

“Hey! Wait up.”

She turned around saw it was me and snapped.

“If you think I’m about to pay for your drink your crazy.”

“No. Hey, that wasn’t cool. I apologize for messing up your outfit. Although.”

I trailed off looking at the way it clung to her still wet. She snatched her jacket tighter around her to cover up her shirt.

“Come back to my room. Let me make it up to you.”

I told her letting my voice drop and moving closer to her.

“We can get your shirt dried at my place.”

She looked at me like I’d lost my mind. She mimicked me.

“We can get your shirt dried at my place. This shirt cost 200.00 and it’s *dry clean only*. So unless you have 200.00 at your place or a professional dry cleaner than I’m not going back to your place so you can try to get my shirt off.”

“200.00 hunh?”

She looked at me all serious and that’s when I noticed she had very odd gray eyes. 

“I don’t have 200.00, but if you come back to my room. I promise you you’ll get more than 200.00 worth.”

I hinted and let my voice ooze with sexuality. Ok, yeah so I'd had a couple before I even got to the bar. She sucked her teeth, rolled her eyes, and started to walk away from me. It became even more crucial to get her back to my room. I took a moment to just enjoy the view before I lazily caught up to her.

“You’re an ass. You know that? I’m not coming back to your room. You fucked up my shirt. You didn’t even apologize and now your trying to get me to come back to your room. Why the hell would I do that? I don’t even know your name And plus your DRUNK.”

“So, did you come here with someone?”

“Did *you* come here with someone?”

“A lot of someone’s.”

“Why am I not surprised?”

“It’s not like that. My Fraternity is holding regionals. I came with some of my brothers.”

“So what? They decided *they* didn’t want to be around you either. That’s why you're in a bar on Christmas Eve by yourself?”

I just shook my head in amusement.

“Actually, it’s the other way around. I had *offers* but.”

“I seriously doubt that.”

“I really wasn’t trying to be with no one tonight, but.”

I reached out for her hand and looked her in the eye.

“I’m glad I turned them down, because I think I found someone I’d rather spend Christmas Eve getting to know. Look, I really am sorry about your blouse. The *only* reason I’m here is because this trip was pretty much-taken care of. I have a little on me, but it’s not enough to take care of your blouse. But I really would like to make it up to you. We don’t have to go back to my room. Unless you know you want to. But we can go back inside and you can help me eat these chicken wings. Do you like sports? We can just chill here. I didn’t even ask your name?”

“It’s Deja.”

“Deja. That’s nice. I like that.”

“I don’t know. I need to get back. I need to get out of these clothes. I smell like beer and I think you got some in my hair."

“We can do that too."

She turned her back to me again.

“I just meant if you didn’t want to go back to your resort, mine is probably closer. I can give you something of mine to wear and there’s a bar there we can hang out in. I’ll even buy *you* a drink.”

“I am NOT going back to your room!”

The next morning we were laying in the bed together naked and I was playing with her braids.

"Good Morning!"

“Well I guess you *are* good for something.”

She told me gazing at me while she pulled me to her kissing me. Ready for another round of what I’d put down last night (and early into the morning)

“I think that was more than payment for what I owed.”

“Do you really think you were *that* good?”

I gave her a look like oh I KNOW I was. 

"I've had better."

"Oh, you've had better hunh?"

I said and then proceeded to show her I knew she was lying. Really what I *should* have done was made an excuse and got the hell out of there. I *should* have looked at my phone and told her one of my frats was texting me about a meeting we had today. That when I got out I'd call her later on, get her number, and then call her a day or so later. But eventually, just let things get less and less. To be fair I *did* tell her I wasn't looking to be in a relationship. But Deja had other plans for me, and ever since that night, I'd put it on her, what was supposed to be a one-night thing with an attractive girl I’d meet in a bar had turned into a life-long thing with a crazy, woman that had practically claimed me, gotten me to father a child with her, and then had all but moved into my apartment as soon as we’d gotten back to Orlando. I’m still not even sure if I love this woman.

“Hey.”

I told her softly as I accepted the call and let myself into Cara’s SUV. I needed some privacy.

“I haven’t heard from you.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I was gonna call you but things got a little crazy. I got some bad news.”

“Bad news?”

“My niece has gone missing.”

“What happened?”

She asked quietly.

“All I know is my sister and her husband got into a confrontation and now they can’t find her.”

“No.”

“Yeah.”

“Have they called the police?”

“Yeah. They have alerts out, but so far I haven’t heard anything.”

“Where are you? Do you need me to come over? Have you eaten anything?”

I paused.

“Don’t get mad. I’m on my way home. When I got the news I just left. I wasn’t thinking about anything else. I was gonna tell you tho. It just happened so fast.”

“Your driving by yourself? I would have drove.”

“I’m with Cara and a friend of hers. Cara was going back home so I got a ride with her.”

“Oh. I see. And where are they now?”

“We stopped for the night and rented a room.”

“I don’t see anyone.”

“Because I’m in the car.”

She was quiet.

“Remember what we talked about?”

I reminded her. When we’d last argued (well she’d started going off on me about not telling her I had that audition) I had to sit her down and have a little talk to her about trust. I’d told her that she needed to trust me. I promised her that I would do right by her and our baby and that I’d also be honest with her. But she *had* to stop tripping and doing crazy shit (like threatening to jump girls who just speak to me on campus. And either following me (or having one of her friends follow me) because she didn't trust that I was going where I said I was and to hook up with another girl_. Truthfully since I'd been with Deja I really hadn't been with anyone else.

I’d convinced her that it wasn’t good for the baby and that I didn’t want anything to happen to either one of them. I promised her that I wasn’t going anywhere. Maybe that’s why I didn’t try to get it in the room with Afrika. Whether I had planned this or not, I was committed to Deja now and I was trying. I braced myself for her to scream in my ear, but to her credit, she didn’t.

“So, you have separate rooms though?”

“Not exactly.”

“Why are you in the car?”

“The room only had two beds. I let them have the two beds. I’m gonna sleep in the car. I miss you.”

I said tenderly. And I seriously did. As crazy as Deja acted, it didn’t feel right to have anyone else in the bed with me. Maybe I was starting to care about her a little bit past just sexually and because she was carrying my child.

“I miss you too. They gave me the sonograms back today?”

She said softly. 

“Did you text them to me?”

“Check your phone.”

I did. But as I stared at the image trying to make it out it looked like two blotches. That couldn’t be right Then she dropped the bomb.

“We’re having twins.”

Uh, WHAT? I thought. I didn’t think I heard that right. Then she started rambling about the reveal party she wanted us to throw. I just kind of half-listened. I was still a little stunned. I was still trying to wrap my head around being the father of one baby and now I had TWO on the way. I convincingly conveyed the right amount of excitement about the news, but on the inside, I was thinking how the hell am I supposed to take care of two babies. I have a slightly decent job but I frantically was trying to calculate all the prices associated with babies and double them. Then she’d also been talking about us trying to find a place together because even though she claimed my place wasn’t big enough for her and the baby and me, I knew the *real* reason was she didn’t trust me being around a female roommate. Even though my roommate would probably much rather be kissing on her than me. 

“Isn’t Shereece’s fashion show this weekend?”

She asked and that got me out of my own head.

“Is it?”

I asked. Not even knowing anything about it. I hadn’t seen her since that dinner we’d gone to on Christmas day.

“I didn’t know. And no, it’s not like that.”

She *seriously* couldn’t think I had plans of hooking back up with my ex. Shereece and I were over a LONG time ago. I mean there had been that slip that one-time way back, but all that was in the past. We were both pretty much over each other. Deja didn’t say anything.

“Hey. The only thing on my mind right now is getting my niece back. After that, I’m coming straight back. That’s the *only* thing I’m trying to do.”

“I can drive down. I don’t want you to be by yourself. I can get a flight right now.”

“I want you here with me to Day, but I’m not gonna be the best person to be around. You know how I get and if I see *him* a side of me might come out that.”

She cut me off.

“I don’t care about *that*. I’ll kick that moto’s ass my damn self.”

She raged.

“And that’s *exactly* why you *shouldn’t* be here bunny. I love that you wanna be here with me, but it’s bad enough this happened to my family. I can’t risk letting something happen to my other family.”

“I’m making flight arrangements.”

She said and ended the call. I sighed and leaned my head back against the seat. FUCK! I cursed to myself. While a little part of me was turned on that she was so gansta that she would hop on a plane pregnant to handle whatever drama went down with my family, I still hadn’t told my family about my situation either. I wanted to at least talk to them first before she burst down the door telling my mom and pops.

“Hey I’m Harlem’s fiancée and by the way, I’m pregnant with his baby.”

For the umpteenth time, I wondered how I’d gotten here, but I was finally able to get a couple of hours that night. When I opened my eyes and saw it was morning I stretched my cramped muscles and headed back in to wake the ladies up, and offer to treat them to breakfast. That’s when I noticed something wasn’t right with Cara. When I walked back into the room, she was sitting up on the bed, staring blankly into space. But the crazy thing was tears were running out of her eyes. I’d slammed the door, and rushed over to her and sat down next to her.

“Cara. What’s wrong? What happened?”

She didn’t say anything.

“Cara, talk to me. What? Did you hear something?”

My nerves started to get slightly agitated. OH GOD, had she heard that Kenzie was... She was freaking me out. The tears just continued. She wasn’t saying anything. I followed her line of vision and it was on a phone on the side of the bed. So, someone *had* called. But who’d be calling us here? Maybe Shereece had called? Cinda? Had something happened to Ken? For a minute she just looked at me, got up, and then went to the bathroom, and locked the door. OH KAAY. I went over to the door and tried to pull it open, but she’d locked it from the inside. I had no idea what to do. Afrika wasn’t in the room and I don’t know where she’d gone. Banging on the door and calling her name didn’t do anything. I had the craziest thoughts of her in there trying to do something to herself. Eventually, I just told her I'd be n the car. And I sat there in the car wondering what I should do. Should I call 911 and tell them my friend was locked in the bathroom and wouldn’t come out? Should I got back and tell someone at the hotel? Should I call (OH GOD I didn’t want to do this) but Sheerece? Maybe Ken. I started to dial his cell phone (which he hadn’t changed since I’d first meet him) I smiled slightly. He picked up on about the 3rd ring.

“Hello.”

“Hey. Do you know who this is?”

He paused.

“Harlem?”

“I know it’s been a long time.”

“You got *that* right. Hey man! What’s been going on? Have you been alright?”

That was a loaded question. 

“I’ve been better.”

I’ve admitted.  
“  
"What’s going on man? You fell off the face of the planet. No one’s heard from you.”

“I’m on my way home now. We can talk when I get in town but I’m worried about Cara. She’s with me.”

“Cara’s with you? I’ve been trying to get in touch with her, but she won’t answer her phone.”

“I found out she was driving down and I needed to see my family so she offered me a ride. We’re at a hotel.”

Ken paused. I cleared that up quickly.

“No. Uh. The room didn’t have enough beds so I slept in the car.”

“Oh kaaay.”

I’d always respected Mr. Jamison so what he thought of me mattered to this day.

“Well I came back in the room to get Cara and a friend of hers that rode with us, but when I came in she was just sitting there on the bed crying. I tried to get her to talk to me, but she was just staring at the phone. Then she got up and locked herself in the bathroom. I didn’t know who to call. I thought maybe she’d heard something about you or Reece or Cinda. Or maybe the fashion show? My girlfriend was telling me it was in honor of your wife’?”

Kenneth’s voice sounded heavy.

“Where is Cara now?”

“I came out to the car. I thought since she wouldn’t answer me she needed a minute.”

Kenneth cursed.

“Harlem, I wish I could tell you more. All I know is Shereece came home some days ago and she told me something went down in Orlando with my daughter and Blaze, and now Blaze is dead. And Caryn isn’t accepting any of my phone calls. I’ve been trying to get in contact with any of her other family Shana or her biological father. I’ve left messages, but so far they haven’t returned any of my calls either.”

“She found her biological father?”

“A while ago and it turns out she and Shana share a father.”

“Wow! I didn’t know that.”

“Yeah. I was hoping he knew something. He was out there with them. I should have been there man. Something told me to just take the time off from work and take my lady out there and her niece and nephew out there for the holidays. I wanted to introduce her and her family to Shereece and Caryn and Lucinda. I just had this feeling, but someone else took off and we were short so I thought Orlando will be there.”

“Hey man. It’s not your fault.”

Blaze was an asshole ever since I’d first meet him. And as bad as it was to say this (and I hated it had come to this)I really wasn’t surprised that something like this had happened. If only things had gone differently all those years ago, Maybe it wouldn’t have come to this. I thought about this, as I looked at Cara now sitting across from me. She had been silent and didn’t say two words the rest of the drive here. When I tried to ask if she was ok she got short with me and said 

“I’m fine.”

When I told her Dad wanted her to call him, she said.

“I’ll call him later.”

So, I didn’t say anything else to her the rest of the way there. Right now, I was just staring at Cara. I have a confession to make. 13 years ago, I’d transferred from Birmingham Alabama from the Bronx in New York City where I’d grown up. My mom wanted to get as far the hell away from the grimy, streets, that had taken her husband away from her a young age. Four months later, she’d slept with and was exchanging vows to another man. A man that I could not STAND because not only was he my Dad’s friend, but his *best* friend. A friend who in my eyes had wasted *NO* time at all making his move on his widowed woman. I’d made myself a promise that *(* would NEVER be that man! To this day, that's held true. If I find out a women has someone else in her life or its one of my friend's women that's it PERIOD! They're off limits! I don't care if they're offering it to me or what.

When I first stepped through the doors of Ramsey High School, I felt eyes on me every step I took. The girls were throwing looks my way and secretly plotting how to get my attention. While the guys were on the sly sizing me up. And when I tell you there were some FINE, ASS, women at my high school. They were knockouts! But two women stood out above all the rest. The first one, I noticed while I was in Debate Class. I think what attracted my attention from the start was everything about her was just different. It wasn’t just her sexy, mocha, skin tone. It was her cool, indifferent, demeanor. She just didn’t seem to sweat me like the others.

She barely even looked at me. That made me wonder cause I knew *(* just knew I was looking good. So why was she act like *she* hadn’t noticed. I just sat there in debate class, looking at her. I’d been at Ramsey a week, and I’d had yet to see her with anyone. But that didn’t mean she didn’t have a man. Maybe he just went to another school. As I looked at her long legs, *wondering what they’d feel like wrapped around me* I was truthfully feeling kind of agitated because I just wasn’t used to girls not noticing me. Back home I’d been voted the most popular guy, the most good looking, and the most athletic at my old school. My teacher came in and announced the assignment.

“Good Morning Class! I have something a little bit different for you guys today. For our first assignment, we’re going to have a Rap Battle.”

This immediately got my attention because I knew I could hold my own when it came to rhyming. Sometimes my boys and I would mess around freestyling back home, bragging on whose skills were the best. Not to brag but none of them could hold a candle to my flow. This was one assignment I knew I was gonna ace, and then let's see her ignore me. Maybe then *I’d* flip it on her and not pay *her* any attention when she tried to be all on me when she found out I was a BEAST in rap battles.

“There will be two teams and each day someone will go up against someone on the other team. I think maybe we’ll have time for three battles a class period. The one who loses the battle will be eliminated. And we’ll keep going until only 2 remain and the one who wins that battle will be the winner. We can all agree on some sort of prize for the winner. Your rap will be 3 minutes in length and then you'll hear the timer. Alright?”

There were murmurs. 

“Good. I’ll pick the teams and then I’ll give you your subjects.”

Interesting, I had Michael Jordon. I’d be facing off against a guy on the B Team that had Muhamad Ali. I stopped her on the way out.

“Excuse me.”

She turned to look at me like yes.

“Hey. I’m new so I’m still trying to find my way around. I was wondering if you could show me how to get to the gym?”

My plan was to get her to walk with me to the gym and maybe I could try to spit some game at her. But she just pointed me in the direction of the gym, told me I couldn’t miss it, and then told me she took off for her next class. 

“Thanks.”

I’d mumbled to myself since she was already gone. Ok, so *that* hadn’t worked. It just made me even more determined. There was another girl, that I’d catch eyes with. This one was bright skinned and had long hair. Whereas the first one seemed to always be to herself, this one always seemed surrounded by a crowd. Now this one did act like she wanted me to say something to her, but at the same time, she acted like she didn’t want to go out of her way to be *too* available either. In other words, she was playing a game of who’d come to who first. And with this one, I wanted to see just how long it would take for us to play this little game of hers because I knew she’d be the one to break before I did. I could tell she was the type that was used to getting her way, and I just felt like messing with her and not making it easy to be got. I could see myself with either of them, and I wanted both of them.

The next day in class, I went up against a guy name Montreal. He laughed as we walked up to the front of the class and teased.

“You going DOWN son!”

“We’ll see.” 

I said cool, calm, and confident. But I could tell right from the jump I liked this guy’s energy. Our teacher announced.

“Welcome to Epic Rap Battles of History. In the ring today we have two of the greats We have basketball royalty. His Airness.MICHEAL JORDAN VS the heavyweight boxing champion of all times Muhammad ALI. BEGIN.”

I started off.

“WHY DON’T YOU DODGE THIS BATTLE LIKE YOU DID VIETNAM. CAUSE YOU GOT AS MUCH CHANCE AS BEATING ME AS LEBRON. IM A FLYING MACHINE. LIKE THE WORLD HAS NEVER SEEN. YOU CAN FIGHT ONE MAN. I DRIVE THROUGH THE WHOLE TEAM. I CHOKE A DOKE WITH HIS OWN JUMP ROPE. (I did a jump rope move). YOULL GET SMOKED WHEN I FLOW. YOU KENTUCKY FRIED JOKE (Montreal makes a motion with his arm to wave me off). USED TO FLOAT LIKE A BUTTERFLY STING LIKE A BEE. NOW YOU DOUBLE DRIBBLE BALLS THAT NOBODY CAN SEE.”

Montreal rapped.

“OH HERE COMES JORDAN. BIG TONGUE WOBBLING. FLYING THROUGH THE AIR LIKE A BIG, DUMB, GOBLIN. YOU’RE THE ONLY BULL THAT’S UGLIER THAN RODMAN. MESSING WITH ME IS GAMBLING. YOU GOT A PROBLEM. YOUR WHOLE BASKETBALL CAREER HAS TURNED WACK. WHEN YOU CAME BACK A WIZARD LIKE GANDOLF THE BLACK. YOU SHOULD HAVE KEPT YOUR UGLY SNEAKERS PACKED UP ON THE SHELF. STICK TO GOLF YOU CAN KEEP THE BALL TO YOURSELF. IM SO PRETTY. MY HANDS ARE SO FAST. ILL WHUP. YOUR FACE BACK TO YOUR HITLER MUSTACHE. NOW YOUR DADDY GOT KILLED AND I FEEL FOR YOUR FAMILY. BUT YOUR BASEBALL CAREER NOW THAT WAS A TRAGEDY.”

Ok I see you, I thought. 

“MAN YOU MAKE ME SICK. BUT IM BETTER WITH THE FLU. YOU SHOULD LET THE FRESH PRINCE DO YOUR RAPPING FOR YOU. I WOULD PASS THE MIC TO PIPPEN BUT I’M NOT DONE SCORING. STAY ALL UP IN YOUR GRILL LIKE MY NAME WAS GEORGE FORMAN.

Montreal came back.

“I SAW YOU SLAPPING REGGIE MILLER. BOY, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? YOU FIGHT JUST LIKE THE LITTLE GIRLS THAT MAKE YOUR NIKE SHOES. MCDONALDS AND UNDERPANTS AS CORPORATE BACKERS. YOU STAY AT THE RITZ CAUSE YOU SOLD OUT TO CRACKERS.”

I nodded alright. You wanna go *there*.

“SO, CASSIUS WANTS TO TALK ABOUT CASHING CHECKS. ILL SCHOOL YOU THROUGH YOUR BUG SPRAY OFF YOUR BROADWAY PLAY OVER THE JAPANESE DUDE SITTING ON YOUR FACE. HIT NOTHING BUT NET YOU AINT SEEN NOTHING YET. MAN YOU NEEDED A MOVEMENT CAUSE YOU SO FULL OF CRAP. IM A BETTER ATHLETE AND A BETTER MC. BATTLE ME TWO MORE TIMES WATCH ME GET A THREE-PEAT.

BEEP BEEP WHY DON’T YOU BACK UP THAT TRASH. ILL LEAVE YOU LISTON FLAT ON YO. YOU NEED TO BOUNCE BACK TO NORTH CAROLINA KID. CAUSE YOUR RAPPING SUCKS MORE THAN SPACE JAM DID. 

The teacher rang the bell. Even tho, I kicked Treal’s behind in that rap battle from that day on we’d been boys. Well that is until later. Cara was up next. 

“Alright! Alright! That’s how the way to kick off Rap Battles. Up next we have the MOTHER OF DRAGONS, the CHAIN BREAKER DAENERYS VS THE MISTRESS OF EVIL MALEFICENT BEGIN.”

Caryn was Maleficent. The other girl she was up against name was Kelly. Caryn started it off.

“WELL, WELL, OH DEAR. WHAT AN AWKWARD SITUATION. IM QUITE DISTRESSED TO NOT AT LEAST RECEIVE AN INVITATION TO YOUR KNEELING SUPPLICATION. IM THE RHYMING RUINATION THAT WILL PUT YOUR PUNY NATION IN SUSPENDED ANIMATION.”

Kelly cut in.

“I AM DAENERYS STORMBORN. FIRST OF MY NAME. YOU CAN CALL ME KHALEESI. THE BREAKER OF CHAINS. YOUR INSANE BRINGING BATTLE WHY YOU DIGGING YOUR OWN GRAVE? ILL SNAP YOU LIKE THE COLLAR ON A FREE CITY SLAVE. 

Caryn came back with.

“YOU KNOW IM JUST SO DELIGHTED BY YOUR FAMILY’S BAD LUCK. A CURSE WOULD BE USELESS. YOU ALREADY SUCK. FIRST DADDY WENT MAD. THEN YOU KILLED YOUR OWN MOTHER. HOT HEAD BROTHER WAS MURDERED BY THE HUSBAND YOU SMOTHERED. BUT ALL MEN MUST DIE. I WISH THAT THEY WOULD. THE TRUTH IS IM RUTHLESS I MAKE BAD LOOK GOOD. MEDIEVAL EVIL WITH A NEEDLE. LETHAL LYRICAL AS WELL. ILLINEST VILLAINESS WHOSE KILLIN THIS WITH ALL THE POWERS OF HELL.

Kelly made a face.

“WHATEVER ELVIRA. YOU CALL THAT A VERSE? YOU’RE A FAIRY TALE BULLY. FIND AN INFANT TO CURSE. AND WHATS YOUR OBSESSION WITH FINGERS AND PRICKS? FORGET SPINNING WHEELS YOU SHOULD CONJURE. THESE HOCUS POCUS JOKER BEST GET OUT OF MY GRILL. THE ONLY THING MAD ABOUT ME IS MY SKILLS. LIKE A SWORD THROUGH YOUR HEART LET THIS POINT SINK IN. THIS HOTTIE FREED THE SLAVES. CALL ME BABE RAHAM LINCOLN. 

Then Cara went.

EAT YOUR HEART OUT SWEETIE. BETTER STOP COUNTING SHEEP. WELL BE SCORING WHILE YOUR SNORING IN PERPETUAL SLEEP. NO PRIVATES IN YOUR ARMY. THAT’S NUTS. YOU ALL SHOW SO MUCH … IT SHOULD BE CALL GAME OF BUTTS. ISNT IT SCARY WHEN WHEN YOUR FORCED INTO MARRY’N SURROUNDED BY HAIRY MEN AND LOSING YOUR CHERRY THEN YOUR BABYS MISCARYN BARGAIN BARBIE BARBARIAN. LIKE THE LAST DEAD VALERIAN I WILL BURY HOUSE TARGARYEN.

DAYUM CARA WAS ON FIRE! But Kelly came back on her.

“IF YOUR SO POWERFUL THEN ANSWER ME THIS.WHAT KIND OF CRAP MAGIC GETS DESTROYED BY A KISS? ALL IN BLACK WITH THOSE HORNS? YOU LOOK LIKE A BURNT GOAT. ITS DONE. SICK A FORK IN IT. THAT’S ALL SHE WROTE. SHOWS OVER. SOON YOULL BE A FEAST FOR CROWS. JOHN SNOW KNOWS THESE BOZOS GOT NO FLOW AND ALTHOUGH I ROSE FROM THE ASHES. NOW IM A FORCE YOU CANT STOPPED. I STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM NOW I FINISH ON TOP.”

“YOU THINK THAT WAS HOT! IT'S NOT EVEN WARM. COME TO MY WORLD AND SEE MY TRUE FORM. I LIKE YOUR STYLE KID, BUT ITS TIME TO RETIRE. SPOILER ALERT! IM ABOUT TO SPITFIRE!”  
“IM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS YOU CAN'T BURN ME. THE BEST DON’T REST ITS MY DESTINY. SO AFTER I FINISH YOU I HAVE A EMPIRE TO BUILD. WATCH YOU SCREAM WHEN YOU DIE LIKE THE LAST WITCH I KILLED. “

Our teacher rang the bill. I stopped up and clapped. He did too.

“That was HOT! Alright! Alright! I think we have time for one more.”

Cara, and I actually made it as the last two in Rap Battles. I remember when I was about to go up against her to declare the winner right before class started I went up to her.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”  
“I just wanted to say good luck. Not that you’ll need it. You got SKILLS girl. Who taught you how to rhyme like that?”

I said in admiration of how she had taken down everyone in the class she had gone up against.

“Nobody had to teach me.”

She answered smugly.

“Alright, I feel you. So how about this. Not only does the winner get bragging rights and that Itunes card for 50.00 but the loser has to treat the winner to whatever thing the winner chooses?”

“Anything the winner chooses hunh?”

*Anything*.”

I said smoothly and tried to make my hint obvious that it could *really* be anything. No offers were off the table if she wanted to take it there. Watching Cara slay lyrically in class had gotten me soo worked up. I was ready to take her then and there.

“You’re on!”

She told me. For our last battle, Mr. Robinson decided to switch it up and put us with two of best other rap battle winners. I got Kelly and Cara got Treal. Kelly and I were Romeo and Juliet and Cara and Treal were Bonnie and Clyde. 

“Alright, guys this is our last one. Let’s make it count. I’m proud of each and every one of you for all the hard work you’ve put into this assignment. You all have really gotten into character! Good luck and may the best team win.”

He cued the music.

“FOR OUR FINAL RAP BATTLE WE HAVE TWO ICONIC COUPLES. IN ONE CORNER WE HAVE ROMEO AND JULIET. IN THE OTHER CORNER WE HAVE BONNIE AND CLYDE! BEGIN!”

Treal begin.

“ILL HANDLE THIS DARLIN. I’M KNOWN TO FIRE OFF SOME BARS. IF THESE LOVERS CROSS ME THEYRE GONNA END UP SEEING STARS. (Cara) I MEAN ILL LET YOU GO FIRST BUT DAMN SURE IM GETTING LICKS IN.ON THIS HISSY FITTIN RICH KID AND HIS PREPUBESCENT VIXEN. IM SICK OF THEM. (Treal) LETS BEAT EM THEN. AND WE CAN ROB EM BLIND. ILL STICK THIS PUNK UP FROM THE FRONT (Cara) ILL TAKE THIS BROAD FROM BEHIND AND POP A CAP IN THAT OF THE LAST CAPULET HEIRESS GIVE MISS NO NIGHTS IN PARIS A REASON TO CRY TO HER PARENTS. (Treal) O ROMEO O ROMEO WHEREFORE YOU TRYING TO FLOW YO? MO FO YOU SOFT AS A FROYO. ARE THOSE DRAPES OR YOUR CLOTHES BRO? THERES GONNA BE A TRAGEDY. (CARA) MAKE U ACHE LIKE UR BALLS ON THE BALCONY. (Treal) BARROW GANG PUT THEIR MONEY WHERE THEIR MOUTH IS. (Treal and Cara) SPIT SICK LIKE A PLAGUE ON BOTH THEIR HOUSES.

(I turned to Kelly) MY LOVE YOUR FACE IS BEAUTY TO BEHOLD. I WILL PROTECT IT WITH HONOR FROM THESE DUST BOWL DILDOS. (Kelly touched my face) A MOMENTS BREAK FROM YOUR GAZE IS AN ETERNITY PASS. SO TOGETHER WE SHALL BOTH PUT THESE ON BLAST. (Me) ON GUARD THOU ARTLESS BEELE HEADED FLAX WENCH. THE ONLY INSULT YOU HAVE THRUST UPON ME IS THAT STENCH. WHY DON’T YOU TWIST UPON THESE NUTS? I HEARD YOUR GOOD WITH A WRENCH. THE DISMAL STATE OF YOUR RAPS SHOULD BE A FEDERAL OFFENSE. (Kelly) AND YOU THERE A WENCH WITH THE NECK OF A CHICKEN YOU GET A RIPPIN WORSE THAN YOUR BOYFRIENDS IN PRISON. YOUR NOT A TRUE ROMANCE. YOUR JUST A CONJUGAL VISIT. OH WAIT THAT’S NOT EVEN YOUR REAL HUSBAND NOW IS IT?   
(Treal) HEY PARTNER YOU BEST PUT A MUZZLE ON YOUR MISSUS. FOR I TEACH HER HOW WE HANDLE DISRESPECT DOWN IN TEXAS. (Me) DO YOU QUARREL SIR? SHALL I DRAW MY LONG SWORD? OR WILL U DUCK YOUR CHICKEN BACK INTO YOUR FORD? (Cara) HOW COULD YOU BEAT MY MAN IN SOME MANO A MANO? YOU CANT PROTECT YOUR BEST FRIEND FROM SOME JOHN LEGUIZAMO. (Kelly) NO NO, MY ROMEO WILL EAT YOUR BEAU IN CONTEST BLOW FOR BLOW. HE WILL DO UPON THINE WHAT U HAVE DONE UPON YOUR TOE. 

The bell rang. Cara and Treal were awarded the ITUNES cards. But I felt like I’d won something else. Cara and I did go out. As her pick she choose LASER TAG at this spot called GAME ZONE and we had a great time! By this time Treal and I were getting to be even tighter because we’d both just gotten on the basketball team further cementing our friendship. Sometimes on the weekends, we’d all go to the movies or on the weekends the rink. I wanted to ask Cara then but for some reason, I didn’t feel like it was the right time. (Don’t ask me why). Maybe if I would have spoken up a whole lot sooner. But at the same time, while I was into Cara like that other girls were starting to try to holla at me. So I got distracted as we tend to do when so many different ones are throwing it at us. 

After that, sometimes we’d hang at lunch but when we got on the team I didn’t hang with Cara as much. Shereece still hadn’t made any moves yet A year later, and we picked it up again when she got on the girl’s basketball team, and we started to hang out at away games. Around October, I was thinking about inviting her to the CLASSIC and some of the events. Possibly even asking would she be my girl. But then when I tried something weird happened. I’d caught up with her in the hallway by her locker. 

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

Right thing I could tell something was off. There was this awkward silence that hadn’t been there before.

“I wanted to ask you something.”

“Ok.”

I’d got myself all hyped up to do this. I’d made sure I had a fresh cut and I remember that day I had on all black silk shirt and pants.

“So you know the Classic is this weekend right?"

“Yeah. So I heard."

“So are you gonna go to the game or any of the events?”

I named a popular rapper who I heard was gonna do the half-time show. Cara made a face.

“It’s really not my thing. All that crowd and all those people out there trying to show off. I’ll pass.”

“Yeah. I feel you.”

I said even though I didn’t mind if. Not everything was for everybody. The important thing was I just wanted to spend time with her.

“Maybe we can do something else. I really don’t feel like being here anyways. Rick’s other kids are coming into town. I can get the car and we can ride out and go to T-Town or the A for the weekend. Just us.”

Cara slammed her locker.

“I really don’t think that’s a good idea. But I’ll call you.”

And then she was gone. I’ll call you? Yeah ok. I knew when I was being brushed off. But I didn’t really know *why*. I thought Cara and I were cooler than that. Clearly something had changed between us and she wasn’t feelin me like that no more. Well, two could play that game. I’d marched right up to Shereece’s locker and told her.

“We’re going to the game this weekend. I’ma pick you up an hour before it starts. You gone be ready?”

She just looked at me like it took you long enough and said cooly.

“I’m *always* ready!”

I finally pulled up to my sister’s house and parked the car. It was still. There weren’t any lights on. Her car was there, but his wasn’t. 

“Hey. I’m sorry I scared you. I’m ok.”

Caryn said quietly.

“I had a bad dream. That’s happened a lot lately. I just needed a minute.”

“You really scared me. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you that shook up.”

“Sometimes I scare me too.”

She admitted. 

“Come inside with me. I wanna check something out.”

I got out and opened her door for her. I had a spare key to the house, but instead of letting myself in downstairs or going around the front, I pushed open the gate that lead to the back yard. It was getting dark so I had to use the flashlight on my phone to find the right spot. Cara asked curiously.

“What are we looking for?”

I found the spot in the yard that convincingly looked like it was covered with overgrown grass. I kneeled down and lifted something up and pushed it aside.

“A long time ago Kenzie discovered this. We were just playing around with water guns and she fell down and banged up her knee. You can still faintly see the scar. Back in the day I think they called them fallout shelters.”

I motioned for Cara to follow me down the stop that had a ladder dug into the dirt. I explained.

“So every time they’d get into it she’d come down here and disappear for some hours. I’m the only one that knows.”’

I called her name. Everything in me was hoping I’d hear her answer me back, but all I heard was my own voice echoing off the walls. I cursed in frustration. I just *knew* she’d be here. I sank down to the ground tired and defeated. Cara sat down beside me.

‘Hey. She’ll be ok. They’ll find him. She might not even be with him. Do you know her friends? Maybe she’s with one of them. Maybe she heard them and left immediately.”

“Then why isn’t she answering any of our calls? She has to know that we’re all worried.”

Cara got quiet. Then she reached out to put her arms around me. I just leaned my head back against the wall and closed my eyes.

“My niece is gone.”  
I said to no one in particular stating the very obvious. A memory was running through my head of being at the hospital and her being placed in my arms when she was born. I'd even been the one to snip the cord. I felt my eyes starting to water up.

“My mom use to disappear for days on end. It would scare the shit out of me. I didn’t know if she was hurt or dead. Then she’d always waltz her ass back in the door like she’d just stepped out to get some cigarettes and it was all good. I never even knew where the hell she went. But she always came back.”

“Why did you walk away from me?”

I mumbled. Cara got quiet.

“In high school. Why did you walk away from me?”

I wanted to say I thought I meant something to you.

“She didn’t tell you?”

She muttered. 

“She saw how close we were getting, and she threatened me to stay away from you. She hinted that if I didn’t she’d find a way to get me expelled. We actually got in a big fight over you. I told her to stay the hell out of my business and what I did with you was between me and you.”

“But you cut me off.”

Cara sighed heavily.

“We were both involved with the DIAMOND DOLLS (dance team). We got close. I saw how much you meant to her so I backed off. Then we became sisters.”

I must have not have meant that much to her. But really did it matter now?

“Deja’s coming tomorrow. She’s having twins.”

I don’t know what happened next. I was empty. I was tired. I was angry. I was scared. I was horny. I looked at Cara with her head on my shoulder and her arms wrapped around me and I leaned down and brushed my lips against hers. She didn’t pull away from it so I started to intensify the kiss. After a second tho when I tried to pull her on top of me in my lap facing me she pulled back and stood up.

“The promise.”

She muttered reminding me. Yeah, that damn promise. 

"I really don't think that applies anymore."

I mumbled wanting her to come back over to me so we could continue. She stood up. Suddenly I just wanted to be by myself. My tone changed.

“You should go. Your Dad’s looking for you.”

“I’m not going back to Dad’s house. I’ll probably rent another room.”

“Ok.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“I think I’m just gonna stick around here.”

And try to put out my head what your not trying to do with me. Then I wanted to be here waiting for his ass in the dark with a little *welcome home* surprise if he showed back up. Cara hesitated.

“I don’t think you should be by yourself.”

She probably saw it in my eyes that some shit was about to pop off. He had to bring his ass home sometimes and when he did.

“Go home, Caryn! You need to talk to your Dad and I need to be by myself right now.”

I almost told her I'll call you like she had me all those years ago. But I knew my bad mood really wasn't about her. She stood there a minute and then moments later I heard the car pulling off above me. I closed my eyes again. DAMN, I shouldn’t have used that tone with her. But every, single, time I tried to get close to Caryn she pushed me away for some reason or the other and I was getting tired of that. We weren’t in high school anymore. Sleep finally took me, and I dozed off down there and went to sleep. 

When I woke up, I had no idea what time it was. When I climbed out the sun was just coming up. The house still looked like it didn’t have any signs of life. So, I decided to take a little walk up the street to the Waffle House. Thankfully Cara had left my bags by the door. So I let myself in and took a quick shower in the bathroom downstairs. When I got out and looked more presentable, I heard the front doorbell ringing. I opened the door, and standing there was the last person I expected to see.

“Treal.”

“I knew you’d be here.”

“What are you doing here?”

“It’s offseason. Me and some of the fellah’s decided to fly in. Thought I’d check up on the family. I was getting off the plane when I saw the news. How are you holding up?”

“I’m hungry.”

I said simply.

“I was about to get out of here and hit up Waffle House.”

“Sounds like a plan. I got you. My rental’s outside.”

Treal and I ordered our usual. Steak and Eggs for me. Omelet, Hash browns, and Bacon for him. It felt like old times.

“Man we must have hit up this place so many times They oughta have a dish named after us.”

Treal smiled in memory. 

“I’m surprised they haven’t named one after you.”

He just shrugged it off.

“Nah.”

Things had taken off for him since that day. My mind flashed back. Treal was trying to get me to audition for a talent competition that was going going to be held at a night spot.  
"   
"I'm about to take you to schoolboy!" 

Montreal threatened. He stole the ball and broke past me. I tried to block him. He jumped up and dunked the ball through the rim and hung there for a second. Showing off cause we had the attention of some of the ladies that were hanging out in the gym. 

"All right show me something!"

I took the ball and dribbled it between my legs doing a crossover. In and Out I wove the ball with speed. He made a move like he would get it from me but I turned my back to him. I ran toward the goal, jumped, and POWER SLAMMED it through the hoop HARD. I heard 

"OOOOOOHHHHH "

from my audience.

Treal smirked 

"Please I thought you had something!"

"What you think you can do better?" 

"Think" 

He raised his eyebrows.

"Think! Stay right there. I'm about to show you why they call me FLIGHT."

He motioned for two guys to come over to where we were. He leans in and says something so low I can barely hear him. What's he up to I think?

"Stand back and prepare to take lessons."

He pushes me back a little. He then strolls confidently halfway across the court. The two guys position themselves in front of the goal. Oh helllll Nah! I know he ain't bout to try to jump over them and dunk! This I had to see. I folded my arms. 

"Ain't no way you're going to make that. You know that right? Should I get the car ready to take you over to the emergency room when you fall and land on yo ass?"

I laughed. 

"Oh, ye of little faith. What you gone do if I make it?" 

He said confidently. I shrugged.

"If you make that I'll give you twenty dollars."

"Oh yeah." 

I nodded.

"And?" 

He asked.

"And? And what. What you want? That's all I got on me."

"If I make this shot I want you to go down to the Stardome today. Right after we walk out of here as a matter of fact and sign up to be in that talent contest." 

He knew I had been putting it off. 

"Treal."

I sighed. 

"If I don't make the shot you don't owe me nothing and I'll get off your case about it for good" 

"Put that on the word." 

I crossed my arms. 

"You won't never hear nothing else about it from me. I'll leave you the hell alone and the subject DEAD." 

He promised.

"In fact, I'll enter the contest my damn self oh and I'll give you the money I make when I win. Well half. Cause you know I did whup your ass in that rap battle we had."

He said talking smack.

"You know you only won that because Cara *choose* you as her second right? I took you out the first round."

"Whatever! Is it a deal."

I frowned and took in the goal and the two guys waiting there. 

"Deal." 

I finally agreed. 

"Oh, and to make it interesting and because we brother's I'm going to through in a little something special for ya!" He wiped his sneakers and dribbled the ball.

"Oh, and what might that be?" 

I asked amused.

"You'll see. Oh and Jay."

"Yeah."

"When I make this shot and your CD hits I want you to remember what I said."

I nodded because I understood where he was coming from. But there was just as much as chance of *that as it was of me getting back together with her (Shereece). I watched as he calculated his moves. You could hear a penny drop in there. The took off at top speed like it was nothing! He ran toward the dudes and just as his name suggested he jumped into the air and flew toward the backboard but the interesting part was he had twisted himself around. Treal had dunked the ball BACKWARDS

Someone had uploaded the video and it had gone viral. After that, his phone was blowing up with offers to start a training camp for a popular NBA team. Things started to happen for him quickly after that. He dropped the easy, playful, manner that had made us friends all those years ago.

“But are we good tho?”

I knew one day we’d have to have this conversation. I just didn’t have the energy to have it today.

“Why man?"

Treal sighed and twirled his fork in his fingers. It looked like he wanted to say something but didn’t quite know what to say.

“Harlem, I’m sorry. I know that doesn’t make up for what I did. But you have to believe me I’m so sorry. I never meant for it to come between our friendship. It just happened."

“You could have had *any* one else Treal.”

“I know. At the time I guess I tried to tell myself you said you were over her.”

“And that made it ok? I would have never done that to you! I thought we had a code."

“I know man. I know. I was wrong and I’ve thought a lot about it over the years. Since Harlem, I’m sick man.”

“Sick? What do you mean you're sick? You look alright.”

“I tested positive.”

I dropped my fork and studied Treal’s face to then say “I gotcha” or “Sike” but he looked dead ass serious.

“You aren’t joking are you?”

He shook his head.

“I’ve dated both men and women.”

“Since when?”

I looked at him in disbelief. Treal had never given me *any* indication that he preferred the opposite sex. But then again he had been around all those men in the NBA. I tried to let this sink in.

“For a couple of years now. I’ve been able to keep it out of social media for the most part. It’s been expensive and I’ve had to pay off and track down some publications. I’ve also gotten some blackmails. It hasn’t been easy. But your my best friend so I had to tell you. I got the results about a month ago.”

“Shit Treal! I mean do you have to do treatments or.”

“I have options. I’ve been talking to my Doctor.”  
“  
Damn man that’s. I don’t know what to say.”

He smiled a little.

“It’s ok. I’m sure I’ll get more than enough *say* when I tell my mom. I just had to tell *you*.”

If Treal told me he’d always had a crush on me or something I think my head would explode. I don't think I could take any more bombs dropped on me today. He was looking at me for some kind of reaction. I didn't feel like being mad at him anymore. I had been long enough. 

“You know what? We’re good. All that’s in the past.”

“And what I told you about me? It doesn’t bother you?”

“It’s really not my place to judge you for the choices you made man. We all have to live our own lives. I’m just sorry this happened. But if you need me for anything I’m here. I always have been. That’s never changed and it never will.”

“How can I help you? I want to make this right. I NEED to make this right.”

“Unless you have access to a super-computer that can hack into databases, pull traffic light stop images of vehicles, and traceback transactions I’m not sure there’s anything *too* do.”

“This shouldn’t have happened to Kenzie!”

He said angrily.

“So, what do you wanna do man? Tell me.”

“First, I need to check on Moms, Rick, and my sister. I’m not even sure where they are. They might be at Mom’s place.”

“I feel you.”

“Then I think I need to go back to my sister’s place.”

I trailed off. Treal seemed to get my meaning and leaned back in his seat.

“Then that’s what we’ll do. So you got it with you?”

“I never leave home without it.”


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trying to escape for the night from the stress of the previous months, Cinda is looking forward to a night of just partying. But that all comes to a halt when a familiar song begins to play on the dance floor. Before she can collect herself, Reece makes a confession to her about the real reason she came back to Birmingham. We then learn one of the long-term effects that using Techrat's chambers have caused on Shereece. The songs used (Jumpin Jumpin), (Hot Sugah) and (No Love) are by Destiny's Child, Tamar Braxton, and Faith Evans.

Lucinda  
It’s 11:30 and the Club is Jumpin Jumpin

“So, I see nothing’s changed.”

Uncle Ken observed as we settled into our little section at SKYY by the window. There were two couches that looked like they could seat four or five people on either side of each other. A small table sat in the middle that looked like it could only hold just enough for a couple of drinks and a tray of appetizers. The dance floor was packed, and the DJ was keeping it live as he mixed in and out of the hottest songs on the radio. It was PURE FRIDAY which meant everyone got in free all night. Uncle Ken cursed as a girl that walked by that looked like she was wearing no less than a pair of underwear.

“Damn baby! I know it’s hot in here, but...”

He looked at me.

“Do they dress like that at your club?”

Tasha looked at me in interest as if to ask you have a club.

“Ah guess ah’m just use to seeing it."

We’ve worn some pretty risqué stage outfits ourselves. 

"But ah try to enforce a reasonable dress code at Tru Blue. It is a teen club. But ah just think it's just different now than it was."

Tasha nodded.

“I think I heard some of the other Haven kids talking about it. I just didn’t know it was your club.”

Shereece cut in.

“I was thinking that when we pick the cast of the biopic series part of the boot camp should be to have them see what it’s like to actually perform together on a *real* stage.”

Ah, could see where she was going and ah nodded. 

"That would be great publicity for the club. Then it'll be used in some of the scenes as well."

Because that's where Delta and I spent a lot of time.

“Maybe we could also introduce the cast there for a special for Ebony Entertainment Television.”

Shereece nodded her approval. 

“So, I guess I’m gonna have to wait until audition day to be announced whose gonna be playing me.”

Kenneth said bobbing his head to a popular, rap, song. Reece leaned back and crossed her legs.

“As a matter of fact, I was on the phone with him some days ago.”

Uncle Ken gave her a look like AND.

“I *might* be tempted to tell you if I wasn’t so thirsty.”

He shook his head and grinned.

“I can take a hint. What we sipping?”

Reece got champagne. Tasha and I got Strawberry Daiquiris. Ah didn’t want her to feel like she was the only one not drinking so ah got a virgin one. Besides on occasions, I have had alcohol, but drinking is something that when ah’m out a club ah can take or leave. Even though Reece was looking at me with her eyes raised like “You aren’t gonna drink.” Honestly, she probably shouldn’t be drinking herself and she had an event tomorrow. Uncle Ken said he’d have a Long, Island, Ice Tea and he’d bring back some wings. Reece was playing on her phone.

“God I hope nothing jumps off in here tonight! It says that Birmingham was trying to shut this place down due to recent violence. It says two men were injured in a shooting near here. It says police closed down the club that night due to a fight that security wasn’t able to control. Something about an altercation at the end of a high school graduation party that they had here.”

“Sometimes things happen that you don’t have any control over when you own a club. Even if you have tight security and have everyone checked, fights can still happen.”

Ah thought about the mess m’ah own club had been in after a recent celebration of a legendary RNB star had passed.   
“  
That’s why I stay prepared.”

She mumbled. Tasha made this face like OH ISH. So it’s like that. Reece gave her a brief nod to clarify.

“We’ve had to deal with our share of psychos over the years working with Starlight Music. If you thought being signed to a music company just meant going into the studio and recording, doing a video, taking pictures for magazine shoots, and looking pretty in front of the cameras you’d be wrong. Our first performance when we got signed to Starlight Music was for a funeral for one of the Holograms because a psychopath gunned her down in a mall.”

Oh, GOD. Ah hadn’t thought about that in a long time. My mind flashed back. Ah saw the church. Ah saw Jem and the Holograms in the front row. Ah saw other various faces from Starlight Music. Ah saw the stage and the pulpit. Then I saw the lilac casket sitting off to the right decorated with purple and white flowers. At that moment, it all came back to me how truly scared ah was. Ah, ’m not even sure how m’ah feet were able to carry me all the way to the stage. 

“Hello. M’ah name is Lucinda, and this is Shereece and Carmen. We’re new to Starlight. Ah regret to say that we didn’t get a chance to know her, but we were all big fans of her work. So we’re here to pay tribute to her with a special song that Cara and I wrote in her memory.” Then we begin to sing.  
Reece looked Tasha over thoughtfully.

“Maybe I should *prepare* you too.”

Ah looked at my cousin in shock.

“She’s just 13.”

“Pycho’s don’t give a .. don’t care about age! Why do you think it's been so many kidnappings here and people disappearing? And I didn't say I was gonna get her a piece, but there should be some kind of tech she can use to defend herself if she has to if she's thinking about sticking around here."

She snapped in defiance. 

“I’ve held a gun before. I had a gun.”

Tasha said quietly. Now it was my turn to look at *her* in disbelief. For what reason would she possibly need a gun at Haven House? Ah, ’d meet some of the people there when we’d performed at the yearly Halloween benefit concert. They were the nicest people. Tasha looked like she’d read my mind.  
“  
Not at Haven. I don't have it *there*."

She looked like she was about to say more then clammed up and looked out the window. Did she *still* have this gun? What did Reece really know about this girl? She seemed sweet, but as ah looked at her, there was something that seemed kind of hidden about her. Like she had this whole other side no one knew about. But ah really didn’t have time to think about because ah heard.

“Well, it looks like we have some celebrities in the building!”

Reece rolled her eyes and mumbled.

“Here we go!”

“We have REECE and CINNAMON from EYE CANDY in the house tonight”

Then one of our older hits started to play.   
ALL YOU LADIES LEAVE YOUR MAN AT HOME.  
THE CLUB IS FULL OF BALLERS AND THEY’RE POCKETS FULL GROWN  
AND ALL YOU FELLAHS LEAVE YOUR GIRL WITH HER FRIENDS.  
ITS ELEVEN THIRTY AND THE CLUB IS JUMPIN JUMPIN

“Come on!”

Ah laughed and pulled Tasha up by one hand and my cousin up by the other. The mood had gotten a lil too heavy. With everything that had gone on these last couple of months, ah just felt like letting all that go for one evening and just dancing like Delta and ah use to do way back when at the Attic. A space cleared for us as the crowd parted when they saw us step onto the dance floor. Tasha fell in perfect step with us like she was one of the group. Behind us, a screen with the video played. 

The video started out with shots of Reece getting out of her guy’s bed and getting dressed *while he fussed about where she was going*. Then a shot of Caryn walking past her man in a long coat, (with a sexy outfit underneath) on the couch, watching sports on TV. She then gets in the car and loses the coat. Then shots of myself making call after call to m’ah own guy and after getting no response back, turning the phone off, getting dressed, and leaving myself. We all meet up at the club, walk in together, and performed the song at the Galaxy (a nod and a tribute to where we first got our start).

SEXY WOMEN DO YOUR DANCE. FLY LADIES WORK YOUR MAN, ALL THEM FEELLAHS TIME TO CLOWN, WE CAN GET DOWN NOW  
BOUNCE WITH ME, BOUNCE, BOUNCE, BOUNCE, TWIRK, IT, TWERK IT. SHAKE BABY SHAKE SHA SHAKE SHA SHAKE WORK IT WORK IT TWIST BABY TWIST TWIST TWIST YOU BETTER DIP THAT THANG  
BOUNCE WITH ME, BOUNCE, BOUNCE, BOUNCE, BOUNCE, TWIRK IT, TWIRK IT, SHAKE BABY SHAKE SHA SHAKE SHA SHAKE WORK IT WORK IT. TWIST BABY TWIST TWIST YOU BETTER DIP THAT THANG

Then the DJ mixed into Reece’s current song.

POP IT POP IT. POP IT. POT IT. POP IT POT IT POP IT POP IT. LADIES JUST SO YOU KNOW. DON’T LEAVE THE HOUSE WITH A LITTLE KISS WHEN YOUR MAN GOT A BIG EGO. FRONTIN ON THE CAKE, NO PLAY LIKE I I I I GOTS TO GO (I saw Shereece mouthing along to her lyrics). CUT IT OUT. GIVE YO MAN WHAT HE DREAM ABOUT. T-SHIRT AND SOME HEELS ON WHILE HE CHASE YOU ALL AROUND THE HOUSE. GET EM REAL BAD, DROP IT LOW, AND BRING IT BACK. OH HE AINT GOTTA ASK CAUSE I DO IT FOR MY MAN. WIND IT UP SLOW, PUT HIM ON THE FRONT ROW, TELL HIM WELCOME TO THE SHOW, YEAH I DO THAT FOR MY MAN. (HE WANT THAT HOT SUGAR) HE WANT A PIECE OF SOMETHING SWEET AT NIGHT. HE WANT THAT GOOD TO THE LAST DROP LIKE MINE. HE WANT THAT SUGAR. HE WANT THAT SUGAR. ILL BE HIS SWEET LITTLE MAMA ALL THE TIME. AND WE CAN DO IT NOW OR LATER THAT’S FINE. HE WANT THAT SUGAR. POP IT POP IT.

*This* is what it was supposed to be about, ah thought. We were having fun! Something that had long since gotten lost between me, Cara, and Reece with all the other stuff we’d been through. It reminded me of the earlier days we’d first got signed. Back then it was all about the fans, and the energy, and just going out on the stage and letting the music take over. The only thing missing was Caryn. Ah had to laugh when Uncle Ken joined us on the floor and started to twerk on the line POP IT POP IT! But then the DJ switched up the song again.

I TELL YOU WHY THERES NO LOVE. SIMPLY YOUR NOT COOL ENOUGH FOR WHAT WE HAD BETWEEN US. DON’T YOU LOST MY TRUST. PEOPLE ASK ME WHERE YOU’VE BEEN. AND I TELL THEM WE’RE JUST FRIENDS. CAUSE IT’S SO OBVIOUS ITS NEVER GONNA WORK FOR US. OH NO OH NO NO. PLAYED WITH MY EMOTIONS. YOULL GET NO DEVOTION. YOU GETS NO LOVE. YOU CAN’T GET LOVE FROM ME. YOU CAN'T EVEN BE MY FRIEND AND YOU GETS NO LOVE AGAIN. WHATEVER YOU DO IT WILL COME BACK AND USE IT. YOU GETS NO LOVE.

Ah stopped dancing. How did they have that song? Ah hadn’t released NO LOVE. Ah, bet ah looked kinda crazy just standing in the middle of the dance floor with a confused look on m’ah face. Not that anyone seemed to be paying me any attention because people were now dancing themselves again, and they seemed to like the song. Ah, don’t really know how long ah was standing there before someone grabbed my arm and was pulling me off the dance floor. Ah heard m’ah cousin hiss in m’ah ear.

“Walk with me!”

Ah, guess the fun was over. She would know immediately it wasn’t a song we’d recorded together as Eye Candy. Although, she herself hadn’t recorded HOT SUGAH with us. Not only had she not recorded the song with us, but she’d recorded a whole ALBUM without me and Caryn. But somehow ah didn’t think that was gonna be a good enough justification. As ah let her lead me to the bathroom, ah tried to think of what excuse ah could give. She walked in, glared at some girls, (who just gave her a look like I don’t care who the hell you are. Then seemed to take their time that much more). Seeing that they were *not* gonna bow down to her, she led me back outside the club where we could speak in private.

“Ah can explain.”

Ah said at the same time she said.

“I don’t have a good feeling.”

“What?”

“Something’s not right.”

“What’s wrong?”

She just stared down the street and didn’t speak.

“Something’s not right.”

She repeated with a faraway look. I came over to her and put my hand on her arm.

“Hey. You know what it is?”

She looked at curiously.

“Ah bet it was just the people. It was starting to get a little crowded in there.”

Ah knew what a lot of people didn’t know about my cousin. She doesn’t like to feel closed in. 

“Yeah. That’s probably it. I just need a minute.”

She leaned against the building. Someone came up to us. A guy about 18 with two of his friends.

“Wow! I heard yal were here tonight but I didn’t believe it! Can I take a picture with both of you? Please it’s my birthday.”

I looked at Shereece. But she seemed to snap out of it (just that quick). Ah knew she'd be cool with it. She never turned down a fan no matter what kind of mood she was in.

"Sure!"

Ah smiled.   
“  
So what’s your name?”

She asked as she walked over to the guy. Ah knew she wouldn’t let down a fan. She might act all cool, but ah knew our fans meant everything to her. 

“Terrance.”

“Terrance. Well, I guess since it is your birthday and you are *kinda* cute!"

She flirted. Terrance blushed.

You wouldn’t be lying to us now, would you? How old are you Terrance?”

I got on one side of the guy and she got on the other while one of his friends snapped the shoot with their camera phone. We took a couple more. The guy looked like hed’ done and gone to heaven. Particularly, on one photo were Reece had brushed up on his side and wrapped her arms around him. I shook my head. She could be so extra. But the guy didn't seem to have any complaints! He had a Big ol goofy grin all over his face. And that’s the main reason ah wantedA her to see that we *shouldn’t* break up Eye Candy. We probably made that guys night, I watched him as he walked away thanking us over and over again. Ah was thinking of all the people we’d touched. All the hugs, and handshakes and encouragement we’d given when we spoke at different functions and schools. Ah didn’t understand why she’d want to throw that all away, but then ah quickly thought back to where we were presently and sighed. Ah knew it would probably never be that way quite the same again.

“I saw him again.”

She said quietly as she started to walk away from the club and down the street as to not be interrupted again. It took me a minute to think about what *him* she meant, but then she confirmed it because she then said.

“When I first got here. The first night back. I dreamt about him.”

Ah, think it was a little after our first year as a group when Sharayah had come to us about playing the Witches in her Allowan movie that I’d gotten a call that Shereece had blacked out at a table reading and had to be taken to the emergency room. Shortly after that, she’d confided in me that for some years after she finished high school, she’d been seeing a man in her dreams that she’d referred to as “Light Eyes”. Whenever she spoke of him, you could see this change come over her. Her tone would drop to almost a whisper. You could practically see the goosebumps that would appear all over her flesh. It’s as if she was terrified and freaked by just the thought of him. It freaked me out too because up until this point ah’d never seen my cousin like this. She was never scared of *anything* 

“It felt so real. It was almost like.”

Her body trembled a little and ah knew it didn’t have anything to do with that cold night or the lil red and gold mini-dress she wore with the dragon design on the front. 

“You haven’t had one of those in a long time.”

Ah said softly. We’d sat up some nights trying to figure out what triggered the dreams of the man in shadow with the only visible feature being his eyes. Ah, ’d hoped that meant they were going away. 

“Do you think maybe it’s not a dream? Maybe it’s a repressed memory.”

She looked thoughtful.  
“  
And there were a lot of people on the floor dancing. You said you didn’t feel right? Maybe one of the guys you saw had light, colored, eyes and reminded you of *him*.”

Ah dropped my voice. It had almost become a habit when we spoke of *him* to speak that way. 

“Can ah ask you a question?”

“You know I don’t have any secrets.”

“Was there some traumatic thing that happened to you when we were growing up”

“Nothing that you don’t already know and since when do you smoke?”

She looked at what ah was doing. As ah walked with her, ah’d taken a cigarette out of my pocket and a lighter and lite it.

“Old habit. Ah don’t really need it, but ah haven’t been right for the last couple days.”

Shereece wrinkled her nose as if to say those things are disgusting. I don’t see how you can smoke those.

“These are flavored. They taste like Vanilla.”

Ah explained. They were a specialty brand. They cost a little more, but ah needed a fix. M’ah husband had put me on to these when ah was in high school (that and other stuff). When ah joined the group ah’d given up smoking cold because it just didn’t fit the image of a Starlight Artist. Starlight Music was a clean-cut, family-oriented, label. Plus we had so much attention on us as new artists. It just wouldn't do to have me photographed somewhere smoking anything! Not when I was supposed to be *the good girl Eye Candy*. Honestly, ah guess ah still could and it turn into a big media scandal, but tonight ah didn't really care. Ah needed a break! But in the past months, I’d picked the habit back up to take the edge off. I passed the box to her and said.

“Try one.”

She shrugged and picked out a stick. I light it for her, and she inhaled. Then blew out a vanilla, scented, cloud of smoke.

“I didn’t just come here for my mom’s fashion show.”

She sighed heavily.

“It's funny that you asked did I have anything traumatic happen to me in my past. I don’t know Cin. It’s like sometimes I feel like there are holes and spaces where I can get an image, and then it’s just gone! Do you remember when we shot the Allowan movie and blacked out and ended up in the hospital?”

“Yeah. You really scared us.”

“There were a couple of other times after that.”

“What? When.”

I stared at her. She took a puff, inhaled, and exhaled.

“The Ring the Alarm video. Right after we wrapped, I think that was the first time. I was driving back to the complex. I think you had an interview scheduled and Caryn had a commercial shoot. Anyway, all I remember was leaving the shoot and then being back at our complex, but I don’t remember how I got there.”

“And you didn’t tell us. You could have died!”

“I know. It freaked me out too. I guess I’d driven to the complex by that time back and forth so much my body just knew the way consciously.”

“And the other time?”

“The Round Table meeting. Remember I didn’t come. I gave yal some excuse like I had another commitment. The day before that, I’d meet with a friend for lunch, and it happened again. I came home. Dad and I talked and he convinced me to check myself into a hospital to have test run. Brain scans. Caryn would stay with me then he came out a couple of days later. I told him he didn’t have to, but well you know how he is. That night I was still in the hospital having test run. He didn’t tell me at the time that my mom’s side had a history of mental disorders. But he insisted they not release me until every kind of test he could think of had been done."

“Did they find anything?”

“Not then and I thought that was the end of it. They said it was just stress and exhaustion. They told me not to go back to work for a week. I dismissed it like I’m fine. But then after New Zeeland, it got worse. The explosion didn’t help. When I finally came to, I didn’t even remember what happened. The dreams were back, and to make it worse now I was having headaches like you wouldn’t believe. I thought I was losing my damn mind. They told me it was a concussion and to take it easy. I was even seeing a therapist about the dreams. Well, I *thought* I was. Even though that seems hazy too. Sometimes I don’t even know what’s real and what I dreamt. I asked him about the therapist and he acted like he didn’t know what I was talking about. I don't know Cin. Maybe I am crazy!"

“That *is* strange. But ah don't think that. Ah, think there has to be a reason."

“I didn’t tell her, but while she was in school Dad and I went to UAB and had a friend of his run more test. They showed us the X-Rays.”

Ah, knew this wasn’t gonna be good. I held my breath. 

“The X-Rays showed that I. Here! This is an app. It's a new technology. It shows what's going on the inside of your body. The doctors showed it to me."

Then she reached down her dress and pulled out her phone. She passed it to me. Ah gasped as I took in the image in front of me. Clear as day, I could see the medium, sized, cluster.

“But this is.”

She nodded.

“But how did...”  
“  
From what I’ve read there aren’t any known causes but they said possible causes could be exposure to chemicals or radiation, family history, or cancer in any other part of the body. My best guess is like I said family history. I’ve been meaning to pay Mom’s side a visit, but since they’ll be here I was hoping I’d get a chance to sit down and talk to my aunt. It’s strange, in the back of mind I remember something a long, box, a chamber…”

“What was it?”

“I don’t..”

It looked like she was trying to concentrate hard. She stopped at the end of the block.

“I can’t. I can’t remember.”

Then she cursed in anger. Then I heard her sniffle slightly.

"I hate feeling like this. I hate feeling so helpless."

“Ah am so sorry!"

Ah came over to her and wrapped m'ah arms around her. Ah felt tears spring to m'ah own eyes. 

" Ah didn’t know you’d been going through this all this time. You didn’t tell us. Ah, mean, ah know about the blackouts. Ah knew about the dreams. Ah knew you'd been in the hospital. But ah didn't know about all the different times you'd gone and all the test."

“I wasn’t trying to keep it from you Cin. I swear. Half the time it just felt like I was losing it. I knew *something* wasn’t right, but then at the same time, I was trying to convince myself I was *fine* and that I wasn’t crazy. And then I just always felt like I had to be the *strong one*.”

“Does Uncle Ken know?”

“He’s gonna be PISSED! Then he'll probably sue the different hospitals I went to for not detecting it earlier.I thought I’d let him get past his wife’s anniversary before I hit him up with his daughter might be dying.”

“You can’t .. think like that ok. Uncle Ken is the smartest man ah know. Just like he found someone to find the cause, he’ll find someone to treat it. He’ll get you the best medicines, and procedures, and therapy. My mom isn’t gonna die and you aren’t either!”

Ah said angrily and smashed my stick forcefully with the heel of my shoe. Shereece just sighed.

“You must think I’m the biggest ass! First, I break up the group, then I drop this on you when your mother and your husband have been going through hell.”

“Ah don’t think you’re an ass. Ah, ’m just happy you told me. You know ah’m stronger than you think ah am. Ah, won’t break. Ah, ’ve been around my big cousin too long. She’s taught me to be tough. 

She told me she don’t tolerate weak people in her circle.”

Shereece gave me a half-smile.

“True!”

“And if you need to be here for you *and* Caryn. All you have to do is say the word. It’s just an hour's drive. Ah, ’ll drop everything and be right here in the Ham before you know it.”

“Thanks, Cin. I really appreciate that. I was thinking of sticking around here for a little bit myself. Ever since we’ve started the group I’ve just been going and going from one thing to the next. I think its taking *this* to make me realize, that I need to slow down a minute.”

“Please don’t do that again! Don’t EVER feel like you can’t tell me something or that you have to be strong by yourself! You know you don’t have to do that. Ah, ’m really starting to see why we need this break.”  
“Yeah.”  
“But you know we’ll have to tell Jerrica. She texted me about coming into the office and resigning the paperwork. Our contract ended right after we got back from the wedding.”

Ah reminded her.

“I know. I invited her and Kimber to the show tomorrow. I don’t know if either of them will come, but I was going to tell her or both afterward. Well, I guess we’d better get back in. They’re probably looking for us and I need to make sure that Tasha’s fingers haven’t gotten sticky being around this many people. Tho her *Prince Charming* would probably just whip out his wallet and offer to pay them for whatever she saw of there’s she had her eye on.”

“Are you gonna tell her?”

“Eventually I..”

“Shereece.”

Someone called and we both turned. There stood a tall, attractive, man in a very, nice, designer, cut suit. On closer look, ah saw a face ah hadn’t seen in many years.

“Treal.”

“Cinda?”

He came over to us and practically had to kneel down to give us a hug.

“I didn’t know yal would be out here tonight.”

“What are you doing out here?”

Shereece asked.

“Short break between games before the season wraps. We play the Cavaliers next so I thought before we head to Cleveland, I’d swing through and say hey to Mom. Are yal here by yourself?”  
Did he mean was it just me and her or by ourselves as in were we here with fellahs? Reece answered for me.

“We’re here with my Dad and uh protegee?”

“Wait! Right there! Just one second.”

He took off running in the opposite direction. Ah looked at Reece but she just shrugged. I teased her.

“He still looks good.”

“I guess. I mean he looks the same.”

“Remind me why did you break up with that one again?”

She rolled her eyes.

“Why do you assume it was *me*?”

Ah snorted. Why did I assume it was her? Cause uh it usually was. 

“See, it wasn’t even like that. We just decided *mutually* with us touring and him playing for the team it would just be too hard to keep up a long, distance, relationship. Neither of us wanted to tie the other one down so. It was just one of those things that just wasn’t meant to be.”

She sighed.

“But do you still have feelings for him?”

Ah taunted. She got quiet and didn’t answer me.

“You *do* still like him. OOOH.”

Ah said like when we were kids. She flushed a little.  
“  
I don’t know. Maybe.”

"Yal were so cute together!”

“All I know is that. It’s been 6 months. If I have to go another month, I think I'm gonna explode. You and that sister of mine totally screwed me over at the wedding when I was about to get it with that bartender.”

“Are you *really* still thinking about that?”

Ah laughed.

“Come on! You can walk back inside right now and leave with any fellah in the whole club, and your thinking about a bartender you meet in Orlando. Then I’m sure TREAL won’t mind giving you some tonight.”

I sing sang. 

“But who said I was interested in hooking up with Treal tonight?”

She crossed her arms.

“I’ll tell Uncle Ken and Tasha you won’t be coming home with us tonight.”

Just that quick, (and not even out of breath) Treal ran back up to us. He swung two flowers from behind his back. He gave Shereece a red rose and me a pink rose. 

“That was nice!”

Shereece said. Yeah, she was still feeling him.

“Thank you Treal.”

Ah said sweetly.

“Fa sho! You both look gorgeous tonight!!”

“You don’t look so bad yourself.”

“I really like both your dresses!”

“Thank you!”

Ah said. My outfit was actually from our line. It wasn’t per se a dress, but rather a net shirt with an Eye Candy emblem worn over a black, leather, bodysuit. If I was on stage that would be the outfit, but I’d worn it with a short, leather, skirt and thigh, high, black boots.

'Let’s go back in. I can’t have yal getting cold out here.”

My eyes had locked on something on the other side of the street. Treal and Shereece were heading toward the entrance and the line of people.

“Cin? You coming?”

“I’ll be in (in) a minute. I’m gonna have another smoke.”

Ah lied. Then waited until they were inside before I started taking deliberate strides across the street. Ah, can’t believe he’d actually have me followed I thought as I reached the Midnight Black Land Rover parked by the curb. I snatched open the door on the passenger’s side and got in.

“Bricks!”

Ah greeted to the heavy-set, man, on the other side with the scar on his face.

“Damn and I thought I was being inconspicuous. How are you LuCinda?”

Ah, sank back into the leather interior.

“I’m TIRED!”

“I’ve heard and I’m sorry for this.”

He reached into the glove compartment and handed me a set of papers.

“So, he couldn’t even face me himself hunh?

I muttered. I scanned through the papers. They basically said I was under contract that any material recorded at Lightning Bolt Records was their property and not only that I was obligated to record an album with them. Yeah, we’d see about that. I folded the papers up angrily. He could have NO LOVE, but ah’d be damn if he was sticking me to an album deal. Bricks just sighed.

“I’m sorry.”

He apologized.

“Did you know about this?”

“None of us did. I was just as shocked as anyone else. But it’s not *all* bad. I still get to record music. Before *Rick* came, all I ever was (was) the Misfit’s bouncer. He took a chance and listened to my demo. I mean who would have thought a 250 LB, black guy, could get a recording contract to do hard rock and metal but here I am.”

“He lied to us! You know all the work we did for that album for his sick *son* is probably either going in his own pocket or being divided with Misfit’s Music.”

“Yeah, I know.”

He said, and we just sat there and let a heavy silence fall between us.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While preparing to go to the club, Tasha reminisces about the past and her first time going to a club with a special friend. But the tragic event that followed continue to haunt her. Particularly when a ghost from the past shows up and rocks the security she thinks she's found in Birmingham Alabama. She then meets an unexpected ally and they bond instantly through both having escaped similarly bad situations. "REACT" is by the Pussy Cat Dolls.

Tasha

Who Is She Anyway?

“So, what can we do?”

Shereece said studying me intently on the bed, while Cinda rummaged through the clothes I had in bags and the ones in Reece’s closet going back and forth. Then she motioned for me to come over to her vanity to have a seat so she could start working on my hair and makeup. 

“She already looks older because of her height. Don’t go overboard and have her looking like she’s 40.”

Shereece snorted.

“I think I know what I’m doing.”

“Ah’m just saying you have a tendency to be kinda extra sometimes.”

She held up a long-sleeved top (kind of sheer) that slid off the shoulders. Shereece shook her head.

“Too plain. And I’m extra because they expect *Reece* to be extra! That’s how she is. Chill! I’m not gonna go crazy. I’m just gonna do enough so she’ll pass.”

“Have you ever been to a club before?”

Cinda asked me. She held up a black and red sequined jersey mini dress with HUSTLER on the front. Shereece made a face like the dress was cute, but she wasn’t sold it was the right dress.  
“  
Yeah. I’ve been to a club before.”

My mind flashed back. I had to be about 11 years old. When I said I didn’t hang out with that many females I wasn’t lying, but there was this one girl in my apartment building. She had to be about 16. Her name was Tasha. I thought she was particularly cool. She was tall, slender, and had long, dark, hair. (And it was hers too! I wanted hair like that) She always carried herself in this way that made her stand out, and she rocked the hottest outfits! She looked like she was mixed.

Secretly I use to watch her and wonder what it was like to be her. I’d already guessed from her varsity jacket that either she was a cheerleader, or she was dating the finest guy on the basketball or football team. I could tell she was popular, but she didn’t act stuck up like most of the girls I knew who were. Her apartment was on the floor below mine. When I saw her getting off the bus, she was always by herself. I always used to wonder when I saw her why. Until that day... I was outside late on the steps and I saw her come home late. Maybe practice had run late or she'd been with her man and they lost all track of time. Anyway, her Pops came outside causing a scene, cursing, and ranting, and carrying on like he’d lost his mind. The man was LOUD!

I swore he woke up the whole complex. Lights started coming on. I think someone even called security on his butt to get him to calm down/ No telling what he would have done if they hadn't shown up. She had seen me and kind of gave me this look like “Please don’t tell anyone.” But like who was I even gonna tell? The first night she actually spoke to me was another night I was again just sitting on the steps. Dave and Connie were both working the night shift so I was able to get my high in peace. That’s when she came up the stairs, sat next to me, and asked if I minded sharing. 

She asked my name and then we just passed a blunt back and forth. No other words needed to be said. That was how our first “stoop dates” were. We’d just lay back on the steps, get high, and look out at the night. At first, I didn’t notice the purple bruises, on her arm because she’d wear a jacket. But then, I guess she got comfortable enough with me that she didn’t bother to hide the marks. And even though I hadn’t asked, she started to share stuff with me. I’d just listen as she told me about how ever since her Mom had died and her Dad got fired from his job, he’d started drinking more and more. I listened to her tell me how much she hated her life and she just wanted OUT! 

I think she thought I was her age since she didn’t ask and I didn’t bother telling her. I was honestly glad she choose *me* out of anyone at her school or in the building to confide in. I felt special! One day, she was particularly riled up and venting about him again. Out of the blue, she asked me 

“Do you want to hit up a club tonight?”

Of course, I wanted to, but I was scared that if I told her how old I was she would drop me real quick. I asked her did she have any friends, and she told me that her *friends* basically were fake. The only reason they hung with her because it made them look good because of *her* social status. She told me in the short time she knew me she felt closer to me than any one of these so-called *friends*. They didn’t even know where she lived or anything about her real life. This just made me want to not lose her friendship that much more. I remember her introducing me to her Dad, and telling him I was her new friend and she was gonna sleep over my place that night.

He gave me the creeps. He kept looking me over like *he* wished he was the one sleeping over that night. UH NO! He was 30’s and he REEKED! I mighta smoked, but I think by the wild, ass, look in his eyes he was doing something a *lil* more than that. When she stepped out of the bathroom, she had on this slinky, sexy, sequined, black, mini dress with a split up the side and wrap-around heels. She’d twirled around and asked what I thought. I thought she was the hottest thing I’d ever seen, but I think I just said you look good. I didn’t want her to get the *wrong* idea, that I was into her or something. Just like Cinda and Shereece were doing right now, she’d pulled me into the bathroom and started working on my hair and makeup. She’d even given me a sexy, animal print, mini dress to wear. 

We did our normal *routine* and then at 10:30 we planned to head out to this hot, new, club called KISSES. We’d heard there were gonna be some famous RNB singers coming through, and maybe we wouldn’t be coming back to the apartment that night. Yeah, I know it was the *wrong* way to think, but couldn’t nobody tell me with my height and already developed body I wasn’t grown. Then I was always attracted to older guys anyway. When I meet my first real (well whatever he was) Khalil at Haven House. I was 12 and he was 14. While we were in the apartment, she’d taken the keys to her Dad’s car, but when we got in and she tried to start it up the engine just turned over and over, but it wouldn’t start. Thinking back, I thought maybe this is a sign that we shouldn’t be going to this club tonight. Dave and Connie had always since I was little made me go to church and Sunday school. So, I knew that sometimes he’d send signs of the right thing to do. But my new friend really wanted us to go to the club that night, and that’s what it was gonna be if I had to make away. I was probably deep down just a little scared that if I didn't she might end up hurting herself, and I definitely didn't want that. I think we’d finally decided on taking a UBER (it was either that or riding the bus *and who wanted to show up at a club getting off a bus! LAME! *). That’s when *he* showed up. He offered to give us a ride. I never trusted him! He was a snake mofo, and I knew that from the jump. He claimed he was coming by because he needed to be “better brother”. All he was trying to get better at was scheming on ways to rip my bio’s off. Then they wondered why their stuff would come up missing. DUH!

That night he seemed like he was in a hurry to be somewhere. He dropped us off and told us he’d be back. Whatever! Like somebody would *really* miss him. We were having a good time drinking and dancing. We meet a couple of ballers that keep our cups full all night, but mostly we just ditched them and danced with each other. At first, the music was pumpin, loud, hard, and fast and she’d held my hand high as I danced around her on the floor. All eyes were on us as we sexy danced with each other. Then the music switched, and a slow song came on. The song was THERE GOES MY BABY by Usher. Maybe it was the adrenaline from the club, or maybe it was the high I still had or the alcohol, but I didn’t pull back when she took my hand and didn’t leave the floor. Through the haze in my head, I was thinking friends can dance together. Girls can dance together. It wasn’t like we were the only same-sex ones on the dance floor doing it. But then she leaned down and kissed me. I still remember how her breath tasted like the mint, alcoholic, drink she’d had. 

It was a quick kiss. Just a brush of the lips. No tongue or anything like that. I didn’t even get a chance to react before I heard gunshots ring out. Then there was chaos! People started screaming, and running, and shoving each other trying to get to the exit! Three men in masks that looked like President Obama's face had burst up in the club and were headed for the bar. My blood froze as one of em yelled to the lady at the bar to give him all the money. I knew *exactly* who was behind that mask. 

More shots fired! I had to get the hell out of there! I frantically tried to find her in the crowd, but I was being pushed in one direction whether I wanted to go that way or not. More shots rang out! I was never so happy in my life to get out of that club. Cop cars pulled up, doors slammed, men in uniforms rushed inside. Ambulances loud sirens could be heard blocks away before pulling up the club, while paramedics rushed inside to check out the situation. I stood there cold and shivering on the curb not sure what to do next. I didn’t have that much money on me. If I called either my Mom or Dad, I’d have my ass handed to me for making them have to get off to pick me up and lose money. And so, I waited for her to come out. Plus, in all the chaos, I must have dropped my purse and my keys to my apartment were in there. So, I couldn’t go back home. Yeah, I *definitely* should have taken the warning! I thought she’d probably gotten out and headed back for the apartment so I just started to walk. I ended up walking to an all-night Waffle House.  


All I wanted to do was eat (I had the worse craving for chocolate, chip, waffles) and think about what I was gonna do to get back home. I always think better when I have something in my stomach. But one of the guys came over to my table and started talking.

“Hey! Can I sit with you?”

I shrugged. I wasn’t in the mood for company but at the same time, I wasn’t not in the mood for it.

“So, what’s your name?”

Normally I would have given him a fake one, but tonight I just didn’t have the energy.

“Amaryllis.”

I mumbled I said using the one I preferred and instantly started in on my food. I intentionally didn’t ask his but he offered it anyway,

"I like that. That's a type of flower right?"

I nodded.

“I’m Khalil. Did you come here by yourself?”

What kind of question was that? Did he see anyone sitting here with me?

“Just me.”

“Ok, I’m not trying to be all in your business but it’s kinda late. Where are you coming from?”

“I was with a friend. We went to a club, but something jumped off and we got separated.”

“That’s messed up! Are you ok?”

I actually glanced up at his face and couldn’t help noticing how fine the boy was. He had a slender, athletic, lean, body. His eyes were brown and he had deep-set, clean, waves in his hair. He had the prettiest skin I'd ever seen on a boy. But I didn't let on. I bet he was used to girls falling all over themselves to get with him.

“Not really. I lost my purse.”

He reached out and touched my arm gently. I looked down and saw a scratch. It must have gotten that way in the stampede.

"It's nothing! I must have gotten pushed."

I mumbled. Why in the world was I telling him all this? I went back to concentrating on my food.

“Ok. Well maybe your friend got it. Your purse. Maybe she went back for it and that’s why you couldn’t find her. At least I hope she did.”

He said. His gaze intent. I wish he’d stop staring at me like that. Cause if he thought I was just one of those girls that he could get in their head and go back to his place quick, he was SOO wrong@ My Daddy had warned me about guys that looked good on the outside and talked a lot of game but weren’t about shit else.

“Why are you out so late?”

“Actually, I was on my way back. Me and some of the rest of my boys had an out of town tournament. I play for Lakeside Middle.”

“What position?”

I asked. He looked slightly impressed I knew the difference, but I knew all about sports. My Dad and I used to watch games all the time together.

“I play center.”

So, he was the best player on the team. Centers were usually the team's strongest and tallest players.

“You should come see me .. us play sometimes.”

“I’ll think about it.”

I told him non=committedly. If he was the team’s strongest player that no doubt meant he had a girlfriend. I decided to test this theory out.

“Shouldn’t your girl be blowing up your phone by now?”

He just shook his head and smiled. 

“Nah.”  
Nah wasn’t a yes I have a girl or a no I don’t have one. Nah was a let me see how far I can get with this one without saying too much. He wasn't fooling me! I knew he did without him admitting it to me. Ok, he was looking a lil too hard right now! Time to get out of here! (And go *where* I didn’t know) But it was best to leave before he asked for my number. Then I would have to make one up because while I did have a cell phone the bios were holding it because I’d gotten into another fight at school. And this time they probably knew I’d find it so it was probably on one of them. Plus, I’d finished eating so there really was no reason to stick around.

“Well, I gotta go.”

I tried to stand up, but he said.

“But if you lost your purse how are you gonna get back in?”

“I’ll think of something. “

“You should come with me back to my place.”

I made a noise like typical. You just wanna get me in bed. I rolled my eyes.

"I gotta go. Bye!"

“No. Not like that. I stay at this place called Haven House.”

“What’s Haven House?”

“It's like a shelter for kids so they don’t have to spend the night on the streets. It’s just temporary. But they don’t ask questions.”

“Why do you have to stay there? Are you homeless?"

He shifted.

“No. My Dad runs with a bad crowd. They’re overall times of the night. If I go back home, he’ll probably send me back out and after the game, we played tonight I just wanna crash. Some of the guys were gonna drop me off there. You can come with me.”

I considered this. If this place really didn’t ask questions I could be in and out by the sun came up. Maybe Id even beat Connie and Dave home. They’d be pissed that I’d *locked myself out*, but even less than if I told them I’d went to a club that had gotten shot up. Then maybe once we got to this Haven House, if it had a phone I could call one of them and tell them *I was staying over a friend's house*. My eyes feel on the TV that was playing a special bulletin.

“I’m Amy Johnson coming to you live from the scene of a popular, over 21, club called KISSES, where a shooting took place just hours ago, that left several people killed and injured. We have with us the owner of KISSES, Mr. Michael Spivey to tell us more about the incident.”

No, she was ok! She *had* to be! On instinct, I reached for my cell phone and then thought. Oh yeah, that’s right. Then when I thought about it, I don’t even think we’d exchanged cell phone numbers. If I had my cell phone, maybe I could get her number off her social media page (if it was on there). I stood there for a minute, as a icy chill settled all over my body. I kept saying in my head, she made it out! She made it out!

“Hey! I’m sure your friends ok. Do you need my phone?”

He reached in his pocket and offered me his. It would have looked dumb to say I don’t know her number. So instead I said.

“How far away is this place?”

Luckily it wasn’t far. I was so ready to get out that car! If he wasn’t with me, the other two would have probably tried to take me back to their places. They suggested it, but he wasn't hearing that. He quickly let them know that the only place they were taking *us* was to Haven House. It was SEXY AS HELL! Haven House wasn’t what I expected. First of all, it was small.

“Yeah I know it’s not that big but it's usually less crowded on the weekends. There’s a basement. We can go down there.”

So, we did. Even though it was late there were still some of the other kids up watching movies. A lot of em spoke to Khalil as we passed by the different rooms. Everybody seemed to know and like him. True to his word he didn’t try anything. I stretched out on the sofa, and he didn’t even try to sit by me. He sat in an old, reclining, chair and flipped on the TV. It was just as old as the rest of the place.  
“Was there anything you wanted to watch? This TV doesn’t have that many channels. I think just the local ones. I think it has a channel with old sitcoms.”

“That’s fine.”

“Cool.”

"I know it's kind of drafty down here. You can have my jacket if you want it?"

"Ok."

He tossed it over to me and I caught it. Then I put it on and snuggled up in it (inhaling his scent). It smelled like Cool Water. My Daddy wore that cologne.

“So did yal win tonight?”

I asked after we’d watched a little bit of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Aire.

“Yeah 20-15. It was close. What school do you go to? Are you on anything?”

“Dance.”

I didn’t answer the question about my school. I wasn’t sure if I wanted him showing up there to watch me practice or something. I really didn’t need all that drama from the other girls on the dance squad over who he was to me. Because it really wasn’t any of their business. And then I didn’t want them to know about him because they’d no doubt try to get at him themselves if I did or didn’t let on we had something. Did not trust any of the females up there.

“So, can I watch you dance sometimes?”

I just shook my head and closed my eyes. The next thing I knew it was morning. I didn’t stick around for breakfast. I didn’t even say good-bye. When I left he was still knocked out in the chair. I did take one last look at him and think, it wouldn’t have worked out anyway. But strangely, I felt a little jealous of whatever girl was claiming him. It was nice that he’d kept his word and didn’t try to get some from me. Not that I would have given him any. He’d forget me anyway. As soon as he woke up and realized I was gone, I’d just be that girl he meet at the Waffle House. I debated whether I should give his jacket back. I was about to slip my arm out of one of the sleeves, and then I thought. Nah! It looked better on me. If he wanted it back, he could find me and get it. I found one of the other adults at Haven House upstairs, a lady with rainbow-colored hair. She’d introduced herself as Danse and offered to give me a ride back to my place.

But when we got there, I wanted to turn around and go straight back. An officer’s car was at the complex and I saw him standing outside the door talking to her Dad. I heard snatches of the conversation as I passed hoping he wouldn’t spot me.

“I’m sorry sir! There’s no easy way to say this, but there was an accident last night. We have reason to believe that your daughter was at the club and has gotten shot.”

OMG! I stood at the top of the stairs out of view and continued to listen.

“My daughter? What do you mean? My daughter wasn’t at no damn club last night. My daughters here in her room TRACEY! TRACEY!”

He yelled to the top of his lungs. My hopes shot up a little. Please let her come out! He hadn’t even remembered last night. He kept yelling her name.

“TRACEY! TRACEY! GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE! WHAT DO THEY MEAN YOU GOT SHOT? DID YOU GO TO THIS CLUB LAST NIGHT.”

“Sir!”

The officer sighed. I peeked over the rail and saw him hand her Dad something. 

“This was on her. We need you to come down to identify.”

I didn’t want to hear anymore. I knocked on the door to my own apartment. Made it inside. They were all there, I ignored Connie who was yelling at me 

“Where the hell have you been?”

I’d forgotten to call them. I ignored Dave who was yelling.

“Young lady have you been out all night at some boy's place?”

I ignored my snake, ass, Uncle who was just sitting there like he belonged there stuffing his stupid face with eggs and bacon. I wanted to run across the room and take the place he was eating with and crack it upside his skull when he said.

“Are you alright! I was so worried about you. I was out all night looking for you.”

Instead, I went to the bathroom and promptly threw up all over the bathroom floor. When I came back to the present, they were talking about something else. Shereece was saying.

“All I’m saying is one of em has been there for you for years and the other one hasn’t been nowhere to be found. I know Ro had his issues before, but I know he really cares about you.”

“Ah know he does.”

Cinda said softly.

“I’m not trying to tell you what to do, but I wish sometimes I could find someone like that (that) was willing to stick it out with me. I know I can be a lot to handle.”

“You just need to give people more of a chance. I know you have this thing with trust but you might be pushing away a really amazing guy. Ah think you should call Michael. You probably have the poor guy wondering what he did wrong. And he's really good-looking."

"It's the good-looking ones you have to watch out for."

She grumbled.

"They're players."

"Not all."

She held up a leather, halter, that laced up the front with ripped jeans in the other hand. I snorted. Yeah right, like I had the boobs for that. Shereece looked amused too.

“Did you forget who we’re going to the club with? If you *really* think he’ll let her out the house in that. I know he’s cool but he probably won’t let *me* out the house in that.”

Then how bout. She had up a dark, satin, top with straps that showed off a little of my stomach and paired it with matching satin pants and a long, red, jacket. I smiled at the outfit and wiggled a little.

“Do you like this one?”

She asked and I nodded.

“Girl be still before I mess up your face.”

Shereece fussed. I blurted out (cause it seemed a good a time as any).

“I passed the entrance exam!”

Cinda exclaimed.

“To Ramsey? CONGRATULATIONS! Ah didn’t know you were staying! We’ll all have to go out tomorrow and celebrate.”

I waited for Shareece’s reaction. She didn’t give one so I all-out said.

“I think we should. Then Monday we can fly back out to Haven House and get the rest of my stuff and I can start next week. Or we can just have them sent my stuff.”

Honestly, I really wasn’t attached to the things I had at Haven House. I had some outfits there in my closet, but I wouldn’t trip if I couldn’t get them back. Although I did have some cute outfits, but I could always get more clothes. I had a case that had a few glosses and polishes in it, sitting on my dresser I also had a jewelry box my Mom had given me a long time ago that played a song, I remembered she use to sing to me before I fell asleep when I had nightmares that calmed me down. But that was about it. The only other things I had were posters on the wall and a shelf with about 20 books on it that were some of my favorites and a few issues of the Gazer that I’d collected over the years. (Actually, I had every issue).

“You really think it’s that simple?”

Shereece sighed. Well, wasn’t it? I looked at her in confusion. I told her Martha didn’t give a rat’s ass if I stayed or left Haven House. All she had to do was have my records transferred from my old school, How long could that possibly take? Two weeks? Three? If she was as worried about my Mom and Dad, they hadn’t seen or heard a word from me in over a year. For all the knew, I was probably dead. 

“We’ll see.”

Was the only response she gave me. I sat back in the chair. This was *not* turning out the way I wanted AT ALL! At the club, they started to playback to back Eye Candy hits, and we all got up and turnt up on the dance floor. It was almost like I was the fourth member of the group. I could just picture Jerrica standing at the podium of Starlight Music.

“Ladies and gentlemen now the moment we’ve all been waiting for! After a brief hiatus, as we all know due to personal conflicts we lost one of our biggest, selling, acts. But it gives me great pleasure to bring them back today with a huge welcome! (A pop is heard and confetti and balloons rain down from the sky) I give you EYE CANDY. REECE, CINNAMON, CARAMEL, and the newest member TASHA OTHERWISE KNOWN AS RED HOT.”

I was so wrapped up in my little fantasy that I didn’t notice Shereece and Cinda slip off. When I looked for them, they were gone. Weird, but the club was by this time filling up quick. I danced a little more with a guy but I excused myself before he could ask for my number. I headed back to our section. All of a sudden, I wanted some of Paw Paw’s wings. He was there by himself already digging in. He smiled when he saw me.

“Have some!”

I plopped down next to him and joined him.

“Do you do this a lot?”

“Club? Not as much as I use to when I was in my 20s Course then I had a different motivation.”

“Women?”

“That’s right. But I grew out of it. Even before I got married I think I was getting there. I learned that what I was looking for I wasn’t gonna find in the club. I mean, but don’t get me wrong it’s cool. The bruhs and I still swing through from time to time if they have different events or nights. Mostly when I go it’s with them.”

“Do you take your girlfriend?”

“Sometimes. She loves to dance! Like you I think when she was younger she took modern dance, jazz, tap. Sometimes we go to WORK PLAY. It has different events or a something a little more laid back like I particularly like lounges. So you don’t have to yell like we’re doing.”

“Do you wish she was here?”

“Always! But I’m having a good time with my other favorite ladies! I'm here with the most beautiful women in this whole club. So I can't really complain. Oh, and you don’t have to feel obligated to hang out with me if you don’t want to. You can go dance with someone. I promise I not here to be breathing down your neck all night. If you see someone you wanna talk to. you can pretend I’m not here. I just don’t want anyone trying anything funny like slipping nothing in your drink. If someone offers you one just tell em you good and tell me and I’ll get you another one.”

“I'm good!"

Then I admitted. I bobbed my head to RIGHT BACK by KHALID.

“I like this! My Dad would have never done this.”

“Not much for the club scene, was he?”

I shook my head.

“This would have gotten on his nerves. He didn’t like loud noise.”

“It’s not for everyone. I guess I just like to try to keep a part of me twenty sum.”

“*This* doesn’t bother you.”

I said referring to the loudness and not only that some of the songs they were playing were the explicit versions.

“What X-rated lyrics? I mean. I can’t say I’m thrilled sitting here with my 13-year-old grand-daughter listening to someone rap about eating vagina like an ice-cream cone. But I can’t go up to the DJ and be like hey can you play the radio-friendly version. But personally, does it bother me? I don’t know. I’ve listened to explicit rap lyrics before. I’m not uncomfortable with it. They’ve been around since I was younger. I can tolerate the ones with the cursing, but I can take or leave the sexually explicit ones.”

“I don’t really like those either.”

I agreed.

“Paw-Paw. I wanna stay here with you.”

I said flat out. I waited for his reaction.

“And I’d *love* for you to stay here with me. You’ve become very special to me in the past few days.”

“Then why can’t we just go get my stuff after the show? I’ll be good. I’ll make good grades. I won’t get in any trouble. I’ll work. I won’t take anything or ask either of you for money.”

“You know I don’t care about that. But sweetheart if you want that your going to have to talk to your parents and tell them that’s what you want to do. We can’t just *take* you. We could get into a lot of trouble with them if we just.”

“But I haven’t seen them in over a year. It’s better for them if I come out here.”

Kenneth paused and looked at me. He sat his cup down slowly.

“You know I’d do anything in my power to help you, but you have to be honest with me. Did something happen to you back at Haven House? Did one of the men there try to hurt you or?”

“No. Not *them*. My uncle!”  
“  
Oh, I get it. Your uncle is the reason your at Haven House. You ran away to get away from *him*. And that’s who you were seeing when I woke you up wasn’t it?”

I nodded. 

“He had my friend killed. He didn’t know I know but I know it was him.”

I whispered.

“And your scared he’ll do the same to you.”

“I had him locked up but I think he’s gonna get out soon. He’s gonna come looking for me. I didn’t say my name but he’ll know who did it. Please Paw Paw. Don’t make me go back there. It’s not Haven House. They never did anything to me. If he finds me there he might hurt them too. He doesn't care who he hurts! I just...”

“I get it now.”

He said quietly. 

“Do you want me to be somewhere that’s not safe?”

“Of course, I don’t. Hey! I’m glad you told me. I *will* get you out. Ask my other daughter Cara, I don’t mind fighting. But we’re still going to have to have a conversation with your Mom and Dad. If you just explain it to them.”

“They won’t believe you! She won’t believe you! She’ll take his side! She’ll say I’m the one lying!

I was there when the police came and hauled his ass off ranting and screaming that he knew I had something to do with this and how he was gonna make me pay for this. Then he hissed as he was drug off.

“It should have been you.”

I knew what he meant and I let out a wild yell and tried to rush him. My Dad had to grab me and hold me back as I struggled to get free and possibly kill him right then and there in broad daylight. I could have done it. I had a knife on me. I wasn't thinking straight that they would have taken him to the morgue and handcuffed me in his place. I keep screaming.

“HE KILLED HER! HE KILLED HER! HE KILLED MY FRIEND!”

My mom had looked at me and yelled.

“WHAT DID YOU DO? WHAT DID YOU DO?”

Then I felt her rush me and her palm against my face. She jumped me and started trying to attack me. She fought and punched at me while trying to hold me down. I was trying to fight her right back. Until that is she grabbed me by the throat. Dad had to pull her off me because she had her hands around my throat and was trying to chock the life out of me. He touched my arm lightly.

“Hey. Look at me. We’ll figure something ok. I’m not gonna let anybody else touch either of you ever again.”

His eyes flashed in the pulsating lights of the club and he voice got dangerously low.

“He won’t come anywhere near you because if he does I will kill him my damn self. We'll sit down tonight, all of us, and figure something out."

“Excuse me!”

We both looked up and Paw Paw froze. I heard him say 

“Bianca.”

I could see his confusion. The lady standing in front of us bore such a strong resemblance to the lady I’d seen in the videos. It was eerie looking at her.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to interrupt. Are you two .. here together?”

I sized this lady up. Right off I could tell there was something kinda .. off about her. Did we look like we could remotely be here *with* each other? I gave her an odd look. She pretended not to notice.

“Uh no. We that’s my grand-daughter.”

“Aww isn’t that cute! I just wanted to ask if you wanted to dance.”

Paw-Paw hesitated. He started to turn her down.

“I’d like to but.”

He began. She pouted cutely.

“Please it’s my birthday. I came here alone.”

Yeah, right. You lying! She knew good and damn well it wasn't her birthday. She just wanted to get in Paw-Paw's pants! Don’t do it Paw- Paw. Tell her you're taken. I liked the other one better. He turned to me.

“You don’t mind, do you?”

“I’ll bring him right back.”

She said in a fake sweet tone. I just shook my head and slumped back in the seat and picked up my glass suddenly wishing it wasn’t a virgin drink.

“It’s fine.”

I mumbled. He turned to me.

“I’ll be right back. I’ll make sure I can see you from where I am. I’m *right here*.”

Then she lead him off. She smirked at me when she thought he wasn’t looking. BITCH! I thought. Enjoy the dance with him because he’s already taken. For a second, I just sat there and watched the crowd and sipped my Daquari. Since no one was around, I reached for Shereece's untouched champagne and sipped on that. No sense in it going to waste. Someone then comes and plops their fat behind down in my lap and murmurs in my ear.

“I thought that was you. You look HOT tonight!"

Halloween, and she’d clearly had one too many. 

"Thanks!"

“I didn’t see you at Top Golf.”

She pouted. She removed the flute from my hand and drowned the contents.

“Yeah. My bad I came home and went to sleep.”

“Make it up to me. Dance with me!”

“Dance with me.”

I heard Tracey’s voice whisper in my head. The song was still slow. But she wasn't Tracey. Nowhere close!

“I’m good!”

I mumbled wishing I could push her off my lap. If her dress rose up any higher, she’d have everything on display, and I could tell she didn’t have any underwear on under her short red dress that was cut out in the middle and up the sides. I guess she noticed I noticed and started to grind on me giving me a seductive lap dance. Yeah uh NO! 

“Then let’s do something else more fun. Let’s get out of here.”

She said in my ear. I looked around the club Paw Paw was still dancing with that lady. Then I spotted Shereece dancing with this guy I recognized from the NBA. I didn’t see Cinda anywhere. I took another sip of my drink and finished it. I shrugged.

“Yeah ok. Just let me tell them I’m about to leave.”

I stood up, just as a guy came over to us and said.

“There you are.”

He didn’t look happy. I left them to whatever drama that was all about. I started to walk away. Yeah, I think I’m tired of clubbing now. The DJ was on fire, but I didn’t feel like dancing anymore. There was no one here I *really* wanted to slow dance with. I wasn’t particularly hungry anymore after the 5 wings I’d ate, and the drink had filled me up. Not even my past *fun* appealed to me tonight. It kind of took the fun out of everything when you had someone offer to buy you the things you *borrowed*. I was starting to decide that clubs really weren’t all that! But then I saw someone that might make the night a little more interesting.

That guy at the bar with the pretty eyes was FINE! Maybe on his break, we could get into a little something. If he was lucky. Everyone else was hooking up. Why should I be the only one left out tonight? I got to the bar, and smiled at the guy.

“What’ll you have?”

"Maybe you."

I flirted as I pretended to study the menu. He kind of gave me a half-smirk half-smile. 

"Oh yeah."

He came a little closer to me and leaned down.

"What's your name love?"

I was feeling his little accent and I was about to kick some game back, but then something happened that suddenly made me feel lightheaded. I had to grab the bar to steady myself. I heard someone beside me laugh. I stopped in my tracks. SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! It wasn’t possible! How did he get out? How did he get here? Had he found out I was here and followed me? I made sure no-one knew I was at Haven House. I’d even used a fake name. I had to get out of here before he recognized me so I just turned and started to walk off.

“Hey did you want anything?”

"Chris" called to me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him pause in the conversation with the woman he was trying to hit on and look in my direction. KEEP WALKING! I told myself. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN! 

“Excuse me for a minute.”

I heard him say to the lady. SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! KEEP WALKING! I heard him saying 

"Hey! Hold up a minute! Don't I know you?"

This was it! It was going to be that night all over again. Tears welled up in my eyes. KEEP WALKING. The dance floor was full and I used it to my advantage and put people between me and him. I moved with purpose. I CAN MAKE IT TO THE EXIT! I CAN MAKE IT TO THE EXIT! Then I can get in Paw-Paw’s car. Id got his keys off him before he left to go dance with the lil Mrs. Pycho path. A little further. I can practically feel him closing in on me. 

A FEW MORE STEPS! I felt an arm reach out, and grab me and I thought its all over. But they pulled me through the club and said in my ear.

“This way.”

I felt myself being dragged me down a hallway. My heart was pounding with every step. Every single second I thought he was going to pop up in front of me with his gun pointed in my face and POW! The figure pulled me down a hidden hallway and finally out a door that led to the back of the club. When the door swung open, and the stuffiness of the club was replaced with cold my heartbeat slowed.

“Thank you.”

I said finally looking at the person for the first time and seeing that it was a girl about my age.

“I saw that guy following you. You looked like you could use some help. It’s ok. Your safe now.”

“I can’t make it to my grandpa’s car. He’ll see me.”

“There’s a park close by. I know a short cut. We can hide out there. You can use my phone to call your Grand-dad from there.”

I decided I trusted her more than I trusted him so I followed her silently. A few blocks later and we were at the park. Everything was still and quiet. She kept walking until she leads me to an area in the park.

“This is the Amphitheatre at Rail Road Park. We should be safe here.”

She passed me the phone. I called Paw Paw’s phone but it went to voice so I left him a message. I left one on Reece’s phone too. I guess all there was to do was wait.

“So, who was that guy?”

She asked.

“Someone bad.”

I told her.

“Someone who wants to hurt me.”

“You aren’t from here, are you?

She asked. I shook my head.

“Is he?”

I shook my head.

“Good. This is a big park and if he’s not from Birmingham even if he knows about it he probably won’t think to look for you here. He’s probably given up already and headed back to his place.”

“So, what are you doing sneaking around clubs so late?”

I took in her outfit of ripped jeans and a plaid shirt. Definitely didn’t look like club attire.

She sighed and slumped against one of the seats of the theatre.

“Actually, to be honest, I’m hiding out too. Something happened tonight, but I got away. I can’t go back home.”

“You can come with me. My Paw-Paw’s real cool. He kind of has a white-knight complex, but he’ll let you stay the night. He has a big house with lots of rooms.”

She smiled at me.

“So, what’s your name?”

“Kenzie. Yours?”

“Tasha.”

“So, what do you wanna do while we wait?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

I said tiredly. She pulled an IPAD out of her backpack.

“We can watch a movie. Damn!”

She cursed seeing that her tablet was dying and then fished through the bag.

“I left my charger in his car. So, I guess that’s out. Well, we can talk.”

“Ok.”

“So, you said your not from here? Where you from?”

“LA.”

“Ok. My Uncle is going to school out there to be a lawyer. Why you in Birmingham?”

“Research for a role I’m gonna audition for.”

“Oh wow! That’s cool. I wanna act too. I’m studying drama at the Performing Arts School here. What role are you going out for?”

I hesitated. She laughed a little.

“Don’t worry I’m not gonna try to steal it from you. I promise.”

“The Eye Candy biopic.”

“Are you SERIOUS?! That’s gonna be HOT! I haven’t even heard about it. Where’d you hear this? You must have connections.”

She asked curiously.

“Sorta. Shereece saw me at a mall back in LA, and she asked me personally to audition to be her.”

I said a little proudly. I left out the whole part about how I’d stolen her MP3 player.

“DAYUM! You are as good as in then. I can see you playing her tho. I think I meet her a long time ago, but I was younger. She used to date my uncle when they were in school here! But I’d love to audition for Cinnamon! She was always my favorite one!”

“Yeah? You should. She was at the club tonight. That’s who I was with. You should tell her.”

“You think I should?”

I nodded. It never hurt to get a jump on the competition and make a good impression before the other chicks did.

“I’ll introduce you to her when they come to get me. I mean I can’t tell you for sure *when* the auditions are because it’s still in the planning process. I don’t even think anything’s written yet. But if she sees you she’ll remember you when it’s time to audition and that’s a good thing. Can you sing?”

She smirked and started to sing a few lines of one of Eye Candy’s songs.

WHEN I GET MESSED UP AT THE PARTY  
I MAKE A SCENE AND GET UPSET  
BUT WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING  
YOU BRING ME BREAKFAST IN BED AND ACT LIKE THERES NOTHING TO FORGET  
MAYBE I SHOULD COUNT MY BLESSINGS  
THAT YOUR JUST THAT TYPE  
SO CALL ME MASOCHISTIC  
BUT SOMETIMES I WANNA FIGHT  
EVERY TIME I LEAVE U PULL ME CLOSER  
I HANG UP THE PHONE YOU CALL ME BACK  
WHY DON’T YOU MESS ME ROUND LIKE YOUR SUPPOSE TO?  
YOU'RE TURNING ME CRUEL CAUSE IM JUST WANTING YOU TO REACT.

“Do that answer your question?”

I nodded. OK! She was GOOD! 

“Not bad! You should do that for *her*.”

Cinda would definitely be impressed.

“So, you really think I have a chance hunh?”

“You never know unless you just do it! But yeah I think you do.”

“I’ve been singing for as long as I can remember. I grew up around it. My Mom has one of *the* most powerful voices in our choir. And my Uncle played around with it. He had a hit song on the radio some years back. I think if I got in front of all those people trying to audition, I’d lose it for real. Aren’t you scared?”

“I probably will be when the time comes.”

I admitted. 

“But I think we can do it. I think we’re gonna be the new Eye Candy.”

I could just feel it. It just seemed like finding her (well her finding me) was destiny. 

“I feel that!”

“If I get anything like an early script I can email you a copy.”

It was just my way of thanking her again for getting me out of there.

She leaned her head back against the seat. Something hit me all of sudden. I stared at her.

“What?”

She looked at me oddly.

“Do I have something on my face?”

“You’re the one everyone is looking for. I heard about it on the radio on the way to the club.”

“My Dad, I can’t stand his *ass*! I just want her to leave, or take him out! I wouldn’t be sorry. I know they’re worried but if I go back it’s gonna be more of the same. They’ll separate. She’ll kick him out. He’ll stay gone for some weeks. Then he’ll come back and promise he’ll get better. She’ll forgive him. Then the abuse will start all over again.”

“Where do you think he was trying to take you?”

“I don’t know. He picked me up at school and told me to get in the car. I would have tried to run but he grabbed my arm and forced me in the car. I guess he knew they’d look for us so he rented a room and then he told me we were gonna leave later to go on a trip. I waited for him to fall asleep, but he never did. He’s slick! Never went to the bathroom. He had to stop for gas tho, and when he went in to get it, I ran. I thought I’d lose him in SKYY because he’d never go in a club like that.”

“At least you got away!”

“Yeah, but now he’ll just go back after my Mom. He’ll think *she* was the one that got me, and I don’t even wanna think about what he’ll do when he comes back.”

We let the heaviness it in the air make us fall silent. Both of us emotionally drained.

“Can I tell you a secret?”

She asked with her eyes closed.

“Yeah.”

She passed me her backpack. It was heavy. I peeped inside.

“I took it out of his glove compartment.”

She didn’t need to finish the thought. If he came after her or put his hands on her mom again. 

“I need to close my eyes for a sec.”

She apologized.

“Me too!”

I murmured and I think we both fell asleep.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have been watching too much YOU. YOU is a series on Netflix about a guy who becomes fixated on several women in the show. After obsessively pursing them he ends up not only killing them but several people they're close to in his misguided love to "protect" them. Just like the shows main character Joe, Tyreke gets himself into a series of unpredicted and messy situations in his attempt to get an up-close and personal view of his birth mother. Will he get

Tyreke 

The Dark Knight

I had the badge, but now I needed the uniform the rest of the Skyy employees wore. My clothes didn’t exactly say “Grown and Sexy”. More like “Casual and Lazy”. I slid “Chris’s” watch off and then looked down at his unconscious body slumped over on the floor. I looked down at my own dark hoodie, shirt, and sweat pants and sighed. I never thought I’d be doing this but, I unzipped my jacket and took off my shirt. I stuffed them in the bag I always carried. 

Then I leaned over his body and started to unbutton his shirt until Id slid it off him and slipped it on me. It was a little big. “Chris” had more body than me. 7ft 250 lbs. I’m guessing he worked at a fitness center in the day and did this at night. Based on the watch, I’d say he was making a little more than a regular employee so I’d say manager.

Now came the *fun” part. I bent over the guy and removed his shoes, and started to slid his pants down his hips revealing Batman boxers. I tried not to make contact with more than I needed to. The pants were a bigger fit on me than I would have wanted, but luckily, I had on a belt. There was no way, I was gonna fit my feet in his shoes. Besides mine looked better.

Then I looked at him again. Cause a half-naked man lying in the middle of the room didn’t look off. I’d have to move the body. Skyy was too crowded to move him in or out of the club. Now what to do with you? If I put my own clothes on him, he might come to and come looking for me. Then I’d have to make a quick leave. Besides I really liked that hoodie! I looked around the room. It had storage spaces for the employee's stuff while they were on the floor. I went walked over to one of the lockers and jerked the lock. It held steady. I dug around in my bag and found what I was looking for. A few jiggles and CLICK! The door popped open.

Right away I could tell it was a female’s locker. There was a purse and a bunch of women’s junk (brushes, hair spray, lip gloss, pain pills). But stuffed in the back, I saw something hot pink. I pulled it out (causing some of the other stuff to spill out on the floor). I held it up. It was a vintage Jem and the Hologram’s tee-shirt. It would be a tight fit but.

I drug the guy over to the wall and sat him up and slipped the shirt over his head. I smirked. It was kind of a funny sight. But I couldn’t just leave him on the floor like that. There was a couch on the other side of the room, so I had to half-lift him by the arms and half drag him over to the couch. I pushed him on the couch and his body slumped over. That would work. If anyone came in they’d just think he was either really drunk or really tired.

I shut the door, turned off the lights, and slipped out. I made my way over to the bar. There was a pretty, dark-haired, lady behind the bar. “Emily” looked at me and frowned as she looked me over.

“Where’s Chris? He was supposed to be out here 30 minutes ago? And who are you?”

“I think he wasn’t feeling good. He mighta left. I just got here. My name is Chris. I’ve been in training all week. This is my first night on the floor.”

I said easily. Emily frowned. She was probably thinking no one told me about this.

“Did you need to call and check with Dan? Cause I can find him. I know he’s around here somewhere.”

“No, that’s ok.”

I was banking on she wouldn’t because the club was rapidly filling up, and she’d rather have me behind the bar with her than rooming around the club trying to find the owner.

“Have you ever worked at a bar before?”

Emily asked as she made herself busy serving the guy in front of her who’d requested a beer (and her number). I guess it answered her question when the next lady asked for a cosmopolitan and I said.

“One cosmopolitan coming up. Would there be anything else?”

I said stalling while I tried to on the sly Google Cosmopolitan on my phone. I’d heard of Cosmopolitans on that show Mom’s use to watch (Sex In the City). I had no idea what went in one. Before I could find the right glass, Emily had made the drink and slid it in front of the lady. She motioned me to the side when it got slow.

“There’s a cheat sheet under the bar. But you just take the orders for now and I’ll make the drinks.”

Then she looked at me sympathetically and said.

“Hey. I've been there. I know it seems like a lot, but you’ll get the hang of it.”

Some of the simpler orders I was allowed to make. The ones like wine, champagne, and beer that didn’t require to be mixed with anything. For a while, I lost track of time and just worked. That’s when *he* came up to the bar. I keep my face straight and asked.

“What can I get for you?”

Gramps I silently added.

“I’ll have champagne, two virgin strawberry Daiquiri, and a Long Island Ice, Tea. And let me get a 12-piece wing basket.”

“Coming right up.”

I told him the total and I bristled slightly as he handed me a gold card. I ran the card (making a mental note of the series of card numbers in my head) then handed the card back to him. Everything about him said privilege The outfit he had on looked like it could pay my athletic fees for a couple of semesters. Probably from that expensive men’s store Jos. A Bank in Brookwood Mall. If I didn’t resent him, I might have admired him. When I gave him the card, he looked at me a moment. Do I look familiar to you Grandpa? Well, I should. And why is that?

“I’m sorry. You just look familiar to me.”

Maybe you should ask your lying, ass, daughter why that is. I thought. We locked eyes for a quick second. Then I excused myself before I said something smart. 

“I’ ma gonna go and check on your wings.”

I kept trying to tell myself it’s not *his* fault. She probably lied to you just like she probably did everyone else. Had she even told *anyone* about me at all, or did she just take a test, see it was positive, hop her ass in the car and head straight to the clinic. It’s not *his* fault I repeated and tried to calm down the growing anger burning in my chest. I tried to pull it together before I turned back to him.

“I’m sorry. It’ll be a minute on those wings. I’ll bring them over to your table.”

I lied. 

“Ok.”

He gave me another long look. He looked like he wanted to say something, but then he left because there were other people behind him in the line. And I started taking orders again. 

“Oh, GOD!”

I heard Emily exclaim as I looked up at the television that hung on the wall. It was turned down but it scrolled across the screen that a body had been found in Montgomery in an abandoned car fitting the description of the teenage girl that went missing 48 hours ago. No, I thought and I felt my hands starting to shake. Then I heard the unmistakable sound of glass shattering. Everyone around the bar stopped talking and looked at me. Emily rushed over with a broom and a pan.

“It’s ok. It was just an accident.”

She looked at me questioningly with her dark eyes. I had to focus. This might not even be *her*. So, many people went missing in the Ham. Then if it was, maybe I’d give her a funeral service fit for a president, courtesy of my dear mother and Grandfather. Kenzie would get a coffin made out of her favorite stone (rose-quartz). I distracted myself filling orders and then when it got slow, I started to fill *his* order. Only he hadn’t told me where he was sitting and I forgot to ask. That’s when *she* came up to the bar.

“What’ll you have?”

I asked.

“You.”

She said coyly. I’d noticed her with *them* on the dance floor. She had long, curly, hair that hung down to her waist in a pony-tail. I gave her a lazy smile and leaned down to the bar. She wasn’t one of the ones I saw in the pictures or videos, so she wasn’t one of the group.

“What’s your name?”

I asked her.

“Tasha.”

She looked about 16 body wise. She was about 5 feet 8 inches, lean, long legs. But in the face, she looked younger. Yet something about her read, older, experienced like she’d gone through some shit.

“Its nice o meet you Tasha. I’m Chris.”

I lowered my voice and handed her a menu. If I played this right, I could find out what table they were sitting at.

“Take your time. Or I could make you something special. Something I don’t make for just anyone.”

“And what’s that.”

She leaned into me and I caught the scent of a spicy fragrance. But then something happened. The guy on the other side of her laughed and she froze. Then she just abruptly started to walk away. What had I said? I called after her, but she kept right on walking like she hadn’t heard me. This got the guy’s attention and he started to walk after her. Not our business, my mind said. But what if the girl was related to me? She didn’t have my eyes but she slightly resembled that woman (I refused to call her mother), What if she was in trouble? Shit! I turned to Emily.

“Is okay if I take 10? I think I might have known that girl they were talking about on the news.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I should have realized. Sure. Just don’t take *too* long.”

“I’ll be right back.”

I promised. Actually, this bartending thing wasn’t so bad. I was catching on thanks to the fact that I have a photographic memory. It’s too bad that after tonight, I’d have to give it up. When Emily had her back turned, I slipped one of the bottles off the bar into my pocket and slipped out the side and to the back of the club. He wasn’t hard to recognize. He was wearing a neon, orange, shirt. I hide myself in the shadows when the door swung open, I stepped out and swung. CRACK! The man went down and blood started to gush out his head. No! No! NO! NO! I wasn’t trying to *kill* him just *stop* him. I looked around and didn’t see her so that was good. But now I had *this* to deal with. If I didn’t do something soon, he was gonna bleed out.

There was glass everywhere from the broken bottle and I noticed my hand had a cut. I looked around but no one seemed to be around so I made sure I found all the pieces of glass and dumped them in a dumpster not far by. Then I looked at the man. I leaned down next to him, I knew I shouldn’t touch him. Could they dust a body for finger-prints? I pulled out a burner phone, I had in my apron that couldn’t be traced.

“911 what’s your emergency?”

“Hi. I’m at Club Skyy and I found a body back here. I don’t know if he’s alive.”

“Stay put sir. We’ll send an ambulance right over. We have the address. Someone should be there in 10 minutes.”

I hung up the call. No way was I gonna be anywhere near that when they arrived. So I double-checked to make sure I had left any signs of anything, and I opened the door. The door slammed shut behind me but there was a girl standing there in front of me in a red dress. SHIT! Her eyes traveled down to the blood on my hands. How much has she seen?

“This isn’t what it looks like.”

She raised her eyebrows.

“I work here. I was just taking out the trash. I had an accident and I cut myself.”

“You know. I’ve been watching you tonight.”

She purred. Then she started to move closer into me in the narrow hallway. She had this look in her eyes like she wanted to well you know. Four letter word, rhymes with truck.

“I came back here because the girl I was with disappeared but fuck it. I think I’ve found something I want that’s better.”

She pressed her big breast against my chest. Wait a minute the girl she was with?

“Did she have on a red jacket?”

She put her finger to my mouth to shut me up. Then she grabbed me by the neck and shoved her tongue down my throat. Well ok I mean. Not that I was complaining. I obliged her and let her rub herself against me, as my hands gripped her from the back hard, and we tongued each other wildly. I cursed this felt GOOD! I’d always thought Kenzie be my first, but... I couldn’t think about that. In a quick movement, she’d yanked my belt off and tossed it to the floor. Now she was trying to slide my pants down. Since they were twice my size they’d already fallen to my knee and I was standing straight at attention. I said in a low tone stopping her hand before she could grab me.

“Tell me about the girl first.”

She’d already slid her dress up and guess as I suspected didn’t have on anything under it. She went to grab for me again, but I snatched her hand and held it.

“Tell me about the girl.”

I repeated. She gave me a blank look.

“The one you came with. The one you were looking for.”

“You have to give me something first.”

She moaned. Fine! My body couldn’t fight it. She was fine as ***! I grabbed her arm, pushed her to the wall, and got behind her. Sorry Mac, I thought. I closed my eyes and thrust The loud music from the club, covering up her loud noises of pleasure. Every time she yelled out I went in with a little more forcefulness. She seemed to be the type that liked it fast and hard so I gave it to her like she liked it. We must have went at it for about a good 6 or 7 minutes. I think for my first time, I did alright. She was sliding her dress down over her hips.

“Thanks! I need that. What did you say your name was again?”

I went to tell her but she held up her hand.

‘Stop! I don’t wanna know for real. I probably won’t remember anyway. I’m drunk as ***.”

I yanked up my pants, knowing by this time it was way past the 10 minutes I promised I’d be gone.

“The girl?”

She rolled her eyes.

“Oh *her*. Do you know her or something?”

“Not really.”

“So what your trying to hook up with her?”

“Maybe.”

I said vaguely. I certainly didn’t have to give her details. Like she said she wouldn’t remember it *(or me) no way. I looked her over. I remembered her for the bar earlier that night. She was hanging all over some other guy that was peeling off hundreds and tossing them down. No doubt her “man” Not that girls like her had one man, they were seriously committed to. I kinda felt bad for that man, but if his girl wanted to give it up to me and everyone else in this club he was the damn fool for staying with her. 

“What do you wanna know?”

“What’s her name?”

“Sasha. No, wait, Tasha. Or is it Kasha? I’m so bad with names.”

“Never mind. Just show me where she was sitting?”

“That’s another question. Do I get a free drink if I show you?”

You didn’t answer the first one, I thought annoyed. But anything to get this over with and send her back to her man. Now that we’d had our little fun, she was starting to irritate me. So I lead her to the bar. Emily shot me a glance but didn’t say anything. I knew she was trying to be nice and give me a minute to deal with whatever was going on in my head. 

“So, what can I get you? How about a *screwdriver*?”

I taunted. My bad. You’ve already had that. She ignored me and put in her order for some wine. That was simple enough to do. She sipped and then sat down her cup. Then she took me but the arm and pointed their table out.

“Well, that’s where she *was* sitting. Anyways I’m out my boyfriend is probably looking for me.”

She rolled her eyes, pulled down her dress, and stumbled off toward the dance floor. I watched her walk away. Yeah, thanks! I knew I’d probably 9 times out of 10 never see her again. It had taken me long enough to deliver “Grandpa’s” order. I didn’t feel remotely bad for making them wait like I had to wait all these years. If they didn’t like it, what could they do? Have me fired? (I snorted) I didn’t even work here. So, I fixed the drinks and wings. I put a black rose by *hers*. Now all I had to do was wait.

And it really *was* worth it. For instance, I’d looked up Grampa’s social media page in passing. There were some pixs of him with his fraternity brothers and some of an attractive, Blasian, (black and Asian) lady. His status was “In a relationship”. I looked on her page and she was also a doctor. He really seemed to be head over heels in love with her, because of all the likes he’d given on her social pages and all the pictures he’d posted of her. Yet, there he was on the dance floor hugged up on this other woman who interestingly enough looked like the woman *she* had pictures of on her page. 

Wouldn’t it just be a shame if somehow those pictures just happened to find their way to his girlfriend? When it got slow, I discreetly snapped some shots. A man in a uniform stepped up to the bar and pulled Emily to the side.

“Can I speak to you for a minute about what happened outside your club?”

Damn! Forgot about that! Emily looked confused and stepped to the side. I heard him ask.

“Is your manager here tonight? We received an anonymous call about a dead body found in the ally beside your club?”

Her face paled. 

“Dead body? I’m sure there was some kind of mistake. There haven't been any incidents here tonight."

When “Dan” (I take it) appeared looking just as dumbfounded that his club was yet again in trouble. I heard Emily say.

“I swear, I didn’t hear anything. I was here with “Chris” all night.”

“” Chris”? I don’t see Chris." "The new guy you sent to train.”

“I didn’t hire any new guys this week to train.”

Welp, it had been *fun* but that was my cue. So, I slipped through pulsating purple and blue lights of the club. Leaving them looking for “Chris” at the bar. On the way out, someone blocked me and got in my face. My defenses went up. 

“HEY!”

He demanded. He got in my space.

“Yeah?”

“You haven’t seen my girl, have you? Short, red, dress, dark hair, nice body.”

“Nah, man. I haven’t seen her.”

“You sure?”

He asked suspiciously. I shrugged.

“I mean a lot of em had on red dresses with nice bodies so.”

“You right. My bad man. I ain’t mean to come off like that. She was just with me one minute and then she disappeared. I kinda saw her checking you out so I thought.”

“I was behind the bar all night. I’m just getting off and about to go to the crib.”

“I’ll let you go. You must be tired.”

I nodded. But wait. What’s this? In the distance, I heard the sound of ambulances and they seemed to be getting closer and closer. Until they were pulling up right outside. And now men were getting out with a stretcher and rushing toward the door.

“That’s a nice hat.”

I said to the guy that had blocked me.

“Thanks! It’s actually signed by.”

“Let me have it.”

I said in a low tone. The guy looked like he was about to laugh, but then saw I was playing and handed it over with no more questions asked. As I walked away from the club, I put the baseball hat on backward. Then even though it was freezing cold, I ditched the shirt in a trash can, and pulled my hoodie back out, put it on, and pulled it over my head. I walked down the block to where “my ride” was parked. 

I was mentally talking to myself. I’d gotten out of there. The real Chris would wake up. Maybe he’d have a headache but a couple of Aleve would fix that. He could always get another watch. He’d probably have a replacement on in a month or less. 

The guy in the alley would be fine. He might need stitches, but he wasn’t dead. I’d seen people on TV smash people over the head with bottles and all it did was knock them out cold for some hours. I’d searched the ground high and low for glass fragments. They were in the trash and I’d worn gloves and not touched any of the pieces even if they were to look in the trash. The phone couldn’t be traced. It was a pre-paid one. I’d burn it later on. 

The girl had gotten away safely. Not sure why I cared about that but. Then I’d given the other one a little ok A LOT of well-needed pleasure, and she could relax I didn’t tell her man. And *her* well karma had a funny way of working itself out. As a turned the corner, at the end of the block I saw a couple passionately kissing pressed up against a car door. 

They were so wrapped up in each other that they paid me no attention. His back was pressed up against the car door, and he lifted her up, wrapping her legs around his waist. A sudden chill hit. His face was buried somewhere between her neck and cleavage. Her eyes were closed in ecstasy. Her eyes just happened to open at just the moment I walked past. Our eyes locked a second and I gave her a smirk but continued to walk. It wasn't much longer after that I heard a thunk as if someone had hit the ground hard. I didn’t even turn around. I heard him curse loudly and was probably scrambling to find his cell phone. A never more satisfying noise I don’t think I’d ever heard. It was even more satisfying than the ones the hot one had made earlier that night.

I was halfway home when I heard the distinctive sound of a cop car behind me. DAMN IT! What the hell could he want, I looked out of the corner of my eye at the officer that was not colored. I didn’t need this shit tonight. But I obediently pulled over to the gas station in 5 points West. The area had a little light, but I made sure to put my phone someplace where it could record EVERYTHING! I hoped this would not turn into a Trayvon situation. The cop got out and approached me. He wasn’t smiling. I kept my face neutral.

“Do you have any idea what time it is?”

He started.

“Where are you coming from this late?”

Ok so yeah, I know this looked bad. It was after 3:00 in the morning and I was out riding around. In his eyes, it probably looked like I’d just come from ripping off someplace or someone. He was eyeing my bag.

“My mother works the late shift. I was visiting her. She works at Brookwood Hospital. She works the late shift.”

I answered. I wanted to tell him none of your damn business, but I knew better. Just answer their questions, I heard Mama’s voice pleading in my head to just give them what they wanted if a situation like this ever arose. 

“There was a disturbance tonight downtown you wouldn’t know anything about that would you?”

“No. I wouldn’t.”

I answered simply. He was fishing and trying to get me on *something*.

“Give me your bag.”

He practically ripped the thing off my arm and overturned the contents onto the ground. He wouldn’t find what he looking for. He didn’t know about the secret compartment in the bag. Instead what spilled out was my phone, my headphones, a few comic books, and my wallet. He picked that up and shifted through my wallet. Thankfully, there were only 5 dollars “in the wallet”. It would have been a pretty, shitty, break-in if all I stole was 5 dollars. But now he was looking at the headphones.

“Where’d you get these?”

“My mom gave them to me as a birthday present.”

Before I knew it he was slapping a pair of handcuffs on me, had pushed me to his vehicle, and had slammed my head down against the front of the car."

So you thought you could get off ripping off these headphones did you lil punk?

"I didn't steal those. My mom."

"SHUT UP!"

He hissed and then he pulled out his gun and pointed it right to my head.

“I’m gonna have to take you into the station for driving an unauthorized vehicle and for theft.”

It would have been pointless to argue so instead, I let him shove me into his vehicle, laid back against the seat, and just shut my eyes as he took me into the station. Moms wouldn’t be PISSED! But she’d clear up that I’d stolen the headphone. She’d probably GO OFF when she saw that he’d slammed me into the car. Hopefully, she’d put up a lawsuit. She’d be pissed at me too of course for being out that late riding when she’d specifically told me not to ride that go-cart on the streets and I’d probably be grounded for some weeks. I’d just have to think of a logical reason why I was out that late.

At least the cell they put me in was empty. I stretched out on the cot and closed my eyes trying to get my story straight. I had no idea how many hours had passed when I heard a click of keys being turned in the lock, and a guard and my moms on the other side of the bars. 

“You're free to go!”

I tried to gauge my mom's facial expression but it looked calm. She looked even more tired than she had earlier. That didn’t make me feel good. I followed her to the car, opened the door, and got in. She didn’t talk so I did.

“I’m sorry.”

“You owe me 75.00.”

She begin.

“I know. I’ll pay you.”

“I told them you were with me, but you left my job hours ago.”

I decided to go with some version of the truth.

“After I left you one of my boys called and told me to come to the club. He needed me to bring him something. He couldn’t find anyone else. I was just gonna go in and drop it off but.”

Ok, well the club part was true.

“So, you went to the club? Let me guess there was this girl.”  
Well, I wouldn’t exactly call her a girl.

“I thought I’d see my biological mother. Yeah, I know it’s crazy.”

She sighed.

“Why did you think she’d just *happen* to be at this particular club on this particular night.”

Ok, my moms wasn’t a fool and could see through lies so I told her.

“Because I know who she is.”

“You know who she is.”

She repeated.

“She’s a singer and I heard she was at Club Skyy.”

“And that’s why you went?”

“Yeah. I was just curious.”

“Did you see her? Did you get to talk to her?”

“I saw her, but no I didn’t say anything to her.”

“Well, you certainly went through a lot just to go to a club that you weren’t supposed to even be allowed in on a vehicle that you weren’t supposed to be driving to see someone you didn’t even get a chance to talk to. You know you're grounded right?”

“Yeah, I know. Are you mad?”

“Were you drinking?”

“No.”

“Well, I guess that will take a week off. I can’t be mad that you tried to see your mother. Hell, I can’t even really be mad that you tried to sneak and go to a club. I’ve done that when I was your age. 2 weeks, no phone, I’ll find a way to get your *car* but you can’t drive it till further notice. It’s just not safe Reke. You might hurt somebody at night and I know you don’t want that. And you can’t go anywhere other than school stuff and your basketball games. Ok?”

“You know I wouldn’t have to ride that if I had a car, right?”

“When you get to high school we can talk about a car. Do you think you can wait until then or do I have to take that cart back to where I bought it?”

“I’m just saying.”

“Is that a knot I see on your head? Did that cop do that to you?”

“Yeah, but I just wanna sleep it off. Can we just talk about it tomorrow ma? I'm tired!"

“NO! We are *not* gonna let this ride. First thing tomorrow morning, I’m going to go into the station and file a complaint against that officer. It burns me up how they think they can hide behind their badges and assault young, black, men whenever they damn well choose. He could have just written you up for the go-cart. He had no right to handcuff you and accuse you of stealing those head phones.”

She fumed. I just listened. I mean yeah, I was pissed but I knew realistically that officer if he got anything would be a light slap on the wrist. It wouldn’t even be worth trying to take him to court because it wouldn’t do a damn thing. If anything, I’d just take this as a lesson learned. Not that if they choose it, they wouldn’t hesitate to do the same thing again. That’s just how it was and had been for years. 

“Did you hear they found a body?”

She said quietly as we pulled into the driveway. With everything else that had gone on, I’d forgotten all about *that*. I felt the weight of it sinking down on me now. DAMN! I just stared straight ahead.

“Maybe it’s not her. They still have to identify the body.”

I didn’t respond. The door to the garage closed and I let myself out. I straight up the steps to the second floor. Then up to the third to my room. I closed the door, stripped down to my boxers, and then got in the bed and shut my eyes and the rest of the world out until sleep came.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cinda reminisces about a special memory at another club that took place a year after she met her boyfriend Romeo Bryce. She then is approached at Club Skyy by a man named Drew that offers her his friendship. Soon, after she starts to experience heavy side effects after consuming the drinks that were delivered to her table. (Fade is the title of this post and relates to the new drug I created. As I know there's not a drug called this It's pretty self-explanatory. But we will get more into Fade in posts to come). Enjoy!

Lucinda  
Fade

After talking to Bricks, ah decided ah needed a drink something serious so I stepped back into the club. I got back to our section only to find it empty, but it looked like someone had just delivered our drinks. Ah sipped a little of my own drink and then eyed m’ah cousins. She wouldn’t mind and if she did ah’d just have to get her another one. Well, that is if Treal didn't. Besides ah needed a buzz. I lifted her glass and let the ice-cold sensation rush into my system. As the lights pulsated and the music blasted well into the night, my mind started to wander as I heard a familiar track. Ah started to think back.

He’d hurried around to my side of the car, opened the door for me, and then took m’ah hand. We were standing in front of an old building that looked like a bank.

“Don’t tell me you had me get all dressed up to go to a bank.”

Ah pouted, but he just grinned mischievously.

“But this isn’t just *any* bank love.”

He took m’ah hand and kissed it. Then opened the door and let me walk in. Inside looked like a typical bank lobby with furniture and a glass window with tellers. One stepped forward to greet us. He flashed his gold, card, and the teller told us to follow him. 

“Should ah be scared?”

Ah whispered as ah followed him and the teller down a dark hallway.

“This doesn’t involve dragons does it?”

Ah teased. Even though ah knew such things didn’t exist. Still ah couldn’t help thinking of a very similar scene in the movie Harry Potter and the Deadly Hallows. He leaned down and murmured seductively in my ear.

“No, but the way you look in *that* I may just want to devour you later.”

M’ah cheeks turned as red as the dress ah’d worn. It was one of m’ah own creations. It had taken a very long time to make it was a strapless top made of rose petals that connected to a shorter “skirt” made of petals and underneath was a long, sheer, skirt with the petals at the bottom. He and ah had at this point been together a little over a year but as of yet hadn’t been intimate. Ah was thinking maybe ah had waited long enough. Part of me still felt slightly guilty about being involved with someone else, but it had been sooo long! Ah hadn’t heard from him and if he could do his own thing so could ah’,

We took the elevator up and got off on the top floor. I watched as the teller stepped up to a huge, old, fashioned, vault and turned When the vault opened to my surprise there was a night club inside.”

“Oh.”

Ah gasped. Ah wasn’t expecting that! A golden glow of light surrounded me as ah entered and found myself standing on the inside of a lobby with black, leather couches (with plush gold pillows) that ran the length of the wall. There were tables and chairs all about the room. The tables were lite with golden, flickering, candles for atmosphere. Outside the windows was an amazing view overlooking the city.

“You showed me where you and your girl use to hang out and your plans to restore it. Well, this is my spot. I call it "The Vault". 

As he gave me the tour, he explained the motivation behind it.

“When I younger, my Granddaddy used to clean buildings for a living. I remember him talking me with him sometimes to clean banks. I guess that’s why I’m so drawn to nightlife because I still remember looking out of those buildings and picking him up and seeing all the lights. It inspired me to make this place. “

He showed me a room that had an in-ground pool with what looked like gold pieces floating around in the pool. Ah laughed.

“Ducktails?”

He looked sheepish.

“Yeah. Guilty. I just thought if I’m gonna do the whole vault thing might as well. I know it’s not that big but that was intentional. It’s only for me and some close friends that are in the know. I have an office back here, a storage space, and a kitchen. Upfront is the main lounge, then there’s the *dance floor* and the DJ booth.”

“It’s very cool! Ah like your club!”

He grinned and escorted me to a seat. There was no-one there but us. He poured champagne into my flute that had been chilling on the table in front of us in a silver bucket. A server immediately came over to us and sat down a dish with chocolate, covered strawberries. He also handed me a gold rose. Instead of the DJ playing loud, dance, hits, the music was older, RNB, slow songs. With the night lights of the city through the window, the whole thing felt intimate and cozy.

“What are we celebrating?”

“A couple of things. I know I’ve been busy working on my comeback album and I haven’t been around as much but I just wanted you to know I didn’t forget.”

“Our 1-year anniversary.”

I said softly. 

“You remembered.”

He stood up and reached into one of the security boxes in the walls and handed me a carefully wrapped package with a bow on top.

“You didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I think that may be the first time I have ever heard that. Open it please.”

“But I didn’t get you anything. Honestly, I was mad at you. One minute you act like you want this and then the next I don’t hear from you in weeks, and I hear about you photographed at an event with someone else.”

He took my hand.

“I know and I’m sorry. You don’t deserve that Lucinda. I know your sick of me acting like I can’t make up my mind. But those other women you hear about me with, they aren’t you. They never will be. *Your* the one I want in my future.”

He reached for my hand and stared into my eyes.

“I’m done playing games. I’m done with the lies and laying up with a different female in every city in and out my hotel room and my phone ringing off the hook when we’re together. As a matter of fact, I disconnected my old phone and got a new number. The only one’s who’ll have my number are business contacts, family, and a few friends. I’m done with all of it. Please! Say you’ll believe me. Say from this day forward we can start a new chapter together. Say you’ll be my lady exclusively.”

I remember looking into his eyes and seeing nothing but sincerity inside. I felt my own eyes mist over and I nodded unable to speak. I remember being so touched, I threw my arms around him and him squeezing me tightly and murmuring “I love you so much, baby.” I remember tearing the paper open and staring in confusion at what looked like a blue-print in my lap. I laughed.

“Most guys would get their lady's jewelry.”

I teased. He laughed and made a face.

“Since when have I ever been *most guys*? Do you know what that is?”

He reached over and put his hand over mine holding the paper and laced our fingers together.

“I’ve been looking at land. I’ve even put down a down payment on some. One day baby, I want to be able to build my Queen the castle she’s always wanted.”

"And what's the other reason?"

"The release of your second album on and your single topping 1 on the charts the first week it debuted."

He leaned in and kissed me tenderly.

"Congratulations baby! I'm so proud of you!"

I glanced down at the phone. It was vibrating. He’d already left me a ton of messages. 

“Where are you? I called your house and Mom said you and Daddy had left to go to Birmingham?”

My thumbs lingered over the screen of my phone. Ah needed to get this over with. It wasn’t fair for me to have him holding on. Although it cut me something deep to think of him moving on to some other girl after all we’d been through. Ah, don’t think ah’d be able to bear it. Ah reached for a glass, not caring which one and sipped because all of a sudden m’ ah throat felt dry. Someone walked up and sat in one of the seats across from me. Ah looked up surprised, it was a man, but not m’ ah uncle.

“Hi. I hope you don’t mind. I saw you sitting over here by yourself. You looked like you could use a friend. My name’s Drew.”

I looked him over. He was quite attractive! He had dirty, swept, back, blond hair and brown eyes. Nice build in the olive shirt, paisley tie, and pants he wore. 

“Ah guess m’ah mind was somewhere else.”

I apologized.

“I could tell.”

He said softly. Ah also noticed he had very nice lips. 

“Did I look that spacey?”

“Well, I can tell that you look like you’d rather be anywhere else. Aren’t you having fun tonight?”

“Oh, Ah am! I’m not having a *bad* time. It's well it’s just been a very rough couple of months. Ah was hoping to be able to come out tonight to take m’ah mind of things.” 

Ah sighed.

“Yeah. I get that. The same. This week alone, Monday there was a shooting at some apartments in Chateau Glen Oaks and a mother was shot and a kid was injured from an attempted robbery. Tuesday let’s see a body was found on I-59. Still not sure what the situation was there. Wednesday there was a kidnapping for a teenage girl.”

“Are you an officer?”

He sighed.

“Unfortunately. “

I thought about all the stories ah’d heard over the years of m’ah young, African-American brothers dying for asinine reasons because cops thought it was their privileges to shoot first and *not* ask questions ever. Drew shook his head.

“Ok. I guess I deserve that.”

“What? I didn’t say anything.”

Had what ah was thinking showed on m’ah face?

“You didn’t have to say anything. Your face said it all. But there are some of us who are decent. Although I know it may seem hard to believe. But I believe black lives matter. I believe ALL lives matter! It actually makes me sick to my stomach every time I turn on the news and hear about another one of us senselessly using force or weapons when it’s just not called for. It’s really not how they trained us and it just seems like it never ends.”

He said heavily and looked out at the dance floor.

“It messes with me sometimes. I just wish there was something *(* could do. It’s weeks like this, I really wonder if I should change careers. Or maybe cities I don’t know.”

“That’s got to be rough.”

Ah sympathized. The thought of having to see dead bodies and blood on the regular sent a cold chill through me. Ah couldn’t imagine anything worse than that. 

“You don’t like it here?”

He shrugged indifferently.

“I moved here some years ago to be closer to my mother. She lost my Dad. He was an officer too and he got hit in a stake out. I didn’t want her to be alone so. She took his death pretty hard.”

“I’m sorry.”

He smiled.

“It’s okay. I just feel like *here* is where I need to be right now so I’m not going anywhere.”

“Ah can understand that.”

Ah said thinking of how ah’d moved home to be closer to m’ah mom because she needed me.

“Are you from here?”

He asked. I shook m’ah head.

“Ah’m just here visiting family. M’ah cousin is having this thing for m’ah aunt tomorrow. She passed some years ago.”

“A thing? What kinda thing?”

“A fashion show. M’ah aunt was an international model and the money’s gonna go to an aviation school here. She died in a plane crash.”

I explained.

“A fashion show hunh? Cool! Can I come?”

Ah snorted.

“What? I’m serious!”

“*Your* into fashion.”

“Well you *did* say you were gonna be there.”

There was a warm tone in his voice as he held his gaze on me for a minute. Ah felt my cheeks heat up. Then he said shyly.

“And then you said the money will go to an aviation school. Planes are one of my hobbies.” 

“You fly?”

“I do. I have my license. Maybe one day I can show you. I don’t have my own plane yet, but I’d love to own one of my own someday. You aren’t afraid of heights, are you?”

Ah laughed.

“It depends. Ah definitely don’t want to jump out of one or being in anything dangling 100 feet up in the air.”

He just laughed back.

“I would never do that. I’d always wanna make sure you felt safe with me.”

He paused.

“Can I tell you something?”

I nodded.

“I’m not trying to freak you out or come off as one of those guys that’s trying to push up on you, but I don’t know what it is. But I saw you sitting here by yourself and I knew I had to say something to you. Even if you shot me down, I knew I had to try. I like talking to you! I know you said you're not from here and I already know your with someone. But I just want to get to know you. Can I get to know you?”

He pleaded softly.

“We can take it as slow as you want. There’s no pressure at all. I just. Just the fact that your sitting here talking to me right now is making me happier than I’m been in a long time. Seeing you smile and you laugh.”

Ah made a face and burst out laughing. The alcohol was starting to kick in. Plus, ah wasn’t the old Cinda I use to be. The old Cinda, “the romantic”, the one who believed in knights, and princes, and castles would have played right into his charming words, and his nice smile. The old Cinda would have allowed herself to get swept right up in the fantasy he was trying to spin. But the new Cinda, well ah don’t think she believed in fairy tales anymore.

‘Ah bet you say that to all the ladies.”

“Ladies? That would mean I talk to more than one. Nah. I *have* been approached once or twice because they see me and they think I have a nice body or something. But after a few dates and the physicality wears off it never sticks. So, for the past couple years I’ve just been focusing on work and being there for my mom. And my job keeps me pretty busy so.”

“So, what is it that you want Drew?”

I sat my glass down, looked him dead in the eye, and got straight to the point. I wasn’t *the* best at judging intentions. Look at how things had turned out with “Rick” I thought bitterly.

“I know you don’t know me. You have no reason to believe me or even trust me. You just meet me at a *club*. But I’m not a player. In my whole life, I’ve had 2 serious girlfriends. One was in high school and one was in college. And I’m not trying to spit game at you so I can get you back to my place. I just wanna get to know you that’s all. Would that be so bad to get to know a new friend?”

I started to answer, but a weird sensation hit me. The alcohol wasn’t just loosening me up and making me feel relaxed, it was making my body heavy. I fought a yawn.

“Excuse me! Ah’m sorry. All of a sudden ah’m starting to feel a little tired.”

He looked at his watch.

“It is getting pretty late. You said you came here to attend your family’s thing. Did you just get here today?”

I nodded. My eyes felt so heavy.

“You must be tired from the drive.”

“Ah guess ah’m not as young as ah use to be.”

Ah said lightly. Me, Reece, and Cara had done late, night, flights, and late-night events. Delta and ah had even had some conversations that went into early hours of the morning. But right now, ah was fighting not to just stretch out on this couch and pass out. Irritably, I kinda wished he’d leave so ah could do that. Drew was a nice enough guy but right now ah just wanted to sleep.

“You know what could help?”

“What’s that?”

“Caffeine.”

“Oh yeah. Ok well I can see what they have at the bar. They might serve coffee or something with coffee in it. Or they probably have sodas, like Coke or Pepsi. Did you want me to get you one of those?”

Ah nodded tiredly.

“Ok. I’ll go get that. I’ll be right back.”

Ah couldn’t go anywhere if ah wanted to. Ah didn’t wait a good minute before he’d left. The couches weren’t that big, but I slumped over. If ah could just close m’ah eyes for a second, maybe this wave of exhaustion would pass. That’s all ah need is a minute. That was the last thought I remembered thinking until ah passed out.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I called this post 50 Shades of Blue because blue represents many things in Caryn's life. If the source of not only her happiness but the cause of her trauma and pain. In this post, Caryn and Afrika think of a way to honor a baby that got kidnapped, raped, and killed in Birmingham. I called her "Cookie" here. But it was taken from the events that happened to a 3-year-old girl hear by the name of "Cupcake". Caryn gives Afrika a tour of her new place, and Afrika gives Caryn a new look. Later on, Caryn meets up with her agent (Jaime) who gives her a couple of opportunities to pursue in the future. After meeting with Jaime, being in her old neighborhood start to bring back bad memories. When going to her old apartment, to pay her mother, Diane, a visit Caryn discovers a shocking realization. RIP Kamile "Cupcake" McKinney, RIP Chadwick Boseman. You are loved and remembered!

Cara  
Fifty Shades of Blue

“Is he gonna be ok?”

Afrika asked as I got back in the car. We traded seats. She got on the passenger’s side and I got in the driver’s seat.

“I hope so.”

He had brought up something I hadn’t thought about in a while. Something I’d let myself forget. Something I wasn’t trying to think about right now. I turned the key in the ignition and pulled out of the car park of Harlem’s step-sister’s house.

“Damn! Do you think she’s really?”

Afrika trailed off. A heavy, thick, silence hung in the air. 

“I don’t know. A lot of people here lately have come up missing and the more days that pass and they aren’t heard from well it doesn’t look good.”

I said honestly because I really didn’t want to think about that either. I could still hear the excitement in his voice that day when he’d come by my dorm at BSC to give me the news that he was gonna be an uncle. 

“I heard about that little girl that went missing. Those were some SICK mofo’s! They didn’t have to do that little girl like that! She was a BABY!”

Afrika raged.

“Yeah. But that whole thing felt off to me. Why would you leave your baby at a party with strangers that you don’t know anything about? Then they said that *he* was at some club partying his ass off. It doesn’t sound like they were too concerned to me.”

“So, you saying they were *in* on it?”

“I just don’t put anything past *anyone* anymore.”

I said sharply. Afrika leaned back in the seat.

“It just pisses me off! She reminds me a lot of my little girl and to *think* that someone would do the same to her. I’d KILL them! I’d go to that jail and blow their fucking heads off!”

“I didn’t know you had a daughter.”

“Yeah. It’s why Onyx really hasn’t been in the studio in a while. I needed some time off. My mom has her back in New York. She watches her for me. She just turned 1. We had a big Candy land theme party for her.”

She pulled up some pictures on her cell-phone and I glanced at them quickly.

“She looks just like you.”

Afrika smiled.

“Mama showed me some pictures of me when I was her age. She said she swears we could be twins. I don’t know every since I had her, I’ve been wondering should I even go back to recording at all. Eboni and Raven have been bugging me about getting back in the studio, but I’m just not feeling it Then girl groups played themselves out 20 years ago.”

“Have you talked to them?”

“Not really.”

She turned her gaze out the window.

“You should. Then maybe you can get together and work something out. If they still want to record maybe Sapphire can work with the two of them, or have them do solo projects until you decide what you want to do.”

“Are you still going to record?”

“I wasn’t planning to any time soon, but what was done to that little girl had me thinking. It’s been weighing on me that even though I was in LA when it happened, I *should* still do something. This is my hometown. She was one of my peoples."

“What were you thinking?”

Afrika looked at me curiously.

“I don’t know maybe. They’re holding services for her Sunday at the church I use to attend with my Mom, New Beginning Christian Ministry. Maybe they’ll let me sing to honor her memory.”

“They would be *all* over that! That would be the BID'NESS!"

“I don’t know if I’ll have time to write something new, but I can see if her family wants something in particular or if she had a special song she liked.”

“You should try to talk to them *today* if you want to do it by Sunday.”

I nodded feeling like it was the least I could do. 

“Then, maybe I could set up some kind of charitable organization. I could contact some of my sorority sisters and see what we can come up with.”

“Do you think I could be a Zeta? I’ve always loved their programs I heard about this program where they support literacy programs, are building water wells, and donating rice and food throughout the villages in Ghana. I’d love to be involved with something like that.”

I gave Afrika a smile.

“Of course. We need strong women like you in the organization that want to make a difference. I haven’t been too a meeting in a while because of my schedule, but I can introduce you to some people while we’re here that are over the graduate program.”

“I’d really like to volunteer to help low-performance schools by maybe doing something like tutoring or purchasing supplies and equipment. Or I could help with whatever educational programs. I use to want to be a teacher.”

“Zeta will be lucky to have you.”

I told her sincerely. 

“I’ll make some calls.”

“Oh, I know what you can do?”

She said excitedly as we drove past Linn Park.

“Do you remember that festival. Shit! What was the name of it?”

“City Stages.”

“Yeah do yal still have that?”

I shook my head.

City Stages was a 3-day art and music festival in downtown Birmingham that was held at Linn Park from 1989 to 2009. Big-time stars preformed, regional acts, up and coming singers, and popular bands I’d even taken pictures with two of hip-hops legends (Doggy and Ridiculous) 

“You know they ended that."

"No girl I ain't know."

"The last one was in 2009. They lost a lot of money so they decided to just cancel it.”

“I was thinking that you said you didn’t have time to write a song for the funeral, but maybe you *could* write a song and all the proceeds could go to something in her name or to her family for their loss. I was thinking you could have performed it at City Stages.”

“It’s not a bad idea tho.”

I considered.

“What if *we* put together an event like City Stages in the park where we could have acts. You still have your Starlight connections, even though you won’t be with Eye Candy. Then I can talk to the artist at HRDAZADYMOND records. We can have different stages for different acts and vendors. Maybe we can even get artists to design T-Shirts with her picture. You can even have your Starling students perform. They can dance, or help at the food places, or they can sell their art.”

I nodded. I liked it. It would take some work, but...

“I think we might actually be able to pull that off.”

“Everyone here will be behind it. I heard the whole city was devastated when they heard about her death.”

Again, I nodded in agreement. Maybe I could even speak to businesses to sponsor the event. I started to get a little excited at all the opportunities presenting themselves that this event could bring. This would be not only good for “Cookie’s” family but for *me*. It would take my mind off *that thing* that happened in Orlando. I added it to my mental list: speak to the church, talk to some of my sorras, and see what I’d need to do to make this event happen. 

“So, are we getting another room, or going to your Pops?”

“Neither.”

I wasn’t quite ready to speak to Daddy yet. There would be time for that tomorrow. On the way to my destination, I made a stop for food. It was way past lunchtime, so I hit up a WINGS OUT truck on the other side of a grocery store and got a party tray for us. I mixed it was plain, hot, lemon pepper, and honey mustard, honey ranch, and garlic parmesan wings. Along with that, I got fries. Then stopped at the store for a 2-liter Pepsi. Afrika laughed as we waited for them to call the number for our order. 

“Shit girl! Are we having a party or sum?” 

I shook my head.

“I just know how much you love you some wings!”

“You ain’t never lied bout that.”

“Just my way of saying I appreciate you coming with me and hooking me up for tomorrow.”

“Do you ever miss it here?”

She asked as I asked the guy to add a couple of slices of Red-Velvet cake to the order. He smiled and flirtatiously told us he had us. Afrika gave a flirty smile back of her own. 

“Sometimes.”

Unlike my sister, I never needed the rush of a big city like Atlanta or LA. Birmingham might not have had *as* much going on as some of those places, but it was home. My Daddy was here. I’d loved going to BSC (Birmingham Southern College) and getting to know my sisters and the other people in my class. I could have been happy here. I could have graduated, finished my studies, and gotten a job working on an administration board for schools. I could have married Wade who was studying law. By now we’d probably have 2 kids. Instead, I just had to be stubborn and now that man was probably married to a woman he loved the hell out of...That woman could have been me. But I couldn’t linger in the past. No! I just need to get through this fashion show tomorrow without falling on my ass in whatever monstrosity of shoes I’m supposed to wear and not fumble my lines when trying to describe the clothes. Then Sunday (if they say it’s ok) I can sing, and the next day I’ll be right back to LA. My life wasn’t *here* anymore. Was it really even in LA?

“You don’t mind if I eat in your car, do you?”

“Knock yourself out.”

“Good cause I’m STARVING!”

I let her dig in and mindlessly flipped on a Birmingham station 9.57 JAMZ (a station that played up to date hip hop that I use to staying listening to). I use to know every song, every lyric, every artist. Now I wondered when had I get old, Afrika let out a scream, told me to turn up this song playing, and the started rapping along with the two, popular, female, rappers about making men sprung off their soaking coochies. I mean was this *really* what music had come to these days? I wrinkled my face. I mean, I’m all for women being assertive about their sexuality, but “I don’t wanna spit. I wanna gulp. I wanna gag. I wanna choke. I want you to touch that little dangly dang that swang in the back of my throat?” The lyrics left a LOT to be desired.

Thankfully I pulled up into 1503 Haddon Dr in Hoover. I pulled around back to multiple storied blue house that sat in an area with lots of trees. 

“And whose place is this again?”

Afrika asked still stuffing her face with fries.

“Mine! Come on! I’ll give you the tour.”

I found the key in my purse and started to talk as I did.

“It’s bigger on the inside. I didn’t want anything *too* over the top.”

I led us inside the door and into the hallway.

“I’ve only had it a little over a year. Even though my Daddy said I could always stay with him when I visit, I didn’t wanna crowd his space you know. I think he’s getting serious about this lady he’s been going out with. Not that I’d probably even see them. Wait till you see *his* place. It’s HUGE!”

“Word! I like your place tho. It’s nice! Shit, it’s better than my little cramped apartment. Is this your first time buying a house?”

I nodded.

“Yes!”

It felt good to own my own place. I never really had a place of my own. The condominium Reece, Cinda, and I shared when we first signed to Starlight was rented. I wasn’t here that much but I felt a rush every time I stepped through the door of *my house*.

She looked up at an 8 ft tall painting on my wall of me with an ornate headdress and a long braid. My hands folded in a Genie type manner. I wore the genie, mid-drift, baring blouse, with golden beads down the front and harem pants. Gold bracelets adorned my arms as well as symbols on my arms, neck, and midriff. The interesting thing was it looked like I was wrapped in vines.

“OH SHIT! GIRL IS THAT YOU?”

“Isn’t it gorgeous! One of my students at the Starling gave it to me for my birthday. She’s so talented! Her name is Nyema. She just started at the Starling and is in the visual arts program. It’s one of my favorites pieces in the whole house.”

I said staring up at it. Sometimes it was hard to pull my eyes away from how realistic the depiction was. The picture could definitely be hanging in someone’s museum or be on the cover of a magazine. But to be so talented Nyema was so shy. She didn’t even want me to show the piece to anyone. I continued the tour. 

“So around here to the right is the dining room. I gave it an African safari kind of feel.”

I’d gotten mahogany, chairs, and frames that displayed African art. There were cabinets that held knick-knacks (statues, dolls, and elephants) that I’d bought when Eye Candy had shot a video in Kenya. The walls I’d painted a soft tan. There were even some ceremonial masks on the wall. The one I wore in the video was displayed in a shadow box.

The next room I showed her was the living room. I’d had the walls done with Egyptian carvings The furniture (couch and chairs) were a soft, dusty, red which also had hieroglyphics in gold in the material. On the couch sat teal and gold pillows. And on the wall was a big 4D television.

“I guess you can say I was trying to give the place an African palace kind of feel.”

“Niice!”

She said looking at my Black Panther movie posters around the room. Actually, the whole phenomenon and its excitement that rippled through our community surrounding the movie for the first black superhero were what inspired the theme of my house. 

“And you got them all autographed too!”

I had posters of T’Challa, Killmonger, Romonda, Zuri, Shuri, and Naki (all framed). I also had one of T’Challa all geared up and crouched on a car. I smiled.

“I meet Hardick Rosman at a charity event for cancer. He was so nice. He gave us tickets for an early screening of the movie before it even hit theatres.”

“That man is PHOINE! What else did he give you?”

She teased and raised her eyebrows. I hit her arm playfully.

“He’s *married*!”

I pointed out. Even though secretly I did have just a tiny crush on him. I still have the pictures I took with him on my cell phone. I’d had them printed out and sitting on the dresser in my room. Afrika looked at me like so. I just shook my head. 

“What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”

She mumbled. I led her through a door.

“My kitchen I wanted something different. I wanted to make it feel like you’d stepped into the middle of Narnia. I already had so many trees around me in this area. I took what was supposed to be the sunroom or porch because it’s so open and I turned it into my kitchen and added all kinds of plants.”

“That’s different! Kinda like a rain forest. Did you do all this yourself?”

She followed me up the stairs to the second floor.

“I did. I picked out all the art, furniture, and colors for all the rooms. This is one of the upstairs bedrooms. There’s someone who stays here sometimes that I’m helping out. A really nice lady who lost everything a while back when tornado’s and storms destroyed a lot of buildings here. My Dad told me she worked at the information desk at the hospital so I reached out to her. It works out. She tries to pay me no matter how much I tell her she doesn’t have to do that. So we agreed that until she can get her situation straightened out she’ll just keep up the place for me when I’m not here and that’s all the payment I need. This is her room.”

“That’s really nice!”

I closed her door. Her room was done in a deep purple color with a lighter purple and black bed sheet with butterflies. There were a lot of butterflies’ pictures on the wall. 

“Is she here now?”

“No, she told me she’ll be visiting her daughter in Tuscaloosa for a few weeks because her daughter just had a baby. When I called last week to check on her she was all excited about being a first-time grandmother.”

“And you weren’t worried about letting a stranger stay at your place?”

She whispered as if the lady could hear us.

“No. I’ve met her. She’s a sweet lady. She’s older but you’d never know it the way she gets around. She works at the hospital, then she volunteers at the library. She works on the board of trustees at the church. She’s always going on trips to the casino. She has a busier life than I do. Plus, I think she has a gentleman friend she goes out with occasionally to the movies.”

“Get it, girl! I ain’t mad at cha! I hear that! Do you ever see yourself having kids?”

Afrika asked me. I paused as I opened the door to my master bedroom. Should I tell her? Well, I guess there was no point keeping it secret. I allowed her into my space which was done in a very simple and clean Bohemian style. The bed had a shelf above it that had prints of two tribal looking ladies in profile (in black ink). On the floor were wicker baskets (by the bed and by the fireplace) and in front of the bed were wicket trunks. There was a desk, a big, walk-in closet, and a big comfortable hammock type chair with a black and white tribal print throw. Above the fireplace was a big-screen television. 

“I did once, but I lost it not that long ago.”

“DAMN! I AM SO SORRY!”

“It’s ok. I was probably doing too much. We were on tour and doing shows every night. I should have just slowed down like the doctor told me, but me thinking I was super-girl thought noo. She doesn’t know me. *I* know my body and what all it can handle.”

“Was it his?”

I nodded. 

“That is *so* messed up! Did you tell him?”

Afrika didn’t know and that was a whole nother subject entirely. I shook my head.

“Must have slipped my mind.”

I muttered. Then quickly changed the subject.

“This is my bathroom. I wanted something relaxing so I went tropical for this room.”

I pointed out the birds of paradise flowers on the counters and tall vases on the floor and surrounding my jacuzzi. 

“There’s another bedroom on this floor.”

I opened the door to the empty room and closed it quickly. It was where the baby’s room would have been. I hadn’t done anything to it because, at the time, I was still just trying to deal with the thought that I was gonna be somebody’s mother. Truthfully, I was a little freaked. It wasn’t the first time I’d gotten pregnant by Blaze, but the more I thought about it the more I’d decided to keep this one and raise it the best way I knew how. Not that I’d had a lot to go on how to be a good mother, but I’d heard parents say that there’s no guidebook. You just sort of figure it out as you go. I opened another door at the end of the hall that led to the attic.

“This is my movie room.”

It had a theatre size screen and movie chairs. There was even a little concession stand in the back. Then I opened another door.

“And this *was* a bedroom but I turned it into my office and decorated in black and white Steampunk style.”

“THAT’S HOT!”

She took in all the mechanical clocks on the wall and the antique typewriter sitting on the desk. Also, on the desk sat a projector that was shaped like gears. There was also a guitar sculpture made of gears. On my desk sat an animated, steam, clock. I saw her looking at one of the portraits. It was of me in top hat and a fancy, long, tailed, jacket with different patterns with a gun in my hand. But the cool thing about the picture was half of my face looked real and half looked machine-like. 

“A fan sent that to me."

I said proudly. We had *the* coolest fans!

“There are two more bedrooms downstairs. One I just use as a home studio. You can take the other.”

I helped her bring her (hair) stuff in. I told her if she needed something to sleep in she could borrow something of mine or we could hit up the mall or Target. I kinda felt bad that I’d rushed her into this trip. 

“I think you have a message.”

I hit play on my answering machine.

“Caryn doll this is Jaime. Can we meet for dinner tonight? I have some very good news. Call me.”

“Whose Jaime?’

Afrika motioned for me to have a seat in one of the chairs out on the deck and she got right to braiding.

“I know what I wanna do. Don’t worry girl. You gone SLAY that shit when I’m done! HELL YEAH!”

“Jamie is my agent. She’s from *here*. We actually went to school together.”

“Ok.”

“You know I have to stay true to my roots and hook my people up.”

“I feel you on that. Too many people get a lil something and they act like they too good to give back or they forget where they ass come from. I admire that about you. You *always* down and you always *real*.”

“Well, I try.”

I flipped on the television, I’d set up outside to a music channel, started the fireplace, and let her do her thang in peace. I saw some purple hair fall but she just said 

“Trust me.”

So, I closed my eyes. Afrika is an AMAZING stylist! She’s one of the quickest braiders and sewers I know. Where it would have taken someone else half the day, she’s finished me up in a couple of hours. She handed me the mirror and… Instead of seeing purple streaks mixed in with the other hair, my whole head was purple.

“See, I told you (you) was gonna look HOT!”

I stared at myself. It wasn’t a bad look. It was just I wasn’t expecting her to do my whole head purple. I was trying to decide what I thought about it.

“I know you told me you wanted a color that matched your own and if you don’t like it I can do it over, but this is what’s in right now. Everyone’s wearing colors and the color looks good on you girl. It complements your skin tone.”

I guess she took my silence for I hated it because she quickly said.

“I’ll take it down.”

She reached for the scissors.

“No. It’s different but it’ll grow on me. Besides we can’t be afraid to try something new right?”

Afrika smiled and started to brush up the stray hairs that had fallen on the floor. She passed me a bottle from her bag of leave-in conditioner and spray in case the weave started to itch. Which it kind of was. She'd done it TIGHT. But she assured me.

"It'll stop."

Then she sprayed my head all over with an oil sheen. Which did help somewhat. 

“Well, I guess I’d better find out where we’re meeting up for dinner tonight and head out. Are you coming with me?”

“I would but I still have my own head to do. I think I’m gonna do that, eat the rest of these wings, get in the shower, and rest for a lil.”

I understood. She had done the majority of the driving. Jaime and I decided to meet at Red Lobster. It was *her* favorite restaurant. As I got out and slammed the door, a memory surfaced. 

“You look nice!”

I told her after we’d been seated. Diane always could turn heads. Now was no exception. She was wearing the hell out of a long, blue, dress (that fit her curve for curve) and sandals. Cleaned up, her skin had a radiant glow like pearls and her makeup was done to perfection. I’d even paid to treat her to the spa and to get her hair and nails done since today was special.

“Thank you, baby! I guess your mama still got it.”

She laughed as a man walked by, said hi, and stared just a little bit too long. I remembered how good it felt to see her like this again. Vibrant and full of energy. Her dark eyes sparkled set off by the sassy cut she now wore with the blond streaks. Her eyes carefully lined and smoky.

“You can order whatever you want. I got it.”

I told her as a waiter introduced himself and handed us menus. She studied hers for a second and then said.

“I think we should get the sampler and share. What do you think? Does that sound good?”

She looked at me eagerly awaiting my approval. I nodded.

“Then I think I’ll have the lobster tail with a baked potato. If that’s ok?’

She asked cautiously. 

“It’s ok. It’s your birthday.”

I’d been saving the money I made from DJ’ing at the Platinum on the weekends. Kenneth had even pulled some strings and gotten me a part-time job as a receptionist in his office.

“But the Ultimate Feast has some of *everything*.”

She mused. In the end, she’d gone with that. I just got the shrimp scampi. We’d each share each other's food. We handed the waiter our menus.

“Oh *GOD* I can not *wait* to dig into this food! I haven’t had food like this since Joe’s in Vegas. Do you remember that place?”

I shook my head. I’d always told interviewers that I’d grown up in Birmingham Alabama (which was the truth). I’d lived here since I was 10. But I wasn’t born in Birmingham. I was born in and spent a lot of my earlier years in Los Vegas. She sighed and leaned back in her seat.

“God, I miss those days! These little hot girls today think they’re doing something showing off their tits and asses in these clubs and videos.”

She shook her head.

“What we did was *classy*! It wasn’t all about just twerking and shaking your ass. When I was a showgirl, they actually made us take *real* dance classes. We were required to take ballet and dance classes. I trained *HARD*! Not only did I have to train and do multiple shows at night, but I also had to work in the casino. I’d wake up, have a late breakfast, go to dance class around 8, then I’d clock in and start my shift. I’d have about an hour to change and get ready for the performance that night of whatever show I was in. I was practically living out of my car. I was always changing from one event to the next. But GOD I loved the rush!”

She kinda gave me a half-smile and said fondly.

“I remember when you were about 3. You were watching me get ready in my sparkly outfit and my hair pinned up and you said “You look, beautiful mama! I wanna be a dancing girl like you when I grow up.”

She squeezed my hand.

“I saw you at some of those events. I bet you didn’t think I cared, but I was there. And I couldn’t have been more proud. I thought that’s MY baby out there showing out! She got that from her mama!”

I was a little taken aback by that. She was *there* at the events my dance team had in the city? She nodded.

“I have something, I need to tell you.”

She’d reached out and squeezed my hand.

“And there’s something I need to tell you.”

“You don’t.”

I started.

“No, I think I do.”

She insisted and stared into my eyes.

“I know I haven’t been the best mother. When I think about some of the things, I’ve done to you and the things I’ve said to you I’m ashamed of myself. I could blame the drugs and the alcohol, but that’s no excuse. You were the only one trying to watch out for me, and all I could see was resent. I understand why you wanted that man to be your father. I could never give you a proper one. And he’s done more for you than I ever could. I was jealous baby. Extremely jealous! I knew I wasn’t doing right by you, but I didn’t want you to leave either. I wanted to have my cake and eat it too when I should have been thinking about what was best for *you*. I see that now. But I want you to know your happiness is all that matters, and I’m trying to do better. I’ve been clean now for 3 months and I’m going to rehab.”

“That’s good mama.”

“And I’d like you to come to rehab with me sometimes. I know that I have a long way to go, but I could use the encouragement.”

“I’d like to, but I’m not going to be here much longer.”

She almost choked on her drink.

“Oh GOD! Is it drugs? This is *all* my fault. It was being around me and watching me that got you hooked wasn’t it?”

I snorted to myself. Just the opposite. As crazy as it made her, I never even so much as wanted to touch the stuff. 

“No, it’s not that.”

“Oh, thank god! But wait is you sick? Cause if it’s that we can talk to … your father.”

She struggled to say the word.

“He’s a doctor, isn’t he? We can get you treatments. I can go back to work. I’m not even sure what I’m qualified to do, but I can find something. I can see if they have any positions open here if I need to. Oh GOD, my baby is DYING!”

Diane always tended to be on the dramatic side.

“Ma, no. It’s not that either.”

“Girl if you don’t tell me something.”

“Do you remember my friend Shereece?”

She looked like she was trying to remember. 

“Kenneth’s daughter.”

“Sorta. I don’t think I ever formally had a conversation with her.”  
t  
I wasn’t surprised by that. She was probably too out of it to remember I’d brought her around the apartment a time or two.

“Well, she and I and her cousin gave a performance at this club in Atlanta.”

Her eyes light up.

“A performance! You did! You didn’t tell me!”

I removed my phone from my purse and showed her the recording Dad had sent me. She got quiet and watched intently as the video played. I could just see in her eyes she was seeing herself on stage all those years ago. She stayed very still until it was over and handed the phone back to me. She sipped her drink. I remember waiting nervously for her to speak. But then her face broke out in a big grin.

“Baby why didn’t you tell me about this? You were amazing? Did you choreograph the dance moves?”

“I also did the lyrics of the songs.”

“And the clothes?”

“That was Lucinda. Shereece's cousin. She's *really* good!"

“I would have loved to be there! Well, I guess I can see why you didn’t tell me. You probably didn’t want me showing up there loud, strung out, and embarrassing you.”

Pretty much. But I actually felt a little guilty that I hadn’t, seeing that she really wanted to be there. I admitted.

“I didn’t think you want to.”

The last time we’d spoken hadn’t been on the best terms. She sighed.

“I know and I’m sorry! I know I keep saying that but I really am. But you all were incredible! You put on quite the show!”

“Jerrica Benton invited us to sign with Starlight Music, and well we all accepted. We’ll be moving to LA by the end of the month.”

“And who is this Jerrica Benton? I’ve never heard of her.”

All of a sudden, her voice turned stern.

“Starlight Music is one of the top, recording, labels in LA. Jerrica and her sister’s Kimber own the company.”

“I see.”

She took a sip of her coke. 

“Is there a problem with that?”

“It really isn’t my place to say. You can make your own decisions now. You’re an adult.”

Well, true but I wasn’t expecting her 360 turn of attitude.

“I really wish they would hurry up with that food.”

She snapped. 

“What?”

I asked.

“Nothing. I have not eaten all day. I’d just like to be feed.”

“Not that.”

I *hated* it when people told me nothing and it was something. I’d much rather know what was on a person’s mind. Even if it was something I didn't like.

“Tell me. I was hoping this would be a *happy* occasion.”

“It’s not like I’m not happy for you. I am.”

“Ok.”

“But I’m just .. Caryn you’ve never been around people in the entertainment industry. You don’t know how ruthless they are and how they take advantage. I’ve been in that world. I *know* what they do. You can’t trust them. My life wasn’t all glitz and glamor when I was a showgirl. Some of those show producers.”

She shuddered.

“They were filthy bastards! They tried to cheat us out of the money they owed us for shows. They tried to have their way with us backstage when they thought they could. To them, we were nothing but glorified strippers. I just don’t want that for you baby! I don’t want you to end up like my friend Jessica.”

Her dark eyes became stormy, hard, and cold. All traces were gone now of the joy reflected in them before.

My mind snapped back as Jaime greeted me at the door and gave me a kiss on the cheek. 

“Caryn doll! You look stunning! Girl, you are *working* that hair! You have to tell me who did it.”

She said as we were seated. 

“I invited her, but she was tired from the drive. But I can give you her contact information.”

I reached in my purse and slid her one of Afrika’s cards. She sighed.

“I need something done to this head of mine. Last night I straightened it for two hours straight, now it's all frizzed up again."

After drinks and appetizers were ordered, she got right to the news.

“Well, first of all, I wanted to get it straight for the source. I’ve heard rumors in these streets that you ladies won’t be continuing on as Eye Candy.”

“True!”

“Wow! Girl! I’m so sorry! Can you tell me what happened or?”

“It’s really not as bad as all that. No ones gotten into a fight and threatened to leave. It didn’t have anything to do with management or us going bankrupt. It’s just we’ve all worked together for a long time and I think we all just need a break. Just look at it like a hiatus. I think right now we’re all kind of just dealing with life stuff.”

“I feel you! Well, I hope you all work it out. I’m rooting for all of you ladies. If any of you ever need anything I'm just a call away. We go *way* back!"

I laughed a little.

“Yeah, we do!”

Jaime and I had played together on the girl's basketball team at Ramsey during junior year.

“Well I think this will definitely make you happy, and it will make it a little easier now that you aren’t doing music. I was contacted by 2 movie studies that want you to read for 2 roles I think that you’ll be absolutely perfect for! The first is Disney’s live version movie for The Princess and the Frog as Tiana. A lot of it will be shot on location in New Orleans. Shooting for this will begin next year but I really think this could be a great opportunity to not just appeal to Eye Candy’s young adult and teen audience but younger girls as well who didn’t grow up with the cartoon. They'ill get the see the first black, live, representation of a Disney princess.”

“Sounds good.”

I nodded.

“And the second is a newer series of books that fall into the fantasy genre. The plotline is a girl from an African tribe of diviners who goes on a journey with her brother and a member of the royal family (the princess) on a quest to bring back magic.”

She reached into her tote and handed me two books.

“These are for you!. Read them over and let me know what you think. I think you’d be amazing in the lead role for the main character. She’s strong, independent, feisty, ferocious! She’s a warrior! think you are going to fall in love with the series! I already read the first two books and can’t wait until the third comes out. Since the story takes place on fictional African grounds there’s a good chance that’s where the movie will be filmed. There haven’t been many details yet, but as I find more out I’ll reach out.”

Both opportunities sounded really good! I could see myself playing either or both roles. I told her I would read the books and she promised she would give me the details of when the auditions would be held. 

After business was discussed, I listened as Jaimee babbled away about the proposal she’d gotten the night before, and plans for her wedding. She went on and on about the amazing new love in her life. I was happy for her, but after a while, I started to feel slightly empty. After what had happened to me in that room, not only did I wonder if I could ever trust anyone enough to say I loved them again, but for that matter, if anyone would ever love me enough to want to spend the rest of their lives with me. 

Then I thought about Cinda’s proposal. Cinda would make such a beautiful bride! She really was lucky! Ro was a great guy. We’d produced some tracks for some of the Starlight artists. I needed to call her and tell her congrats. Maybe, we could celebrate after the fashion show (for both of us). It was a pretty special day for me too.

After we finished dinner it was after 9:00. I hugged Jaime congratulated her again, and told her to call me. Then I ordered a to-go-box. I got in my car and 30 minutes later was pulling off the interstate and headed toward my old stomping grounds (Westend).

Westend was the rough area, which was said to be were all the gang members, drug dealers, and criminals stayed. For a while, I’d attended Westend High before I went to Ramsey. I did finish the 9th-grade year there, but I stayed getting into it at that school. My mouth got me in so much trouble, that I’m actually surprised that I made it out of there without getting myself beat or stabbed to death, or *killed*. If Diane hadn’t gotten me out of there, I probably would have been. I guess the man upstairs had other plans for my life.

I shivered slightly as I drove past the high school and tried to block out the shadows. I saw a girl only 13 years old with a Raiders cap (turned to the back) and jacket. She wore ripped jeans and had attitude for days. I heard her hiss to another one of her classmates.

“Come over here. I just wanna hola at cho a minute.”

I felt her grab the girl by the arm and walk her away from the school so no teacher’s eyes could see. 

“I just want to talk to you about where you got that necklace. Dat's nice! Lemme see it!"

“Thanks, my boyfriend.”

Then I felt her snap and yank the chain quickly from the girl’s neck. I saw the girl getting mad and shove her.

“Bitch! I don’t know who you think you are, but you better...”

I saw the girl shove her into a tree so it looked like they were just talking, but I felt her quickly pulling something sharp and silver from her jacket. She hissed holding the pointed end low enough so no one would see but close enough that it could puncture the girl's abdomen.

“Or you’ll what?”

Sometimes it’s hard to believe I’d ever been that person. The memories left a cold sensation. Was this the reason why what had happened to me happened? I felt my eyes mist up a little. I’d been no better than Blaze. How many times had I seen him threaten (and hurt) either the women he was fucking around with or guys that he thought were trying to play him?

No, I told myself. That is *not* who you are anymore! You’ve touched the lives or so many in a *positive* way. You’ve even *anonymously* donated money to that school. But deep down, it still didn’t sit right with me all those faces long forgotten of the people I’d pulled a knife on or gotten into a fight with if I felt they’d even looked at me wrong. I had *so* much ANGER! Just *constantly* If I could just find those people today and apologize. All the shadows seemed to rush past my car as I thought about each one. I could have killed one of them. I actually had pierced a couple with my blade. If I could pay back the items I’d taken. But I knew that was impossible as some of them I didn’t even know their names.

I pulled up to the West Carlton Apartments just as another car pulled in at the same time. I turned off my car and just had to sit there a moment because this whole area was bringing back things I thought I’d buried a long time ago. But now I felt shaky. I’d done it, I’d gotten out of West End. I kept saying trying to convince myself. That's not who I am! But just sitting here it felt like I’d never left. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves.

Instead, I trained my eyes on the apartment on the side of me. Why the hell was she still *here* I asked myself in silent frustration? I could have helped her find another place. But it’s like this place had some kind of hold over her. Suddenly anger took over,r and I got out and slammed the door. I wish I would have had a lighter on me. Well no because I would have lit this whole damn apartment up and blazed it to the fucking ground!

I stomped my way up the steps, walking past a younger version of me as I did.

“Mama, let me go! Your hurting me!”

I wailed as she drug me up those same steps by my hair.

“Not until you tell me where you hide them. I KNOW U HIDE THEM!”

She screeched.

“I didn’t hide anything from you!”

I yelled as she slung me into the apartment and started tossing things around hysterically.

“I KNOW U HIDE THEM FROM ME! Tell me where they are.”

She continued her tyrant and ripped the pillows off the couch and then snatched up a pair of scissors and started to tear through the stuffing in the coach and the pillows. She screamed in frustration and after not having success in that room, headed toward the kitchen. She started opening cabinets and tossing pots and pans and plates and glasses on the floor growing more and more beserk by the minute.

“You little bitch! I know you hide them. Did you take them? Did you *take* them."

She then snatched me up by the arm. She still had the scissors in her hand. She said with a wild, crazed, look in her eyes.

“TELL ME! TELL ME OR ILL CUT THEM OUT OF YOU!"

Then I saw clumps of my hair falling to the floor. I stuck my old key in the door and turned the lock. I heard me telling Reece and Cinda in the past.

“I need to talk to you guys about something. I need to go back home. I got a call this morning. My mom’s been arrested again!”

I flipped the light switch, but the lights didn’t come on. That meant she hadn’t paid the electricity bill again. Nor had she paid the heat. It was colder in here than it was out there.

“Diane. Are you here? It’s just me Caryn.”

Silence! I walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. It reeked like nobody’s business in here. There wasn’t much in it but some coronas. Whatever else was in there was spoiled and soured beyond belief. I opened the cabinet to find a trash bag so I could dump everything in the trash. There might still be time to stop by the store tonight. Well, tomorrow. I forgot where I was. Nothing in Birmingham stayed open past 9:00 pm. I called out.

“I brought you back some dinner for Red Lobster. I’ll be in town for the weekend and I wanted to make sure you were ok.”

Still no answer. I sat the food on the table. I continued talking.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call first. I know you hate that, but I just wanted to surprise you. You remember Bianca, right? She was Kenneth’s wife. Well, there’s this fashion show tomorrow. I thought you might wanna go. I’m gonna be in but we can do something together afterward. We can go out to eat. You can choose.”

Nothing.

“Or we can do something else.”

I heard myself telling Cinda and Reece as I looked around the place that actually hadn’t looked much more different than it did right now.

“Home sweet home. I would offer you something but unless you’d like water or liquor.”

“I’ll take the liquor.”

Reece said as if she needed to be drunk to spend another minute here, reminding me of why I’d only brought here there a couple of times when we were in high school.  
‘  
How do you live like this?”

I thought as I did what I could to wipe down the counters and spray because I heard distinctive rustling come from either the cabinet or behind the refrigerator. I wasn’t even here a good 5 minutes and I was tempted to leave the food there and tell her I’d talk to her later and dip. But intuition told me not to. Being back here and this cramped apartment was bringing back the depression I used to feel back then. Then it hit me. Maybe she wasn’t speaking to me again. I sighed.

“I know it’s been a few months since we talked. I’m sorry. I’ve had a lot going on. Can you just talk to me, please? I don’t need you to be mad at me. Mama, something bad happened to me.”

Maybe she was sleep. I moved into the small, hallway. I knocked on the door to the bathroom and then pushed it open. The smell was stronger back here. A bad feeling was starting to settle in my stomach. I opened the door to my old room. Amazingly there wasn’t even a bed there. All the furniture was gone. 

“Diane!”

I called a little more loudly. I knocked on her door and waited until I heard her snap at me for interrupting her while she was “entertaining”. Nothing so I pushed the door open. Immediately I saw where the source of the smell had come from. There was my mother slumped over on the floor, half-dressed, with a needle sticking out of her arm, eyes glazed over. There was no telling how long she’d been like this. Days? Weeks? There was no need to check for a pulse. I already knew. Maybe subconsciously I'd known all along and that's what had brought me over here in the first place.

“SHIT!”

I yelled as I took out my cell phone.

“911 how may I direct your call?”

“I need an ambulance. I think my.. mother OD’ed.”

I said numbly.

“We got the address. We’ll send someone right over.”

I closed her door and slid to the floor in the hallway. DAMN IT DIANE! I didn’t know who I was madder at. Her for throwing her life away and not being able to fight the addiction or me for being so wrapped up in my own life I hadn’t checked in with her and she’d fallen off again. Just then I heard a knock at the door. Damn! That was quick. I thew open the door and found on the other side.

“Andy.”

I said in surprise.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenneth is talking to Tasha when all of a sudden he's approached by a beautiful woman who is a carbon copy of his ex-wife Bianca. He accepts her invitation to dance, and the two become acquainted. Rhianna is about to invite him to interview for a spot in the Birmingham News. when a commotion occurs. He rushes over to find Lucinda unconscious.

Kenneth  
You Remind Me Of A Girl That I Once Knew (See Her Face Whenever I Look At You)  
I heard the faint sounds of music coming from my daughter’s room and knocked on the door.

“Deception! My life feels like its nothing but deception. A big charade. Deception. It’s time to put an end to this deception. But I’m afraid. I never meant to lie to you. I swear it! I never meant to play those games. Sometimes I wanna cry to you, but I can’t bear it. I fear our love will end in vain.”

I knocked again, softly.

“Come in.”

I heard a barely audible voice say. I pushed open the door slowly. My daughter hadn’t gotten up and hadn’t gotten dressed. She was laying there staring at the ceiling. She hit mute on the television but didn’t look at me directly. I knew she’d rather die than admit it to anyone that she still watched that cartoon, but I know it was one of her comfort zones. On further look,  
her eyes looked puffy and her face tear-stained. My wife had told me she really hadn’t come out of her room all weekend. I pulled up a chair beside her bed. She barely moved. Just closed her eyes.

“Come on, sweetheart. You have to get up. It’s time to go to school. I can take you and we can stop on the way and get some McGriddles. I’ll write you an excuse.”

“Daddy! I’m not going to school today. I’m in a lot of pain! I can’t move.”

She said her voice thick with tears that she didn’t try to stop from spilling out of her eyes. Ok, this wasn’t good. It’s rare I’d seen her cry over any time pain that had to do with being sick.

“What’s the matter? Can you tell me what hurts?”

More tears fell down her face.

“It hurts all over! It hurts to move! It hurts to talk. I just want to rest.”

I reached over and put my hand on her forehead. She didn’t have a fever. Actually, her skin felt kind of clammy.

“Is it cramps?”

I asked. I doubted that it would be because while I’d heard her complain about them a time or two, they’d never been so bad to the point they got her like *this*. Still, I couldn’t rule the possibility out either. She moved her head slightly to indicate it wasn’t.

“Did you eat something that wasn’t right?”

I put my hand on her tummy slightly and her face winced up in pain. Did she have appendicitis? She repeatedly tiredly.

“I need to rest, Daddy.”

I picked up the cordless phone on her night table.

“I’m calling the ambulance.”

“No Daddy. Please! I just need to rest.”

She begged.

“Young lady give me one good reason why I shouldn’t. You can’t tell me anything but your laying here looking like your about to pass out. You are gonna have to tell me *something*.”

“Daddy Please don’t make me go to school today. I’m hurting and I don’t wanna see *anybody*.”

“You don’t wanna see anybody. Anybody like who?”

She got quiet.

“I just don’t.”

“Did you and your friends have a fight?”

I doubted this too. My daughter definitely was *not* the crying over friend’s type. She was more the “PSH, I don’t need you no way” type.

“Did you and Caryn have a fight?”

I was about to go to Caryn’s room and ask what was going on. Although, I didn’t expect to get much out of her either. It was like that sometimes when you had teenage daughters. You’d have more luck breaching Fort Knox if a teenage girl didn’t want you to know something. That was *it*.

“Oh. I get it. You don’t want to go to school because you don’t want to see *Harlem*. Did the two of you have a fight?”

They’d fallen out before on and off, but usually, in some days they were back together again. She’d break it off with him, not talk to him a few days, and then he’d apologize (or buy her something she wanted) and they’d be right back all over each other. She was *crazy* about that boy. I’d never seen my daughter care that much about *anyone* and I just knew that one day she’d be telling me she was engaged. Oh, GOD! A bad thought had hit my gut. She’s pregnant. Ok, I can handle this! I tried to prepare myself mentally. You’re a doctor. The most important part is if she’s okay and if the baby’s ok. Then we can work from there. Bianca was gonna hit the ceiling! I had to be the calm one. I said softly.

“Hey. You can talk to me. It’s ok. Whatever it is.”

I touched her arm lightly and moved over to sit by her in the bed. For a minute I just let her cry. I reached over and pulled a couple of tissues from the box by the bed and dried her face. This was definitely one of the *worse* parts of fatherhood. My baby was in some kind of pain and I was supposed to be the one to protect her from stuff like this. What was all that time in school for and the degrees if I couldn’t *fix* whatever this was? I knew I couldn’t *fix* everything she went through, but I could damn sure try to eliminate some of em.

“I don’t wanna see him anymore.” 

So, it *was* him. What had that boy done? I would kill him my *damn* self if he’d fucked around and broke my daughter’s heart. I closed my eyes. 

“It’s gonna come back to you one day Kenneth. It’s gonna bite you in the ass. One day someone’s gonna do you or your daughter the same damn way!” 

I heard my mama’s voice all to clear in my head as she watched me waltz my butt out the door getting ready for my 2nd date that day while in college dating 2 different women at the same time. I felt my eyes flash and my insides heat up.

“Where’s your cell phone? Gimme his number.”

What he wasn’t gonna do was have my daughter lying here crying her damn eyes out. I’d always liked Harlem. He’d always been decent. Respectable. He was always polite to us. He was an excellent student. Amazing athlete. He didn’t wear his pants hanging off his ass like some of the little thugs she thought were fine and had tried to sneak out to see at the mall or movies that she thought we didn’t know about. He always brought her back on time, and from what I knew, he didn’t smoke weed (that I knew of). I remember when she’d flat out told me she was gonna sleep with him. I *thought* I’d *persuaded* him against it. He’d sat there and lied to me right in my face.

“Mr. Jamison, I’d never do anything to hurt your daughter. I love her!”

He’d told me.

“I want to marry her one day. Not *right* now.”

He cleared up.

“I’m gonna finish law school first. I wanna be able to take care of her.”

"Are you having sex with my daughter?"

I straight out asked. 

"No sir. I respect your daughter and I'm not in a rush. I can wait until the right time. I'll wait as long as I have to for her."

Then another bad thought hit me. She said she was hurting all over. Had they gotten into a physical fight? I know my daughter isn’t an angel by any stretch. I have personally seen how she can get in her moods and push and push and push that boy until he went off. But if he put his hands on her in any way. I examined the parts of her I could see. Her face was swollen and puffy, but it didn’t appear to be bruised in any way I could see. Neither did her arms. Other than the markings of her tattoo, I didn’t see anything to raise any concerns. Unless the marks were under her clothes like abdomen or ribs. 

“Mela.”

I said softly, using her childhood nickname. “Mela” because she’d come to us when she was 2 years old, clothes all sticky and juice running all down her face. She couldn’t quite pronounce the word watermelon. 

“Mela!”

She’d exclaimed as a way of telling me she’d wanted another piece. She’d looked so cute that even though she’d gotten it everywhere, I picked her up, kissed her, and called her “my little mela”. Of course, she’d roll her eyes those days if I used it and threaten to get me back if I ever called her that in public.

“Whatever you tell me is between me and you. It stays *here*. You know I got you. But you have to tell me. Please. Did Harlem do anything physical to hurt you?”

She just shut her eyes and rolled over on her side, facing the wall and putting a wall between us. I just stared at her for a minute with my eyes stinging. FINE! I thought. If she didn’t want to give me the number. I would get it myself. I shut her door and opened the guest room next to it, that I’d turned into a room for Caryn in case she ever wanted to stay the night. At this point, she was spending most nights here, anyway. She wasn’t there. So, I headed down the steps. I walked right past my wife who was in the kitchen attempting French toast. I threw a drawer open with more force than necessary and shuffled through the junk drawer trying to find one of those big, old, yellow pages I know we used to have.

“What in the world is wrong with you Kenneth carrying on like that? Is all that really necessary?”

“Where is Caryn?”

I asked. She sighed as she tightened the belt on her silk robe.

“ The hell if I know. I have not seen her. Why? Are you angry with her?”

She asked hopefully. Her eyes lit up.

“What did she do to piss you off? Did you take something of yours? I told you that girl could not be trusted, Kenneth. There is just something in her eyes. I do not know why you do not see.”

“It’s not Caryn.”

I mumbled.

“Oh.”

She said disappointedly.

“And tell that girl to get her behind down those stairs and eat. She is already late as it is. They would not have stood for this at the school I attended in Paris. If I were late to classes for any reason, I could expect punishment there and at home. You are too light on her. I have always said. SHEREECE! GET DOWN HERE RIGHT THIS MOMENT! DO NOT MAKE ME COME UP THERE AND SNATCH YOU UP!”

She yelled at the top of her lungs.

“That girl she loves to try me. I am not in the mood for “the diva” this morning!”  
  
“Do we have Harlem’s number?”

She looked thoughtful.

“I think I may have it in my address book upstairs. SHERREECE! Why do you need his number?”

“You can stop yelling her name. I don’t think she’s coming down.”

“Oh she’s coming down alright or I am going to put my belt to her.”

I stood in front of her to block her from going any further.

‘Wait! Ok. I think they’re something wrong with her.”

Bianca raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms.

“I don’t know exactly what. She wouldn’t tell me but she’s in a lot of pain."

“Pain!”

She burst out laughing.

“Oh, she does not know the meaning of *pain*. I will give her pain if she DOES NOT GET DOWN HERE! Kenneth, I swear. You can be *so* naïve. There is nothing wrong with that girl. She just does not want to go to school. She probably has a test that she hasn’t studied for or an assignment she stayed out all night and forgot to do.”

“I’m serious. I touched her arm slightly, and she winced like I’d burned her. I think we need to call the ambulance. She told me not to but...”

I dropped my voice.

“I think it might have something to do with Harlem. I think.”

It was so hard to say this. I paused.

“I think she might be pregnant.”

Bianca got quiet for a moment, then I saw something register in her eyes. She shook her head and mumbled.

“No, she is not pregnant. At least not anymore.”

She looked into my eyes and for a minute it took me a minute to catch on. Then it hit me. OH! Bianca simply nodded, sighed, and then headed toward the stairs to go up and talk to Shereece. Now, I sat at here with that same icy feeling in my gut when I thought she was pregnant. I’d been half-right. That guy at the bar serving the drinks. He had the same eyes. He had the same face. But how was that possible? A lot of men probably had light eyes. I had light eyes. But the same *face*? But they did say everyone had a clone.

I thought. Well, we’d never really *had* the conversation. After Bianca had gone up and talked to her, I thought the matter had faded. I mean, I did what I could. I let her know I was there. I’d let her take the rest of the week off and went to get her assignments. I’d brought her all her favorite things to eat. Sometimes, I just sat on the bed with her and watched television with neither of us saying anything. If we did talk, it was to talk about whatever reality tv show she wanted to watch. But I *could* not get over it, I thought as I glanced through the crowd toward the bar again. I only got occasional glimpses through the crowd as the club was filling up.

Bianca. I knew she got around but had she fathered a child with another man on me right here in *Bham*. She’d told me that after our daughter she was having a hysterectomy I’d wanted other kids, but I knew that if I had any prayer of having sex with her again, then I didn’t have much of a choice. I’d even taken her to get it. Or had she lied to me? Could *we* have had another one that she wanted to get rid of but instead had given it up for adoption? So many questions.

Or maybe this young man just shared similar traits with us. Yes, Kenneth, that’s all it is. I told myself. Sometimes you have a tendency to overreact. I felt something vibrating but it wasn’t my work pager. It was my regular phone. It was a text from my boy Keith.

It sounded urgent. He said he *really* needed to talk to me. Probably something no doubt having to do with his wife again messing around behind his back. I told him to meet come meet me here. He told me he'd change and be on his way. I was wondering what was about to go down now when my granddaughter came and sat down next to me.

First, she started asking me about clubbing in general and did I go a lot. I told her occasionally. Tho not as much as I did when I was younger. I told her every so often, I’d come through with my frat brothers on special nights. Then she wanted to know if I took Kim. I told her I did and named some other places we liked to go together. She wanted to know if I missed her. I told her honestly that I always did when she wasn’t with me, but I wouldn’t be anywhere else but here with my other favorite ladies in the world. She asked me did the music bothered me. I had to laugh to myself at that one. It seemed like just yesterday I was rapping along with some of the same type of lyrics with my boys. I told her it did and didn’t. I’d outgrown the more explicit stuff. What these young cats were rapping about I’d seen and done sexually. Then she got down to the *REAL* with me. I knew it was building up to this.

“Paw Paw.”

I sat my glass down and gave her my full, undivided.

“I wanna stay here with you.”

She stared me in the eyes seriously and waited for my reaction.

“And I’d *love* for you to stay here with me. You’ve become very special to me in the past few days.”

That little girl had really done a number on me. I did not expect to fall for her as hard I did. Well, they always *did* say I had a soft spot for pretty ladies.

“Then we can go after the show. We can go get my stuff at Haven House. I’ll be good. I swear. I mean, I promise. I’ll make good grades. I won’t get in any trouble. I’ll work. I won’t take anything or ask either of you for any money. I’ll be quiet.”

She pleaded with me. She looked like she was that close to getting on her knees and begging me. It honestly made my heartbreak because if I could, I’d drive to Haven House *tonight* and go get her stuff.

“You know I don’t care about that. I know you’ll make good grades and the money isn’t an issue with me. But sweetheart if you want that you're going to have to talk to your parents and tell them that’s what you want to do. We can’t just *take* you. That’s *kidnapping* We could get into a lot of trouble. Not only with Haven House and your parents but the legal system if we just.”

“But I haven’t seen them in over a year. It’s better for them too if I came out here and just left.”

I took a sip of my Long, Island, Ice, Tea, and sat down my glass slowly. There was *so* much desperation in her eyes and her voice. That feeling was starting to creep again that maybe this shelter wasn’t all on the level. What or who was she trying so hard to get away from. After what happened earlier that night, I’d made a mental note to investigate a little deeper. Maybe make a phone call and ask to speak to the person in charge. Maybe even take a drive there to find out a little more about this place and its credentials so I could check and see for my own peace of mind what kind of people lived there. While they were getting dressed I’d pulled up the site and saw the name of a Giselle Dvorak listed. There was a number listed and an email address so I’d sent a brief email introducing myself and saying that when she had a minute if she didn’t mind answering some questions or speaking with me. I was still waiting for her to respond.

“You know I’d do anything in my power to help you, but Tasha, you have to be honest with me. Did something happen to you back at Haven House? Did one of the men there try to hurt you or...?”

“No. Not *them* My uncle.”

OH, so this was about a relative. The pieces slowly start to fit together in my head.

“Oh. I get it. Your uncle is the reason your *at* Haven House. You ran away to get away from *him*.”

She nodded. DAMN IT! Another one of *those* sorry ass mutha’s. What the hell is WRONG with these men today?! There *really* needed to be a worldwide purge. Where the man above decided it was time for another catastrophe that wiped out all these assholes of the face of the earth. I still hadn’t had a chance to deal with the first bomb dropped on me (although that situation seemed to be taken care of). Now days later here I was dealing with yet *another* son of a bitch that had done damage to one of the women in my life. I *really* was not trying to bring out the HAM in me, but it looked like I was gonna have to take it there. It had been *soooo* long since I’d let that side out.

“He had my friend killed. He didn’t know I know. But I knew it was him.”

I took another sip of my drink to calm my nerves. It took nothing for me to get hype and I really needed to keep a cool head. She didn’t need to see that.

“And you think he’ll do the same to you.”

I dropped the tone of my voice low. As I looked at her my mind just couldn’t perceive that anyone could ever hurt such a beautiful, special, little girl. Much less try to *kill* her. I’d lost a friend once to the streets and being gunned down to so I knew how hard it was to carry that pain and have it feel like it was eating you *up* on the inside.  
“I had him locked up, but I think he’s going to get out soon. I can feel it. He’s gonna come looking for me and he won’t stop until he finds me! I didn’t say my name, but he knows. Please Paw Paw don’t make me go back there. It’s not Haven House. They never did anything to me. If he finds me there, he might hurt them too. He doesn’t care who he hurts. I just...”

“I get it now.”

I said quietly.

“Do you want me to be somewhere that’s not safe?”

“No. Of course, I don’t. Hey! I’m glad you told me. I *will* get you out. Ok. Ask my other daughter Cara. I don’t mind a fight. But we still have to have a conversation with your Mom and Dad. If you just explain it to them.”

“They won’t believe you. She won’t believe you! She’ll take his side! She’ll say I’m the one lying.”

She said hysterically. I had to get her to calm down before she got me all upset. I passed her some of her drink.

“Hey! Look at me! We’ll figure something out. We can call an emergency family meeting and get out of here. I’ll find Shereece and Cinda and we can go *home* and talk about this. But you don’t have to worry because he won’t get anywhere near you because if he does, I will kill him my damn self. But let me find them so we can figure something out I….”

“Excuse me.”

I looked up and I swear I froze. Standing in front of me was…

“Bianca.”

I mumbled. If Tasha hadn’t grabbed the cup out of my hand, I would have spilled it all over the floor. Even though I hadn’t been sipping anything I started to chock.

“Are you alright?”

The voice didn’t quite have the same soft, baby-like accent. But everything else. Even the way she wore her hair pulled back in a ball looked similar. What the HELL was going on tonight, or what the hell had they spiked my drink with? Now I *know* I needed to take my family and get the hell out of this place. Cause it was too much freakiness going on up in here. I struggled to find my voice and tried to cough until I cleared my throat. Tasha passed my drink back to me and I took a swallow. I nodded.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt. Are you two.. here together?”

“Uh no. We.. that’s my granddaughter.”

“Aww! How cute! I just wanted to ask if you wanted to dance.”

I hesitated. I wasn’t worried that my lady would be mad. She really wasn’t the jealous type. She probably would have just said, 

“Well? She asked you to dance. Didn’t your mama ever tell you it’s not polite to keep a lady waiting?” 

And she would have been just as confident as she said there sipping on a Margarita with her attention on her phone and social media pages. If she’d been there, she wouldn’t she wouldn’t have even batted an eye. If I’d told her about it and she wasn’t she’d laugh like it was the funniest thing in the world and say. 

“I hope you didn’t step on her toes with all that crazy dancing you do.” 

Then she’d say, 

“Kenneth you can be so dramatic! You danced with her ok. Dancing isn’t *cheating* you know. I am not your *warden*. I am your *partner*. You're allowed to dance with other women and have a good time when you got out with your fraternity brothers.”  
  
“I uh we were just about to get out of here.”

I learned a *loooong* time ago as a man it’s better to just stop these things before they even start. That’s how a lot of us get caught up. And this woman I could not stop staring at.

“Please! It’s my birthday. I came here alone.”

Her full, sensual, lips pouted. Ok well, one dance wouldn’t kill me would it? One dance and then I’d make up an excuse. I could suitably glance down at my pager and say someone was calling me into work, apologize, and then leave. I looked at Tasha who didn’t look happy.

“You don’t mind, do you?”Please say yes. Say you were right in the middle of talking to me about something. I feared what dancing real close with the woman would wore my wife’s face and having her  
body all pressed up against me would do to my uh raw instinct. Tasha leaned back, took her phone out, and mumbled 

“Whatever!”

*Tasha* nooo. I thought. But *she* probably thought I wanted this.

“I’ll bring him right back.”

She said sweetly, and she took my hand. I turned to her.

“I’ll be right back. I’ll make sure I can see you from where I am. I’m *right here*. If anyone comes up to you that you think doesn’t belong you have three *drinks* and three *glasses*.”

I hinted. She just nodded.

“I’ll be ok.”

So, she led me to the dance floor. The song was semi-slow. It was Crusher and Bella Mai. Don’t Waste My Time. I put my hands on her hips and she put hers around my shoulders.

“So, what’s your name handsome?”

“Kenny and yours?”

“Rhianna.”

Her name even sounded like my wife’s and I recognized the scent of Narcisse.

“So, Rhianna, what’s up with you being here all by yourself on your birthday?’

I mean what man in his right *mind* looking like she did in the short, tight dress she had on that hugged her body like a second skin would rather be with his boys or watching a game?

“I just got out of a relationship a couple of weeks ago.”

“Wow! I’m so sorry! I know how hard breakups can be.”

“It’s ok. I told him not to cross me. He’ll *never* do that again.”

She said into my arm. Oh kaaay! 

“So, why is a good-looking man like yourself out by himself tonight?”

“Actually, I’m not. I’m here with three very beautiful women. My daughter, my niece, and you meet my granddaughter.”

“You look too *way* too young to have a granddaughter.”

“Thank you!”

“So, it’s a family thing?”

“Yeah. We're pretty tight."

"I wish mine was. No one even called me today to wish me a happy birthday."

She pouted.

"Man, that's messed up tho. Well, I'll wish you one. Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday Rhianna. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday Rhianna."

I said after the song. She sighed in contentment.

"That's the nicest thing anyone's done for me all day."

"Well everyone deserves some love on their birthday. And a beautiful woman like yourself shouldn’t have to celebrate her birthday alone. How old did you turn?”

“27.” 

27? If that wasn’t a sign, I needed to take my butt home. 

“I took myself out. I treated myself to a spa and I got my nails and toes done. And I bought myself a new car.”

" I heard that. What kind of car did you get?”

I hope I wasn’t being *too* nosy. She didn’t know me like that, but she didn’t seem to mind. 

“It’s a pink Lamborghini. 2018. I had it custom made.”

“Niice! So you got it like that hunh?”

“Well, I just don’t do half-ass. If anything is worth doing it’s worth doing *thoroughly*. Maybe we can go for a ride later. I’d love to ride … out with you.”

She said seductively and I fought off the sensation of ol Ken, that I’d locked up and told myself I was *not* gonna let that guy out again. He could get a lil… And she’d just suggested she wanted to ride me. I wasn’t slow I caught that. I tried to think of a safe topic. Work. Work wasn’t sexy... Ok well... But it was a neutral enough topic.

“So, what do you do?”

“Sit with me a minute.”

Not only had the song gone off, but we’d also danced a couple of them. She led me over to the section where she sat and crossed her legs. Her section actually had balloons, flowers, champagne glasses, and a cake on the table. I stared at her as she cut a piece of the cake and handed me a piece. She caught me and blushed a little. She took out a lighter and a box of cigarettes from her purse. Are you serious, I thought in amazement. Bianca had the same habit when I first meet her. She'd smoke with she got agitated. I'd tried it but just never got hooked on it. She offered me one, but I shook my head. 

“Forgive me! You just look so much like someone I used to know. And I seem to be getting a lot of that tonight.”

“Was she someone very close to you?”

I accepted the plate.

“My ex-wife. We’re actually holding something in her memory tomorrow.”

“She passed then. “

She said in realization.

“OMG! I am *so* sorry! What happened? I mean if it’s.”

I begin to recite the events for the umpteenth time mechanically.

“No. It’s ok. It’s been almost 12 years now. She was trying to get to a photo-shot. She was a model. There were 2 accidents. On the way to the airport, it had started raining. The car slid on the road but neither she nor the driver was injured. The police suggested that she go to the hospital or either just go home but when my wife had her mind made up to do something.”

For a long time, I’d gone over it in my mind and it had made me SO ANGRY! After that first accident, she should have taken that as a sign and just come home. She didn’t need to go to that damn photo-shot that she lost her life trying to get to. Because at the time, I thought what she *needed* was right there at home. Her husband and two beautiful daughters were *there* and we all loved her. Were we all a little messed up as a family? Of course, we were, but aren’t *all* families. And I wasn’t stupid. I know it wasn’t so much a question of what she was trying so hard to get to but what she was trying to leave behind. My mind flashed back.

I walked into our bedroom and shut the door. I saw her sitting in front of the mirror with her hair pulled up in a ball examining her face carefully and frowning. I guess examining it for imperfections which was ridiculous. Her face and skin still held the same glowing, radiant, look it had the first time I’d seen her when I was in high school. Sometimes I wondered how she never seemed to age. She glanced up when she heard the door open. When she saw who it was, she said.

“I thought you were Shereece. She has been trying to convince me still to take her with me. Of all days. I have tried to get her to come to my shows and events over the years but she has turned them down. It was not like this before, but today I had to threaten her to go to school. I do not think she was happy with me when she left.”

She sighed. I just stared at my wife a moment. 

“Why are you looking at me like that? Let me guess. You think I should have taken her.”

I just wanted to look at her because in my gut I knew, I wanted to memorize the way she always wore her hair pulled up around the house, the slant of her eyes, and the light color that danced when she was happy and flashed when she was angry. I took in the full pout of her lips that I must have kissed about a thousand times since the day I’d grabbed her in Paris. I took in the long elegant curve of her neck and how it dipped down into her full breasts. At that moment, I realized that after all, we’d gone through in this marriage and all the things, she’d done to me over the years, I was still as in love with her as the day I first saw her. And it hit me. It *finally* hit me. But if she was gonna leave me, I was damn sure gonna not let her go without a fight. So, I just went for it. I crossed the room and got down on my knees in front of her. She looked at me oddly. 

“Kenneth why in the world are you on the ground like that? Did I drop.”

But that’s as far as she got. I slid the tie that was holding her robe closed open and propped one leg over my shoulder. Her eyes closed and the only thing that filled the room were moans of ecstasy. 

Hours later, she sat up and said softly.

“Well, thank you for that, but my car will be here at any moment. I have to get dressed if I’m going to make my flight.”

I saw her untangle herself from my embrace, quickly hop up, and start pulling on a pants suit that she’d placed over a chair in our room.

“Bianca.”

“Yes, Kenneth.”

“Was I really all that bad?”

“No, Kenneth you *were* not. You have been the perfect father, husband, and lover. You were better to me than I deserved.”

“Then stay.”

She laughed nervously.

“I am only going for a shoot. You are overreacting.”

“I know Bianca. I know the day you told me about it.”

She was silent, and I watched as she turned her back to me and slid her coat on.

“Please. It doesn’t have to be like this. You win!”

She paused. I’d fought her so hard. Now I was just *tired*. It wasn’t worth it anymore.

“I’ll sell the house baby. I’ll call the realtor and have them put it up. Shereece is close to finishing.”

“You would only be ripping her away from *him*”

“But she said she doesn’t want anything to do with him anymore.”

“She says that, but I think you and I both know that is not the case. No Kenneth, this is not the life our daughter wants. I have offered it to her numerous times. I can not do that to her. She will hate me even more than she already does. I have made enough of a mess.”

“You know that isn’t true. All she ever wanted was your attention B.”

“And Cara?”

I hesitated. At this point, the adoption wouldn’t go through for a whole nother year. I knew I couldn’t just leave her with *that woman*.

“Then I can send Mela. I’ll stay here and make sure everything gets taken care of with the house and by that time the papers would have gone through and we’ll join you. She just wants to leave this place behind, anyway.”

“Kenneth.”

She sighed heavily.

“I love you.”

I told her tenderly. Hadn’t I proved it to her? Other than the move, I’d given her everything thing all she’d wanted. I’d even let her have her other lover. Not *all* of em cause I had to put my foot down *some* where. But the one that mattered the most. 

“We will talk about this when I return.”

“Can I drive you to the airport?”

That’s when I heard a car horn honk outside.

“Goodbye, Kenneth.”

She came over to me and kissed me tenderly. As I savored her lips, I knew it would be the last time.

“She insisted she was fine and that she really needed to get to the airport. Then I got a call that said there had been another accident and her plane had crashed. No survivors.”

“OH MY GOD!”

She reached out to squeeze my hand.

“You poor thing! I can’t even imagine what that was like and what you must be going through right now.”

Her almond-shaped eyes so much like hers filled up with sympathy. 

“It was hard at first but I have family. Two daughters. Family, My brother just drove down to be with me. I have friends that check up on me and I have *the* best job. I get to help people all the time so between all those things I don’t have time to be sad or feel alone. I actually feel more fulfilled than I ever have. I’m very blessed.”

“You are *that*!”

She said flirtatiously looking me over. I blushed a little. The old me would have said something cocky like “Well you know.” Like yeah, I am. Or I would have said “And so are you in *all* the right places.

“I try.”

I said modestly. 

“So, what do you do?”

She asked crossing her long legs. I smiled.

“I’m a doctor.”

“Beauty and brains hunh? You’re the total package.”

“Work in progress Actually I'm more like the beast.”

I laughed.

"Oh, I beat you can be quite the beast. Will you let me find out?

“And you?”

She sat her cup down and moved closer to me. Then she started to slid her dress off her shoulders. Whoa! She was gonna take me right here in the open. Ok some years ago maybe. This was moving to fast. I watched for a minute eyeing the view and a nice view it was. NO! NO! Go back in your box I locked you up in. I grabbed her arm to stop her.

"What's the rush? I just wanna get to know you."

I told her. She looked surprised but slid her strap back up her shoulder.

"Your different."

"I could never allow you to undress like that in a place like this. You have a beautiful body don't get me wrong, but it should only be for certain eyes to see. And you *just* meet me. Besides I'm enjoying just talking to you. I wanna know more about you, Rhianna. Like what do you do for a living? What kind of things are you into?"

“Well, I work for the Birmingham News. As a matter of fact, I think you would be perfect for a series we’re reading called “Men of Vision”  
“Really?”  
“Yes. Every month we spotlight African American men who have been an inspiration and a driving force behind the growth and development of the city. There will be an article and even a photograph.”  
“  
What would I have to do?”

“Simple. I’d just have you come in, set down, interview you. Typical stuff, nothing too taxing, your likes, interest, what a day is like for you at work. Maybe even a brief tv segment will run. It’s new, so we’re still getting the kinks worked out. I can set that up for you If you’d like.”

She reached into her purse and handed me her phone. I looked down at it and I looked at her. It all seemed on board enough. I didn’t really care about the fame of being in the news and on television. I’d been approached by the media *PLENTY* when they found out who my daughters were. But if I could influence just ONE young brother to follow in my shoes and go into the medical profession and let them see that there was another way other than the streets, wouldn’t that be the right thing to do? I was about to put my number in her contacts when all of a sudden there was a commotion going on and it looked like people were gravitating toward one of the sections. It looked like the one I was in. Suddenly I got a bad instinct and jumped up. Tasha!

“I’m sorry.”

I apologized. I heard her call out to me, but I didn’t stop. I pushed through the crowd. I didn’t know what I expected, but I was cursing myself all the while. SHIT! I promised I wouldn’t take my eyes off her. The first person I saw blocking my view was this guy. At first, I shoved him out of the way, but then to my absolute horror, I saw my niece slumped over and laid out on the floor...

“WHAT DID YOU DO?”

I yelled. I went over to the guy and snatched him up by the front of his shirt.

“I didn’t...”

He stumbled.

“I came back, and she was like this...”

My doctor instincts kicked in. I didn’t have time for him. I dropped down on the floor next to her.

“Cinda.”

I shook her, but she was unresponsive. I kneeled over her. She had a pulse, so that was good. Her heart was beating, but slowly. I needed to get her to the hospital. The manager came rushing in.

“What happened here?”

He looked at the guy and then at me.

“My niece. I found her like this. I don’t know what happened, but I need to get her to the hospital.”

I can call the ambulance.”

He offered and rushed off before I could stop him. I debated whether that was necessary. I was capable of taking her myself, but then maybe it was the best thing. Reece could take Tasha home. But where were Reece and Tasha? First things first, tho. Cinda didn’t need to be on the floor, so I scooped her up and put her on the couch as carefully as I could. DAMN IT! Lynn was gonna hit the ceiling! First, I called James. His phone went to voice mail. TYPICAL! I left a brief message for him to call me. 

“James, this is Ken. When you get this message, call me back. Me, Reece, Tasha, and Cinda went to the Club and something happened to Cinda. The paramedics have been called and I’m gonna go with her to the hospital.”

I called Shereece’s phone. Again, I got voice mail. I was starting to get frustrated. Why wasn’t anybody picking up?

“Shereece! If your still *here* please pick up. Something happened to Cinda and I need to go with her to the hospital. Call me back! I’m in our section waiting for the ambulance.”

Then I saw the reason Shereece wasn’t answering her purse was sitting on the seat and vibrating, which meant it wasn’t on her. I stood up and scanned the dance floor, trying to find her in the crowd. I had an idea and sat down across from Cinda. There was a GPS tracker on Tasha’s phone. I know she’d have it on her. The phone was tracking somewhere, but the location wasn’t inside the club. And when I looked at it and it showed that the phone was somewhere in Railroad Park? Hunh? That’s when I checked my messages and saw that’s exactly where she was. How in the world was she *there*?  
I made the best decision I could under the circumstances given to me. I left the car there. Shereece had keys to it. I didn’t feel great about leaving her purse lying around on the seat, so I took out everything I thought that was important (her wallet and credit cards) and I stuck them in my own jacket pocket. She had the phone message and I sent a text. When the paramedics arrived, I told them to admit Cinda and I would be right behind. Keith had just showed up, so we would go and pick up Tasha and drop her off by the house. James and I could take one of my other cars (or his) and go back to the hospital. My other nieces would be there to watch her. I knew she probably didn’t want to wait around at the hospital.  
Keith looked at me and shook his head as we head toward Railroad Park.

“Damn man, I thought I was having a crazy-ass, night.”

“You don’t know the half.”

I said tiredly.

“Since when do *you* have a grandkid?”

He laughed.

“Since about a week.”

“And how old is this grandkid?”

“Thirteen.”

“Thirteen?”

“Yeah, man. And no before you ask. I have no idea how she got there. But I should have been keeping a better eye on her *and* my niece.”

“You can’t be too hard on yourself Ken. Cinda’s a grown-ass woman and 13-year-old girls… well. I mean I’ve snuck off with a few back in the day when I was 13.”

“Great!”

I muttered. He’d given me something else to think about that I hadn’t. I wasn’t even thinking that she’d snuck off to be with a boy. Could this night get *any* better (I thought sarcastically).

“You know your younger brother that lives in LA?”

“Kevon. Yeah. What’s up?”

“Does he still work for PBS (Private Bodyguard Services)?”

Keith snorted.  
“  
Does he? That’s all that fool ever talks about. He always gonna on and on about what politician or what celebrity he got to escort this week.”

“Does he do private surveillance?”

“Wherever the money goes he goes?”

“Do you think you could give me his number? I just may have some work for him?”

“I’ll do you one better?”

He made a call and it went through on the speaker of his car. His brother’s voice filled the car.

“A PHI!”

Keith greeted.

“O6.”

His brother answered and laughed.

“What’s up, man?”

“I got Ken here with me. He wanted to talk to you about some work.”

“Okay. Hey man, what’s going on?”

He asked me.

“Chill’n man. What’s been good with you?”

“You know me, man. Just working hard.”

“I feel that.”

“But are you ok?”

“Hey man. I’m *good*. I see people that come through that place all the time that’s doing ten times worse. Some of with the best attitudes. So, if they are in good spirits, I certainly don’t have a right to complain about *nothing*.”

“I hear that!”

“Yeah, but what I wanted to know was about your services. I think I might just need you to keep an eye on someone for me.”

“Ok, so what kind of services you talking about? Do you need full-time protection? Do you need event security? Do you need an unarmed driver? Do you need an armed driver? Or do you need executive protection? This is for your daughters, I take it?”

“Not exactly. It’s for my granddaughter. I think full time. Just until I can get her out here with me.”

“I see well, usually for that and if I have to stay on the premises, we’re talking 700 a day. You know I’d hook you up tho. I’d say maybe 500 a day.”

“Ok. That sounds reasonable.”

“So, is this like did you want her to be aware I’m there or would this be without her knowledge?”

“I wouldn’t do anything without her consent. I was just reaching out to get some idea of cost before I ran the idea to her and my daughter. She just told me something tonight that had me very concerned.”

“Gotcha! Yeah, I’d be happy to do that for you. Just let me know. I don’t have any other clients scheduled right now but that could change in a heartbeat so you’ll have to let me know if you want me to get right on it.”

I had Keith to park, and I went to the area she told me she was in. I found her sleep in one of the seats. I scooped her up and let her get on my back piggyback style and wrap her arms around my neck. I put her on the back seat.

“Paw Paw this isn’t your car.”

“I know. So, remember when I told you about my frat brother when I took you home from work?”

She nodded tiredly.

“Well this is his car and that’s him.”

“Hey.”

He waved.

“He’s gonna take us back to the house. I have to get back to the hospital. Something bad happened to Cinda.”

“What happened to Cinda?”

“I don’t know but I need to get back there and find out. Are you gonna be ok at the house by yourself? My nieces are there.”

“I’m so tired Paw Paw.”

“I know. We’ll be home in a sec and you can go straight to sleep.”

“Paw Paw we have to take her too?”

She said sleepily.

“Her who sweetheart?”

I asked in confusion.

“The other girl. Didn’t you see her?”

“There was another girl?”

I hadn’t seen anyone. Tasha drifted back to sleep. Poor thing she’s probably worn out. I’d wait until she got some rest for her to tell me how she’d got there. 

“So, you’ve been talking about me hunh?”

Keith laughed.

“What’d you tell her?”

"I told her you're a huge pain in the butt! That’s what I told her.”

“Aww, I love you to Kenny.”

“Seriously though what’s up?”

Then he proceeded to tell me that he had again found his old lady messing around and he was gonna go where she and dude was and give him a beatdown. He probably wanted me to come along to make sure it was just and didn’t go somewhere else. I just thought to myself (but keep my mouth shut) instead of kicking this guys’ ass, he really oughta just let *her* go. But then, I don’t think I had the right to say *anything* after all the stuff B put me through and I didn’t walk away. Now there was a time when we separated for a little but we got back together.

When I got back to the house, James was now up and practically yanked the door off the hinges when I rang the bell.  
“Ken. What happened man? Where’s Cinda? Is she okay?”

“All I know is we were all together dancing. She and Shereece slipped off somewhere. I went back to our section to wait on the food. Then Tasha came and started talking to me. Then a lady asked me to dance and I danced with her. Then I went to her section to talk to her. Then I heard the commotion and I came back and she was passed out on the floor.”

James looked at me incredulously.

“I checked her. Her pulse and her heart rate were slow. She. She wasn’t responding.”  
  
“What do you think happened?”

He asked frantically  
“  
I don’t know man. Does she have any medical conditions? Allergies?”

He shook his head.

“We have to get to the hospital. Come on.”

“I’ll drive!”

When we got there, I marched start to the back with my brother behind me. Chantelle (a nurse I knew) stopped me.

“Dr. Jamison. You’re here. They just brought her back.”

“Is my niece ok? I want test run. I want X-rays stat.”

“Your niece?”

She looked at me in confusion. Then I looked at her with the same confusion.

“Yes my *niece* LuCinda Dubois.”

“Oh my god! You don’t know.”

“Know?”

“Dr. Jamison your daughter was just brought in a few minutes ago.”


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is Montreal's profile.

Montreal Hawkins  
Introducing Number 17 TREAL HAWKINS! Montreal isn’t exactly a new character, but he’s one that was just background. I think I first introduced him as a friend of Harlem’s and they were playing a game of basketball in the gym fooling around trying to outplay the other one. I may have even mentioned him in the first RPG I wrote for in the Jem Universe. A lot of Treal’s background has been explained in this post. He’s 7 feet tall, light-skinned has curly hair and big brown eyes. He reminds me in looks of a guy that was special to me in the 11th grade (that is until things went sour (. Yet to this day I can think back to this particular ex and still feel something whereas the others I just want to erase their existence from my memory. Treal grew up in Birmingham Alabama and when he was younger attended Wenonah Elementary. His mother worked there in the library. Treal has fond memories of Wenonah Elementary because he used to love to go to the library because there was a ladder that led up to an attic and he’d go up there and read Goosebump books. When Wenonah Elementary was torn down, his mother got hired at Wenonah High School as a guidance counselor (right next door). Treal was always bright and did well in his classes so he passed the exam for Ramsey High School (where all the smart kids went) easily. His height got him a spot on the team and his skills on the court made him one of the best players on the team. His easy personality made him popular with the guys and girls. He and Harlem became instant friends when they went up against each other in debate class at Ramey. Their bond was further strengthened when they discovered they both had a love of video games. His senior year it got him several scholarships, but in the end, he chooses UCLA where his best friend Harlem attended. They became roommates. Montreal is an only child and growing up became very close to his mother (Betty). Treal is very much a mama’s boy. His relationship with his father was somewhat strained because (Marvin) spent most of Treal’s teenage years locked up for illegal activities. But they were still able to communicate and do so still to this day. As far as personality, Treal has a big heart. If anything, sometimes it’s *too* big. He loves *hard* and falls easily. A very dangerous combination! One of the things that hold his heart the most is his city. It saddens him that it’s fallen in such disarray over the years and he tries to give back through developing educational and recreational means for the youth of Birmingham and the citizens. I can eventually see Treal becoming the mayor of this fictional (yet real) account of B-Ham. He eventually starts Hawkins Sports Academy and renovates the old mall Centre Plaza as a gift. Teal can be very fun-natured and spontaneous. He’s a very live in the moment kind of character. He plays for the fictional basketball team the CHAMELEONS. Treal is also a proud member of the fraternity PHI BETA SIGMA (Caryn’s sorority’s brothers). Treal when not traveling resides in LA. He’s private about his relationships and sexual orientation (bi-sexual). But he has strong, intimate feelings for both Shereece and Harlem. He also has ties to a man by the name of Kyle (who he has a toxic relationship with) purely sexual. Other than basketball, Treal is a gifted artist and enjoys sketching and digital art. Montreal always wears a cross to symbolize his Christian beliefs and attends church whenever he gets the chance. He also has a biblical bible verse tattoed on his right bicep He has another one over his heart of a crab (Shereece's zodiac sign) and one on his back of a Gemini sign.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Montreal arrives in Birmingham Alabama, and the first thing he does is go to make amends with his best friend Harlem for having an affair with his ex-girlfriend Shereece. He's surprised to discover intense feelings for him that he didn't know had built up over the years. After telling his mother he's infected with HIV, he takes her out and they enjoy an evening together eating at O Charleys and having a shopping spree at the Riverchase Galleria. Later on that night, more feelings surface when he revisits memories he shared with Shereece when they were in a relationship. Things start to heat up, as they plan to leave together, but a disturbance leaves Shereece passed out and unresponsive. Montreal takes Shereece to Princeton, where Kenneth reveals her issue of having blackouts and possibly the cause of them. The songs mentioned are "Alone" by Tevin Campbell and a line from "My Conscious Says No." by 2 Close (but it's spelled 11 Close)

Montreal  
You Know What I Want and What I Need Baby  
  
Man, this was a crazy 24 hours! I wasn’t expecting *none* of this when my flight touched down. The first thing I did when I got my bag was to rent a car and check in to the Hilton suites with a few of the guys on the team that had joined me. It was on the way to the suite that I heard the news about Kenzie and cursed to myself. He was at it again! A very particular memory stood out in my head.  
  
It was Kenzie’s 1st birthday party. Every event that Stylz (Harlem) had come home for, I had ridden back with him. That year they just decided to do an at-home party for her. They’d chosen a carnival theme for the party. And when I tell you, they’d went all out. They had game booths all over the backyard. They had prize booths. They had food stands with hotdogs, lemonade, popcorn, cotton candy, and caramel corn, and funnel cakes. They even had a Candy, Apple, Bar. They had people doing face paintings. There were even tents set up.   
  
So, everyone had gathered in the main tent. It was all the kids from Kenzie’s daycare. Stylz told me to come in the house and help his sister bring out the cake. You should have seen this cake. It was 2 tiers. The bottom had blue diamond shapes. The top had red stripes but all around it were popcorn, pretzels, and lollipops. On top of It was a big candy, apple, a corn dog, and cotton candy on a stick sticking out the sides.  
  
We got to the top of the steps and heard a loud argument going on in the kitchen. “Jack” (ok I know that’s not his name, but that was my name for him because I always thought he was a jack ass) was screaming on her for getting the wrong kind of cake. Apparently, he told her he didn’t want lemon. She was arguing back that it wasn’t his birthday. He then demanded to know if she was getting smart with him and told her “Well if you like lemon so much.” Then he picked up the cake off the table and shoved it right in her face. I was standing there thinking did this fool just. I had to grab Stylz's arm and hold him back from going in there and kicking “Jack’s” ass. Still, not sure how I was able to do that.  
  
I think I suggested we go to Publix and pick up another cake so that way no one would know what had just gone down and Kenzie wouldn’t be upset. She was waiting for her cake so she could get to the presents. Which always used to be *my* favorite part. Crisis averted for now.   
  
The next parties were slightly less uneventful. “Jack” didn’t seem like the social type so he usually just was in a corner somewhere at Kenzie’s earlier parties. He’d speak and then make himself scarce. I don’t think anyone was offended by that (as he always seemed to bring the mood down). He was like a black cloud. “Slept Rock” was my other little secret name for “Jack”.  
  
When I first joined the NBA, it felt surreal. I was just an ordinary guy from the Ham. I did average at Ramsey. Not even really sure how I scored high even to get in. But I hung around *smart* people so I caught on quick with some help. I was liked because I was “the clown”. I always keep everyone’s spirits up and was quick to eliminate conflicts. And popular because I was one of the starters on the basketball team. So because I can get along with practically anyone, I fit in with the other guys on the team with ease. Yeah, they teased me a little bit and gave me a hard time as “the newbie”, but it was all in fun. I didn’t mind. 

As soon as I heard them make the announcement on 98.7, I knew *exactly* where he’d be. I grabbed my jacket and told my roommate.

“I’ll be back. I’m going out for a little.”

Kyle had just stepped out the shower and had a towel wrapped around his waist.

“You leaving?”

“Yeah. I got some stops to make.”

He looked at me a minute and then blurted out.

“Are you going to see *him*?”

I sighed. I really didn’t wanna get into this right now. I said lightly.

“I’m going to see *a lot* of people. I’m gonna stop in and see my mom. I haven’t seen her in a while.”

“Oh, so I'm not good enough to meet Mama Hawkins, Treal?"

He pouted and flopped down on the bed and laid in a provocative position with one leg propped open. 

“Gimme a minute.”

I mumbled. I didn’t like being pressured. Kyle and I had gone out a few times. I admit we’d had fun together. Now he was trying to take it somewhere *else*. 

“Why don’t I give you something else instead with yo fine ass.”

He said seductively and loosed his towel so it fell to the floor. I needed to get out of there. 

“Later.”

I told him and walked out the door before he decided to come over to me and take his seduction further. The thing about Kyle was while he came on strong and acted like he wanted us to have something serious, the other half of the time he was talking smack to the other guys about how many women he was screwing. But I certainly wasn’t impressed! I was comfortable dating men. I was comfortable dating women. I didn’t broadcast what I did but I didn’t go around running off at the mouth and acting like someone I wasn’t. I had my suspicions that fooling around with Kyle had gotten me where I am right now. I knew Kyle probably wasn’t any good for me, but I just could *not* seem to stay away from toxic relationships. 

I knew *exactly* where Harlem would be. I was one of the few people, he’d confided in about Kenzie’s secret hiding place. I was hoping like hell that’s where she’d be but when he opened the door. I knew she wasn’t. It was still early so we hit up Waffle House. Just sitting here with him reminded me of so many late-night study sessions when we were studying for exams way back when. It seemed like ages ago. I leaned back, sipped some coffee, and then stared at Harlem.

Then I *really* looked at Harlem. Harlem had always been attractive to the females in our class, but now as I looked at him. Damn! When did his arm muscles get so defined? His shirt clung a little more to his chest than I’d remembered. I sighed.

“I’m sorry/ I know it doesn’t make up for what I did but you have to believe me. I’m so sorry. I never meant for it to come between our friendship. It just happened.”

I eyed his long, slender, fingers as he picked up his glass of water and took a sip. Surprised at the desire inside me to reach over and touch his hand or arm. Just to let him know I was sincere. I shifted slightly. He wasn’t saying anything. Please say something.

“You could have had *any* one else Treal. First Shawn and then you.”

“I know. At the time, I guess I tried to tell myself you said you were over her. You were really feelin ATL.”

“So, what happened?”

“Do you really wanna know?”

Harlem just nodded slowly. Well, we might as well get this out in the open here. Even though it was cutting me to even say this to his face. I begin the story. 

“It was my first game. I was *pumped*! Nerves were on 10. All that was in my head was FOCUS! You got this! You can win this thing! I had my game face on. I wasn’t paying no attention to nothing else around me. I think at half time I heard it going around they (Reece, Cara, and Joi) were in the stands. But we were down by 3 points so I know if I could get those points, I could catch us up. I’ll never forget that first game against the Bulldogs. We beat them 25 to 18. Some of the guys were on me about her having her eye on me throughout the whole game. I didn’t think anything of it. I knew through you that she really liked basket-ball. I told them that’s all that was. But then a few months later, I saw her at another one of our games.”

I toweled off after a very close against the Indians. When I looked up there she was again. Every single thing in my body told me. “Just keep walking to the locker room to shower, get dressed, and go back to the hotel until it’s time for you to catch another flight.” She was the enemy. *She’d* hurt my best friend so we didn’t associate with her anymore. But instead, I walked up to her and said in a playful way.

“Are you stalking me?”

“No. But I like watching you play. You have skills. I give you that.”

“In other words, you like watching *me*.”

I teased her and she rolled her eyes.

“It’s ok. I won’t tell anyone. You can admit it.”

“Maybe I was watching you.”

"See! I knew it!"

Those pretty eyes of hers bore into mine in a challenge kind of way.

“Maybe I was watching you because...”

“Yesss...”

“Because I want to ask you out.”

Now at that point, my mind was screaming and flashing red lights like a siren. No Treal. I looked over her curvy, slender figure, ripped jeans, and tank top showing her nice abs and navel ring. Yeah, she’s fine as hell, but no you’re not *that* guy. The line of that song popped in my head "With a woman like you it's hard for a man to be strong". Cause right now my conscious was definitely telling me HELL NO! Tell her you can’t. I hesitated. She was looking at me like well.

“I uh. I don’t know how long we’ll be here. I may go back to the room, pack, and be on the next flight.”

I hated lying. I knew we weren’t flying out till later that evening. 

“Oh. Ok.”

I hated *that* even more. The look in females’ eyes when they felt like you let them down. But it’s what she *deserves* my mind said. She said.

“Well, I guess I’ll go then.”

*YES! * Please do! I started to watch her walk away, but then I decided I couldn’t do it. There was just something about that look in her eyes. The Shereece I knew in high school; I’d seen get approached by plenty of guys. Yet, I never saw her ask *one* out. Not even Harlem. She made damn sure he was the one that did the asking. Any other way wasn’t her style. So I guess I felt pretty, damn, special. In hindsight, I knew it was probably all the attention I was getting being the newest member of the NBA and all the press. But I told myself nah. She doesn’t need my shine. Eye Candy was in growing more and more popular by the day. You couldn’t turn on the radio without hearing their hits. Their first album had just made its debut and the album was already up for nominations best new group and single.

“Wait!”

I caught up to her.

“Let me check on some things. Give me your number and I’ll call you. Maybe we can have lunch.”

*Lunch* sounded innocent enough. It wasn’t *dinner*. Friends had lunch dates, right? Maybe Shereece was lonely and needed a friend. When we were at school, she was always surrounded by *so* many people. You would think by looking at her she’d never feel that way. But I’d learned that while all *this*was a rush, there *were* times when I’d go back to my hotel at night and they’d head off to celebrate wins, I felt empty. Sure, I had my mom to share my wins with but no one really special in my life. Sometimes I even felt it when I *didn’t* go back to my room and opt-out of clubbing and decided to go. Women would practically be in my lap throwing it at me, and I felt *nothing*! And I *tried* to embrace the lifestyle, but it just never seemed to fit. 

When I got back to the room and plopped down on the bed. I remember staring at the phone. I was thinking I should call Harlem. It had been some weeks since we talked. So many things had hit me at once. Before I knew it, I had to be packed and I was being sent to training camp and that’s all I had the mental energy for. When training was done, I was EXHAUSTED! The only thing that was on my mind was my bed. But as I looked at my phone, I started to think how could you even *think* about calling him and asking him if he was ok with something like that. Would *you* be okay with *him* going out with the girl that broke your heart? So, I let the phone ring once and then hung up.

I should just not call her back at all. My mind said. I should just leave her hanging. But when my stomach started to growl. I thought. What’s the harm of having lunch? It’s two people eating. Some conversation. I’d go on my way. She’d go on hers. Once the fascination had grown off and she’d gotten her way by me accepting to let her take me out, she’d move on to the next man. Only it *didn’t* quite turn out that way. Before I knew it we were talking *all* the time and spending every opportunity we could together. We just could not stay apart from each other. Before I knew it we were being photographed out together as “The Cutest Couple in Entertainment”.

“And I guess *(* never once came up.”

“That’s not true man. She did say she regretted how it ended with the two of you. She said she thought about it a lot. I think it really hurt her, but I think there was a reason.”

He snorted.

“Seriously. I mean she didn’t tell me what, but it was something deep.”

Hmm! Maybe I could help get him that. Maybe with this missing puzzle piece solved...

“I would have never done that to you! I thought we had a code.”

“I know man. I know. I was wrong and I’ve thought about it over the years/ Since, Harlem. I’m sick man.”

I don’t know why it was important to me that he knew this. I had planned on telling my mom first, but it just came out. I fidgeted with a straw nervously. Please don’t let this change anything I thought. Harlem studied me and frowned.

“Sick? What do you mean you’re sick? You look alright/”

“I tested positive.”

He looked at me waiting for the joke, but this time my face was dead serious. This was so hard… If he decided he didn’t want anything to do with me all over again. All of a sudden, I felt a surge of anger with the partners I’d had (though it hadn’t been many). 

“You aren’t joking are you.”

“I’ve dated both men and women.”

I explained. 

“Since when?”

He looked at me in disbelief because yes when we were in high school, I had dated a nice girl that I’d been crazy about and had taken to our junior prom. But because of stuff going on in my family, I’d pushed that girl away and when I think about it, it was probably one of the things I regretted most because she would have stuck by me. I wouldn’t have wilded out and gotten infected. I owed her an apology. Just another one to add to the list before I leave this place.

“For a couple of years now. I’ve been able to keep it out of social media for the most part. It’s been expensive and I’ve had to pay off and track down some publications. I’ve gotten some blackmails. It hasn’t been easy, but my best friend so I had to tell you. I got the results about a month ago.”

"Do you know which one it was?"

"I think I have a good idea. I'm just not one hundred. I was messing around with someone. I knew he had a wild past, but it just never came up."  
“Shit Treal. I mean do you have to do treatments or..”

“I have options. I’ve been talking to my Doctor. I use PrEP so I won't infect any of my partners."

“Damn man that’s... I don’t know what to say.”

I kinda smiled.

“That’s ok. I’m sure I’ll get more than enough *say* when I tell my mom. I just had to tell you.”

I looked at him. Searching his features. Noticing the way, he licked his full lips after having a sip of his coffee. He had nice lips. I drank some of my own drink so my eyes wouldn’t linger too long.

“You know what? We’re good. All that’s in the past.”

“And it doesn’t bother you?”

My heart leaped a little. So there was hope.

“It’s not my place to judge you for the choices you made man. Not when I’ve made some real fucked up choices myself. We all have to live our own lives. I’m just sorry that this happened. But if you need me for anything I’m here. I always have been. That’s never changed and it never will.”

That simple statement meant more to me than he’d ever know. I’d carry that with me until that day after a championship 5 years later they found me in my bed unresponsive and I left this world.

“But how can I help you? I want to make this right. I NEED to make this right.”

I pleaded.

“Well unless you have access to a super-computer that can hack into databases, pull traffic light stop images of vehicles and traceback transactions, I’m not sure there’s anything *too* do.”  
This shouldn’t have happened to Kenzie.”

“So, what do you wanna do? Talk to me.”

I looked at him to let him know that I was down for whatever way he wanted to handle *Jack*. Now, up until this point in my life, I’d done good about staying out of major trouble. I mean there had been some *wild* nights with the rest of my teammates, but nothing that amounted me having to spend the night behind bars. Or getting shot at. I'd visited my Dad a time or two and I *definitely* didn't want to end up where he was.I had a piece for safety because over the years I haven’t always been able to determine who was in my life for the wrong and right reasons and just in case someone tried to try me or rob me I’d be prepared. But I’d thankfully lived a quiet life. However, being back in this place stirred something in me.

“Well, first I need to check on Moms, Rick, and my sister. I’m not even sure where they are. They might be at Mom’s place.”

“I feel you.”

“Then I think I need to go back to my sister’s place.”

I trailed off. I got his meaning loud and clear.

“Then that’s what we’ll do.”

And that’s what we did. We finished up at the Waffle House and I paid for both of us. I then drove him to his Mom’s house. I parked outside, but he stopped me before I went in. 

“I need you to come with me. I have to tell them something. Something I’m not even sure what to do with.”

“I got you.”

I told him quietly. I’ve always got you. I thought to myself. They were all there but in different places. When we opened the door, Mrs. Burton wrapped us both up in a sweet-scented hug. She looked tired but still just as pretty as I remembered. Did that lady ever age? I swear she must have the fountain of youth hidden somewhere in this place. She invited us into the kitchen, all the while asking how I was and offering us a peach pie she’d just took out the oven. I told her for the most part, I was fine, and she told complimented me on how great a season we’d been having. 

Harlem asked where the others were and she told us she wasn’t sure where Rick was. She said he was probably at the station again harassing them about giving him updates and why more wasn’t being done. Or either he was downstairs on the phone (doing the same thing). His sister she said had been prescribed a mild sedative and was upstairs resting. 

“Mom, I need to tell you something. I’m not sure how to but.”

“How many months?”

“What?”

“I said how many months is she?”

Harlem looked dumbfounded and I stared at him. A father? That was the last thing I expected. I almost fell off the chair I was sitting in.  
"You didn't tell me."

I mouthed to him.

“But how did?”

“How did I know? She called me this morning and told me she thought I should know and that her flight would be arriving this evening. Oh, and she also told me you were having twins.”

What? Harlem though didn’t look particularly like the happy, father to be. He just looked. tired.

“Well, aren’t you going to say something? Yell? Scream? How could you let this happen? Smack me upside the head.”

She shook her head.

“I think it’s a little too late for that, don’t you? No, your always quick to say “I’m a grown-ass man”. Well, now you got that.”

“What if I don’t want to be a grown, ass, man no more.”

He mumbled.

“Hey, you sleep around you get babies. I told you a *long* time ago be careful who you slept with didn’t I?”

“But *twins*… I’m still in *school*. I *can’t*, I'm not ready."

My head was moving from one to the other. 

“You don’t really have a choice, do you? That girl didn’t make those babies by herself.”

She sighed.

“And you know that even though you got yourself into this we’ll do what we can to help her *and* my grandbabies.”

“Thank you.”

“But I have to ask you this? Do you even care anything about this one or was she just another one you were fooling around with?”

Harlem got quiet.

“That’s what I thought.”

“Excuse me. I have to make a call.”

I said. Not needing to hear anymore. I let myself out on the deck and sat down on the steps. I pulled out my cell phone and made a call.

“Jake Lake here.”

“Hey, Jake. It’s Treal.”

“Hey man. How’s it going? I haven’t heard from you in a while. Is everything ok.”

“I’m ok. I just needed to talk to you about something.”

“Sure. What do you need?”

“Ok my question is if I wanted to update my will and leave half to my mom and the other half to someone else could I do that? I know I made her the executor but what if I wanted to in case something happened to me could I transfer my money into someone else’s account or could I set up an account, put it in my name, and then have it transferred to them in case anything happened to me?”

“Yes. There are options we can explore. I’ll be happy to sit down and discuss them with you. I think we should meet face to face so if you have any questions or concerns, I can go over them with you thoroughly.”

“That sounds good.”

“When would you like to meet?”

“This schedule is crazy. I don’t know.”

I scrolled through the email of all the dates and places they’d given me.

“How bout if you email me your next stop and I’ll fly out to meet you and we can get it all taken care of then? How does that sound?”

“Thanks, Jake! I appreciate you, man.”

“Any time Mr. Hawkins. I am at your disposal.”

Jake (my lawyer) was a good guy. I liked Jake and I really felt like I could trust him. He’d never steered me wrong so far. I stuck around a little longer until it started to get late. For a little while, Harlem joined me on the deck and we just sat on the steps. 

“Are you ready to ride out?”

I asked quietly. 

“She’s making me stay here.”

He mumbled. Mrs. Burton was no joke! She probably knew already what he was planning, just like she knew about the babies

“Then in a little while, I have to go pick her up.”

“I can go with you to pick her up.”

I offered. He snorted.

“Do you *really* wanna meet her tho?”

I did out of curiosity but something about the way he said it made me think otherwise.

“I mean is she *that* bad*?”

He just gave me a look and shook his head. I burst out laughing.

“You sure know how to pick 'em.”

“Don’t remind me.”

He groaned. I studied Harlem a minute. Maybe what you really need is someone that will make it easy and not give you drama and make your life hell all the time I was thinking. You don’t always have to fall for the bad girls. They never have a clue how to treat you right. That’s not what you need. But I let my thoughts remain silent. Harlem wasn’t *that way*. He would never feel that way about me. But it just didn’t stop what was growing inside me for him. I don’t know maybe it had been there all along. Maybe I just hadn’t realized it or had been too shy to admit my feelings to even myself. Maybe that’s why I hadn’t been able to pull myself away from his side all day and was maybe just a little jealous that this girl got to have him the rest of the night.

“What’s her name?”

I asked. 

“Deja.”

He said heavily. 

“Can I see a picture?”

He shrugged, opened his phone, pulled up his text, and passed the phone to me. I looked at the pretty girl with long, dark, braids, and Asian features. His mother appeared at the door.

“I don’t know what you're laying around out here for like you don’t have nothing to do. If your baby momma is coming, you need to help me get the house straight for her and the room downstairs so she’ll have someplace to sleep.”

He groaned.

“She should have just stayed where she was.”

He said under his breath. 

“Do you mind if I swing by and see my mom for a few. I’ll check on the house and text you. Then I’ll be back later.”

“Yeah, man. It’s cool.”

“Hey. It’s gonna be okay.”

I touched his arm lightly causing a spark to shoot through me. Ok. You *really* need to cut that out, I told myself and tried to will my heartbeats to stop jumping all over the place. He’s her baby daddy. She’ll be the one he’s next to tonight so you might as well just get it out your head. Well not that Rick would be hearing any of that up in his house. She'd probably take the room in the basement and he'd be on the couch.

“Yeah.”

He said not sounding convinced. I really wanted to tell him more but he’d find out in time. After that, I spent a little time at my mom’s place. Rinse. Repeat. I told her basically the same thing I told him and she burst into tears. I spent over an hour just holding her and trying to convince her I wasn’t about to kick the bucket right then and there. In order to put her in better spirits, I told her to get dressed and I’d take her someplace nice for dinner. So we decided to go to O Charley’s. She really liked the rolls.

“Ma, I was thinking. Now that you’ve retired from teaching at Wenonah, what are you gonna do?”

“What do you mean what am I gonna do? I’m gonna *rest*. I’ve been teaching for 30 years.”

“Yeah I mean but you gone be bored after a while.”

She raised her eyebrows at me like the hell you say.

“I think I can find ways to entertain myself and I’ ma damn sure enjoy not having to clock in every day.”

“Well, what if *(* have a proposition for you?”

“What kind of proposition?”

“In December you have your retirement thing, right?”

She nodded.

“And you said you wanted to travel more?”

She nodded again.

“Well, how you be my manager?”

She thought about this as she dug into her Southern Fried Chicken Salad.

“Are you serious? You want *me* to manage you?”

“I can’t think of anyone better to make sure I stay on track with appearances and interviews and keep everything with my finances straight. You can help me stay on top of all the deals and endorsements I’m offered. You know I’m no good with that stuff.”

“What happened to the other girl you had working for you? Did you fall out?”

“No. She wanted to start a family of her own. I couldn’t tell her no to that.”

“I suppose not. It’s a lot to think about. I’d be constantly on the road with you. Who’d watch the house?”

“I was thinking about that. Harlem’s sister. You remember her, right? It’s not safe for her to be at that house ma. She needs to be somewhere far away from *him*, and he doesn’t know where we stay. We can let her stay there. I can get security to come to check in daily. I can pay them.”

“But what if she doesn’t want to leave?”

She said gently.

“Then you could talk to her.”

My mom was a counselor. That’s what she did. She worked with young women in bad situations on the daily. She’d even saved some of them and got them out of their situations. I had no doubt she could do the same for Sasha.

“So, they found her?”

I slumped back in my seat and shook my head. Then I thought about something. Of course, why hadn’t I thought of it sooner? It was staring me right in the face! 

“When was the last time you talked to Marvin?”

Marvin (otherwise known as dear ol Dad). The same Dad that had served time for 10 years for hacking into bank accounts and moving funds from one account to another. She frowned but replied.

“The last time I spoke with him, he was trying to sell me on some scheme or another with a truck. That man *never* changes. God, I don’t know what I ever saw in him! I heard he remarried and stays somewhere in Trussville. Honestly, I feel sorry for the poor woman once she sees that he’s only good for one thing.”

"Did not need to hear that mama."

"Well, you're grown now so I don't need to give you the sugar-coated version."

Uh yes, you do. No, don't do that. I thought as she got this look over how *good* he could lay pipe. I quickly changed the subject before she got to reminiscing.

“Do you mind if I call him? Do you have his number?”

“Not sure what you’d want with him, but it’s been so long since I called him. I may have an old number. He went through so many that I’m not sure if the one I have is good anymore.”

“That’s ok. If it’s not, I can always try Goggle search or social media.”

“And might I ask what you could possibly have to say to him, and he hasn’t reached out to you since he found out you were offered a spot on the team?”

“We speak... occasionally.”

I say about once or twice a year. Unlike a lot of young brothers out there, I didn’t have resentment for Pops. He was in my life until I was 13, and as much as he could he’d write me from prison. I’d visit every now and then. Mom wasn’t crazy about it, but despite how she felt she let me make up my mind about the kind of relationship I choose to have with him. I just wished he could have found a better way to use his talents. 

After dinner, we rode out to the Riverchase Galleria with all it’s 137 stores, food courts, and restaurants. I hadn’t been there for a while. So, I was surprised to see some things were added and some were taken away from when I use to live here. I watched and waited patiently while my mom hit up Macy's and took her time browsing through racks of clothes and shoes. I was just happy to see her happy. That’s really been the best part of playing for the NBA. It’s been the way I’ve been able to give back to my mom and hopefully one day the city. Other players had opened up training academies for youth, why shouldn’t my home town have one there too? I’d call it “HAWK SPORTS ACADEMY”. It was high time someone started putting something into Birmingham other than restaurants, movie theatres, and malls. I would buy some secluded land and built it from the ground up. Then I handed over my card to charge it all. I even got a couple of warmer clothes and dress clothes for myself. We stayed at the mall until closing time. Then I dropped her back off at the house.

“Are you staying?”

“Do you want me to stay?”

“I’d feel better if you did.”

“You do know nothings gonna happen to me, right? I mean well at least not tonight. I hope not. But I’m gonna be ok.”

I squeezed her hand.

“You don’t know that. You know what? Maybe I will take you up on your offer.”

“If it’ll make you feel better, I’ll stay. But I think I’m just gonna hang out for a while. Drive around downtown see what’s going on. You can always come with me if you want.”

I offered.

“You go ahead. I have some shows to catch up on. Just don’t stay out too late. It’s not like it used to be here these days. These people have lost they damn minds. Did you hear about how they got to shooting up in the Galleria and that 8-year-old boy was killed and 3 others were injured?”

“No, I didn’t hear about that. Damn! That’s messed up.”

What the hell was happening to this city, I thought as a heavy feeling punched me in the gut. Maybe I should just convince mama to sell the house and I’d find her a place in LA. Not that there weren’t crazy people everywhere in the world. But Bham was just getting off the chains ridiculous! 

“And that’s the *main* reason I don’t want you out riding around in the streets and some shit pop off and I get a call in the middle of the night.”

I kissed her on the cheek.

“I’ll come back to you in one piece, and I won’t stay out too late.”

I was just riding around downtown Birmingham, checking out the nightlife on a Friday. Well, that’s new, I thought as a vehicle rode past me that resembled a mix between a bar and a bike all in one and held a group of about 6 people. It looked fun tho! I wondered if I could hop a ride on the party bike. Spontaneously, I parked my car over by one of the buildings and ran to catch up with the bike. A lot of people cheered as they recognized me, and gladly let me hitch-hike. It was a fun 2 hours as it rode all around making stops and some quite interesting places downtown and signed a few autographs. Mom should have come she would have enjoyed it! I snapped a couple of selfies and of me with some of my fans.

When the bike brought us back to where we started, I hopped out. Still not ready to go back to my mom’s. I was just driving, when I heard a live broadcast from Clubb Sky. It seemed like there were some very special guests there tonight. So that’s the direction I headed. And as look would have it there were the world’s most gorgeous women standing outside the club.

“Now who's stalking who?”

Shereece asked me as I pulled out her chair in a semi-private area reserved for VIPS.

“Well, I heard RNB’s finest women were gonna be here so I could think of nowhere better I wanted to be. You look exquisite tonight!”

I said staring at her. Although there were some *additions* that weren’t there before. Why in the world had she thought bigger was better? My girl was *fine* like she was. She didn’t need all that. Even though I knew that was *the look* these days for females (fake everything). I never did anything for me personally. I like women with*real* bodies! 

“You always did have a way with words.”

She sipped on the champagne I had brought over to the table.

“Just the truth. Do you want another truth?”

She nodded curiously.

“I’ve missed you.”

I told her honestly. She snorted.

“Riight! Well, I’m sure you haven’t been sitting around lonely. I know you probably have groupies lined up outside your hotel throwing it at you.”

She was trippin. That was never my style and she knew that.

“None of them were you. I’m serious! You don’t ever think about what we had?”

“Sometimes.”

She admitted.

“Tell the truth. Do you miss what we had just a little? Cause I think about it all the time. I think about *you*.”

I said softly. She just shook her head like she didn’t believe me. I see she’d reverted back to the hard-core version. It wasn’t like that when we were together. When she was with me, I saw a *whole* nother side of Shereece. I saw the side that I made her blush and smile and laugh all the time. I saw the *sweet* side that had let herself fall for me and allowed her to let her guard down a little. We were so in love that were as goofy as two strung out high school kids that couldn’t get enough of one another. I reached for her hand, and she didn’t pull away. I laced my fingers through hers. She didn’t have to say it to me in words. As I gazed into her eyes, I know she still felt it. It felt almost like no time had passed just sitting here with her. 

“How have you been?”

“I’ll just be glad when tomorrow is over with. People just don’t know how much work this is.”

“What do you need?"

I asked her sincerely. She sighed.

“I just wish I could *leave* and go away for a very long time. I’m *tired*.”

I pulled out my phone.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re leaving? Tonight. Name the place and we can be on a flight.”

“You're crazy. I can’t just *leave*. The show... All the work.”

“Cancel it.”

I told her because as far as I could tell her obligations were done. Eye Candy had ended. Her new album was finished and blowing up all over the nation. Now she could chill finally! Now all she had to do was say she wanted to leave with me tonight and let me take care of everything else.

“I can’t do that and what about your games. You can’t just leave like that. You signed a contract.”

“Do you want to know a secret?”

She nodded.

“I’m tired too. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful every day and I’m blessed for being given the opportunity to do what I love best every day for a living. I get to travel all of the world and the fans have been incredible. All the love they’ve shown me since I signed is what keeps me driven and able to go out there and play my best. But I just. I haven’t really been happy in a long time. I know I *should* be. But it just feels like.”

“Something’s missing.”

She filled in. 

"And I think you know what that something is."

“So, you’d just walk out and be on the next flight?”

“If that’s what you wanted.”

I stared into her eyes.

“What about the money?”

I shrugged.

“I’ve never needed a championship ring. I don’t need to play until I’m 50 to retire. I’ve been with the team for 8 years now. I can retire and be good. I haven’t been wasteful. I’ve made good investments so if I never played another game, I’d be well taken care of. But it’s not about what *(* want. If you say we’re leaving this club and headed to the airport then we’ll just have to send them a postcard from wherever in the world we end up. I just want you to be happy.”

I took her hand to my lips and kissed it.

“Do you remember our first date?”

I asked her. Her face lit up and she smiled in a way that took my breath away.

“I remember.”

“You wanted it to be special so you didn’t tell me where we were going. You and Eye Candy were doing your first big tour in Europe and I flew out to see you. Then you took me to Montmartre and you took me to the exact place and street your mother was discovered. Then we went to the neighborhood of the house she grew up in and broke in.”

“No thanks to you. You could have gotten us arrested.”

She laughed and hit me playfully on the arm.

“But we weren’t.”

“We had a picnic right there in the middle of the floor. I’m still not quite sure how you pulled that off.”  
“You know a magician never reveals his secrets.”

I teased.

“Then the Wine Festival?”

I laughed.

“The Wine Festival.”

“You pulled up your phone and played one of our songs and asked me to dance right there in the Square. I think you drank too much of it.”

“I mean when in France right?”

“How long were we there?”

“In Montmartre or just Paris itself?”

“Paris.”

“Not long enough. Probably a few days.”

“When I was a little girl my mom use to take me there on vacations and holidays. She used to go on and on about it, but I never really saw the big deal. Not until that trip. I think that’s when it finally hit me and I fell in love with it.”

“Because of me.”

I said in realization and squeezed her hand. I held it to my heart. 

“Paris was nice!”

I said remembering how we’d walked hand in hand viewing the garden square and the Wall of Love that had I Love You in 250 different languages. And how tempted I’d been to tell her. Then I thought about the beautiful midnight cruise we’d taken along the Seine and how I’d held her close to me and we kissed as we passed under the Pont-Marie (known as the lover’s bridge). She sighed.

“Paris was *very* nice.”

“So, let’s go back there. Let’s go there and never come back.”

“You're crazy! What would we do in Paris?”

“I could open a shop and sell my artwork. Like the artist, we saw in Montemar doing the caricatures in the village. I could do that! I can buy some property.”

Shereece shook her head in amusement.

“What? You’ve seen my sketches. It would be the perfect thing for me. I could just *live* and be *still* and not have to be all over the place. And you could still sing if you wanted to. I know they have night clubs. I know you could get a regular gig. Or you wouldn’t have to work at all. You could take up an interest like arts or crafts or cooking.”

“Are you trying to say I can’t cook Treal? And don’t you dare say it.”

“Boo, no. The cake you made me wasn’t *that* bad! You just didn’t cook it long enough. That’s why it sank. It’s an easy mistake to make. Hey! I loved that cake. My best friend made that cake for me. It was one of the best German chocolate birthday cakes I ever ate. Thank you.”

I told her sweetly. 

“See. I know your lying.”

“I’m not. I’ve had birthday cakes and they were nowhere *near* as good as that one. You see I ate it all."

She burst out laughing.

"You'll eat *anything! You drink ranch out the bottle."

"Don't hate because your culinary taste aren't as fine as mine."

"Whatever!"

"Hey, Promise me when we get to Paris and set up our little place, you’ll make me another one.”

She rolled her eyes but smiled. I reached across the table and kissed her lips that had a slight taste of champagne. When we pulled apart, I felt a set of eyes on me. I looked out into the crowd and saw. SHIT! It was Kyle. He usually wasn’t the confrontational type. He preferred to talk all his crap when not around the people he was mouthing off about. But no telling how this would go if he had too many. He might come up to Reece, get in her face, (or mine), and try to start a scene. I swallowed down a glass of the champagne I’d had brought over. How had he even find me? Was he tracking my moves?

“Do you want to do something else?”

I asked hopefully. The next thing I knew we were making out against my ride. Reece had turned feral on me. She’d jumped up and wrapped her legs around me and was grinding on me like there was no tomorrow. And while a part of my brain was lost in ecstasy and didn’t want her to stop having her way with me. I was sooo hard! But I was conflicted. I had my eyes closed trying to enjoy how her body felt all up on me. She had shoved my head down between her breasts and my lips and tongue were busy but my head said No Treal. What are you doing? Does she want to go back to your hotel? I damn sure couldn’t take her there. Was I in a relationship with Kyle? I don’t remember me telling him any such thing, but he seemed to think we are. Had I given him the impression we were? I knew first hand how rough Kyle could be and I didn’t want him anywhere near her.

“Yes! Reece.”

I moaned as I gripped her and let my hands travel down her back. I wanted this! No, no, I meant I didn’t want this. But there was Harlem. If I got close to her again, maybe she’d trust me enough to give me what I wanted. I owed him that. Man, would she please stop doing *that*. It was making me crazy the way she was running her tongue up my neck. Then she bit down. I had to stop this.

“Shereece.”

I could hardly get the words out, but I had to try.

“I have to tell you something about me.”

“Take me back to your place Treal.”

She moaned in my ear sending shivers through me.

“I want to.”

God, did I want to.

“Or we can leave.”

Leave? I think my heart actually skipped a beat. Leave, leave? Was she saying she wanted us to run away to Paris like we’d just talked about? I paused.

“So, you want me to try to make the reservations?”

Did she mean just mean temporarily we back or permanently we make a life together there? But then I felt her body go slack on me.

“Shereece.”

I whispered. Her arms were around my neck, but she wasn’t moving. WTH! Had Kyle slipped something in her drink? I kinda slid my back against the car and lowered us to the ground. Then I laid her head in my lap. I think I may have yelled help but maybe it was just in my head. Should I attempt CPR? It felt like she was breathing. Should I go back to the club and find Kenneth. Surely, he’d know what to do. But by then, I would have wasted precious time. So I picked up Shereece in my arms, put her in the car gently, and got in heading for the hospital her Dad worked at.

“You’ll be ok.”

I told her softly.

“I’m gonna get you to the hospital. Just please don’t die on me.”

I don’t think my heart could take it. I flipped to a station that played old skool music from when we were in high school. A song came on the radio and I thought back on a memory. It had to be about 6 months into our relationship and I was away with the team. It had been some months since we’d seen each other and I missed her like crazy! One night we were on the phone after dark like you do when you’re in high school and you can’t stand to get off the phone with that special person and you end up falling asleep on each other.

“Do you remember this song?”

I asked. Then I started to sing. Now I’m not a big RNB star but I can hold a note. I was in the choir at school. Face time hadn’t gotten as big yet, so I just had to imagine that she was laying down in one of my jerseys with my team number. Her eyes half-closed. I wished I could be laying there with my arms wrapped around her.

“We were holding hands in the park. We had to hurry home before it’s dark. I can’t wait to see your smile again. And I love the time we spend. I waited for the break of day to come. So I can see your smile in the sun. I guess I couldn’t wait to get to school. To see your pretty face I’ve got to stay cool. Girl don’t leave me. Ooh the way you receive me. Don’t take this as aggression. Girl, I’ve learned my lesson. Don’t leave me, ooh. The natural way you receive me... Don’t take this as aggression. That’s why. I just want to be alone with you. There nothing I’d rather do. I just want the chance I had again. Just us two till the end.”

“Am I falling back in love with you?”

I looked over and asked her unconscious form. I heard her voice in the past say.

“I didn’t know you could sing?”

“I told you. I’m full of surprises!”

“Treal. I love you!”

She said softly and it made my heart melt.

“I love you too boo.”

“I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t. I told you I’m yours. I’m not going anywhere.”

“I’ve heard about athletes having different women all over the place.”

“When do I have time to have different women all over the place?”

I laughed, but actually I thought it was so damn cute that she thought *anyone* could ever replace her and it was making her self-conscious. Definitely not the girl I knew in high school But if I wasn’t practicing or traveling to the next game I was sleeping or I was on the phone with her. She had to know there was no one else for me.

“You're more than enough.”

“Treal do you *really* love me?”

“On everything.”

I told her rolling over in the bed to stare out the window at the sky. I’ll never forget what she said next.

“Treal, I want to be your wife.”

“Are you trying to propose to me boo?”

“I don’t know. I just... I just don’t want to lose you. I want us to get married,”

She repeated. Wow! At that moment, I felt like the luckiest man in the entire world. She’d just said she wanted to marry me. I got quiet a sec. My mind was trying to process.

“Did you fall asleep on me? Or is it you don’t wanna marry me cause there’s someone else.”

Oops! Had been quiet too long. Say something Treal. This wasn’t the way I saw this going. *(* should be the one down on my knee with a ring in a box. Of course, I wanted to marry her, but I wanted to be the one to ask in the most grandiose way imaginable.

“Yes! Yes! I’ll marry you boo.”

“You better have said yes.”

She teased. Now *that* sounded like her and I grinned my behind off. I was gonna be a husband. Possibly one day a father. It all seemed so long ago. But we could get it back. I told myself. So, I drove as quickly as I could. Birmingham cops be damned. My *future* needed me. It didn’t take long between both hers and my status for them to get her into a room. Why was it always so cold in these places? I pulled the blanket closer around her to cover her. Kenneth showed up in the doorway and I stood up.

“Treal?”

“Mr. Jamison. Hey!”

“What happened? I came here to bring Cinda. Something happened to her tonight and then I heard Shereece was here?”

He went over to her on the bed and took her wrist in his hand. Now how to tell *this* story. “Sir, I was making out with your daughter when?” I tried to clean it up best I could.

“We stepped outside for some air and we were *talking*.”

With our tongues, I thought. Kenneth raised his eyebrows at me like son, I’m not dumb. I know what yal were doing. You ain’t gotta lie, Craig. 

“Right well uh she said something. She said.”

Nope! Couldn’t say that either. Cause it sounded like she said she wanted to ride in my ears. And I didn’t think she meant the kind I was doing around downtown earlier. More like the kind Montell Jordan use to sing about. 

“Something about fries.”

“Fries?”

“Or lies? But then she passed out.”

“Ok. Had the two of you been drinking?”

“We just had a little. It wasn’t *that* much. I had champagne sent to the table.”

He considered this slowly. It’s as if something was registering in his brain. He put his hand on my shoulder.

“It’s okay Treal. I don’t blame you. Just something weird was going on at that club. I appreciate that you got her here as quickly as you did.”

“Do you know what happened?”

“I have a vague idea.”

He pulled up a seat.

“For a long time now, Shereece has been having blackouts. We’ve been having test run but they seem to be triggered by something.”

“Do you know what triggers them?”

Kenneth nodded and sighed heavily. 

“I hate to say this but I think I do. I’ve known for some time now.”


	26. Chapter 26

Shereece   
Mind Games

When I came to, I knew exactly where I was by the chill in the air, yet I couldn’t remember how I’d got here. The last thing I remembered was talking to my cousin outside the club and then Treal walked up and spoke. After that, it was just blank. How long had I been here? Where were Cinda and Tasha? I needed to find Tasha. My mind still felt foggy and my body felt like dead weight. Which hospital had they brought me too? Dad, I thought sluggishly. Someone will find him and he’ll come and get me out of here if I just laid here. Then it hit me. Hell, it must have happened again! Damn it! I keep getting these flashes. Who the hell is “Techrat?” I just laid there with my eyes closed until they started to feel heavy again. My mind went in and out of consciousness. I thought I heard a male’s voice and I caught the words “Paris” “I love you” and “I’ll be back” but when I willed my eyes to try and open all I saw was dark. After a little I heard a slight tap on the door, not wanting to be bothered with nurses checking on me while making rounds, I faked sleep. The door opened slightly and a figure stood in the door. I half opened my eyes, still trying to pretend I was sleep. From what I could tell it was a woman. No man. He wore a suit and a hat. He stood there a minute and then I heard the door close behind him. He must have had the wrong room.  
There was another tap on the door and it opened again. I heard a voice say quietly.  
“Mela, are you awake?”  
Only *one* person called me that. I opened my eyes and said tiredly.  
“Do you *have* to still call me that?”  
He just grinned. Then came over and pulled up a chair next to the bed.  
“Yes, I do.”  
He touched my arm and squeezed my hand.  
“How are you feeling?”  
“Tired. It happened again didn’t it?”  
I mumbled.  
“Yeah.”  
He said confirming what I already knew.  
“I’m just gonna look everything over just to be on the safe side and then I’ll bring you the papers. Should take about an hour or so. Until then you can rest. I’ll make sure no one comes in to bother you.”  
“How did I get here? Where’s Cinda? Where’s Tasha?”  
“Well, Treal brought you here. You were with him when it happened.”  
I tried to think.  
“He’s *still* here. What did you do to that man? He hasn’t left your side since he brought you here. I had to practically make him leave the room to call his Mom and tell him he was ok.”  
So it was Treal that was standing in the door? I tried to think.  
“He was outside the club when Cinda and I were talking.”  
“Unfortunately, she’s here too. When I got back to our section, I found her unconscious on the floor. Don’t worry Tasha’s at home. I put her to bed.”  
My head started to feel heavy. I closed my eyes.  
“What happened to Cinda?”  
“I had some test run. There were traces of a new drug in her system by the name of FADE. It’s a new thing going around here that’s used at parties and clubs. It can cause drowsiness and a dissociative feeling from all other parts of the body. Doctors use it as a sedative but if used in large dosages it can stop breathing and cause all kinds of other nasty mind-altering effects. Especially mixed with alcohol. It’s taking everything in me right now not to call my lawyer and have that place fined and shut down. Residue of it was all inside one of the flutes. I slipped one in my jacket as proof. But I need to see how your uncle and aunt feel about it. Although, I’m pretty sure what your aunt will say. But do you know what scares me the most?”  
I shook my head. He sighed.  
“It wasn’t in Cinda’s glass.”  
It was in mine. I laid my head back. Ever since I’d signed to Starlight Music all those years ago, I hadn’t exactly told him *everything*. He knew about blackouts. He knew about the day-to-day stuff in *Reece’s* life. Such as he knew about the album releases, and the interviews, and the photo and video shots, and the tv appearances, and the award shows and movie premiers, and the celebrity events. But what he didn’t know about was the stuff I swept under the rug. He didn’t know about the death threats and blackmails I got in DMS and on my social media pages from jealous bitches claiming I’d been with their man (but was he really tho if he’d gotten with me that easily) or that I’d beaten then out in a movie role or hadn’t picked them at an audience to be in one of our videos. So many threats! No none knew about the *dark side* Maybe it was just time to bury *Reece* for good. Then I thought about something and a set of eyes flashed in my mind. I shivered all over.  
“Light eyes.”  
I whispered. He was *there*. I’d *felt* him. Or was that just another hallucination? I tried to shut the image out of my head. No, I told myself. He’s not real. Then I started to feel cold all over.  
“He was there. He...”  
I faltered. Tears started to well up in my eyes. Why couldn’t he just leave me the hell alone? Dad stood up and walked to the bathroom. He returned with a piece of toilet tissue and wiped my face. He sat next to the bed.  
“Why does he want me, Daddy?”  
I said in a chocked tone. He got quiet for a minute and put his arms around me.  
“Do you remember when you were 11 years old? It was summer vacation. You were all excited because it was the first time you were going to walk the runway with your mother at a big Fashion Week show in Paris.”  
I nodded. He smiled a little.  
“For once the two of you were getting along. Both my girls were happy. She couldn’t stop talking about Fashion Week and neither could you. You even teased her and told her that she might as well get ready to retire because once you took the runway no one would even remember her name. She just laughed and said we’ll see.”  
I listened quietly. I did remember that. Mom and I were probably in one of the best places we’d ever been in at that time. We’d spent hours looking at her footage from previous Fashion Weeks online and her shows and talking about the clothes. She’d even shared with me one of her old sketchbooks from when she was about my age that was full of beautiful designs. I’d never felt closer to her than I did then.  
“I wanted to be there with you both but I had a medical conference in Dallas. I felt horrible! And I was trying to figure out how I could attend the conference and then take a flight there. I just felt in my gut I *needed* to be there! She told me it was ok, but...”  
“I called you every night and you’d go on and on about whatever event you went to that day. But one night I called and you weren’t talking that much. I asked you was something wrong and you just said you were tired. I had this feeling there was more but I didn’t press it. Later, I found out that you and your mother had an argument. Or rather she got upset with you.”  
I tried to think but came up with nothing.  
“I don’t.”  
“Only she didn’t tell me this either. She got short with me and told me it was *nothing*.”  
He sighed.  
“I’d been married to her long enough to know that nothing was always something. I’d been at my conference for about 2 days and it just kept on nagging at me. Until finally, I couldn’t take it anymore, the second night I repacked my bags, called a cab, and took a flight out to Paris. To think if I hadn’t left that night I would have never been able to .. forgive myself. I’ve replayed it over and over and over again.”  
What was he rambling about?   
“I didn’t even check into a room. I hired a rental and drove straight to where the show was supposed to be held. I rushed backstage and the door was locked to the dressing room. So I kicked it down and when I barged into the room I saw you and *him*.”  
I was confused.  
“You saw me and who?”  
“I saw you and Noel struggling. He was on top of you on a couch. Or as you known him “Light Eyes”.  
No! That wasn’t. I mean he couldn’t have. “Light Eyes” was a figment of my imagination. I told myself that so much that I was finally starting to believe it was true. I said quietly.  
“No! He’s not real. He’s...”  
I looked at Daddy with questioning, confused eyes.   
“He’s just a bad dream.”  
Actually, I always knew who “Light Eyes” was. He was a manifestation of my guilty conscience for what I’d done.  
“No. He’s very much *real*. He was .. one of your mother’s *partners*. One of her *toys*. I knew about them and I didn’t know if you knew about them (you probably did) but I tried like hell to keep you from seeing them. I tried to keep her from them but I couldn’t be everywhere. But I told her if she *ever* brought one of them around *you* that was IT. It was over between her and me!”  
“It’s why you separated.”  
I said as realization quickly kicked in. He nodded.  
“You tried to tell her that he was coming on to you, but she accused you of being jealous and trying to take him from her. And then she...”  
He paused.  
“Tell me. Please!”  
“It was a setup. Kaitlyn later told me that the reason the door was locked was because she wanted to test him and you. She wanted to test *him* to see if he was faithful to her. She wanted to test *you* to see how far you’d go with him. Then she planned to cut you both lose.”  
This made me feel absolutely *nothing* as I felt like she’d already don’t that a long time ago when she walked out after I begged her to stay.  
“Daddy he was *here* tonight.”  
Now if this was true and he was a *real* person, it made sense. He’d been stalking me for years.  
“No sweetheart he couldn’t have been at the club tonight. After she died, I saw on the news where he’d committed suicide. They showed his apartment and it was like a shrine covered in her pictures and personal ones she’d taken for him. Videos were leaked of *them*”  
New tears sprang to my eyes. I whispered.  
“I’m sorry.”  
“No. I’m sorry Mela. I am so sorry. I just wanted to protect you. Afterwards, you’d have the worst nightmares in the middle of the night. I couldn’t stand to see you relive what happened over and over.”  
“What did you do Daddy?”  
“I broke up with her right after the show. I told her I didn’t want her anywhere near you or me. I sent you to stay with your Grandma, I put the old house up for rent, and I found us an apartment to stay at temporarily. I changed my number. I thought the nightmares would let up after a while, but they got worse. One night you had one and I came into your room and you begged me to make it stop. So I took you to Atlanta one weekend and I found a hypnotist. I asked if this was what you wanted and you agreed to have that part of your memories wiped. I had my doubts but I would have done anything. I blamed myself for not getting there even earlier. That conference shouldn’t even been a consideration.”  
“Dad it’s ok.”  
“It’s not ok. I was the one that caused * all* this. I should have told you. I should have.”  
I sat up straighter with what energy I looked him in the eye.  
“I have a tumor. The results came back.”  
“Hey. It’s ok. At least now we know what we’re dealing with right? We can start treatments. There are procedures that target and kill cancer cells or revert them to normal cells. They can be shrunk. And you know I got you. I’ma gonna be right *there* the whole time and you *know* I’m the *best*baby! I’ve overseen these kinds of procedures *many* times! I won’t let anything happen to you.”  
“Dad. I.”  
It was all starting to feel like a lot to process and my head was starting to hurt. I closed my eyes.  
“What’s wrong? Does something hurt? What do you need me to get you?”  
“I’m just starting to feel tired and my head.”  
“Rest. I’ll go hunt you down some Aleve. I’ll be right back.”  
I nodded and watched him hurry out the door. Then I let sleep take me again. I’m not sure how long I was out, but when I woke up there was someone sitting next to me in the dark. I started to sit up not recognizing the person. They didn’t look like a nurse. Had they just been .. watching me while I slept? Goosebumps raised themselves all over my arms.   
“No, darling. Don’t move! Here, let me. Are you cold? They always keep it so damn cold in here. It’s nothing at all like home. I should call the nurse station to complain. Are they trying to freeze you to death? Do they have any idea who you are?”  
She touched my arm lightly and then hopped up to turn on the heater.  
“Home?”  
“That’s right love. Our home. Our *real* home!”  
“Who are you?”  
I asked wearily. She laughed.  
“I know it’s been a while, but don’t tell me you don’t recognize me.”  
“No!”  
“I’m your mother silly!”  
Ok. They’d given me something in either that IV or whatever I’d had at that club was it Wine? Champagne? Vodka?   
“I’m hallucinating.”  
“No sweetheart. I’m here. You didn’t think I’d leave my baby, here did you?”  
“My mother’s dead! And if you knew anything about *her* at all you know she *would*. So I don’t know who you are or what game you're trying to play, but if you don’t tell me *who* the hell you are I’m pressing this.”  
I put my finger on the nurse’s button.  
“And my Dad will be back in a minute and somehow I don’t think he’ll be as *patient* as I am.”  
“But sweetheart he already knows.”  
I stared at this person who felt eerily familiar.  
“Oh, he didn’t tell you, did he? I thought that after all this time.”  
Great! Storytime again.   
“Do you know who I am?”  
She crossed her legs.  
“The pycho in my room that won’t leave and let me rest?”  
I answered. I wanted to add bitch in there.  
“We’ve met before! Several times actually. I remember the first time. You had to be about 1 years old. When she showed you to me, I thought she’s beautiful! You looked just like me. “  
She wasn’t making no damn sense.  
“When she was 18 because of a miscarriage the doctor told her she’d never been able to have kids. He knew that, but it didn’t stop him from pressuring her. He wouldn’t leave her alone about it. I remember one night she called me in tears and it broke my heart. So we all made an agreement.”  
Oh, HELL NO! This bitch didn’t just suggest. But she continued.  
“I agreed that I would let her and him raise you as there’s after she’d tried many times to conceive. I loved her and I feared for her. God, you should have seen his temper! She could hardly go anywhere without him having her followed.”  
“So *your* my mother!”  
“That’s right.”  
“And you and my Dad hooked up.”  
She laughed.  
“Oh, many times love. We all did!”  
“Then why are you here *now*?”  
“Because I’ve come to take you home. I’ve been away from you for so long! It was never what I wanted. I wanted us to raise you together in your real home Paris. I would have gotten you into the best schools. Given you the nicest clothes to wear and shoes. We would have had our own beautiful little Garden home with a lake with a butler and maids. You’d never have to want for anything. Every time she brought you, I admit I was jealous. I thought of the life we could have had together. But I heard about the breakup with your band and I am *so* sorry. But don’t you see. It’s just you and me. I already have your ticket. Right after the show, we can leave. I can’t wait for you to meet your brother. We can finally be a family. And I cannot wait for you to see the surprise I have for you. Oh, you'll love it. My precious baby girl."  
This lady was bat shit crazy if she thought that I believed *any* of this non-sense. She reached into her purse and laid an envelope on my lap.  
“I’m *tired*! It’s been a *long* night.”  
I said indicating it was time for her to go.  
“I know this is a lot to take in my darling and I know how crazy this all sounds. I just felt it was time you knew the truth about your real mother. It’s all there! Don’t be mad at Bianca. She loved you! She only wanted to protect you.”  
Right! I shut my eyes and shut her out. I heard her gathering her coat and then I heard the door close behind her. I was alone once again. Who to believe? Clearly, that woman was high as shit if she thought she’d conceived me. But then again. Bianca had lied to me so much over the years. She’d been absentee most of my life and then I find out she’d basically tried to pimp me out to one of her lovers. Why the hell was I throwing this show again? Maybe I *should* hear this lady out. On second thought she probably would have made a much better mother than the one I had. That was for damn sure, I picked up the envelope and was about to stick it in my purse, but realized that damn it, I had no idea where it even was. Could this night get any *better*? Maybe I should just up and leave her hanging like she’d done me over and over and over. But there was Tasha. I knew she didn’t want to go back to Haven House for some odd reason. I knew she had her heart set on staying here, but didn’t she see? I’m *mentally* damaged. I’d find a way to screw her life up, just like I’d screwed my own up. But I least owed it to her to get her back safely where people *could* properly keep her safe. I’d talk to Danse. I’d set up an account in her name so she’d be cared for. Then when the time came, I’d still give her the part in the biopic. I’d keep my word on that.I also needed to check on Lucinda. Once again, I’d gotten people into my shit. Which brought the question if “Light Eyes” had committed suicide, who had tried to do me in at the Club. And why did I keep trying to bring up .. FUCK! Enough. No more thinking. I let myself drift back into la-la-land until Dad came back and got me out of this place.


	27. Chapter 27

Caryn  
Mind Games

“Are we going on a trip mama?”  
Caryn asks as she says her mother opening her suitcase and throwing her clothes in.  
“Do you remember my friend Katie?”  
“The one with the cookies?”  
“Yes, Well you’re gonna go stay for her for a little while.”  
“Are you coming?”  
“No. I have an important audition for a big show coming up and I really need to focus. Katie has a place two hours from here. She’ll be here in 30 minutes so I need you to pack all your stuff so you don’t forget anything.”  
“But mama when are you coming?”  
“As soon as everything settles down and the show is over.”  
“But mama I wanna see you dance!! You told me I could see you!”  
“Caryn, I need you to do what I say.”  
“But mama, I wanna see you dance. Why can’t I see you dance?”  
“Because. It’s just not the right time.”  
“When is the right time?”  
“Look, this is really important to me. Can’t you just cut me a little slack? I’m under a lot of pressure. Work has been slow and I’m doing my best to keep us in this apartment and feed and clothe you. I just need a little space and I need you to act like a big girl and understand. I need to get this place ready because I’m having company later.”  
“Can I meet them? Is it Gary? I wanna stay and see Gary?”  
“Caryn, I’m not playing. Do what I say?”  
“No! I want to stay *here*! I don’t want to go! Why can’t I stay here with you?”  
Diane turns her back to Caryn as guilt hits her but she quickly stuffs it down. She turns around and kneels down to Caryn.  
“Hey! It’ll only be for a little while hunh. It’ll be just like going to Disneyland. They have an ice-cream parlor. You like ice-cream? Auntie Katie will take you to get ice cream. And then you might even get to see a burrow.”  
“What’s a burrow?”  
“It’s like a baby donkey.”  
Caryn scrunches up her face and starts to cry.  
“I don’t want a donkey. I wanna stay here with you.”  
“Caryn PLEASE don’t start this today ok. The quicker you leave, the quicker I can do what I need to do to make this money. The quicker I make this money the quicker I can come and get you. Stop being so dramatic”  
Someone knocks on the door and Diane looks around the room making sure no traces of a child were ever there.   
“I won’t go!”  
Caryn yells. Diane ignores her and goes to answer the door.  
“Hey! Are we all set?”  
Diane sighs.  
“She didn’t take it well I take it.”  
“Don’t look at me like that. You *know* how it is.”  
“Yeah, I know.”  
“If there was any other way don’t you think I’d…”  
Katie cuts Diane off and goes into Caryn’s room and tries to open it. However, they find out the door is locked. Diane pounds on the door.  
“OH, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! CARYN IF YOU DON’T BRING YOUR ASS OUT! YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!”  
“Caryn this is your auntie. Open the door sweetheart and we can talk about it.”  
“IM NOT GOING! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!”  
“GIRL IF YOU DON’T GET YOUR ASS OUT THAT ROOM!”  
“Well, Diane we tried but it doesn’t look like she’s coming. I guess I’ll just have to tell Felix she doesn’t want to meet him. He’s gonna be so disappointed! I’m gonna have to take care of him all by myself.”  
Caryn gets quiet and listens.  
“And I guess I’ll have to eat all that candy by myself. Oatman has the *best* candy in the whole world! Isn’t that right Diane? Remember the last time we went to Boatman’s candy shoppe and we got those gigantic lollipops and cotton candies. And then didn’t they have those HUGE gumballs? But that’s not the best part is it? Did you tell her about the Oatman Hotel?”  
“No. I didn’t think she could handle it.”  
Diane said playing along knowing that Caryn *hated* people to think she couldn’t do something or was too scary.   
“SHES TOO SCARED TO EVEN LEAVE?”  
“Some of the people in town say that the hotel is occupied by ghosts and sometimes at night you can see them in the windows if you're lucky. Especially Oatie. He only appears to *special* people. But you have to be *brave*!”  
“Well I guess she’ll never see him cause all she is (is) a big *baby*!”  
The door swings open.  
“I’M NOT A BABY! HE WILL SHOW HIMSELF TO ME!”  
“Prove it!”  
*  
***

When I woke up, the sky was slightly light. I shifted and noticed Andy sitting beside me. We were in my bedroom back home?   
“Hey! How do you feel?”  
She asked. I struggled to process my thoughts.  
“Mom.”  
‘It’s ok. The dispatchers showed up and gave her an examination. It wasn’t good. Someone gave her bad drugs and it instantly stopped her heart. I had them send the body to the coroner. I have the number. It’s right on your dresser. I hope you didn’t mind me doing that. You looked like you couldn’t have taken much more. We waited for the paramedics to come in my car, and before I knew it you were knocked out. I didn’t want to wake you.”  
Bad drugs? Great! It was probably that fool she’d been seeing. I never trusted his ass. He’d probably set her up so he could rob her blind. Then when I thought back the apartment was practically empty when I got there. I needed coffee.   
“I... Thank you!”  
“I drove you back home and put you to bed. Oh, I also cleaned you up a bit. You’d gotten a little on you.”  
Blood? Funny. I hadn’t remembered actually touching Diane’s body. But then maybe I had. My head was in such a daze when I’d seen her slumped over on the floor. Interestingly enough, it didn’t bother me that she said she’d seen me naked. My head started to spin again and I coughed. Andy reached over and handed me a cup with some water in it.  
“Drink. I’ll go make you something stronger. You probably haven’t eaten in hours. I can fix you something.”  
She said brushing some of my hair back from my face. I hated to think how I looked right now. I’ve never been a good sleeper.   
“You stay there! Is there anything in particular you want?”  
“Coffee.”  
“Are you sure? I can make you anything you want.”  
“Maybe eggs, bacon.”  
“Coming right up love.”  
As she opened the door to go out, Afrika came in. The two looked at each other wearily. Afrika rushed over to me.  
“Shit! I heard. Are you ok?”  
“Diane had an addiction. She’s had it for a long time. She started using when she started showing signs of aging and because of that, she stopped getting calls for shows. She was a showgirl. She kept it up as long as she could. She’d use men with money to get her operations facelifts, breast enhancements, stomach tucks, Botox. Everything! She eventually found other work, but I don’t think she ever really got over it. For a long time, she blamed having me.”  
“So, you weren’t close.”  
“Actually, we’d come a long way from where we use to be when I was in school. We started to talk before I joined Eye Candy. She told me she was trying. I think for a while she was. I never told my Dad or Reece, because I knew how they felt about her, but sometimes I’d call when we were on tour and Facetime. I even taught her how to Zoom and bought her a computer. Although she’d fuss about how new technology was too complicated, she’d gotten better at it. Sometimes, I’d even come home for the weekend if we had a break just to check on her and make sure she had food and electricity. I used to wonder why I cared after everything that lady put me through.”  
Now I just felt numb.  
“She was your *mom*.”  
Afrika said simply as if this was reason enough. Was she *really* tho? I wanted to tell her half the time it didn’t feel like it at all. Half the time, *I* was the one trying to take care of her.  
“So when was the last time you talked to her?”  
“A month ago.”  
I thought back to when I was in Orlando, before everything. I had just moved into the Darcy and it was the night before we were supposed to leave on our flight for Orlando. I was going to pack my stuff and then spend the night at the old place so we’d all be at the same place so we could leave together. 

***

“Hey.”  
I said looking at her looking back at me. I never knew what kind of mood she was gonna be in. But she was smiling so that was a good sign. She was wearing the silk robe I’d sent her.  
“I see you got your Christmas present.”  
“I did and I love it! Yours might be a little late. I’m still waiting on some money.”  
“Thanks ok. I’m just glad you like it.”  
She always did like luxury things.  
“I’m not going to keep you. We’re about to fly out to Kimber and Rio’s wedding. Are you sure you won’t come? I can still send for you or we’re taking the Starlight plane. I’m sure they won’t mind making a stop.”  
I wasn’t sure how Reece would feel about that but... I remember she’d paused then said.  
“I may be leaving soon to go on a trip of my own.”  
She said mysteriously.  
“What kind of trip?”  
I asked suspiciously. She didn’t have any real friends that I knew of. There was a lady at the church that use to come back and check on her and want them to do things together, but after a while, she stopped answering the ladies' calls and pretended, she was there when she came by. All she ever wanted to do know was lay up under her new man Greg her supplier.   
“Well, I wasn’t gonna say anything but I think it’s time!”  
She said excitedly. Time? I looked at her blankly.  
“Gregg has been hinting that he wants to take me away somewhere warm and exotic and I think he’s going to ask me to marry him!”  
She squealed. I just stared at her. Had she forgotten this man had a wife and a son? Did she seriously believe that because he came over and they screwed and got high *and drugged* out of their minds that he was gonna put a ring on her finger and turn her into a wife.   
“And I can’t wait to get the HELL out of here and never look back!”  
Then she started to ramble like a love-sick teenager.  
“I already have my bags packed. I’ve just been trying to decide what to wear when he proposes. I wonder if he’ll do it the first night we arrive. Did I already say we’ve decided on Jamaica? Maybe I should wear that slinky red number that fits me so good. You know red is his favorite color. God, I can not wait to be Ms. Gregg Thompson. That man does things to my body that you wouldn’t BELIEVE girl. I swear his tongue and the way he uses it is just MAGIC!”  
I was quiet. Ok, first of all, I’d been here MANY times. Gregg was not gonna show up tonight or any other night to swoop her up and take her to the airport where they could be happily ever after. What would happen is he’d put it off because “something can up”. “Something” being his wife, who probably knew what the hell was up and keep his ass “busy” with holiday stuff. He might find a moment to drop by and break her off and then get in her head about it not being “the right time”. Which it would never be. Then she might get mad but after he worked his tongue magic on her and gave her a hit she’d be fine. How could she be so blind. But then again, it took me a minute.  
“Why are you being so quiet?”  
“I’m just listening.”  
Then she did a 360 on me and started going off.  
“Oh, I get it.”  
“What?”  
“Don’t you start with me? I know what your thinking. Your thinking (‘m not good enough for a man like that.”  
What? How had she jumped all the way to that?  
“Your thinking he won’t leave that bitch for me. Well, I give him more than she ever could and I know what I have between my legs is WAY better than her old dried up pu...”  
“I didn’t say that.”  
“Or maybe you want him for yourself. I see the way you look at him when you stop by and he’s here. Well *bitch* you can forget about it. You can’t have my man. Maybe you should try to keep your man on a leash. Cause oh, that’s right I had him too!”  
“Bye Diane.”  
I said and hung the phone up on her. 

***  
“WHAAT? SHE HAD YOUR MAN? WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE MEAN BY THAT?”  
I shrugged tiredly. Not caring now as much as I had when she said it. Maybe Blaze had stopped by my apartment to pick me up when I was in school. Maybe they’d meet. Maybe behind my back, they’d hooked up. Maybe she’d even done it out of hatred and spite, but did it *really* matter now? They were both *gone*!  
“That is so FUCKED UP! SHIT! I see why you left here!”  
“It was the drugs!”  
I exclaimed unemotionally.   
“Do you really think she was with *him* tho? Who does that shit?”  
“It really wouldn’t surprise me.”  
“And you sound so calm about it. Like it ain’t no thang! I wish find out my man and my mama fucking round *together*. OH, HELL NO! It would be ON! I’d drop both they asses.”  
“Blaze and I .. We’d been over a *long* time ago! I was just ready to move on. It does hurt just a little though to think she’d do that to me after everything I did to try to help her. But sometimes she could be low down like that. It’s messed up but I’m use to it.”  
I said tiredly.   
“FUCK you come here for one dead mother and the other one dies. What are you gonna do about the show?”  
That’s right the show was today.   
“I guess I can go down to the coroner’s office and make all the funeral preparations this morning. The show isn’t until later.”  
“You know you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. I’m sure Reece would understand. No offense and everything but Bianca was more her mother than yours. I mean you don’t even really want to go.”  
“Yeah I know but I need to be there for my sister and Dad. Besides, the funeral preparations won’t take long. Diane wasn’t really close to anybody so it’s not like I have to send out a lot of invites. And she didn’t really own anything like possessions or property. She had a car but I can sell that or return it. I’ll probably just do something simple and she wanted to be cremated.”  
“Did she have other family? Do you have to call her job? I can if you want me to.”  
I tried to think. Diane went through so many jobs. Where had she told me she was working? Was it CVS? Or was it Target? I’d have to see if there was any check stubs at her place. To Afrika, I simply said.  
“Thanks!”  
“So, what’s up with your *girlfriend*?”  
“She’s not. She’s just. I just meet her. We’re in a car club together.”  
“Oh.”  
“What?”  
“Nah girl. It ain’t my place. If yal cool then.”  
“Tell me.”  
I looked at Afrika. She shrugged.  
“I don’t like the bitch! She been looking at me all crazy since she got here. Like I’m the one who doesn’t belong here. Oh *IM* the one who doesn’t belong here. Did you invite her to the fashion show?”  
I shook my head. I didn’t remember even mentioning it to her. That night seemed like a blur now.   
“So why the fuck is she *here*? And all up under you like yal *together*. How did she even know you were *gonna* be here?”  
That *was* a good question. Suspicion started to prickle my mind. And how did she know where Diane lived? No one should know that other than Dad and Shereece. I tried to give Afrika a rational explanation.  
“The show was on Shereece’s social media page. She probably tagged me and she could have saw it on my page. Or I could have posted something myself about it. I’m sure she didn’t just *stalk* me here.”  
“You said it. I didn’t.”  
She mumbled.   
“I’ll take you back. Right after the show. I can come back.”  
“But if she look at me crazy again or says something to me, it’s gone be me and *her*. She doesn’t know nothing bout me. So she better check herself. I know this is yo place and I’ma try to respect that but if she *EVER* get in my face.”  
I promised. Afrika said it was whatever, but I had a feeling that if I didn’t there would be issues, and that right now was the last thing I needed. Luckily the two seemed to be good at avoiding one another. When Andy came back in the room and sat a tray in front of me, Afrika excused herself and said something about taking a morning jog around the neighborhood. Andy simply ignored her and sat next to me on the bed.  
“If you need anything else please let me know. This is a horrible thing to have to come home to?”  
“Andy. Tell me the truth. I just meet you and something isn't sitting with me."  
“Yes.”  
“How did you know where I was? I never told you about the fashion show and I never told you where my mother lives.”  
I stared her straight in the eyes. She blushed a little.   
“Can I tell you a secret?”  
I nodded.   
“God this is gonna make me sound like such a weirdo! Every since I was a little girl, I discovered I had a *gift*. I’m psychic. Yes, it’s really a thing.”  
She tucked her long hair behind her ears.  
“So, you have visions?”  
“They first started when I could barely talk. I had to be about 3 years old. There was this really nice lady that used to sit for me while my parents. One night, I woke them up screaming and crying hysterically. I keep saying her name and telling them she was burning. They thought I Was just having a nightmare. The next day they waited for her to show up to watch me and she never came. My Dad drove by the house and the paramedics were there and the house had burnt to the ground. She’d had something out the stove, forgotten, and fell asleep.”  
“Damn! I’m sorry.”  
“After that, they freaked me out so bad, I tried to *will* them away. I was just a kid. For a minute, it seemed to work. But then they started coming back to me stronger. I hope that doesn’t make me seem too weird. My brother is probably the only other person that knows.”  
“So, you saw me.”  
She turned around to face me and sat crossed legged.  
“I saw the number 10. I saw a room with a lady that was slumped over. I saw a sign with the name of the apartments. I saw blood!”  
She shivered violently.  
“I got in the car and I just drove and I found myself here. I was scared. I’m sorry.”  
I reached out and hugged a shaking Andy.  
“It’s ok. I’m not mad.”  
After that I decided to take a shower, get dressed, and go down to the funeral home to make arrangements. Andy and Afrika both offered to go with me but respected my decision that it was something I wanted to do alone. I decided on a simple, private, memorial service and then I would honor her wishes and have her cremated. I also picked out a casket. She’d of course be buried in the blue dress that she loved so much. I’d just have to go back to the apartment and pick it up. I planned to have the service early Monday. On the way out a woman was waiting for me as soon as I stepped out the door. She immediately wrapped me up in a big hug. Oh OKAY! I stared at her oddly.  
“Do I know you?”  
“Of course, it’s been so long. You couldn’t have possibly remembered, could you? I was a *very* good friend of your mother's. Hell, you might as well call *me* your mother. I practically raised you until you were 6 years old. The hair thew me off for a minute.”  
What was this lady talking about?   
“I don’t know you.”  
I said warily because I had to be careful. I *was* a celebrity and some fans were a little erratic thinking they *knew* us.   
“Of course, you do. Oatman. Felix. Our little house smack in the middle of the Wild west. We had the *best* times together. You used to beg every day for me to take you to the sweet shop. You were the cutest thing. You’d eat so much candy you’d get sick all over the house, and then beg to go right back the next day.”  
I tried to place her face but she was wearing big, dark, shades that hide her eyes and hat shadowed her face.  
“So, you knew my mother?”  
“I did. I knew your mother *very* well! It was my connections that got her in those shows you know. I was the one that introduced her to your father.”  
No. That wasn’t right. My mom met my Dad on a flight. Clearly this lady didn’t have her story straight or she had me mistaken for someone else.   
“Didn’t she tell you? She had it BAD for that man. He was the biggest casting director around back then and had a number of Broadway hits under his belt. When your mother saw him, it was love at first sight. Oh, we both had our eyes on him. But in the end well let’s just say her *talents* went way past just on stage and even though she was just 16 and he was 25 Gary couldn’t resist. He made her the lead dancer.”  
Gary? I stopped and looked at her.  
“My father’s name is Clifton Maurice.”  
“Is that what she told you? Diane always did have a way of convincing people to see things her way. Just never thought she'd. Well then again, I guess it’s not a stretch.”  
She pulled a lighter out of her purse and a pack of cigarettes and lit one.   
“It’s why she practically gave you to me in the first place you know. She couldn’t stand the thought that people would find out about you and thus that she was a now “spoiled goods”. Plus, Gary was already starting to lose interest for the next hot, young, piece of ass. So, she couldn’t very well let him know about *you* could she?”  
“So how do you know this?”  
“I can tell you everything. But I doubt you’d want me to do that standing here in the parking lot. I have a house around here by the Heritage Center. If you don’t mind following me there, I’ll tell you everything you need to know.”  
Did she really seriously think I was that dumb? I gave her this look like lady, please.  
“I’m not gonna hurt you, Caryn. I have no reason to do that.”  
I just continued to look at her.  
“Fine. We can have lunch at Subway at the Heritage Towne Center.”  
I admit I was a little curious what she had to say. The Heritage Town Center was something like a strip mall. So we ordered and sat down at one of the tables in the back. She offered to get the food and then returned. She immediately dug in. I however started right in on the questions.  
“You said you knew my mother how?”  
“Your mother and I first auditioned for Chicago together in Vegas. We got close, shared a space, did lots of shows together. I got tired of it after a while but it was like a drug to Diane. She just never was able to shake.”  
“And you say this man Gary? How do you know he was my father?”  
“I remember the night she came to my room crying telling me she was pregnant and how scared she was that someone would find out about it and her career would be over. She wanted to abort you. I convinced her to keep you and that I would raise you as mine.”  
I raised my eyebrows at the obvious difference.  
“I’d say I’d adopted you of course. Even tho I was an ex-showgirl with a wild past. I dated all kinds of men. All kinds. So, it wasn’t so far-fetched to believe I’d been with a black man. Oh, I’d been with plenty. Mmm! They did make the best lovers!”  
She laughed. I seriously doubted anyone would think I was her biological child. I remembered.  
“There was a man that use to come by our place. I remember he always had candy.”  
“Yep. That sounds like Gary, Short, dark hair.”  
“He always smelled like mint.”  
“You have a good memory.”  
Then why couldn’t I remember her.  
“So, how did you know Diane had passed?”  
“Well, do you know how sometimes a person will just... cross your mind out of the blue? The internet is a wonderful thing, isn’t it? No one can stay hidden these days. I just did a little searching. Found out the address. But when I got there you must have just left. Someone outside filled me in on the rest. Even though they hadn’t said a name, I just had a bad feeling.”  
“If you and she were so close why check up on her now?”  
“Diane and I had a big fight years ago. Because of an illness, I was no longer able to take care of you, but she begged me for a little more time. I told her she needed to take responsibility for her actions and she told me to mind my own damn business. I wanted to keep you Caryn, but I was in and out of the hospital. It was either take you back or turn you over to a foster care facility. Of course, she was pissed. She told me never to ask her for another thing as long as she lived and that she never wanted to see my face again.”  
She sighed.  
“I could tell she was using again. But if I were with Gary.”  
“What was wrong with Gary?”  
“Oh, he was all charm when he first meet you. If you were his new girl, he’d break out all the stops. There’d be the flowers after shows, the fancy cars he’d sent to pick you up after shows, the deliveries of gifts left in your dressing room. Then after a couple of months, the thrill would always wear off. He’d turn ugly and then they’d just... go missing”  
“Missing?”  
“Diane and I had another friend named Jessica. She was very dedicated and would never miss dance class. So, while Gary was seeing Diane, he was also seeing Jessica. I caught them together backstage. Then all of a sudden, she started missing practices and classes and shows. We’d call her phone no answer. So, one day we decided to go by her apartment and we found her. Hung up in the bath tub.”  
“She committed suicide.”  
“Well, that’s what he wanted it to look like. Jessica was a nice girl. She had talked to me about telling Diane the truth about her and Gary. But my thought is that he got to her first.”  
“He killed her.”  
I mumbled in realization. The lady just gave me a knowing look.  
“Gary had a very VIOLENT temper and if you crossed him… well you didn’t wanna cross him.”  
“What happened to Gary? Is he still alive?”  
“Oh, we don’t talk about that.”  
The lady said. Then emphasized.  
“We *never* talk about it.”  
“Tell me.”  
She reached across the table and touched my arm.  
“No one could blame you, honey. You were young. I’m sure in the long run you did the world a favor. You were his child after all so you got it honest. But look at the time. I just forgot I have somewhere to be.”  
She started picking up her trash and taking it to the trash can.  
“Wait. What did I do to Gary.”  
“It was nice talking to you again Caryn.”  
She said and hurried out the door. I followed her but she turned back around. She made it to her car, got in, started it off, and peeled out of the small area. As I stood there, mind reeling my hands started to shake.


End file.
